In This Tainted Soul
by Dr Megalomania
Summary: Someone's come back from Clow's past and he wants Keroberos and Yue dead, but why? What possible mistake could Clow have made? Go back before Yue, before Keroberos . . . before the cards . . . find out what new evil threatens Sakura and her friends . . .
1. ****IN THE NOW****

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
Let me take a moment to explain the reason why I've written this story, first Kris the Intrepid Geek Queen is *right* there is NOT enough stuff out there on Clow Reed, and I also like to mention Morgan D. , Beautiful Midnight and Mateem Bluewing. . . if you have never read any of these good people's work. . . [Points at favourite authors] then GO! Go . . . *later* after you've read this and left a review . . . and read their CCS stories . . . [Gasps] because they are *soooooooo* good!! Second, it's hopefully going to be a back story for one of the characters in a ficcy I hope to write with the Blue Goo . . . [Looks threateningly at the Blue Goo] . . .Won't we?! I've tried to stick to cannon so . . . if I've got it slightly out, it's because a/ I'm improvising, b/ I have interpreted the info I've collected, so it's my own opinion of what happens, or mostly likely c/ I HAVEN'T *SEEN* ANY EPISODES BEYOND THE FIRST SERIES!!! [Breaks into Kero- deprived-of-pudding-like sob]  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
****IN THE NOW****  
  
The flight had been long, and arduous upon his torn wing.  
  
He folded the weaker scaled appendage under the other in his habitual way.  
  
His feet now firmly planted upon the roof, he gazed out upon the deserted street.  
  
"Now," he murmured to no one in particular, "where are you . . .?"  
  
He could see through a few un-curtained windows, saw a little blonde boy playing with his toys. Probably squealing with delight, the child peered up at a much-loved parent. The sight made his lip curl with disgust. The winged being focused once more on his task; the sight of the adoring child was unsettling his cold heart. It brought once happy feelings forward, ones he had thought he had destroyed long ago. They threatened his purpose. His eye narrowed, //NO!!// The part of him that hate had taken as it's stronghold screamed, //I want justice, I want revenge . . .//  
  
"My dear, sweet, little brothers . . ." he giggled inanely, "Where are you? . . . come out, come out wherever you are. . ." his voice took a chilling note as he began to sing a centuries old song, that he used to sing for them, he twisted the lullaby coldly, "little sun beam, little moon beam. . . where are you?. . . little sunbeam, little moonbeam. . .I've finally found you . . . " His dark jade eye settled on a single house on the corner of the road, his lips curling again this time in cold amusement. "Revenge . . . colder than the Freeze card could ever serve." He began to chuckle, his mirth twisted by the insanity he had had since childhood, and the murderous desire that had turned his black heart to ice.  
  
His dark, scaled wings spread, and he stepped to the edge of the rooftop. The moonlight glinted off the ancient but sharp pair of scissors he had tied to his ankle.  
  
For a brief moment, he pressed a pale hand against the right side of his face. He brushed the longer side of his black, shiny fringe away, and pressed his hand against the hollow that was where his right eye had once resided. The cold fingers trailed over to the fleshy ruins of his right ear.  
  
"An eye for an eye, Keroberos . . ." He grinned darkly, as he pulled the fringe back over the ancient scars. ". . . and an ear for an ear, Yue. . ." The dark eye once again settled on the small house at the corner of the road.  
  
"I've come to finish . . ." He hissed, " . . . what I should have begun all those years ago . . ."  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . . 


	2. Every Story Must Have It’s Beginning . ....

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
I should probably make this very clear, this is the prequel to a story that is going to written . . . actually more of a back story to one of the characters I made and fell in love with . . . what can I say, I'm a sucka for traumatised screwball bunny wunnies esp. ones with homicidal tendencies!!  
  
Also this story is gonna have some pretty strong language, and some scenes of Yaoi or lemon, whatever the right term is. . . [I'm a newbie! And proud of it!] Anyway, two *guys* will be getting it on, now . . . if you don't agree with such a thing, or find it utterly offensive, or even are immature and/or stupid enough to ignore THIS WARNING about it and then go on to flame me about it later then . . . what are you still doing here?! You've got free will, use it! Go read something that you won't find offensive and let the rest of us enjoy my weird and gender-not-restricting world of love! Sheesh! Or. . . give it a try. . .[winks] you might like it!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part one: Every Story Must Have It's Beginning . . .  
  
  
  
****IN THE TIME BEFORE****  
  
  
  
//Perfect . . .//  
  
The new mansion was large and imposing. //Simple perfect.// he thought as he tipped his head back to try and see the roof. At it's highest, the mansion had six floors. It was perfectly old, and in good condition. He turned away from the house to consider the mansion's grounds. There was at least half a mile between the gates and mansion, and beyond the gates lay a deep forestland. The mansion was obscured from prying eyes. "Perfect." He whispered to himself. The coachman approached him, drawing off his old cap in some respectful way.  
  
Marcibay Hilligans had been a coachman for darn near twenty years now, and he'd seen thousands of folk, using his coach to get from place to place, each traveller was unique and as interesting as the next, and Marcibay never minded talking to them. However, the young'un that had ordered his coach to help him move to this old forgotten house today, this particular young'un struck something in Marcibay's bones. Marcibay's mama had witchin' blood in her, and some of that blood had been passed to Marcibay. He had witchin' bones, gram-ma had always said. Marcibay had always been very grateful for it, it allowed him to see the bad'uns from good'uns. This young'un though . . . he couldn't read this one, the young'un was powerful, very powerful, and had the potential to do great good or do great evil. But Marcibay didn't worry too much about it, he had the overall feeling the boy would do right in the end, but Marcibay knew that the boy would make some mistake that would haunt the poor young'un till death . . . // . . .an' then sum . . .// Hilligans shook his head, wondering where that thought had come from, he wasn't a religious man and didn't believe in the afterlife, but for some reason Marcibay had the feeling that this young'un would live on in some way even after his death.  
  
The dark haired boy smiled, he was aware that the coach man possessed some magical energy, it paled in comparison to his but that was of no matter. "Mister Hilligans . . . I have a request of you to make."  
  
"Aye sir?" The sinewy older man shuffled from one foot to the other.  
  
The boy smiled again, "I know what you feel, about the powers you possess . . ."  
  
"Laddie . . ." Hilligans put his cap back on, "Thy don't scare me . . . I know tha' thee know an' thy know tha' I know. What is thy request?"  
  
The boy never lost his smile, he was young, just on the cusp of adulthood, and couldn't have been older than sixteen or seventeen. He nodded, "I would like to hire you as my permanent coachman, I have more than enough to pay for your full time service . . ."  
  
"I've no doubt tha' thy can." Marcibay spoke gruffly, "But makes thy think I wish t' be thy manservant?"  
  
The boy laughed, "I have no desire to make you my manservant, just that when I wish to be taken somewhere," he tipped his head grandly, the boy had obviously grown up in a very rich and prestigious family, "I want to be able to depend on you solely." A hint of sincerity appeared in his eyes as he smiled again, "I like you."  
  
A smile twitch at the elderly coach driver's lips, he sniffed and looked out upon the foggy lawns, he nodded slowly. "Aye, grounds large as these, 'ouse far too outsized f' boy like thee . . ." he looked at Clow, his old eyes held a humoured glint, "Thy needs sum'un t' make sure thy don't get thee int' mischief."  
  
Clow Reed's smile broadened to a grin, as Hilligans turned to unload the coach.  
  
  
  
Heavy, dark oak doors swung open creakily.  
  
"Tadaima!" Clow cheerfully called out, and the word bounced of the old walls, ricocheting into the dark. As the echo faded, Clow stepped further into the large hall.  
  
"What kind'a speak is tha'?" Hilligans dropped the first large holder, and wiped his brow, the coachman wasn't as young as he wished he were.  
  
The dark hair boy turned his head slight, "Japanese. Wonderful people, terribly proper." Clow lifted his hands and clapped twice, in short sharp gestures. The shadow recoiled as if in pain as candles burst into light. Clow smiled, as he took in the greeting hall, it was huge and revealed four floors, with stairs criss-crossing to each floor. He frowned slightly as he realised that some of the stairs had collapsed. "Well, we can soon fix that," Clow muttered as he turned to fetch some of his own baggage.  
  
Hilligans stood on the top of the coach, as he threw the straps off the top cases. Clow held his hands up, waiting for the bags to be passed to him. Marcibay straighten, "Nah Laddie, these bags 'ill be too heavy for thee." Hilligans pushed his hat back, "Too heavy for me an' all." Clow hummed and walked around the carriage, he stared at each bag intently. "There it is." He pointed at an old green case, it held several strange markings on it, markings that Marcibay knew were letters of some sort, and the letters surrounded a black and white emblem. "Mister Hilligans, could you open that case please?"  
  
The old coach driver went to open the case, but his hand paused over the latch. He pulled his hand back slowly; as if he were afraid it would explode at any sudden movement. "Laddie . . ." he said warningly, "I ain't touchin' tha'un. Thy 'ave strange magick in tha'un, an' I ain't touchin' it."  
  
"Not even if I tell you what kind it is?" Clow smiled hopefully, "We won't be able to get the bags down otherwise."  
  
Hilligans sighed and nodded his consent, he eyed the bag suspiciously as Clow explained, "It's Chinese magic. Mostly incantations and Ofuduo papers. There are some magicked objects, and a sensing board, that does nothing but show the location of magic objects. It's the Ofuduo papers I want, I will use them to float the bags down."  
  
"Chinese? Where'd thy get tha'?" He scowled harder at the old leather case.  
  
"My mother was a member of the Li clan."  
  
"Li clan?" Marcibay pulled his attention away from the bag long enough to look at Clow. "Wh'art th' Li clan?"  
  
"A very powerful family of Magicians in China." Clow smiled proudly, "my father was from a long line of powerful Warlocks, the Reed family of England. I'm the only known combination of the two magicks."  
  
"I know tha'un, I hear' o' thy Reed family," Hilligans began to undo the straps that held the faded grass green case. He threw the case to Clow, who caught it with a grin.  
  
"Really?" he asked excitedly. "Who told you about them?"  
  
Hilligans folded his arms, and looked dispassionately at him. "Me gram-ma . . ." he adjusted his cap and raised an eyebrow to emphasis his point. "She never shut up 'bout 'em. I got so sick o' hearin' about the wonderful Reed family;" he narrowed his eyes at Clow slightly, "I swore should I meet any o' their kinsmen, I'd knock 'is block off before 'e had chance to tell me everythin' gram-ma had already told me *ag'in.*"  
  
Clow laughed, as he understood Marcibay's point. From that day on, Clow never bragged about his family bloodlines again.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Should have probably mentioned this at the top, this is going to be a really, well, reasonably long story, I know because I've been writing the whole thing backwards, I mean chapters not words! I wrote the last scene first and things sorta . . . [makes 'water making way to the ocean' kinda motions with hands] progressed from there, shall we say? ^__^; And there might be spoilers in this if you don't already know the worst kept secret about Fujitaka and Eriol . . .and about Yue . . . or indeed anything about CCS . . . ahem, but I'm babbling, please feel free to babble back! Please R&R!! Oh, and Tadaima means 'I'm home' or something to that effect!! 


	3. Tasks and Experiments

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Two: Tasks and Experiments  
  
  
  
A few months later, the mansion was fully renovated, and incredibly Clow had done it all by himself, with the aid of magic of course. After he had fixed the house to his liking, the stairs now curled around each other, in a swirl, in the entrance hall, the light beach wood panelling had been switched to dark hard wood, and the fireplaces lit themselves now; Clow had placed the entire building and it's grounds under a very powerful spell. The spell held the property just out of the land's normal time, where a year passed for everyone else, a mere month passed for Clow, Hilligans and the Reed mansion. Hilligans agreed to live on the grounds and asked to take care of the immediate garden surrounding the mansion. A year passed as Clow became used to his life within the mansion, before he started to experiment with his magic. At first he created little things, small sprites that would do modest chores when asked, he charmed a quill to write whatever he said, and spent hours just dictating pure nonsense to the thing, simply because it would write and write away. Hilligans found spades working diligently at his potatoes patch, and when he yelled at them to work someplace else, "Damned charmed pixies! Get thee out o' me 'tato space!" they went to the next task of working diligently at the carrot patch. "Laddie! Stop charmin' me work tools!" was often yelled up into the air, much to Clow's amusement.  
  
Clow dug out his father's warlock robes, keen to look the part as well. After making some minor adjustments . . . "Laddie . . ." Marcibay eyed his robes once, "The symbols ain't thine own, and yellow most certainly ain't thy colour." . . . Clow had changed the yellow to a royal blue, and the dragon's head and the rose had been changed to a thin moon and half of the sun. Happy with the robes, Clow had decided against following family tradition of having a long wooden staff, with a thorny rose wrapping around it, and a dragon's head at the top, with a large crystal ball in the dragon's teeth. He created a small gilded wand for himself, which could be shrunk to the size of a key, for convenience's sake. It possessed the same slice of the moon and an extended sun. He laced a lot of magic with it, which would only respond to him, which was a good thing considering the move spirit that he had created. The small, invisible winged spirit was only capable of moving small things, and was highly irritating. It would often find his wand on his desk, and move it around very quickly. Clow had spent many an hour chasing after the wand, until he learnt that he had to stop and sense the spirit's next move. Yet Clow didn't have the heart to destroy it, he wished however that he had created some way of controlling it. Such was the case with many of the spirits he had created, the fifth and sixth floors of his mansion had been completely dedicated to the housing of these mischievous spirits, the ones that preferred to stay indoors would take over one of the many rooms; others, who preferred the outdoors, lived in the wilder parts of the grounds that lay just beyond Hilligans' much loved garden. Clow always walked down the corridors everyday to check on each of them. He'd stand in the doorway, and watch as the jump spirit and the floating spirit bounced objects around, or he'd watch the woody spirit grow an amazing jungle of increasing weird and wonderful trees, while the flower spirit, a beautiful spirit that took the form of a young girl, would display thousands upon thousands of exotic flowers. The spirit always dragged Clow into the room for a dance and to show him the latest of her displays. The flower spirit was one of his particular favourites, she was beautiful and would always be ready for a good time, but when he wanted to talk to her, place his hand against her cheek, her single mindedness would show through and she would repeat her magical display.  
  
Clow would often look at his creations and wish that he could actually talk to them, only a few had voices, like the singing spirit and the echo spirit. Both could talk or sing, but neither could hold a conversation. He had tried to create a spirit for pure light and accidentally created a spirit for pure darkness at the same time. While both these spirits could talk, they were only interested in talking to each other. Clow stared into the room that they inhabited, illumination and shadows swirled like oil and water shaken in a glass. Again the display beautiful, but single minded. He retired to his study, only to find the moving spirit had acquired the services of the floating card. The pair had combined to rearrange his entire study. He laughed as he stared up at the ceiling. "My, my," he muttered, "You have been busy."  
  
"T'ain't no laughin' matter, Laddie." Groused Hilligans, as the elderly man approached. He held the doubling spirits by the scuff of their necks in each hand. The two took the form a little girl and a little boy, both were identical except for their hair, one had pink, the other blue. Hilligans was dragging them to the study. "These two 'ave been at it again, now we 'ave *eight* horses . . . 'ow am I going t' care for *eight* horses?"  
  
"I'm sure that we have more than enough food and we can build the extra stables." Clow smiled. Hilligans held the pair up, "An' what are thee gonna do wit' these two? Laddie, thy really ought to figure out a way t' control these things that yer creatin'." Marcibay shook his head, "T'ain't no use if thy make 'em than leave 'em to their own devices."  
  
Clow stared at the two; he knew that Hilligans was right; the man was always completely practical in his advice. However he had created the spirits to be free and individual, he didn't want them to be the average warlock's familiar, he wanted them to be original, and couldn't bear the idea of putting restrictions on them. Hilligans sighed; he had come to know that Clow hated making anything suffer. "Laddie. . ." he said softly, "It doesn't 'ave to be painful to be controllin'," he suggested, "It can be like somewhere for them t' sleep, hibernatin' I think they call it. Sum'en like a box, or an orb . . . or . . ." Hilligans looked up at Clow's study ceiling, he spotted the old leather case. "Or sum'en as simple as them or- fuddy-doe cards, that ye have. Nowt painful."  
  
"Papers. . ." Clow corrected gently, "They're called Ofuduo papers . . ."  
  
"Whate'ver Laddie," Hilligans shook the two giggling spirits, "Jus' keep 'em away from me horses."  
  
  
  
Clow thought about what Hilligans had said, and had started to experiment with various methods of containment. First, he tried a box, but that didn't work because when he opened the box to retrieve one spirit, others would take the opportunity to escape. Next, he tried orbs, separate orbs for each of them. The glass orbs were no large than a marble when being carried, but would expand to fit the palm when taken out. While this was a reasonable method of keeping the spirits, and was very easy to use, it became increasing irritating to have to retrieve the glass ball once the job was done. He put a spell on the orb, to make it come back to him but after a while he grew intensely bored with it. Everyone did orbs of magic. It was accepted as the norm, and Clow was nothing if not an individual. He looked at his Ofuduo papers, Hilligans' last suggestion; the papers were flimsy and not exactly awe inspiring with their yellow and serious black Chinese characters. Clow sighed, and put the papers back. His creations would have to have a containment, but a containment that would do them justice.  
  
"What do you think, Mister Hilligans?" Clow put his hands behind his head as he thought his question to his coach driver. They were on their way to the nearest town, as Clow felt the need to get away from the mansion for a while, besides Hilligans wanted a new set of tools and he wasn't prepared to have Clow magick him some. "Laddie," Hilligans thought back, "Thy art the stronger magician; thy creations must be thy own."  
  
Clow stared out the window as they past the last gates of his property, the sight warped and stabilised as they pasted through the time barrier. "Besides," Hilligans continued as he pulled up the reins, "Thy 'ave the rest of thy life t' figure it out . . . thy mus'n't rush things like this, thy creations will out live thee."  
  
Clow yawned, "True, very true."  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Hmmm! I wonder what THOSE SPIRITS' containment might be?! Hmmm. . . Could it be--?  
  
DrM: shh! We don't want to spoil the surprise!  
  
Clow: surprise? Sheesh EVERYONE can see that it's going to be the Clow---  
  
DrM: [make Clow disappear to the next chapter] sheesh spoil my fun Clow! Please feel free to babble and tell me what you think! Please R&R!! 


	4. Tricksters and Illusions

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me! And all praise J.K. and Harry Potter. . . THANK YOU FOR THE TERM 'MUGGLES'!!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul. . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Three: Tricksters and Illusions  
  
  
  
[here's an apology to everyone who noticed the mistake! I gotta say I came down with a bit of the moron-ness, ya know the kind that affects you when you've got English coursework due the next day!! THIS is the right chapter. . . and I apologise again because it kinda takes the edge off the next one!! I'M SOOOOO SORRY!!!!]  
  
  
  
The town was busy, as they pulled into the stables. Bartering here and there, children playing, women and men selling their goods here and there. Very interesting thought Clow as he moved in between the stalls. The crowd was thick as he weaved his way through, Hilligans was just in front of him, and the two came to the town's square when Hilligans spotted the trader he wanted. "Laddie, don't get thee int' mischief." Hilligans sent the warning over his shoulder, as he moved away. Clow laughed aloud and stepped out of the way of a rickety wagon, as it moved between them. "Yes, *father*!" he thought/called back. He grinned when the old man turned back and scowled at him. Clow turned and went to explore the town and it's varied and interesting inhabitants. He came across a huddle of people, "Gather around! Gather closer! See the enchantment! That's right, folks! The unexplained!" Called a loud voice from the middle. "Hear ye! Hear ye! See the incredible! Anticipate the unexpected!"  
  
Somehow, Clow managed to get to the second row, at the edge. He was always intrigued by the Muggles' idea of magic. Today, there were two young men, one sat at a table, the other standing on a barrel. The one on the barrel was doing the yelling. "You'll be thrilled, you won't believe yer eyes, I tell yer!"  
  
"Get on with it!" Bellowed some large man in the back. Clow frowned slightly; the build-up made the trick worthwhile! The young man on the barrel was unfazed though and jumped down. "My friend here will show some tricks unseen by mankind. He will make the cards act alive; make them do things they were never meant to do!"  
  
The magic show was fairly good, and Clow enjoyed the way the Cardsman made them look like they were shuffling themselves. "Party tricks!" scoffed the large man again. He looked around the gather audience, and said, "I'd bet a child could pull off more amazing pranks with a cloth and a length of yarn!"  
  
"Very well, very well indeed!" the yelling man cried, "That may be true, but could a child turn a card into a living thing?"  
  
Murmurs spread, as the Cardsman stood, he lifted his hand to reveal a slightly elongated playing card trapped between his index and middle finger. He swivelled his hand to show the face of the card, the ace of spades. He smiled as, in an intensely quick motion of his hand, he held his arm away from his body. A pigeon had suddenly appeared and did one flying loop around the crowd before returning to perch on the Cardsman's index and middle finger. The crowd gasped and began to clap, Clow smiled broadly as he clapped as well, the trick was relatively uncomplicated, the Cardsman had simply thrust the card into his jacket and pulled out the bird in a motion quick than the audience could detect. However the effect was very well done, and Clow had to congratulate the two for their cunning.  
  
"And now . . ." the Cardsman's accomplice yelled above the applause, "See him restore the card to the appearance once it was meant to exist in!"  
  
Clow blinked, then a smile slowly formed on his lips, now this was something he would pay good money to see. It was one thing to hide the card and pull out the bird, but quite another to hide the bird, and pull out the card. The large man scoffed again, and loudly made some derogatory comments. While this distracted the audience, Clow manage to concentrate on the two younger men. He quickly realised that the large man was in on the act as well, as he was diverting the crowd; the two young men exchange the bird for a rather skilfully made stuffed one. Once that was done, the yelling accomplice yelled at the man, "Sir! You will have changed your tune once you see this!" This pulled the collected crowd's attention back to the show. Clow chuckled slightly, he hadn't suspected the large man, the gang were very crafty. The yelling man strutted around the small area between the crowd and the Cardsman, "It takes a lot of power to pull off this stunt, and I can't guarantee the card will want to go back . . . but hopefully our man will close it up properly." He nodded confidently, before quickly crouching by a little girl, "We hope . . ." he confided in the young child loudly.  
  
  
  
After the crowd began to disperse away, the cards man had successfully closed the card, he'd draped a large red cloth over the stuffed bird and, with some quick slight of hand, grabbed the toy bird and thrown it away with the cloth revealing nothing in his hand but, surprise, surprise, the ace of spades. Clow approached to two young men, noting the large man slipping away into the crowd. He smiled, "Very well done."  
  
"Thank yer guv'ner. . ." the accomplice bounced on his heels and grinned, "Yer could always show yer patronage through . . ." the man nudged a wooden basin with his foot.  
  
Clow smiled and dipped his hand into his pocket, and dug out a few gold pieces. He dropped them into the wooden bowl; "I must say the bird trick was very good." The young man grinned, before Clow continued, "But you might want to make the large man yell a bit louder, he failed to distract me when you were switching the birds." He smiled gently at their shocked faces. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."  
  
"Yer a right sharp one, guv'ner." The accomplice nodded, he smiled as he motioned Clow to sit down, "I'll bet you those coins that you won't spot another mistake."  
  
The cards man shuffled the elongated cards quickly and began to deal, as Clow took their challenge.  
  
  
  
The cards were old and faded, but were very study. They were larger than average playing card, and had a deep blue latticed back. They shuffled easily, and were still clearly marked. Clow held up the ace of spades, it was slightly dog-eared at the corners, no doubt from being repeated use in the bird act.  
  
"Where'd thee buy those tatty old things?" Hilligans threw his new tools into the coach's back box. Clow looked up from his recently won prize. He smiled and laughed as he showed them to Hilligans.  
  
"I won them, from two very crafty Muggle magicians."  
  
Hilligans eyed the dark haired boy as he started to shuffle the cards again, "Laddie, thy art a very strong real magician . . . did thee cheat these men?"  
  
"Mister Hilligans!" Clow looked at him, "I most certainly did not!" He stepped onto the coach and closed the door, leaning out the window he called, "Now are we going to get going or are you going to stand there all day, accusing me of fraud?"  
  
Marcibay shook his head and rolled his eyes. It was nearing dusk as their coach entered the dark forest surrounding the Reed Mansion. Clow was very quiet and thoughtful as he nearer his home. The pranksters' show still intrigued him. Their card tricks may have been very easy for a real magician, but he didn't think any magician had ever used cards to contain magic. Orbs, books, wands, staffs, and rings maybe. He'd even heard of cloaks, daggers, pendants, bottles, goblets, but never cards. He lifted the ace of spades again, and held it like the Cardsman had. As he stared at it, the card began to change colour, it's image was faded to another. He looked up, the carriage he was in faded away. All his life, his Uncle had told him, taught him everyday that that existence held no accidents, that all was pre-ordained, and that sometimes the future would show it's true self to him through the means of illusions of the mind. Clow turned in the darkness; the cards he held in his hands were suddenly contained in a book. The book exploded and the cards floated around him. A glow illuminated the darkness, and when he looked at his feet, a golden circle drew itself around quickly. A wind swept up around him, blowing his long hair loose of its dark blue tie. Simultaneously he saw a boy in robes similar to his own swing a large gold—a white winged angel draw an pale hand back, a cold blue orb formi—a red haired priestess holding a crescent moon bell, swinging it to give Saku--a green robed boy and a red and white robed girl, side by side, exchange a determined look as they prepared to figh—a large butterfly winged panther, draw breathe before firing his deadly ruby bea—a black haired woman, her robes exactly like his, tap her black and gold staff on the—a violet haired girl turning a strange object upon the moon and glimpsing the sight of Saku--a kind looking man looking up at a grey haired, emerald eyed girl who had just fallen from—a dark haired boy and his smiling friend exchanging barbs about having a sister compl—a crimson pink haired girl with butterfly wings laughing as she chase her brothe--a black hair angel, scrambling frantically, as green magic dragged him back towards a—a large friendly looking lion, bring him leaf after yellow leaf, not understanding that autumn did—a massive cruel looking dragon roaring before the flames rush out of it's--A young girl, with a cute pink hat and clock that was tied by a large yellow bow, holding a card, he couldn't see her eyes, but he knew they were kind, she smiled confidently as she passed the card over her heart, and threw her arm out like the Cardsman had. She spoke words that Clow couldn't hear, but knew by the movement of her lips it was something similar to something that he had heard before. The card spun away from her, around her until it spun in front of her, she pulled back her arms into the air and---  
  
"Laddie? Rouse thyself, we're 'ome." Hilligans rapped his old leather gloved fist against the glass as he passed to the back of the coach. Clow's eyes snapped open; he gasped as he jolted awake. He lifted his hand again, the card still held between his fingers. The vision already fading from his memory but was in someway clear. He couldn't remember what the card looked like exactly, but he knew it wasn't the faded blue playing card he held before him. He slipped the card once more into the pack, and knew he had found the containment for his spirits.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Just couldn't resist the urge to put some CCS phrases in there, could you?  
  
DrM: Shh!! Maybe they didn't notice! [Grins] just wait until they get to the other chapters, I just downloaded the opening songs for the second and the third series . . . and they are so cute! And I've been listening to them a lot!  
  
Clow: does this mean there are unbearably cute scenes coming up. . .?  
  
DrM: [nods]  
  
Clow: Ye Gods no! Please R&R!!  
  
____________________________  
  
Clow: [trying very hyard not to piss himself] I can't believe you did that!  
  
DrM:[hiding HUGE blush!] neither can I! Stupid coursework!!! It made me so brainless!! I can't believe it!!  
  
Clow: there there. . . I'm sure no one noticed!!  
  
Yue and Keroberos: WE DID!!!  
  
Blue goo: so did I!!  
  
Clow: yes well. . . I wouldn't yell it too loudly considering DrM here is the author and she can write you out of existence!  
  
DrM: yeah! think about it!  
  
Blue goo: then who will point out her silly little mistakes? And agree with her when she calls herself an idiot?  
  
DrM: I'll stop writing!  
  
Blue goo: I'll be good! 


	5. Incantations and Visions

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul. . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part four: Incantations and Visions  
  
  
  
Clow spent the next days in his study; he'd decided that his spirits were going to be contained in the playing cards that he had won from the pranksters. However, he wanted to do the spell right before he contained the spirits. He decided that the cards would act like the Chinese papers, they would need an incantation to open them, and for use. He tried to remember the vision he had had in his carriage. The people he saw he knew were a mixture of his future, people that he was going to meet and creatures he was going to create. The girl, the young girl with the pink hat and the cloak held on by a yellow bow, was the most vivid, but even her features weren't precise. He knew that when he saw her, which he had no doubt he would, he would recognise her. The next vivid memory was of the cards, and the magic circle that had drawn itself under his feet. He could remember that he had seen the symbols he had chosen for his robes. The sun was complete, and in the centre of the circle, and that the moon was in orbit of that sun. It was beautiful; it contained aspects from both the spheres of magic he had been born into. He knew that was something he would see again in his lifetime. He sat in the window seat. His robes' outer coat was slung over the desk's chair and he slouched with his back hard against the window seat's frame. He stared out the window, thoughtfully.  
  
"Move . . ." he lifted his hand into the air, "Bring my wand to me, please."  
  
The spirit floated the wand over to Clow's hand and dropped it into his palm. "Thank you," he murmured, still staring out the window. He sighed heavily, as he leaned his head back, "I didn't know making incantations up would be so difficult." He admitted to the spirit. "Bring me the cards please."  
  
As the pack floated card by card to him, Clow slipped his feet on to the floor and stood. He stepped into the middle of the room and paused thoughtfully. The move spirit didn't know where to put the cards, since Clow had his wand in one hand and was scratching his chin with the other. It settled instead for floating the cards around him in an orbit. A pang of déjà vu made Clow glance up. The cards were circling him like they had been in his dream. He drew his wand up, and stared at it. The image of the blue haired boy with the gilded staff came to him again; this time though, the boy was sitting in one of Clow's favourite chairs, he held his staff in front of him. Clow realised that his wand was similar only smaller. The boy smiled, and held the staff on its side in front of him. He let it go and it glowed and shrunk in size. It became the small key-size wand that Clow had created his wand to do as well. The boy smiled again and pocketed the tiny gold key. Clow blinked, and became aware of his study once more. He realised that the wand he had created might not be up to the task that was before him. He returned it to its key size, and held it up by its lace. His eyes slid shut as he let it go, knowing it would be hovering just in front of him. "O, key of magic. I, Clow Reed, command thee under our contract, reveal the staff to me."  
  
Clow smiled as he open his eyes, he could feel the magic flow around him, the supernatural wind from his vision blew around him, and when he glance down at his feet he saw the magic circle. The movement in front of him made him look up again; his staff was growing in front of him. Awed, it took him a couple of seconds to realise he was meant to grab it. The light was almost blinding as he pushed himself forward. As Clow grabbed the staff with both hands, the mystical tempest slowed and died away. Clow knew now what the incantation was going to be. He still couldn't remember what the girl had said, but he knew where the feeling, that he had heard the words, had come from. The market, the pranksters. He was meant to use the trickster's words, he was sure of it.  
  
"Move spirit." He commanded, he took a deep breathe, "Thy will have a new form. Close thyself in the card!" He said sternly, and struck his staff against the spirit. His staff flew straight through it, and the spirit continued to drift there nonchalantly. "Hmmm. . ." Clow raised an eyebrow. "So that didn't work . . ." he looked from the spirit to a nearby card. "Attach yourself to the card?" He shrugged, "No. . . I command thee . . ." he paced away slowly, "I command thee . . ."  
  
Clow Reed was unaware that below him the magic circle was forming again, and the magic-laced wind was stirring under his every foot step, "I command thee . . . Seal yourself . . .Seal thyself in the form I have chosen . . . I, Clow Reed, have. . . so commanded?" The circle disappeared, and the wind dissipated again, the words were almost right, but the last command was wrong. "No. . ." Clow turned and walked back to the floating cards and the drifting move spirit. "I command thee . . . Seal thyself . . . In the form I have chosen . . ." the magic began to appear again as he paused. He was on the verge of it, the forces knew it, and the spirit felt itself being pulled towards one of the old playing cards. Clow blinked, the girl with the pink hat and the cloak was back again, she repeated her motion, pulled back her arms and. . .  
  
Clow blinked in surprise as the vision faded again, he drew his staff back, "I command thee, Move spirit. . . Seal thyself in the form I have chosen . . ." he swung the staff toward the spirit, as one of the cards glowed and disappeared. " . . .CLOW CARD!"  
  
The magic exploded, as the spirit struggled briefly, the winds grappling with it and dragging it toward the point where Clow's staff had struck. Bright magic ripples expanded from the card, as it came into existence, and the wind blew hard, stands of Clow's hair whipped about his face. Then it stopped. Just stopped, the circle faded, the wind dissipated, and the new card floated in front of him, before it drifted towards him. He reached out tentatively to pluck it out of the air. A warm feeling washed over him, as his fingers made contact with the new card. The spirit's visible form was now a picture, the words 'The Move' was written in English on a small gold banner below it, on top of the banner was a crescent moon, and at the top of the card was a sun with Chinese lettering, again meaning 'The Move'. He turned it over; his magic circle was gold and black on a crimson background. Clow smiled as he held the card as he had the ace of spades, his study door blew open.  
  
"LADDIE!!" Yelled Hilligans as he stumbled through the door, "What the hell did you just do?! I just felt the most powerful wave o' magic me witchin' bones e'er encounter'd!"  
  
Clow held the card towards Hilligans, "I've just created a new type of magic, Mister Hilligans . . ." the dark haired magician, smiled lopsidedly, as his face grew paler, "I think I might call them . . ." Clow's eyes barely focused on his long time friend, "Clow Cards . . ."  
  
Hilligans didn't have much time to admire the handsome crimson card, as the young magician pitched forward. The creation of this new magic had drained him. Clow's gilded staff clattered to the floor, glowed and returned to it's key form, and the new card hovered of the unconscious body of it's new master.  
  
  
  
Yet another year passed as Clow sealed the creatures he had created into the old playing cards, few things changed about them, aside from names (like the doubling spirits became the better-named 'The Twin') and all the cards went peacefully into their new forms. For this, he was grateful as it allowed him to concentrate on more important things. Like the visions. The first one he had, the one the day he first decided to create the Cards, that one had never returned. The visions since seemed like only fragments of the first. He couldn't explain it, and tried desperately to remember the full vision. He knew he had seen several people, the young girl, with the pink hat and the cloak tied with the bow and the boy with the blue hair, at first he thought the blue haired boy was his child, a future son, but Clow didn't think so. The boy seemed too . . . too . . .  
  
"Too . . . much like me . . .?" Clow shook his head, and turned away from his study's window. The autumn was in full bloom, and the leaves fell from the trees in droves. His thoughts turned to the angels, the butterfly girl, the dragon and the large cats he had seen, who were they? They were beings of magic, that was certain, but were they all his creations? All but two had been attacking something, the girl was happily chasing something, the white haired angel was drawing his hand back in preparation, the dragon and the blue . . . //or was it black?// panther was breathing some sort of . . . fire. The only two that hadn't been attacking was the playful lion that didn't understand autumn, and the black hair angel who was trying to escape from . . . from . . .  
  
"From . . . what?" Clow murmured. He couldn't remember their faces, only the most outstanding features. The escaping angel had black hair, shiny black hair. And his magic, the magic that was dragging him back was . . . jade green, not a pure green, but a jaded green. Clow shook his head again, and turned his attention on the cards. He had thirty of the old playing cards left, he picked them up and walked over to the window again, what kind of cards would be useful to him now?  
  
  
  
Three months later and Clow had four cards left. His magic had become very strong; he could create several cards at once, with sometimes as much as a flick of his wrist. On the way back from the market place, Hilligans decided to ask Clow what he planed to do with the last four cards.  
  
"What do you mean?" Clow looked up from his book, as Hilligans' question was tentatively posed, unusual for the old man.  
  
"Laddie . . . these four will be thy last cards, they will 'ave the strongest magic in 'em." Hilligans said grimly, he was worried about Clow's choice, Clow could feel it. He was trying to hide it, but it still seeped through.  
  
"You're right . . ." Clow became very quiet and contemplative as the night crept over the land. Hilligans' warning was sincere, and true, these four would be his last. He pulled them out of his coat pocket. Clow kept them with him lately because he never knew when he'd make his decision. The four cards were the four kings, the King of Hearts, the King of Clubs, the King of Diamonds, and the King of Spades. The four rulers of the cards. //Four rulers? // Clow glanced up; he reached into his robes again and pulled out his Chinese magic papers. They were elementals; the Elements, in Chinese folklore, control the way life was run. Wind, fire, water and lightning. Clow frowned; he had already created a thunder card.  
  
"Laddie?" Hilligans called to him, Clow instantly snapped out of his thoughts. Soothing himself with a few whispered incantations, and the odd curse, he thought back smoothly, "Yes, Mister Hilligans?"  
  
"Can thee use that light card o' yours? I canne see a thing, let alone the horses!"  
  
Clow smiled as he leaned out the window, "Certainly!" He called up aloud; he pulled the light card out of his robes, "Light, show us the path," he flicked the card forward. As it flew forward, he opened the door and stood on the step. As the card came flying back on the wind, he pulled out his staff, "RELEASE!" He yelled as he activated the sealed spirit.  
  
Hilligans smiled and nodded his thanks as Clow stepped back into his carriage. "Now where was I?" He muttered as he sat back down. As he got comfortable again, he crossed his legs, and it was then Clow noticed the mud that was splattered on his robes. "Damn," he muttered as he pulled out the bubbles card he had created for just such an occurrence . . . well, that and he just hated washing his own clothes. Thankfully it was just a bit of earth, so it would come out easily. He settled back again as the Bubble spirit cheerfully cleaned his mud splattered robes.  
  
"If I can't use lightning as one of the ruling cards . . ." he theorised aloud, "what would be an adequate replacement? I have the Wind . . ." he held up the king of hearts, "She will be a gentle card, a card that will care and provide the love for the cards . . ." he threw the card on to the seat opposite, "I have the Fire . . ." he held up the King of Diamonds, "She will be the passionate card, a strong and fearsome card . . ." that card followed it's predecessor, "I have the Water . . ." he held up the King of Clubs, "She will be the strongest attack card after Fire, and aggressive in her protection . . ." after he threw this card onto the faded red seat opposite him, he held up the King of Spades, "But the King of Spades is the strongest playing card. . . the last card will have to be the strongest, she will be the over all ruler of the cards. . ." he turned the card, clamped between his index and middle finger, "Hmmmm. . . The last card."  
  
The patter of rain against the window drew his attentions from his musings. "Mister Hilligans? Why didn't you tell me it was raining?"  
  
The gruff reply sounded in his mind, "I've never minded a bit of rain, 'sides it's good for the garden, the Earth needs it . . . she's a tough ol' piece o' dirt, but she's need a drink like the rest o' us."  
  
"I'm sure she does . . ." Clow settled back in his seat, "but I'd rather you didn't catch a cold."  
  
"Aye, but what can we do about it?" Clow chuckled quietly, Hilligans was being stubborn again; he knew exactly what Clow could do about it.  
  
  
  
Their journey continued, despite the pelting rain, Clow had pulled out his rain card and told it to ward the rain off Hilligans. The old man gruffly told Clow off for ". . .Wasting perfectly good magick on a pointless endeavour, thy should be savin' thy magick for good reasons Laddie, not for everyday tasks. . . yer can't fight the inevitable, if I was gonna get wet; then I was gonna get wet, no doubt about it, Laddie. . ."  
  
Clow smiled and shook his head as Hilligans continued; the old man couldn't stand it when Clow used his magic to benefit himself or his closest friend, and told him so under no uncertain terms. He tuned the old man out, and settled back to concentrate on the thoughts that he had been entertaining before the rain started. "Hmmmm. . . Come here . . ." he beckoned the cards over, the three that had been tossed over to the other red coach seat hovered and flew straight to his hand. He no longer needed the move spirit to do that for him, but he liked to keep it, as a reminder of his first Clow card.  
  
He added the fourth card and the four faded kings floated in front of him, he pointed at each slowly, the king of hearts ". . .Wind . . .", he pointed at the next, the King of Clubs, " . . . Water . . .", the next, the King of Diamonds, " . . . Fire . . .", he paused as he came to the last card, the King of Spades, the strongest suit. The card's property was on the tip of his tongue, he could feel it. He stare at the card, hoping something would trigger the name. Clow frowned and started again, "The Wind . . ."  
  
The rain lingered in the air, sounds became extended. He could feel the carriage become slowed, turning his head, Clow could see each raindrop falling, the hard rain had decelerated to an almost stop. He turned his head to look out the other window and realised that he was experiencing another vision. He turned back to the four cards that were now spinning in front of him, there wasn't an explosion, but the other cards seemed to be thrown from these other cards and spun around him in their usual orbit. Clow found himself standing in the centre of his magic circle, as he turned slowly in a circle each of the cards stopped spinning showing their faces to him, as he came to the last card he had created, the Mirror, he found he had turned full circle and the last four cards were in front of him again. The other cards flew into a book, that he couldn't see but knew was there. The four remaining cards positioned themselves at the north, south, and east and west of him. The gilded staff materialised in his hands, and he was suddenly aware that he wasn't in control of his body. He watched as he turned south and struck the King of Hearts, a woman, a beautiful, soft, pale yellow woman ascended from the card, her eyes were shut for a few seconds before they snapped open, and she spread her wings. She flew straight at him, and through. He spun and struck the card at the east, the King of Diamonds, again a being ascended from the card, she spun slightly as she appeared, drawing her wings back to reveal, a confident, flame haired young woman, again the being flew at him, he spun again and struck the card at the west, the King of Clubs, another woman, this time slightly younger than the fire woman, ascended from the card. She threw up her head, and bared her fangs as she rushed towards Clow at a frightening speed. He wasn't afraid of her, knowing she would just pass through him. He spun and struck the last card. The woman that ascended was the oldest looking, and the most powerful, he could feel it; she held her hands in front of her patiently. When she had reached the top of her ascension, her head tilted back slightly, her head still closed. They opened as her head fell forward again, and she regarded him with a regal look. Time stopped even within this vision, as Clow memorised everything about the green woman, her sisters gathered behind her, all staring down at him expectantly, before the last card spread her arms, the other copying her one by one. They all dived at him; the last card's green eyes were the last things he saw, as the wave of the most powerful cards of his pack came crashing towards him.  
  
Clow gasped, as his vision stopped abruptly, his carriage jolting slightly as it passed through the time barrier. It took him a few seconds to realise he was back in the carriage, and not in the dreamscape, he took deep breathes to calm himself as he stared out the window.  
  
Once he felt sufficiently in control, he looked back at the four cards that were still floating in front of him. Confident now, he lifted his finger and pointed at each card.  
  
"The Windy . . . the Firey . . . the Watery . . ." he paused as his finger came to the last card, the woman's powerful green eyes still fresh in his mind, a smile twitched at his lips, "And the last card . . . The Earthy."  
  
  
  
It was near midnight when they arrived at the large oak doors of the Reed Mansion, Hilligans hopped off the front of the coach and rapped his gloved fist against the window, in his habituated way. "Laddie? Rouse thyself, we're 'ome." He paused outside the door, his witchin' bones were giving him a chill. He stepped back to the coach's door and opened it. Clow was staring at the last four cards of the old playing pack he had won from the town tricksters, a slight smile tugging at his lips. "Thy 'ave made thy decision . . ." Hilligans said quietly, ". . . 'Aven't thee, Laddie?"  
  
Clow didn't take his eyes off the four cards before him as he answered in a hushed, calm voice, "Yes, Mister Hilligans . . ." Clow smiled as he nodded, "I have indeed."  
  
Marcibay had feared that the boy would be rushed in his decision, that he'd make a choice that he would regret later, but now . . . looking at the young, powerful magician, Marcibay could see in the lad's face, that the choice he had made was wise, and would never be regretted. Hilligans allowed a small smile to lighten his face; he nodded with a deep sureness, and clapped a leather gloved hand heavily on Clow's arm. "It's the right one, Laddie . . ." he murmured softly.  
  
Clow turned his head, and stared down on the brown leather gloved hand. It was rare that the gruff old man touched Clow. He looked up at the worn, mature face of the good man, who was never afraid to put Clow in his place, never minding that Clow could probably erase him from existence with the bat of an eyelid. The man had kept Clow grounded in reality, never letting him take refuge in his family name, nor abuse his powers . . . he'd kept his promise, he hadn't let Clow get himself into mischief. Clow gazed warmly at Marcibay Hilligans and placed his hand on Hilligans'. He squeezed gently, knowing the gesture was communicating his gratefulness for Marcibay's belief in him. Marcibay's clear eyes glinted, "Indeed," he whispered. "It's the right one."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: I see a Mary Sue on the horizon!  
  
DrM: you're so mean to me!  
  
Clow: I'm mean to you?! You are writing about me! I'm entitled to be mean to you!  
  
DrM: you're so mean! Just for that I'll tell the readers to go to www.picupload.com  
  
Clow: why?  
  
DrM: cos I've put up some fan art, and if they'd like to see what I think the evil dude from the first chapter looks like then all they need to do is type in DrMegalomania [don't leave a space!] and then it should take them straight to pics of you and the evil dude and the evil woman from this fic's sequel! Yeah! Think about it!  
  
Clow: was that a blatant advert or was that a blatant advert? I'll let you, the readers, decide! Please R&R!! 


	6. Trust and Fear

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul. . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part five: Trust and Fear  
  
  
  
Clow felt nervous as he stepped up the curling stairs to the third floor. As always he was going to create the cards in his study, every single card had been born there and these last four wouldn't be any different. He paused, his pale white hand clamped on the railing. //What if I can't do it? What if it goes wrong? What if I can't do it? //  
  
"Laddie!" Hilligans called his reprimand both aloud and in Clow's mind. Clow's head snapped up, and he looked down at the entrance hall's ground, Hilligans stood in the centre of the shiny wood flooring. Clow's magic circle had recently been added to the floor, and Hilligans stood in the centre of the gold leafed groves. Clow doubted Hilligans had chosen the position on purpose.  
  
He blinked, he was suddenly aware that he was trembling. He swallowed then called down at the gruff coachman, "What if I can't do it, Mister Hilligans?"  
  
Hilligans stepped forward one step, "Who will, then, Laddie? Eh? Who will complete thy cards?" Clow broke first and looked away from the stern gaze. "ANSWER me, Laddie! Who will complete thy cards for thee?  
  
Clow swallowed again, "If I can't . . ."  
  
"If thy can't, then find thee another profession!" Hilligans spat. "Because Laddie, I warn thee!" He shook a gloved finger at him, "If thy don't 'ave the courage to complete the cards, then thy cards, thy life, thy magic . . . thy *SOUL* will desert thee!" Clow forced himself to look at the man below him, as he continued his reproach. "Who will complete the cards THEN? Thy art Clow Reed, there is *NO* other in this life that can declare they 'ave same magic as thee." The old man was silent for a moment as he allowed his point to sink in; "Laddie, I ask thee . . ." he said quietly, either in his mind or aloud, Clow couldn't tell, "Who will complete the cards? If the answer ain't thyself . . . oh, Laddie, go jump off roof now." Clow's trembling stopped, at the suggestion; he swallowed again, as Hilligans walked away from him. "Because the *hell* you'll give thyself for the rest of eternity would be *infinitely* worse . . ."  
  
The old oak door slammed shut with a resounding echo, as Hilligans left Clow standing on the curling stairs. His hand was still clutching the railing for support. He breathed deeply, not knowing quite what was causing him feel so troubled. He glanced up at the top of the stairs, a turning right, past six doors, and on your left, his study lay. His study, which would be the birthplace of four of the most powerful cards. He glanced down at the engraved, golden circle where Hilligans had stood.  
  
There, Hilligans had suggested that Clow would find death a better alternative to not finishing the cards because he was too scared. Clow turned and put both hands on the dark railing. He realised he was precisely halfway between the third floor and the first. He could retreat down the stairs, admit that he couldn't, *wouldn't* finish the cards for fear of failure . . . Clow turned his head upward. "Or I can step up to the challenge . . ." he frowned worriedly as he considered his options. "To ascend or descend . . . to live my life in the knowledge that I never failed because I never tried . . . or to try . . . and fail, or succeed but still know that I tried . . ."  
  
He turned away from the third floor; his foot hovered over the step below. He hesitated and pulled it back as if it was burning. He turned, and lifted his foot to step up but the sudden thought, //What if I can't do this?// made him stamp his foot back on to the stair he was trapped on. He closed his eyes, hoping that a vision would come, come and make his decision *for* him. Show him the blue haired boy standing, beaming triumphantly, at the top, or maybe the young girl, with the pink hat and the cloak, smiling confidently as she held the four cards in her pale yellow gloves. His shoulders drooped as he realised the future was not going to help him with this decision.  
  
His eyes were still shut as he murmured to himself, "What are you going to do now, Reed?" He knew Hilligans was right, Clow was the only one that could complete the cards . . . but it seemed such a huge task, beyond him almost. He squeezed his eyes shut, and willed himself not to cry like some panicked child, facing his first teacher for his grade. It was then he felt the budge, a small push against his back. His eyes snapped open; there was a small sharp push against his back again. It was trying to force him up the stairs. He looked up; his cards were orbiting him again. He looked around to see which one was pushing him. The Move card floated into view, and pushed itself against his shoulder. The card was a weak one, and was only capable of moving small inanimate objects, but it was trying it's hardest to force Clow Reed, one of the most powerful Magicians in the world, up the stairs.  
  
He smiled at it, and murmured, "You think I can do it . . ." The card moved back to the gap that the other cards left for it, he turned in a circle to look at each of them, " . . .You all do . . . don't you?"  
  
The Move card was the first to show it's response, it began to glow, and the golden glow spread to the other cards, they hovered closer to him, and he could feel their magical warmth. He closed his eyes and absorbed their tender, trusting love, Clow could feel himself blushing.  
  
"See Laddie?" Hilligans stood just three steps down from Clow, his harsh voice from before was gone, replaced by a knowing, soft tone. "They trust thee . . . an' I trust thee . . ." he walked up and past Clow, and paused five steps ahead of the young magician. He sniffled and looked down at him dispassionately, "Now come along an' stop this airy-fairy, carin' business . . ." he turned away, starting to walk again, "Thy 'ave work t' do Laddie, an' ain't no one else gonna do it for thee."  
  
Clow paused, and looked up. Hilligans was at the top of the stairs, arms folded and a gruff but expectant look on his face. Before his mind had time to think of the self doubting thought again, he felt the move card ramming itself into his back, "Okay," he smiled as the cards glowed, "Okay, okay . . ." he began to laugh as the cards pushed themselves against his back and under his arms, determined to get him up to the top.  
  
"Okay!" He laughed happily, "Okay, okay, *okay*! I'm going!" He said as he stepped up the stairs towards his study. "Arghaaa!" He sniggered as the cards forced him into a run. "I said I was going!"  
  
Once he was at the top, the cards stopped their pushing. He paused again and turned back to them, "Thank you . . ." he bowed slightly, as the other cards piled themselves orderly on a near-by table, effectively saying that they would wait there until he was done, the Move card floated closer. Clow smiled, and pressed two fingers against the surface of the card. His first card bobbed slightly, drifting like it would in it's true form. As he dropped his fingers, the card floated closer and pushed itself against his shoulder, nudging him to go. He nodded to it, turn and precede to follow Hilligans to his study, aware that the card remained floating in the corridor, for a few seconds longer before shuffling itself into it's place in the pack.  
  
  
  
Clow walked along the corridor, he smiled at Hilligans who stood in the open door way of his study . . . or at least that's what he had thought.  
  
Clow stopped, as Hilligans faded and was replaced, the corridor faded and was replaced . . . replaced by . . .  
  
"A vision?" Clow wondered, "Why now?" this vision wasn't like the others, it wasn't a fragment of any that he'd seen before . . .a snowflake, a single, white pure snowflake floated in front of him, he was just about to touch it when a sob from behind him made him turn quickly, the cheerful lion stood under a window, at the end of a corridor, one Clow knew was on the floor above. But the lion was growling at him, something, some*one* was clinging to his neck, sobbing. The light was coming from the wrong direction for Clow to see if it was a white haired or a black haired child. Clow suddenly wondered why he was so certain it was either of those . . .another snowflake floated and danced impossibly in front of him, it blew over his shoulder. Clow turned, where Hilligans had been standing, a thin dark figure now stood, and his features so completely hidden in the shadows. First the figure raised one hand, it held clumps of white mane, fine like a horse's, and Clow assumed it was from the lion's fine tail . . . then the figure raise his other hand, some sort of glinting blade grasped firmly in the bone white fingers. Clow's eyes widened in horror as the being tilted his head back and proceeded to slit his own, deathly pale thro- --  
  
"Laddie?! Laddie?! Are you all right?!" Clow sat up with a sob caught in his throat. He pressed his hands against his mouth to bit back the wave of nausea. "Breathe slowly, Laddie!" Hilligans snapped concerned, he rubbed Clow's back in soothing circles. "Slowly," he murmured, "Slowly." The boy was as white as a sheet, as if he'd seen some sort of ghost. Hilligans was aware that Clow saw things, but he said they were like inspiring, reassuring, warm memories . . . this one obviously wasn't anything close to warm, reassuring or inspiring. Clow was shaking worse that he had been on the stairs earlier, and tears were streaking unchecked down his face. It was the first and last time that Marcibay Hilligans would see Clow cry . . . but it wasn't the last time Clow Reed would ever cry.  
  
  
  
Hilligans had guided Clow to the kitchen, and sat him down. He wrapped a warm blanket around the boy's shoulders. He kept looking at the door, as if he expected whatever he had seen suddenly jump out on him, he had actually yelped when his cards floated in, full of concern for their boy master who had suddenly collapsed without reason. They were a part of his soul and were in some aware of what he had seen, but there was no way they could have interpreted it. Clow trembled, and shook so violently, Hilligans could actually hear his teeth chattering. Marcibay sighed, what the boy had seen had shaken him, shaken him to the core . . . he shushed the cards away, and sat besides Clow on the old bench. The boy was clenching and unclenching his fists, trying hard to calm down, trying desperately to hold in the tears, but that only made it worst.  
  
Hilligans wrapped an arm around his back, and then one around his front, the boy resisted at first, stuttering something resembling, "I don't need . . ." but when he brought his head up and Hilligans meet his eyes with compassion, Clow broke. He broke down, and sobbed, and screamed, and shook, and shuddered, and did this until he could cry no more, until he fell into a fitful sleep, marred with dreams of cold silver blades and bone white skin, everything splattered with crimson red blood.  
  
Hilligans sat for a full three hours, just rocking the boy gently; he wondered what the boy had seen. He rested his chin on the shiny, long black hair and was just dozing off when the cards suddenly burst out of the pack they had been resting in. They placed themselves on the table and began to shuffle themselves simply, they cut the deck, once, twice, three times, then three cards flipped out in front of him.  
  
"Away with thy shenanigans . . . I've no time for thy games now."  
  
The cards were insistent, and glowed, the three in front of him floated in front of his weather worn face. Hilligans sighed, then muttered a quiet curse, "Aye . . . I'll listen."  
  
Their message was fairly simple to understand. The move was the first card, they wanted to move him. Sleep the next; they wanted him to have a proper sleep. "Thy want me t' move him somewhere where he can sleep, aye . . ."  
  
The last card was the Power, they were offering him the strength to carry their master, "Thy realise that thy master would be mighty angry with thee for offerin' thy services without his consent?"  
  
The card twirled and shuffled again, again three cards floated in front of him. Their simplistic message easy for him to read. The Dream card was the first, they were concerned about his dreams . . . it floated under a card that was revealed to be the Dark card, which glowed and then fell to the table lifeless. They didn't like his bad dreams . . . the Dream card floated under the Sweet card now. "Aye . . . I wish for him to 'ave sweet dreams too."  
  
The cards gathered and the power card spun out again, Hilligans glanced from the card to the snoozing magician on his shoulder, back to the cards again, "I guess I could make an exception t'night . . . so what do I do?"  
  
  
  
The next morning, the sunlight streamed in though the window, onto the four- poster bed. Clow frowned in his sleep; he always made sure the curtains were shut last thing at night, why was sunlight pouring into his room?  
  
He groaned and rolled over, allowing his back to be warmed by the midday rays . . . //Midday?!// Clow's sleepy mind wondered, // Mister Hilligans *never* lets me sleep in that late . . .//  
  
It was true that the gruff old coach driver was always up at the crack of dawn and made sure Clow never slept past breakfast's last call. In all truthfulness, that was the real reason both the dash card and the fly card had been created, Clow wasn't an early morning type of person, in his early teens he considered it a crime against humanity to be awake *before* twelve o'clock. But that was probably because his uncle always woke him in his youth as the first few rays of sunlight was slipping over the horizon, cutting into the night's last stand like a sharp gleaming blade—  
  
"NO!" Clow sat up suddenly. He felt the tears welling up again and willed them away.  
  
"So . . . you're awake, Laddie." Hilligans sat forward in his arm chair, "For a while there I thought you were going to sleep all day and miss lunch altogether." the craggy old man pushed himself up and out of the chair, and walked over to Clow's desk. There was a tray with a steaming teapot and a small lunch.  
  
Clow sat up very straight, his pale hands clenched tightly, resting in his lap. The scarlet quilts served only to make the boy seem paler. His dark hair fell loosely around his shoulders, and he was staring very hard at the end of the bed.  
  
"What is it Laddie?" Hilligans poured a cup of tea for the boy, Clow looked resolved, and maybe a slight bit ashamed.  
  
"I'm sorry." Clow said quietly, he looked up at Hilligans who was bringing him a cup of tea.  
  
"Sorry for what?"  
  
Clow was silent for a few seconds, and then he looked at the end of the bed. Hilligans sat on the bed; he had a feeling he knew. He handed the young magician the china cup and saucer. "Tha' I had t' comfort thee. . .?"  
  
Clow's shoulders drooped and he stared mutely into the teacup. He nodded quietly.  
  
"Laddie . . ." Hilligans smiled slightly, "Thy art human, and I 'ave no doubt that whate'er thee saw would take the sturdiest man and make him weep as well. Now, drink thy tea . . . I 'ave work to do, an' so do thee . . . no doubt that thy will be plannin' thy last four cards today."  
  
When Clow still didn't reply, still didn't raise his head from his tea gazing, Hilligans sighed and stood. He walked over to the bedroom door, "There's a small lunch for thee . . . thy Clow cards 'ave been hasslin' me th' 'hole time, so I want thee t' make an appearance for dinner tonight."  
  
Clow nodded quietly. Hilligans shook his head, and closed the door silently; he was half way down the stairs when he heard Clow's voice in his mind.  
  
//Thank you Mister Hilligans . . . expect me down at six o'clock sharp.//  
  
Hilligans chuckled, and muttered both back through his mind, and aloud.  
  
"Cheeky little beggar."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Is it just my imagination or is this fic longer than usual?  
  
DrM: It's not your imagination . . .  
  
Clow: Good . . . [smiles and then grabs DrM by the collar] You said I'd be gettin' it on with someone!  
  
DrM: Now that's your imagination!  
  
Yue: [looks broken] But! But! But! You said!!  
  
DrM: I know I did, I'm just messing with Clow's mind . . . anyway . . . be patient, the person he's getting it on with isn't there yet!  
  
Hilligans: [puts away bondage stuff] Ooooohhh!  
  
DrM: [covers eyes] Ewwww!! @___@;  
  
Clow: now that was . . . I dunno what that was!! All I can say is that the next updating gonna get this ficcy bumped up to nc-17 . . . or 'R' whichever is the rating above 13! Mostly for the swearing . . . it's a couple of chappies after that I get to . . . [DrM covers his mouth]  
  
DrM: Who died and made you author?! ¬_¬  
  
Clow: You did . . . because I kill you now!!  
  
DrM: PLEASE R&R!! [Looks at axe-wheedling Clow and runs away] AHHHHHHH!!! SAVE ME!! 


	7. Creations

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul. . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Six: Creations  
  
  
  
Today was *the* day.  
  
Clow stood outside his study as if he was waiting to be called in. he raised his hand to the dark wood door, and pressed lightly, he was going to go in *now*.  
  
Clow pulled his hand back as if burnt, "Or maybe later . . ." he murmured, he walked a few steps away from the door.  
  
"Was 'e like this when 'e made thee?" Hilligans was leant against the wall a dozen doors away. He was talking to the Move card, who like its sibling cards, was floating patiently with the coachman. They had watch Clow walk up to the door, pause and turn away for the last hour now.  
  
The card turned itself upside down, which had become the card's sign for 'no'. Hilligans and the cards had developed their own little language over the three weeks since Clow had had his first truly disturbing vision. Clow refused to talk about it, but Hilligans believed it had something to do with knives, because he had found Clow once in the kitchen staring thoughtfully at a large bread knife. He was shaking his head, muttering something that sounded like, "It wasn't this, it had two blades . . . or did it . . .?"  
  
Clow hadn't had another vision like it since, and was puzzled by it. But Marcibay knew Clow, if anything the now eighteen year-old magician loved puzzles, he's created a maze card for that sole purpose, so he could go rambling for hours on end, just looking for the exit. Hilligans never joined Clow on such excursions because . . . as Clow had so cheerfully enthused, it would take them *days* to find their way out.  
  
Hilligans sighed as Clow walked up to his study door again; the magician didn't even put his hand on the door this time before turning away. The poor boy was a bundle of nerves. He'd woken up today, and quite enthusiastically informed Hilligans that "Today is *the* day!"  
  
Hilligans had looked up from his porridge, and eyed Clow suspiciously, "Day for what, Laddie?"  
  
"Today . . ." Clow leant on the heavy wooden table, "Today, my cards are to be complete."  
  
Although excited by the prospect, the implications of the act of creating the last cards soon sunk in. soon, Clow Reed, the most powerful magician of both the Eastern and the Western Spheres of magic, would be in possession of the completed set of Clow Cards. Cards that were beyond the imagination of many wizards, warlocks and witches. Cards that would, one day; Clow had confided in Hilligans, would escape, and would change the lives and futures of so many people. Clow had smiled when he said this; he stared up at the nighttime sky and looked at the brightest star. "I hope she can catch them . . ." he murmured.  
  
Hilligans had joined him at the window, and stared at the bright star, "Do you know who she is now?"  
  
Clow didn't take his eyes off the star as he laughed quietly, "No. . ." He clapped Hilligans on the shoulder, his dark eyes sparkling. "But she'll have one hell of a time . . . my cards will make sure of it."  
  
Clow touched the hard wood again, now he was going to go in. he paused and glanced down the corridor, at Hilligans and the cards that waited so good- naturedly for their master to create the last four cards.  
  
Hilligans nodded once and sharply, while the cards glowed and bobbed up and down, Clow could feel their excitement from where he stood. He drew a breath and opened the door. //it's time, Reed . . . magic? Don't fail me now . . .//The study glowed with the yellow rays of the afternoon sun, the sunlight poured over his desk, on the hard, polished floor, the deep wine red rug, and onto the isles of books. Dust motes floated lazily in the streams of light, unaware of the importance of the day. Clow looked back at the cards and then at Hilligans. He breathed out slowly, and smiled. "Would you like to watch?"  
  
"I've no time for thy black magic an' voodoo!" Hilligans waved his hand dismissively. But the cards spun elatedly, they gathered behind the grouchy coach driver, and pushed him forward much in the same manner that they had force Clow up the stairs. "Laddie!" Hilligans called warningly, "call off thy ruddy cards!"  
  
But Clow wasn't listening, he straightened the collar of his robes, brushed the golden sun and moon over twice, he wiped his slightly sweaty palms on his thighs. "I command thee . . . etcetera, etcetera" Clow murmured as he rehearsed the spell, "fire, . . .wind, . . .water, . . . earth . . . fire, wind, water . . . earth. Fire, wind, water, earth . . . got it!" He was nervous, and excited at the prospect of fulfilling the largest spell he had ever cast. He glanced at the leather, red seat that he called his thinking chair. Hilligans' shouts died out . . . lost as the latest vision took it's place.  
  
The boy with the blue hair was back. And this time he wasn't alone. The beautiful butterfly girl was back, and she was lovingly draped over the back of the chair. At the boy's feet, the midnight blue panther was sitting calmly, almost regally observing the centre of the study, where Clow was going to create the last four cards. They were waiting for something, and only the boy seemed aware that Clow was watching him. The corner of his lips twitched ever so slightly as he glanced briefly at Clow. The boy's eyes were still obstructed by a shadow, his identity still a mystery to Clow. He nodded once to Clow and Clow nodded back, before the boy's attention slipped off him and over to the other side of the room. Clow followed the boy's gaze. The girl was back again. But this time she was wearing a yellow uniform type thing, with stars as her mark. She clutched her staff close to her, as she stepped forward. She too was waiting, although Clow doubted she was aware of him like the boy was. On her side, the cheerful lion rubbed himself against her, affectionate and openly loving. The girl let go of her staff, to rub between the lion's ears. Both his and the girl's eyes were obscured by impossible shadows, but Clow had come to except the fact that the visions wouldn't allow him all the facts about the future. The lion looked up and behind himself, the longhaired white angel stood there, arms folded. Clow blinked as he looked at one of the angel's elbows. One of his hands lay below it, and in the hand the angel held two Clow cards. Their backs were to Clow, so he didn't know what cards they were but Clow wondered . . . did he give the two cards to the angel, or—  
  
"Laddie!" Hilligans voice brought Clow back to reality, barely seconds had past Clow realised as the cards were still pushing Hilligans toward Clow's study. "Ruddy cards!" The old man swore. "Nowt but mischief the lot o' thee!"  
  
Clow smiled, today was indeed *the* day.  
  
  
  
Clow stood in the middle of study, Hilligans had opted to stand close to the door, and the cards floated around Clow excitedly in their orbit. He was going to complete them, they could feel the magic gathering, reaching it's peak over the last week. Clow held out his key, and let go of the lace. The magical glowing sphere of light caught it in the air in front of him, preparing to change the tiny golden key to the gilded staff of Clow Reed's creation.  
  
"O Key, which hides the forces of darkness;" Clow raised his pale hands, magic circle began to write itself upon the floor, "Reveal thy true form before me." The cards shuddered with anticipation, Clow continued, his eyes sliding shut, "I, Clow Reed, command thee under our contract."  
  
Hilligans muttered under his breath, "Here goes Laddie . . . you can do it . . . jus' concentrate . . ."  
  
Clow smiled, within the magic circle, despite the howling magical wind, he could hear Hilligans' whispered prayer, he could feel the cards' exhilaration. He open his eyes and threw his arms forward, "Release!"  
  
The magic exploded and wrapped around his key eagerly, it too was more than ready to complete the set of cards.  
  
Grasping his staff, Clow turned within the circle. He gazed at each of the cards. They had begun to spin, just as they had in his vision, the one when he had come to the decision about the last four. At the compass points, the four remaining playing cards remained still and hovering, the kings looking faded and old against the gleaming, golden cards. //Magic . . .// Clow prayed once more, // . . . see me through . . .// He took a deep breath as he started the incantation that would finish his immense task.  
  
"Thy art the Clow Cards," he began, "Thy art a power unto thine own. Today, I, Clow Reed, thy master, have elected to fashion for thee four cards of power greater than thy own . . ." he paused for breath, as he slowly turned, "These will be thy rulers, after me; thee will obey them. Nevertheless, in order for their creation, I must lend on thy magic." The Move card was the first to give it's decision, it moved slightly closer and glowed brightly. Clow inclined his head, "Your faith and your loyalty is greatly appreciated, dear friend," he looked up and around, "cards, what is thy inclination?" The cards intensified their glowing, which Clow took to mean they agreed. Clow clutched his staff closer to him; he turned to his first card. While it wasn't strictly necessary he took the magic in order of their creation, the move card seemed like a good place to start. Dropping one arm to the side, Clow swung the gilded staff towards the weak card. "Move!" The card stopped spinning, shimmered and was sucked into his staff, Clow spun as his body went into automatic, he began slowly and quietly, " . . . Dash! . . . Song! . . . Lock! . . . Sleep!" He smiled as he gathered pace and his voice grew louder and more confident, "Float! Loop! Mist! Flower! Woody! Wave!" Hilligans smiled as the young magician virtually danced as he swung his golden staff at each card, his cards gleefully melded themselves with his staff. "Dark! Light! Silent! Voice! Rain! Illusion! Sand! Storm! Thunder!" Clow's hair began to fall from its deep violet tie, as the magic surged though his body." Fly! Snow! Power! Shield! Mirror! Fight! Jump! Twin! Dream!" The magic circle grew brighter and started to give off powerful blue ripples as Clow reached half way, "Bubbles! Through! Return! Big! Little! Glow! Time!" The strong glowing wind whipped around his feet, the magic building at an almost frightening pace, Clow drew a deep breath as he whirled, "CHANGE! FREEZE! SHOT! MAZE! SWORD! LIBRA! ARROW! SHADOW!" Clow staggered a little, the power of his cards combined with his own potent soul was making him a little light headed. He raised his staff and cried out the name of the last card, "CREATE!" The young magician actually leapt a few feet off the ground as his staff struck this last card.  
  
The Create card he had purposely left until last. It was the magic purpose of this card that would help Clow with his mission. He paused as he absorbed the power from the cards, lacing it strongly with his own. The four cards at the compass points suddenly began to vibrate as Clow turned his attention on them. He licked his lips; even they tingled with the shock of magic.  
  
He turned to the south as he had in his vision; "I command thee . . . with all the supremacy over the four winds of the Earth at thy will . . . Wind spirit, seal thyself into the form I have chosen . . ." The pale yellow woman, beautiful and gently, appeared for the briefest of seconds to confirm her creation, Clow swung the staff down hard and struck the air. "CLOW CARD!" Shimmering gold tendrils of magic obscured the woman from his sight and the card came into existence.  
  
Clow swung around to the east, raising his staff once more, "I command thee . . ." he called above the howling wind, "With all the supremacy over the three infernos of space, man and the earth at thy will . . ." the fiery girl began to appear, in a heated sphere of magic, her wings of pure flame spreading and filling the room with illuminating glow. He could feel her burn against his cheek as he brought the staff crashing down, "Fire spirit, seal thyself in the form I have chosen . . ." scarlet whips of magic wrapped themselves about the girl's form and dragged her towards her power's confine. " . . .CLOW CARD!!" the card burned the reddest red before turning a cool blue.  
  
Clow let his eyes slid shut, his body starting to tire from the vast energy. He took one stilted breath, trying to clear his mind of the fatigue. He turned to the west, his vision swimming a little as he focus on the old playing card. //two more. . . magic, that's all . . . two more. . .// he thought as he raised his staff. "I . . ." he panted, Hilligans fidgeted by the door, he could feel Clow's strength waning. "C'mon Laddie. . ." he breathed.  
  
Clow raised his head and swallowed, "I command thee. . ." he ground out, "With all the supremacy over the six oceans of the earth at thy will. . . Water Spirit. . ." he grimaced as his head began to feel to heavy to hold up, "Water spirit, seal thyself in the form which I have chosen. . ." Clow sucked in a deep breath; he pulled the staff down with all his fading force. "CLOW CARD!!"  
  
He fought to keep his eyes on the vicious looking water girl as her sapphire constraints pulled her towards her new form. As the card formed, Clow turned and staggered towards the last card. This was the most powerful, and it was going to claim the last vestiges of his strength. He fell to one knee before it, grasping his staff to prevent him from falling to the ground. Panting deeply, Clow glanced at the three other cards, they were perfectly sealed, but could he handle creating the last one?  
  
"What if I can't do it?" Clow murmured, his well of self doubt reopened like an old wound. He could barely bring his head up to look at the card much less seal the last spirit in it.  
  
//Thy can Laddie// Clow raised his head enough to look at the old man by the door, he had his eyes closed and was standing rigidly. Clow realised what Hilligans was doing when he found strength enough to stand. Hilligans was willing his strength upon Clow, like the cards were allowing Clow to tap their magic; Hilligans was offering what little he possessed to help the young magician. Clow smiled gratefully, as he faced the card again. He took a moment to compose himself and pressed the back of his pale hand against his sweating forehead. A look of determination crossed his face as he slowly raised his staff, //For the final time, magic . . . do not fail me . . .// Clow was slightly surprised to suddenly hear differing echoes of his prayer sound in his mind, // Do not fail our master . . . Do not fail this good lad . . .//  
  
Clow tighten his grip on his gilded staff as he called the final verse of the incantation, "I command thee . . . with all the supremacy of the earth at thy will. . . Earth spirit. . . seal thyself in this form I have chosen . . ." he slammed the staff down as hard as he could, as the emerald green woman came on to this celestial plain. "CLOOOW CARD!!" Clow roared as he complete the seal on the last card of the Clow Cards.  
  
  
  
There was a slight breeze against his face, as if someone was fanning him . . .  
  
"Master?!" A voice said in surprise and disbelief. "What do you mean?!"  
  
"This is a joke right?!" Yelled another, furious and shocked, "You're kidding."  
  
Clow opened his eyes, he was in his downstairs study, where he usually keep his thinking chair. . . the chair he was sitting in now, for that matter. . . Clow looked around, but found he couldn't move, in fact his body seemed to be working by itself. //it's a vision . . .// a calm, logical voice reminded him, //pay attention . . .// Clow looked at the two beings in front of him . . . And the first thing that amazed him was the fact he could make out their eyes, but not the colours, the light from the windows too bright to make them out. The cheerful lion was staring at him in incredulity, while the angel . . . Clow struggled to make out the features of this angel, again the almost blinding blue light from the high windows blotted out any telling colours in the angel's features. Again Clow couldn't tell if this was the black haired or the white haired angel . . . but he wished he knew, when he felt his heart twist in agony when the being looked up at him, hurt and betrayal making him look away almost as quickly. He didn't understand why he felt himself force a smile on his face and say, "This is no joke. Today I shall leave this life."  
  
The lion cast a glance at the angel, who moved away to stare out the window, Clow realise the lion was looking at the angel with brotherly concern. "Today? This minute? Tonight? Or perhaps a quick cup of tea, maybe a bit of crumpet then you'll just pop your clogs?!" The lion growled at him, Clow could tell he was angry not for himself, but for the harm Clow was causing to the beautiful angel. "That's what you've always been, Clow, damned stubborn!" The lion looked at the angel, "What about . . .?"  
  
The angel glared at the lion over his shoulder, silently warning him not to continue. The lion cast one angrier look at Clow before stalking out of the room, evidently beyond expressing his fury civilly. Clow looked at the angel, he desperately wish he could ask the questions that were burning in his mind, //the black haired one or the white one? If the dark, then why were you trying to escape. . . if the light, who were you going to attack. . .? // Clow didn't understand the sudden need to know, he just wanted to know which of the two angels he was breaking the heart of.  
  
The angel bit a perfectly full lip, and looked at him tearfully, "You're going to leave us . . . leave me?" He stepped hesitantly closer, "Why? Master, why are you leaving me?"  
  
Clow wanted to leapt out of his chair and sooth the angel, do anything for him, just to see him happy again, but again his body betrayed him. "I am so tired of this life," he explained calmly, "I *need* to go."  
  
The angel looked down at the floor as he tried to absorb this fact. "Why? Why would you want to . . . unless . . . Are we the—?"  
  
"No." Clow answered simply. "You're not the reason . . . neither of you have ever brought a single moment of unhappiness to my life."  
  
The angel instantly looked up, he fought a short battle with himself, and chose to fall to his knees by Clow's chair. He picked up Clow's hand and started to press it against his face. Clow leaned towards him, the smell of fresh snow and lavender emanated from the angel, he ran his fingers into the silken hair, it's colour still a mystery. "Then why?" The angel sobbed finally.  
  
Clow murmured his response, "Because I am sick of knowing everything that has happened, that is happening, that will happen."  
  
"But I love you!" The angel cried then flinched as if he had committed some terrible sin. He looked down in shame; Clow slid his fingers under the angel's chin and pulled it up gently. "I knew this as well;" he gently ran his fingers over the angel's lips, wishing he could kiss the ice-cold pale lips. He laughed cynically, "But I also know that one day you will fall in love with another, and he will be more than I ever could be to you. . ."  
  
"No-one . . ." the angel pressed his head against Clow's knee, not willing to hear Clow's words. "Never . . . nobody . . . I'll do anything, just please don't leave me . . ." Clow raised his hand, and placed it softly on the angel's head, he could feel the angel's name rising to his own lips.  
  
"There's nothing you can do, for it has already been decided . . ." //here it comes,// Clow thought, he concentrated hard so not to lose the name once it had been spoken. "My beloved -----"  
  
A cold splash of water on his face made Clow's eyes snap open, he sat up and came face to face with the watery features of . . .  
  
"Watery?" the young looking water spirit nodded, a soft pressure from behind him made him look around slightly, the gentle features of the Windy smiled at him. She floated over to sit with the Earthy, She smiled and held her arms forward, and a warm breeze brushed Clow's cheek. Clow smiled as she dipped and leaned near him. He raised his hand and stroked her cheek; she turned her head and placed a soft kiss on his hand. "Windy . . ." he murmured, her name. He glanced around he was in his bedroom, Hilligans was lying unconscious on a nearby sofa, the Firey was lighting a fire and the Earthy held the cards in her lap as she sat on the end of the bed. She nodded to the watery, who bowed respectfully before turning back to her card form. The Firey cast one glance at her new master before bowing politely, she joined the watery and the two cards floated to join the pile of cards. The Windy left her master, once she was satisfied that the young magician was comfortably settled back, and checked briefly on Hilligans. She nodded at Clow to assure him that his friend was fine, and then also returned to her card form. Once the cards were settled, the Earthy silently stood and glided over to his desk. She picked up the golden key, and glided back to Clow. She handed him the cards and then the key, nodded her respects and returned to her card form. She floated over and joined the set of cards her new master held in his hands.  
  
Clow sat for a few moments, just staring at the cards in his hands. Their magic seeping out, reverberating into his palms, he could feel their pleasure and satisfaction, and he too felt it.  
  
He smiled, he'd done it!  
  
"I did it. . ." he murmured, then it sank in, his head jerked up and he gasped, "I did it! I really did it!!" He looked at the card and then the key, and started to laugh, "I really did it!!"  
  
Despite being drained and paler than usual, and being eighteen years of age, Clow reed got up and started to jump up and down on his bed. He laughed joyfully, as his cards floated out of his hand and put on a glowing, orbiting dance around him.  
  
Hilligans opened his eyes to see the young Clow reed in his pyjamas, surrounded by his magical creations; he pushed himself up and stood. He staggered slightly, but put that down to his tiredness. Clow leapt off the bed when he spotted Hilligans was awake. The dark haired magician grabbed the old man's hands and started to spin the pair. "I did it!!" He cried, "I really did it Mister Hilligans!!"  
  
Hilligans stumbled and landed rather hard on his backside, Clow blushed and put his hands over his mouth, "Gomen!"  
  
Hilligans looked up and smiled, "I don't mind the odd bruise Laddie . . . least now you've finished with them ruddy cards, an' there won't be any more o' thy mumbo-jumbo!"  
  
  
  
Two months later, Clow was staring out of his study's window. He'd had had a strange dream the night before and it troubled him. He couldn't tell whether it had been a mere dream or a vision posing as a dream. In the dream/vision, Clow had been sitting up in bed, reading some nameless book, when he had heard a knock at the door. When he looked up, a person had stepped into the room, Clow almost gasped as the wave of melodious love, of pure affection, and of yearning desire made his body tingle. Only the candle he carried lighted the face of the being, but Clow knew it was the weeping angel. Clow couldn't take his eyes off the angel; he didn't want to, he felt like he had been waiting for this moment. The angel's head dipped slightly, his face betraying a slight embarrassment. Clow blinked, feeling his head turn, unwillingly, towards the window. There was a storm raging outside, a snowstorm. //Snow . . .// Clow instantly knew that the angel loved snow, he smiled slightly as the angel fumbled with his candle, trying hard not to fidget and wanting to find a different excuse for why he was in Clow's room, other than the fact he had had a disturbing dream.  
  
"I'm happy you're here . . ." Clow began, he was giving the angel an excuse, "The storm was . . . upsetting me . . . will you stay with me?"  
  
The angel looked at him gratefully, and moved closer. He blew out his candle and crawled onto the bed. Clow set aside the book, and held out his arms. With almost childlike glee, the angel dived into the embrace, and pressed his head against Clow's chest. Clow giggled slightly as he felt the angel purr. "You're purring!" He had remarked with amusement. The angel lifted his catlike eyes to him. He had stopped purring. "No, don't stop . . ." Clow whispered, "I like it."  
  
But the angel had paid no attention. He raised his cool hand, and ran his fingers over Clow's lips. His attention completely focused on them as he drew closer. Clow's eyes slid closed, as he tasted ice-cold pale lips press lightly against his. As soon as they stopped kissing, Clow promised himself, he was going to ask the being's name, what colour his hair was because it was too dark to tell, when was he going to enter Clow's life because Clow was already in love with the gorgeous, alien eyed creature---  
  
And then Clow had woken. He was breathing deeply, it was still very early in the morning and even Hilligans wasn't awake. Clow had tried to go back to sleep, but he was flushed, aroused, and he couldn't help glancing at the door every few minutes . . . praying for another visitation.  
  
Clow shook his head, and leaned his forehead against the glass of his study's window. He sighed deeply. //Mister Hilligans?//  
  
//Aye Laddie?// came Hilligans reply, he was mending the wheel on the coach, Clow had offered to do it but the old man had declined, stating that he didn't want the coach to have any of Clow's patent 'improvements'.  
  
// I'm bored//  
  
//there's worked to be done in the garden, if thy can leave thy cards alone for a few hours//  
  
Clow looked back at his desk, the cards were sleeping, //I'm bored Mister Hilligans . . . but not *that* bored.//  
  
//Then I canne help thee . . .// There was a pause as Hilligans stopped to think about what he could suggest, Clow could imagine that the old man paused, hammer in the air, and leaning heavily on the wooden frame of the wheel. //Thy could try learning to cook . . . thy did say that thee had had enough o' my porridge in the mornin'. . . although. . . I bet thee couldn't learn it without magic!// the man was teasing, it was in the tone of his voice, but Clow was intrigued. He'd never done anything manual like cooking before.  
  
Clow smiled, //Mister Hilligans, I'm insulted! I can do things without my magic! . . . very well then, I take your challenge.//  
  
A few hours later, Marcibay trudged into the kitchen, expecting to see the bubbles card hard at work clearing up Clow's failed attempt at cook. When he couldn't feel the magical aura of the card, he pushed open the door. The sweet smell of cake was the first thing he encountered. Cooling on a rack was seven different types of cake, some he'd never even seen before. He saw Clow, sitting at a table virtually heaving with books, with his sleeves rolled up and an apron loosely tied about his waist. A book was floating in front of him as he read from it, ". . . Mix batter until butter and sugar have form a thick bond. . ." Clow lifted the spoon from the bowl, a lump of butter and sugar plopped rather unceremoniously from it. "Hmmm. . . Clow frowned at it and turned back to the book, it turned a page as he continued to read, " Add milk and flour to mixture . . . fold in egg . . ."  
  
He put the bowl down, and turned away to fetch the ingredients from a nearby counter. Hilligans smiled as the spoon continued to mix the batter.  
  
"Milk . . . flour . . . and . . ." Clow looked up at the shelf, an egg floated down and past him. It hovered over the bowl, as he brought the milk and flour over. He paused as he sniffed the air. Clow's dark eyes widened in concern as he stared at the oven. Hilligans chuckled as Clow let go of the flour and milk, which was left floating in the air, and rushed over to the slightly smoking oven. "My cookies!" he exclaimed disappointedly, as the door flew open and a tray of round, burnt things levitated out. Clow frowned, sighed and said over his shoulder, "Before you say a word Mister Hilligans . . ."  
  
Hilligans shrugged out of his thick working coat, "Laddie . . . it helps if you concentrate on one task at a time . . . you 'ave to focus your energies." He motioned towards the self-mixing bowl, the hovering egg, jug of milk and packet of flour, the book, and the floating tray of burnt cookies. "It's better to centre on one job an' do it well, rather than try an' do many and end up wit' a mess."  
  
Clow sighed; "It seems to work for magic."  
  
"Aye, Laddie but that's magic . . . it needs you to multi-task . . ." Hilligans cut himself a slice of one of the perfect cakes that Clow was cooling on the windowsill. "Life, thankfully, is a mite bit harder, but in the long run, a little more simpler." He moves towards the oven, and placed the kettle on the hub, he leaned against the counter, as he bit into the cake slice; it had a lemony tang, but was very sweet. "I 'ave one question though. . ."  
  
Clow looked up from his book, "Hmmm?"  
  
Hilligans pointed at the cakes, "Who's going t' eat *all* of those? It's jus' the two o' us lads, an' thy cards don't eat a crumb."  
  
Clow shrugged slightly and joked; "Maybe your horses would like some . . ."  
  
As Hilligans scowled at him and turned away to tend to the kettle, Clow stared thoughtfully at the extra food, he realised that it would be nice to have someone extra to share everything that he had with.  
  
  
  
The next few days Clow spent roaming his grounds thoughtfully, spring was just coming into the Reed Mansion. He was still thinking about the extra cakes. He and Hilligans had been alone at the mansion for two years now, they were happy but still . . .  
  
Clow sighed, perhaps it was time he went to the town and employed some sort of butler. As soon as the idea came into his head, he nixed it. Clow wasn't as pampered as he had been when he had left home, he didn't need a butler, nor would he want one. He paused by Hilligans' work shed, he wasn't there, and the old coach driver had gone to the town for a new saw. Clow looked around, the small shed was of dark wood, Hilligans made it of course. The man simply wouldn't let Clow make nor fix things for him. Curiosity getting the better of him, Clow placed a hand on the door to open it.  
  
//Laddie, don't thee get into mischief; leave well alone// Hilligans' voice floated into his mind. Clow chuckled slightly as he lifted his hand off the door. "So . . ." murmured Clow to himself, "You do know a few hexes." He turned away from the charmed door. The sun played on the surface of the water as Clow approached it. He wasn't certain what was drawing him closer to the water, but he knelt down by it. He leant forward to peer into it.  
  
Clow gasped as the boy with the blue hair stared back, he smiled at Clow as the young magician's mouth fell open. The boy appeared to chuckle as Clow sat up suddenly. "Well . . . that was . . . unexpected." He said, before leaning forward again. The boy was gone, but Clow's reflection still hadn't returned, instead a man stared back, his eyes widening in shock too. Clow smiled slightly as he recognised the man, he was the one from his first vision. He was the one that had caught the beautiful grey haired girl when she had fallen out of the tree. Clow laughed slightly, he liked the look of this man. But for him, Clow realised it was night, it felt like he was staring into another world, //or another time . . .// his mind calmly stated. As the man disappeared from the water, Clow sat back too. "This is all very . . . strange," Clow said, but he didn't feel that disturbed by the sight of the blue haired boy and the kind looking man, in fact he felt . . . // comforted? // . . . Pleased that he had seen them. Clow smiled as he leaned forward who would he see this time.  
  
At first Clow thought it was merely his own reflection, but then he realised that not only was the person staring back much older, it was also a woman. The woman was upset, and angry about something, she lifted her hand to the water, her eyes were sharp, and black, very dark. Her hair was curly, with grey highlights. It used to be shiny black like his, he could feel it, and he could also feel her thoughts. She knew she was dying, fading away, she didn't have enough . . . her eyes widened as she became aware of Clow. Her face twisted in a horrible scowl, it was unpleasant, and cruel. The mysterious woman slapped the water, and her image disappeared. Again, Clow sat back on his heels. He didn't feel like he did after seeing the first two reflections, that was a nice warm feeling, the woman inspired a cold feeling, like she was something wrong. He didn't dwell on it, and chose to obey his curiosity once more, a boy . . . perhaps the same age as he, looked back, and he smiled and placed a hand against the water. Clow let his hand hover over the spot, afraid of disturbing the surface. The boy was beautiful, more than beautiful, he was damn near perfect. He wasn't human; no human could have such jade green eyes. Clow looked closer, and the boy smiled happily. The jade green eyes were slits, like cat eyes, they were so . . .  
  
"Enchanting . . ." Clow murmured, and blinked as the boy's pale lips mouthed the word a few seconds later. It was a younger version of the black haired angel, Clow realised. His hair was glossier, and his pale skin was close to perfection, he looked like the angel he had dreamed of. Clow had realised that the weeping angel, the one that cried out his love for Clow, the one that had inspired such love from Clow, could be this angel. It was either the black haired one, or the white haired one.  
  
As Clow stared deeply at this black haired youth, he felt a desire stir in himself. It wasn't the sweet, affectionate loving one he had had in his dream, it was more . . . primal, he felt lust for this angel, and could see the same feelings reflected in the deep jade eyes.  
  
Clow sighed, "When will you come into my life . . .?"  
  
He was startled as the reflection mouthed an answer.  
  
  
  
"Whenever you decide it . . ."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Is that him?  
  
DrM: hmm?  
  
Clow: sheesh! You don't even pay attention during your own fics! How do you even expect the readers to?!  
  
DrM: [sheepish] well . . . I'm a little nervous . . .  
  
Clow: about what?  
  
DrM: about dude!!  
  
Clow: dude?  
  
Black haired angel: I think she means me. . .  
  
Clow: [drooling] gaaaaahhhh!  
  
BH angel: [nods] yeah I know. . . I'm gorgeous like that!  
  
Yue: just because you look like—POOF!![DrM boots him to his right chapter]  
  
DrM: [kinda jittery with nerves] so? How was it? Please R&R!! And see you in the next chapter!! 


	8. Hei-ying

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul. . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Seven: Hei-ying  
  
[Ho-boy. . . there's some cussin' in here. . . fair warning! And I don't want anyone's momma beating me up 'cause you start cussin' too. . .]  
  
  
  
"Steady, lassies . . . There's a good bale o' hay for thee waitin' at 'ome."  
  
Hilligans rubbed his eyes; it was late as he was pulling up to the first gates of the Reed mansion. He bit back a yawn as he pulled the reins up slightly. He had always found that the horses had an easier time of it if they went through the barrier slowly. He rubbed his eyes again; he was tired, very tired. However the day had proved productive, Hilligans' eyes slid down to his brand new saw. Clow had offered to make him on but . . .  
  
A sudden wave of nausea hit Marcibay; the taste of brackish water suddenly filled his mouth. He spluttered, and one hand slipped off the reins, and went to his throat. He was aware that there was nothing in his mouth, nothing that would make him feel like gasping for air, but he was also aware that he was drowning in someway. He began to panic, as his lungs struggled, almost bursting as they tried to fight for freely available air.  
  
The horses started to neigh quietly as they sensed their coach driver's alarm. Marcibay tried to calm himself as the vision continued violently, he could see the horses, see the lights of Reed mansion, but he could also see the murky depths of water. He looked up; above him was the surface of the water, around him was strong vines dragging him further from the water. A figure was above the water, but Marcibay couldn't make it out, it was just watching him, just watching him dro—Hilligans turned around, he was in Clow's bedroom, but it was empty . . . and full at the same time, voices, whispers, yells echoed around the room. Hilligans felt as if he had been taken out of the frame of time and was now just experiencing impressions from the future, the past or maybe the present, Clow's voice: "I command thee . . . in this form I have chosen . . . Love me, crave me, and no one else . . . been away so long because we have a new addition to our family . . . No! No! NO! NO! NOOOO! "  
  
Voices of people he'd never heard before, a sharp young man with a hate filled voice, "Come here, Stuffed Animal! Let me cut off your tail for your arrogance!", a child screaming in pain, "You're hurting me! Let me go! Onegai! You're hurting me!" a roar of anger, a last stand, a last fighting war cry. "I hate you! You bastard! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! He was only a child! A fucking child! What the hell did he ever---" the roar began to be mixed into other voices "Do to you--To-Tomoyo-chan wouldn't you rather be--What are you doing here in that form--So give up now since Syaoran and I will collect all the--Oh key of Clow that hides the--OI WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY--Meilin I thought I told you to--Ever heard of a sister complex--must record your bravery Sakura--Sakura I have to tell you something I love . . ."  
  
Hilligans covered his ears as the voices became smothering, but one voice, muffled by his hands, made it through, "There will be another . . ." Hilligans tried to block it but it was insistent, "Someone purer than this tainted soul . . ." Hilligans' eyes snapped open as he became aware of a presence in the room, in front of him was a black haired boy, he couldn't have been older than fifteen but he was covered in blood. He lifted his hand; he was holding a bloodied pair of scissors. Hilligans still heard the voice; "He will take my place within your heart."  
  
The black haired boy pulled a long plait forward and began to snip it off, he coiled it in his hand and held it towards Hilligans. "But I love you. . . and I always. . . will. . ." His dark eyes were hidden by an impossible shadow. The voices stopped suddenly, Hilligans took the braid, shocked by the boy's utter calmness. The boy dropped the scissors and ran past Hilligans. Hilligans watched him as he leapt into Clow's arms. Marcibay's eyes widened as Clow pulled the boy closer and lustily removed the younger child's clothing, kissing the boy's mouth and throat with primal desire. "I love you, Master Clow Reed . . ." the boy began to say. Clow snorted and began to laugh cynically, "Of course you do . . . I can do with you as I please . . ."  
  
The sensation of drowning came to him again, he was going to die! He couldn't breathe!  
  
//SOMEONE HELP ME!//  
  
Hilligans called out, clutching at his throat. It was closing, and the figure above the water still made no movement to save him.  
  
  
  
"Mister Hilligans?" Marcibay frowned slightly, it was Clow's voice, "Come on . . . concentrate on the sound of my voice. . ." a damp cool cloth on his head, brought him closer to the surface of consciousness. "It's all right, you're safe," Clow continued. He'd heard Hilligans' call for help, and had rushed out on his fly card. He had been waiting for him, he had something wonderful to show him, his latest creation, but he was starting to worry when there was no sign of the punctual old man. He'd found Hilligans just past the gates, and for an awful moment, thought that the old man was dead. Clow didn't care that he was dressed in nothing but his dressing gown and pyjama trousers; Hilligans was the utmost in his mind.  
  
He used the float card to get the unconscious man to his room, had the windy and the Libra gather and calm the horses, corralling them back into their stables. He charmed the coach and asked the dash to put Hilligans' stagecoach back in it's usual holding. Once inside Clow asked the watery to provide cool water and the move to fetch him a cloth. While Clow patiently pressed the damp handkerchief against Hilligans' sweating brow, he could feel the magical residue of a vision. A particularly violent one. After his last brutal vision, Clow didn't want to venture into the old man's mind, //Besides . . .// he thought with a sad smile, Hilligans would probably consider that a little bit of an intrusion. "Wouldn't you Mister Hilligans . . .? You'd say . . ." Clow put on a really bad imitation of Marcibay, "Laddie, don't ye go messin' in me mind . . . I don't go'a traipsin' in thy's so keep out'o' mine!" He chuckled lightly.  
  
About an hour later, Hilligans had started to show signs of coming out of his trance, so Clow tried to lead the man out, "That's just it, you just concentrate on the sound of my voice and you will be alright . . ."  
  
The old man's eyes fluttered open, and tried to focus on Clow. Clow smiled gently and handed him a glass of water, "Are you okay?"  
  
Hilligans frowned, "No Laddie . . ." he said grimly, "I've seen sum'in, sum'in *bad*, and it's sum'in bad about thee . . . but . . ." the old man broke off, as he drank, "I canne remember it . . ."  
  
"Visions can be like that . . ." Clow explained gently, he helped the old man sit up, "They can be so confusing, but the important details will come back to you when it is necessary . . ."  
  
"Aye, of that I have no doubt . . ." the coach driver broke off again; he frowned as he felt something, "What's that Laddie?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"I can feel thee . . . I can feel thy ruddy cards . . ." he paused as he cocked his head, "An' now I can feel sum'in else . . . what is it? What 'ave thee done?"  
  
Clow smiled as he rose from the bed, he picked up a small wicker basket from the desk and brought it over to Hilligans' bed. "I've made him for the cards . . . I thought that I should start preparing them for their next Master."  
  
"Next Master?"  
  
"Yes . . ." Clow looked up from the basket, "I figured it out, well, at least part of it . . . the girl, she's going to try and catch my cards . . . because, for some reason, they are going to escape some time in the far future . . ."  
  
"Aye . . ." Hilligans looked warily at the basket, "So what does that 'ave to do wit' tha' basket?"  
  
Clow placed it down one the floor, and resumed his place on the bed, "If she tries to simply catch them, how will she do it? I'm the only one that knows all the tricks of the cards, the safety guards I put in them, if I'm dead, how will she know the right incantations? The right way to catch the cards? How to seal them or even start to create her own?" The young magician began to become rather excited, "So I made this . . . being, I was only out for a few minutes afterwards, that must mean my magic must be getting much stronger!"  
  
Hilligans held up a silencing hand, "What do you mean you made this 'being'?"  
  
Clow picked up a small bundle of blankets, he was careful with it, but he was excited, and proud to show off his latest creation. "It's a . . . star guardian." He unwrapped it hastily; keen to show his old friend what he had done. Hilligans, on the other hand, felt apprehension building, he hadn't even seen this creature of Clow's but he had a bad feeling about it. By Clow's mannerisms, the way he was eagerly preparing to show this creation off, it was clear Clow had only just created the being that day, it was unusual for Clow, as the young magician usually spent at least three days planning his creations . . . //unless . . .// thought Hilligans, //the boy must 'ave had a vision too . . .//  
  
He wondered briefly what Clow had seen to prompt this unusual action. The boy finally pulled the last blanket from the hidden being. It was a cocoon of white feathers, "H-he's still a little sensitive to light," Clow stammered a bit excitedly, as he pulled the first wing from the being, followed by the second. As the little being's form was revealed, Clow looked up at Hilligans, "It'll take a few weeks or even months be-before he's fully grown . . . but-but he's going to be very intelligent . . . and now, we ha-have someone to eat cakes with! I've even put him under an obedience spell, so you don't need to worry about him causing mischief in your garden! . . . I-I-I don't even know what to call him . . . isn't he perfect?!"  
  
While Clow cooed over the newly created baby, Hilligans tried desperately not to show his horror . . .  
  
The child had long pure black hair; Clow had created the child from his vision.  
  
  
  
  
  
Within a day, the child could crawl. Within a week, the child could walk. Within a month, the child had grown to have the appearance of a two-year- old human boy. Clow became a little concerned when he realised the child wasn't speaking, but Hilligans assured him, in a manner more like he was prophesising the Apocalypse, that the child would most certainly talk one day. Hilligans hadn't taken to happily to the child and regarded him more like he was a ticking bomb, than the perfect child Clow had created. Clow on the other hand was simply enthralled about the child; it was like a new pet to him. The child was developing a little slower than Clow would have liked but still it was interesting to see him everyday becoming more apt at living. //Living . . . //Clow would repeat the word in his mind, //My first truly living creation! Incredible!//  
  
However there was another area of concern for Clow, the child not only didn't seem to talk, but also didn't seem to be able to sense the Clow cards.  
  
Clow would hide a card, then asked the child to go find it for him. The child, who was rather serious and rarely smiled, would search every room of the six-floored Reed mansion until he found the card. After six weeks of his creation, Clow discovered that the child could read.  
  
He'd found the child sitting in one of his isles, patiently reading a dictionary. Clow smiled, "What are you doing?"  
  
The child snapped the book shut and stood, he bowed respectively. Clow chuckled; "It's all right, I'm just curious as to what you are doing?"  
  
The child sat again and re-opened the book; he pointed to a word, and stared up at Clow. Clow sat beside the child and read the word aloud, "Learn? Oh, you are learning! What are you learning to do?"  
  
Clow smiled even more as the boy flicked through the pages quickly to find his response, "Read? You are learning to read?" The child frowned slightly as he nodded, he pointed at Clow, then at the word. Clow understood the boy's confusion immediately, "The word sounds like my name, doesn't it?"  
  
The boy nodded, as Clow went on to explain, "You see, to read, that word is spelt R E A D, that is in to read the words in a book . . . whereas my name, Reed is spelt R double E D." he pressed a hand against his chest, "I am Clow Reed, my name is Clow Reed. You . . ." he motioned towards the book, "Are reading the book. Understand?"  
  
The black haired boy nodded, then started to flick through the pages again, and then pointed to another passage, which had a family coat of arms beside it. "The Reed family of England, one of the oldest and most powerful warlock blood lines known to magic community of England," Clow chuckled as he read, he tapped the emblem, "That's my family crest, my father was one of the Reeds, here . . ." Clow pulled the book out the child's hands gently, he turned back a few pages, to another family inscription, "This is the Li clan of China. This is my mother's family; they are also a powerful family of magicians. We are part of both these families."  
  
The child looked up at him and motioned at himself, Clow nodded, "Yes, you too. You are my creation, my magic flows through you just as my parents' magic combines and flows through me. You are a part of my family."  
  
The child solemnly nodded, and began to read the inscription in the dictionary. Clow gazed at him fondly as he began to learn about his family ties, but after half an hour Clow spoke again. "It's time to begin your training session, would you like to continue to read, and we can train later, or would you like to train now?"  
  
The black haired boy considered both options carefully as he normally did. His decision was made when he snapped the book shut and carefully slid it back into its place. He stood and nodded his readiness.  
  
  
  
A knock at his door made Clow look up from his book, "Come in," he said knowing who was behind the door. In fact he had been expecting him, the spring had turned unexpectedly dry and Clow had activated his storm card. Hilligans hadn't said anything but Clow could tell that the old man was upset that his well cared for garden was beginning to die. The door creaked quietly open as Clow's creation stepped in. the black haired boy was carrying a single candle, he paused uncertainly in the door way. Clow blinked in surprise as the memory of the strange vision came back, the candle lighted the child's lower face. Was this what the vision meant?  
  
He glanced out the window, it wasn't a snowstorm, just a thunderstorm, and the vision had been very clear, that it was during a snowstorm that the angel had come to him. Clow had dreamed of the angel, dreamed and had had visions. The visions were cruel, they would not allow Clow to see what colour the angel's hair or clothes were. And Clow was desperate to know, know anything about this tender angel, who he would one day love dearly, whose heart he would one day break. Clow's dreams were more generous, but he knew they weren't exactly true, they were fantasies, providing him with one answer, sometimes the angel would be the white haired one, his gentle amethyst eyes demure as he pressed his hand against Clow, just on the verge of a sweet kiss. The other times, it was the black haired angel, his jade eyes wild with passion as he reverently crawled into Clow's bed, smiling as he shrugged out of his clothes obediently.  
  
Clow couldn't make up his mind which he wanted more, one was gentle, the other passionate. The white haired angel inspired feelings of a deep love, deeper than Clow had ever known, perhaps something even spiritual, but the black haired angel . . . the one Clow had now created . . . he set Clow's blood alight, he almost couldn't stand the infatuation that he felt for the black haired angel, it made him burn and he wanted to be consumed by the fire.  
  
Clow couldn't help the smile that spread on his face as he gazed at the black haired child. He was still a few months away from full maturation. Clow could see the angel from his dreams in the smaller eight-year-old sized boy. The shiny black hair, that he would one day run his fingers through, the pale skin, that Clow knew would become heated and flushed, the pale lips, that would utter his name with such loving passion, the child's wide jade green eyes filled with such innocence, Clow knew would one day, would be filled with passion. //Desire for me . . .// Clow blinked and quickly turned his attention to the window, he took some calming breathes before he could look at the boy again. He couldn't help the feelings that the boy provoked, but knew that until the boy was fully matured he couldn't, wouldn't touch the child.  
  
The child was still looking at him worriedly, as Clow turned his attention back on him, "Are you afraid?"  
  
The boy tried not to look scared as the lightning lit the room briefly, but when the thunder cracked loudly, his resolve broke and he dropped the candle and ran to Clow. Clow silently bid the Rain to douse the candle's flame as he pulled the boy on to his bed. "Don't be . . ." he rocked the child, "It's called a storm, it's a type of weather. It would be natural if *I* weren't creating it . . ."  
  
The child looked up at him, Clow smiled, "I have a card that can make storms, just like . . ." he motioned to the Rain spirit that was raining cheerfully on the dropped candle, "Just like that spirit causes the rain . . . thank you Rain, that's quite enough."  
  
The card bobbed on her little cloud and returned to her card form. The child plucked the card out of the air as it travelled back to the pack and pulled it towards him. He stared at it intently, as he crawled under the heavy scarlet quilt. Clow smiled and stroked the child's head softly, "It's a Clow card, it contains a magic spirit," the child nodded his understanding, "This particular spirit can control rain, she makes rain, and she can control the direction of natural rain . . . that's her name there." He pointed to the small gold banner. The child ran his finger over the black letters slowly. "If she ever escapes, you will have to tell the Cardcaptor to overwhelm her with the Watery card, turn her rain against her."  
  
The clock began to chime softly, ten o'clock. Clow smiled, "It's late, and we should try and get some sleep." As Clow got up to remove his dressing gown, the child let the card float back to the pack. He watched it silently, thinking about what Clow had been saying.  
  
Ever so often Clow would give him little bits of advice about the cards, how to catch them, what they did, and he would also talk about 'The Cardcaptor'. He didn't know who 'The Cardcaptor' was; the Master didn't seem to know 'the Cardcaptor's' name, even though he knew the names of everything else.  
  
He watched as the Master moved around the room, softly blowing out the lit candles. The Master knew everything, the child had decided, he knew more than Mister Hilligans did, even though Mister Hilligans was older. The Master stared at him before blowing out the second to last candle; the last was on his bedside table. The Master yawned and pulled the hair tie out of his long black hair, it wasn't as long as the child's, but it fascinated him. He, personally, hardly ever pulled his hair from the tight pony tail he always kept it in, the Master seemed to like the style, and when they washed it together, the Master would instruct the Bubbles card to be extra gentle with his black tresses. The only part of his hair that wasn't in the tightly banded ponytail was a single plait that fell behind his left ear, and on his shoulder.  
  
As he watched Clow, a thought formed in his mind, Clow was always explaining the names of objects, of people, of the cards . . . but Clow had never used his name . . . he frowned as he tried to recall his name, only to realise Clow had never given him one. He had said he was part of the Reed family, so that meant that he was a 'Reed'. But the Master had a name that went before that, and the child knew he wasn't supposed to use it for some reason, The Master was *always* the Master and never anything else. // But . . . what am I called?//  
  
Clow climbed back into the bed and was about to blow out the last candle when he heard, "Master? What is my name?"  
  
Clow blinked, for a few seconds he didn't understand where the small voice had come from. He turned and looked at the child, who stared back, expectantly. After a few seconds, a slight frown developed on the child's face, he opened his mouth and said again, "Master? What is my name?"  
  
Clow blinked, he'd never heard the child speak before. The child was about to ask again when Clow laughed, "I heard you . . . it's just since when have you been able to speak?"  
  
"I don't know, Master. I wanted to know something, but I do not have any other means of finding out. My name is not in any of the books, I am not one of the cards, and you have not explained it yet." Another frown formed on the boy's brow, "If you did not wish to discuss it yet, I apologise . . . however I wish to know now. What is my name?"  
  
Clow looked bemusedly at him, the small boy had just given the most eloquent speech he had ever heard. He had assumed the boy knew his name, Clow had never had to use it because the boy was always close, and often he was the only one Clow would be teaching something to. Hilligans never used the name, he didn't even use Clow's name. "Hei-ying." Clow smiled, "Your name is Hei-ying."  
  
Hei-ying looked up at the ceiling as he recalled the name, "Hei-ying. Li Hei-ying, a member of the Li clan of China. He wasn't your grandfather, he was your uncle."  
  
Clow smiled proudly, Hei-ying had certainly learned the bloodlines that had lead to his creation. "Yes, he was the only member that didn't support my mother's marriage to my father. However, after I was born, he was the one charged with my training in the eastern arts of magic." Clow stroked Hei- ying's head again; "I am now the one that is charged with your training, I hope I will be a good teacher."  
  
"You are the Master!" Hei-ying looked at Clow as if he had said some sort of curse, "You will be the best."  
  
Clow chuckled as he blew the last candle out. "I hope so," he murmured as he lay down, and pull Hei-ying closer. "I hope so."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: An eight year old kid?! What do you think I am?! A pervert?! You hentai byatch!!  
  
DrM: you hentai. . . [tries to think of good come back, fails] You HENTAI!!  
  
Hei-ying: maybe you should try to explain. . .  
  
DrM: stop sounding so rational . . . we all know what happens to you! [Turns to the readers] unlike Clow, I don't think he's a pervert, and Hei- ying isn't technically his child so. . .  
  
Clow: sooo. . . I still get it on?  
  
DrM: yes.  
  
Clow: WOO-HOOO!!  
  
DrM: but not with Yue. . .  
  
Clow: NANI?!  
  
DrM: . . .yet! [Laughs] please R&R minna-chan! I LONELY!! REVIEWS MAKE DrM HAPPY!! 


	9. Mistakes

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part eight: Mistakes  
  
[WARNING: yaoi-lemon-call it what you will. . . it's happening here!! Please don't flame me for the content!!]  
  
  
  
After four months after Hei-ying's creation, Hilligans had still not warmed to the black haired angel, and was still immensely suspicious. He was civil towards him, but forbid him to enter the kitchen, or Hilligans' work shed unless he or Clow accompanied him. Marcibay didn't actively know why he didn't like the idea of Hei-ying near his shed, or even in the kitchen, he just knew he couldn't allow the child near sharp objects. He had told Clow it was for Hei-ying's own protection, but Hilligans knew this was a lie; it was to protect them from Hei-ying.  
  
Hei-ying now had the appearance of a fifteen or fourteen year old boy, he was actively vocal now, and he could sense the cards. When Clow hid a card, Hei-ying would go straight to the room and pluck it straight out of it's hiding place. Clow used the cards to train him, the Move card would move a small target and Hei-ying would try and catch it. The Dash helped to perfect his flying, it would run off and Hei-ying would have to catch it. At first, Hei-ying wasn't so good at it, the card would weave around trees and Hei-ying would try to follow but often he would fly into an unexpected tree. He was very determined though and quickly perfected the manoeuvre. He made Clow very proud, not only of Hei-ying but of himself. Clow tried not to indulge the selfish thought too often, but this was his first real *living* creation, and he doubted any other magician had ever come up with something so . . . perfect.  
  
  
  
Today, the seventh day of summer, Clow and Hei-ying were practicing hard, in Clow's study. They had yet to perfect Hei-ying's aim. Clow had used the spring as inspiration and Hei-ying was capable of influencing plants, he could grow instantaneous vines out of the ground to hold down any target, and with enough concentration, could create jaded daggers which, when aimed and released, would become painfully sharp thorns. This kind of practice would be taking outside, with the Move and Float cards moving various objects around.  
  
What Clow and Hei-ying were practicing in the study was Hei-ying's levitation. It was a trait that Hei-ying wouldn't be naturally acquainted with, but it was an ability that Clow had given him, in case he didn't want to use his wings, or the ground was unstable. When he had mastered it, Hei- ying would be able to float a few inches off the ground, and move around without walking.  
  
"Why must I learn this?" Hei-ying watched Clow's feet closely as he stepped onto an invisible step.  
  
Clow smiled as he levitated over the chalked line, "Because it will look very imposing and impressive. Appearances can be very important when you want someone to respect you."  
  
"And the ability to float a matter of inches off the ground . . .?" Hei- ying attempted to step onto the air and copy Clow.  
  
". . . Looks very creepy." Clow laughed as Hei-ying's foot landed on the ground. Hei-ying sighed and tried again.  
  
"Is this really necessary?" He sighed.  
  
"Mmm-hmm." Clow nodded, "Try to not think about it. Allow it to be."  
  
Hei-ying paused as he tried again, "Be what?"  
  
Clow smiled, but didn't answer. Hei-ying tried again, but failed. He slammed his foot down in frustration. Clow sat back against his desk, he chuckled, Hei-ying stared at him, "I'm sorry Master . . . but I cannot do it."  
  
Clow smiled again, he stepped on to the rug, and he motioned Hei-ying to join him. Once they were both stood on the crimson carpet, Clow lifted his hand. The carpet began to float.  
  
"Now . . ." Clow stood behind Hei-ying and put his hands on the boy's shoulders. "I want you to close your eyes, I am going to walk you around this carpet to let you get used to the feeling of levitation." He chuckled as Hei-ying stood tensely, the shorter boy's head came to just below Clow's shoulders. Clow leaned forward and whispered into Hei-ying's ear. "Relax. I won't let you fall off the carpet." Clow tried to ignore the slight shiver his breath caused as it brushed against the sensitive skin.  
  
Hei-ying breathed out in an attempt to loosen up, but Clow could still detect a certain amount of tension. He chuckled again; he began to walk them in random directions. After about half an hour of this silent walking, Hei-ying' shoulders completely lost their uneasiness, and Clow knew it was time.  
  
"Hei-ying? Do you know what the sound of a tree falling in the woods makes?" Clow leant forward again, whispering into the pale ear again. He would have just spoken normally, but he couldn't resist the idea of feeling Hei-ying shiver again.  
  
"Yes Master." Hei-ying answered immediately, "It's very loud."  
  
"Good . . . Now, what if a single tree fell, in the middle of woods far from anyone, with no-one around to hear it? Not even the spirits of the glade? . . .What sound would it make then?"  
  
Hei-ying smiled, "Science would call for it to make the same sound as it would if there was someone to hear it."  
  
"Ah . . ." Clow guided Hei-ying to the edge of the caret, "Indeed science would call for that . . . but how would you *know*?"  
  
Hei-ying paused, "It would be . . . science would demand it, tests would prove it."  
  
"But in order to test," Clow pushed Hei-ying closer, "There would have to be someone there to administer it. Then how would you know?"  
  
"I . . ." Hei-ying faulted. His mind was completely focused on the problem; Clow pushed him over and off the edge, they stepped off into the air and floated perfectly. Clow smiled, his uncle had done the same thing to him. He felt so proud of Hei-ying that he turned Hei-ying slowly to face Clow, Clow leaned forward again. Open your eyes, he whispered into the boy's ear. Hei-ying gasped as he realised he was floating; he grabbed Clow's arms tightly as he dipped slightly, but then stabilised by himself. Hei-ying looked up at Clow and smiled. Clow, imperceptivity, lost his concentration and dipped ever so slightly.  
  
The boy he held in his arms was only a few months, possible even weeks away from his maturation. His eyes were still innocent, but Clow had begun to notice a slight awakened tint to his gaze, when Hei-ying thought Clow wasn't looking, he'd stare openly. Clow was aware that Hei-ying's emotions were being to flourish, and that some of those feelings were beginning to become focused on Clow. The now nineteen year-old Clow enjoyed the interest, and lavished his attention on Hei-ying, he stroked his cheek when Hei-ying was disappointed with his performance, he would ruffle his hair when Hei-ying succeed, but he had never allowed himself to hold Hei-ying so closely before. Clow's hands tightened slightly on Hei-ying's slender waist. He was close, any closer and he could easily kiss the boy.  
  
As soon as this last thought crossed Clow's mind, he dropped his hands and fell back to the ground. Hei-ying blinked in surprise at the suddenness of the movement but had come to accept that there were times when The Master was going to do one thing, but seemed to think better of it. He sighed as he floated to the ground, he looked up at Clow, a part of him just wishing that once, just once the Master would give in. //Give into what?// Hei-ying didn't know.  
  
Clow was still staring at him, and then he blinked and shook his head. He rubbed his lips with his hand and paced over to his desk. "I should be teaching you some incantations . . . how to read the cards' fortunes."  
  
He picked up a book and sat in the window seat. He stared at Hei-ying, waiting for him to join him. Hei-ying smiled and stepped into the air; he held his hands behind his back as he levitated over to Clow. He paused before sitting with him, to send Clow one smug look of accomplishment.  
  
Clow laughed, "Well done." He raised his hand, to stroke Hei-ying's cheek. As Clow's hand gently stroke the soft skin Hei-ying's eyes slid shut, a deep purr rumbled in his chest. Clow's voice dropped to a whisper as he moved slightly closer, "Very well done . . ."  
  
  
  
Marcibay stopped in his digging, the storm Clow had sent had done some good work, and his garden was thriving again. He smiled; the garden was going to be beautiful this summer. He picked up his tools, and started to walk up to his shed, it was a beautiful summer day full of heat and freshness. He passed the pond that lay outside his shed, and a glint on the surface drew his eye. He paused as he stared at the water's surface. He felt his body slacken slightly as the water, his tools and bag dropping to the ground, entranced him.  
  
He frowned as the taste of brackish, dirty water bubbling up in his mouth again. The panic wasn't as bad this time, because he knew that as he entered the vision, the feeling of drowning would leave, but there was a feeling of melancholy. The feeling made him feel cold, he shivered and closed his eyes. He could suddenly see the looming dark figure over the water again. Hilligans needed help but the figure was just watching him, the voices returned . . . but there weren't so many anymore.  
  
Just Clow's or possibly Hei-ying's voice . . . he couldn't make it out but again the voice was apologising, "Another . . . someone purer than this tainted soul . . ." Hilligans was in Clow's bedroom again, watching Clow seduce Hei-ying. Marcibay realised that the vision was warning him. Hei- ying was this age, the age he was portrayed as in this vision, he was in reality. It meant that Clow was going to do this to the boy soon. Hilligans turned, not willing to see the young magician, who he *knew* wouldn't do such a thing so soon, succumb to Hei-ying's more physical charms. He suddenly found himself standing in the doorway of a room. It was an unfamiliar room, not that he didn't know where it was, it was about six doors away from Clow's bedroom, and it was decorated differently.  
  
The room was beautiful, full of things Clow had made, either by magic or had handmade. It was a child's room, full of toys, with white curtains with snowflakes and moons, and the bed had the same patterned sheets. Hilligans stared, a large winged lion leapt on to the bed trying to console a sobbing white haired child. The child was yelling that he hated someone, while the lion attempted to soothe the young'un. Hilligans felt a movement behind him and turned. It was Hei-ying; he was watching the two with a manic gaze, a pair of silver scissors twirled in his hands. He turned away and walked down the corridor. The vision began to warp, and swirl but the lion's voice was still clearly heard as he issued a warning to the little white haired boy. "No matter what he says, no matter what he does, keep away from him . . . I don't think he's . . . I don't think Hei-ying's . . ."  
  
There was another voice, it was Clow's, and it overlapped the lion's slightly. Their combined voice continued as the feeling of drowning return and the dark figure above the water stared down mercilessly. "Keep away from him . . . I was so wrong, I'm so sorry . . . I don't think he's . . . so wrong, and now . . . I don't think Hei-ying's . . . I'm going to lose you . . . sane anymore . . . I love you, my beloved pure angel . . ."  
  
The water surface began to fade, and Hilligans suddenly realised that---  
  
His eyes slid open, and for a few moments he didn't know who he was, why he was here, only that above him was sky, below him was earth. He just stared at the sky, taking in it's blueness. Then his mind started to function again, the vision was a warning. He couldn't remember many of the facts but the feeling of urgency made him sit up. Leaving his tools where they lay Hilligans made his way to the mansion. Clow had to told, and told soon.  
  
  
  
Hilligans was soon outside Clow's upstairs study; he pushed the door open without knocking. Clow had often told him that he didn't need to knock; and that if he persisted in knocking then Clow would ignore him. The study seemed too quiet for the lesson Clow was supposed to be giving Hei-ying. "Laddie?" He murmured before his eyes settled on the window seat.  
  
Clow and Hei-ying were simply sitting very close to each other, Hei-ying's young eyes were closed and Hilligans could hear the boy's purring from the doorway. Clow had his hand under the younger child's chin, his own dark eyes sliding shut as he leant forward. Hilligans watched in rapt horror as Clow took the chance to deepen the kiss, he pulled the shorter boy closer and wrapped his arms around boy's waist. It was only when Clow broke the kiss to draw a shaky breath before resuming their embrace, Hilligans snapped out of his shock. "Laddie!" He barked. Clow pushed Hei-ying away in surprise, Hei-ying's own jade green eyes displayed slight disappointment that they had been interrupted, he frowned at Hilligans.  
  
Hilligans ignored him, as he glared at Clow, "Laddie," he said, his voice dropping to a threatening tone, "A word . . ." his eyes narrowed with disapproval, ". . .*Now*."  
  
With the single commanded, he turned on his heel and stalked out of the room. Hei-ying stared after his Master, as he stood and left the room silently, only pausing at the door to look back at him.  
  
  
  
As soon as the door had slid shut, "What the hell do you think you are doing, Laddie? The boy is younger than you. . . we have *flowers* older than him!" Hilligans spat, disappointment evident in his voice.  
  
At first Clow couldn't answer, he was upset at himself for his loss of control, and that Hilligans had seen it. "I don't know, I just couldn't—"  
  
"Well thy better start learning how to resist your urges!" He pointed at the study's door, "*That* isn't the right one!"  
  
Clow's head snapped up, "How did you know?"  
  
"My vision came back and it was a little more clearer this time . . ." Hilligans looked at Clow, "I could hear you . . . you were saying that you had been wrong, you had chosen the wrong one, and now you were losing the one you loved the most!" Clow looked down then at the study as he absorbed this, Hilligans continued regardless, "And there's more, I think that he'll tell you one day that you've chosen the wrong one, I keep hearin' 'someone purer than this tainted soul' . . . don't you see Laddie?! Hei-ying isn't the right one. . . maybe that'll be him telling you *himself* that he ain't the right one. . ."  
  
Clow hung his head, he was thoroughly ashamed of himself, Hei-ying wasn't even matured enough to look the same age as Clow. Hilligans could be right; maybe he was supposed to wait for the white haired angel, but the attraction he felt towards Hei-ying . . . it was like nothing he had ever felt before.  
  
Hilligans grasped him by the shoulders, "Laddie . . . I know it's hard. . . but. . ." he said calmer now, "Promise me sum'in . . .?"  
  
Clow looked at him, his dark eyes were full of remorse, he nodded.  
  
"Promise me that you will leave him alone . . . if, when the other one comes, you find you'd rather 'ave Hei-ying . . . then you can make that choice, but wait an' see . . . eh? Wait . . . or sum'in bad's gonna 'appen, I can feel it in me old bones . . . sum'in bad's gonna 'appen."  
  
Clow nodded mutely, and Hilligans patted him on the shoulder, "Good lad, good. Thy won't regret it . . ."  
  
The old man turned and strode back to the stairs, Clow called after him, "Thank you Mister Hilligans!"  
  
He paused and turned; Hilligans smiled slightly, "Aye . . ." a chill took to his witchin' bones, and somehow he knew. . .  
  
". . .Take care now, Clow." He said before striding down the stairs.  
  
Clow blinked, Hilligans had never used his first name before. . .  
  
  
  
Hei-ying was sprawled over the window seat; he was trying to concentrate on the passage of incantations Clow had been trying to teach him, but every so often his fingers would press against his lips. The motion didn't stir up the same amount of emotion as when the Master had touched them, but it served as a reminder. He had read about this action, it was called a kiss. He smiled; they had been kissing, Hei-ying giggled slightly. It made him feel warm, and slightly breathless.  
  
It felt like the first time Clow had helped him bathe, sitting here in the warm sunlight, Hei-ying remembered the first time Clow had lead him into the steamy bathroom. He hadn't understood why Clow was making him do this, but it was something he had come to enjoy. Lately though, after become capable of bathing himself, he began to lie in the hot bath thinking about the Master and wish he was with him. He didn't understand why he would think about being near the Master all the time, but he'd never dare think that the Master wanted him the same way.  
  
Hei-ying shook his head, and glanced at the door, he couldn't make out what was being said, but he could hear Mister Hilligans, he was yelling at the Master. Hei-ying frowned, no one was supposed to yell at the Master, he *was* the Master after all.  
  
He sat up as the door opened and Clow stepped back in. Clow looked up at him, Hei-ying was sitting there, excitement and expectance was written all over his face, Clow sighed and closed the door. He walked over to his desk and shrugged out of his robes' overcoat. He slung it over his desk as he picked up his book of incantations, "Let's try that last incantation again, shall we?"  
  
Hei-ying cocked his head, but said nothing, and began to recite the incantation. Clow nodded as Hei-ying said it without a fault. Well done. He glanced out the window, Hilligans was walking back to his work shed, he sighed again, the old man was right. He would have to wait, to find out which angel was the right one . . . His true love. Clow had to admit, the feelings he felt towards Hei-ying were a little on the more physical side, rather than the emotional.  
  
He flicked a page, ". . .And now the next one."  
  
  
  
Once his lesson was over, Clow shushed Hei-ying out of his study, claiming he had some important work to do. Before Hei-ying closed the door, he saw Clow throw down his quill, and rise to stare out the window. He looked like he was thinking hard about something. Hei-ying glided down the corridor, he too was thinking, thinking that Mister Hilligans had something to do with the fact Clow didn't even lay a finger on him for the rest of the lesson. He wondered what the old man had said that would cause this. He flew over the banister and landed on the entrance hall's floor. He made his way into the garden. He'd made up his mind, he wanted to know what Mister Hilligans had done, to ruin Clow's mood, and to stop the nice warm giddy feeling Hei- ying had been experiencing.  
  
He found Hilligans storing his tools in his shed, Hei-ying stood by the water edge of the pond. "Mister Hilligans?"  
  
Marcibay stepped out of his shed, and looked at Hei-ying warily, "Aye?"  
  
"What did you say to the Master?"  
  
"What business is it o' thy's?"  
  
Hei-ying paused, it really wasn't any of his business, but still . . . "I want to know."  
  
"If thee mus' know . . ." Hilligans nodded knowingly, "I don't trust thee . . . not an inch further than I could throw thee. An' I told Laddie that much . . . I know what thy are up t' . . ."  
  
"Oh, really?" Hei-ying snapped; the man was irritating him now, "What might I be up to now?"  
  
"Thy aren't the one for the Laddie . . . there's another, he's th' right one."  
  
Hei-ying was shocked; he felt his lip curl in anger. No one would be right for the Master, there was only one and that Hei-ying. Hilligans saw this thought cross Hei-ying's face. "Aye, you try an' think otherwise, but soon sum'un better than thee will come along an' Clow will come t' his senses."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Thy aren't right," he tapped his head, "Ain't right in the head, an' I can see it. . . but you've been blindin' Clow so 'e canne see it. But I do . . . one day, mark my words, he's gonna see sense and send you back t' whatever hell you came from."  
  
The idea of being sent away from Clow made Hei-ying even angrier. How dare this pitiful old human suggest that Clow would ever send his most perfect creation away from him? He glanced at the mansion, Hei-ying couldn't risk the old man influencing Clow anymore . . . he had already persuaded Clow to stop kissing him and touching him, he might try and get Clow to send him away entirely. He stepped onto the air, and levitated onto the water. "He wouldn't do that . . . He loves me."  
  
Hilligans snorted at the arrogant child, "Thy'll see."  
  
Hei-ying held out his hand, "Perhaps it is because you and I have not spent much time together, not as much as The Master and I have spent together . . ." he smiled hopefully, "Perhaps we should try to get along for the Master's sake."  
  
Hilligans looked at Hei-ying's outstretched hand then at Hei-ying, he stepped closer to the water's edge and stared up at the black haired boy. "One day," he repeated, "I've seen it in a vision, one day another, sum'un better than thy's ruined soul will take thy place in Clow's heart . . . an' I look forward t' that day."  
  
Hei-ying's eyes narrowed as the old man turned his back on him, "Then I will have to stop you from ever seeing another day."  
  
Hilligans laughed cynically, as he trudged up the bank, unaware of the water vines stirring in the water's murky depths. He was, though, suddenly aware that he couldn't sense Clow anymore, not even the cards. He spun and looked at Hei-ying, the floating demon's eyes were glowing a fierce green. He was blocking Hilligans' senses . . .  
  
"What art thee doin'?"  
  
The boy stared at him, "Making sure you don't take The Master away from me."  
  
Hilligans eyes widen as he suddenly was pulled to the ground, there was something wrapped around his legs and it was dragging him into the water. He stared at his feet in horror, the waterweeds were tight around his ankles, "Let me go!" He demanded. "You filthy beast! Let me go!"  
  
Hei-ying silently folded his arms, and stared at him. Hilligans scrabbled at the water bank, but the dry soil just broke away in his hands.  
  
He frowned as the taste of brackish, dirty water flowed into his mouth again, he sudden understood why his visions had begun and finished with the sense of drowning. It was how he was going to die. Hei-ying was drowning him. Despite knowing he wasn't going to survive the attack, he started to struggle frantically as the vines wrapped around his torso, he tried to hold his breath as they squeezed his lungs trying to force the last breath of air from them. Hei-ying stared down on the old man, watching as the pitiful old man struggled against his magic enhanced vines, there was no way he would ever escape.  
  
The man's wide eyes stared up at Hei-ying under the surface, as he made no motion to help him. A vine wrapped around his neck and started to squeeze. If the old man wouldn't relinquish his last breath, then Hei-ying would strangle it out of him, how dare he try to come between him and The Master! Now he was paying for it. Hei-ying smiled as the man's mouth popped open and the bubbles rose to the surface.  
  
"No. More. Distractions . . ."  
  
  
  
Clow was so deep in thought that he almost didn't notice that Hilligans' aura was fading away, at first he assumed that the old man had taken the coach out to the town, but realise that if he was then he would have come to tell Clow. It was then he saw Hei-ying flying desperately to his window. He threw it open and a soaked Hei-ying fell through the open port. He lay panting and almost sobbing on the ground. "Hei-ying! What happened?"  
  
"It's Mister Hilligans, Master . . . he . . . he just fell into the pond, I didn't know what to do and then he sank under the water and all these bubbles floated to the surface . . ."  
  
Clow had called out his Fly card, and was out the window before Hei-ying had finished, Hilligans was in trouble!  
  
Hei-ying flew panting besides him, "I tried to help him Master, but I was too late."  
  
Clow squeezed his eyes shut as Hei-ying's horrible account continued, he could feel tears welling up again, //Not Hilligans! Please not Mister Hilligans!// the pond came into sight and so did Hilligans. Clow prayed it was like the last time he had thought the man was dead, he was just unconscious. //Please just be unconscious.//  
  
"Mister Hilligans!" Clow cried, as he landed and ran over to Hilligans side. He dropped to his knees and frantically begun to search for a pulse. Clow began to cry, "Mister Hilligans!"  
  
The man's weather worn face was ashen, he wasn't breathing. "Mister Hilligans. . . please. . . wake up!"  
  
Hei-ying stood a little way off, and watched as his Master tried to breath life back into the old man's body, "Master. . ." he said softly, "He's not breathing. . ." but Clow wasn't paying attention, "Master. . .? He's not breathing, I made sure of it."  
  
Clow blinked up at Hei-ying, the boy was still new to language and must have got the words slightly wrong, he turned back to Hilligans and started to tremble, he didn't know what to do. He didn't know that this was going to happen, there was no vision, no warning . . .  
  
"Marcibay . . . Marcibay please! Please wake up!" Clow lay his head down on Hilligans' chest, "Please; please just wake up . . . MARCIBAAAAY!!" Clow closed his eyes as he sobbed and didn't see the small smile that formed on Hei-ying's lips, he knew Clow was hurt now, but soon he would be happy again, because Hei-ying would be there for him . . . and then he would realise that they would have no more distractions.  
  
  
  
That night Clow did everything he knew, ever bit of magic he had ever heard of trying to bring life back to Marcibay's body, but not even the cards worked. The months that followed were filled with a deep sadness, and Clow tried to make himself busy with anything and everything else. After Hilligans' funeral, Clow dedicated himself to the garden, doing minor chores, refusing to leave anything, that Hilligans had worked so hard to keep alive, die. Hei-ying was patient, his lessons stopped, and Clow ignored the cards completely. In his view, they had failed to do what they had been created for . . . they couldn't keep Hilligans alive, what was the point of them?  
  
Clow became very pale, despite the long hours he spent in the garden, and a silence fell upon the house. Clow never said a word, he hardly even looked up from the things he did, he would completely focus on his cooking or his sewing or the garden. But still Hei-ying was patient, knowing that once Clow had realised that they were alone now, he would go back to his old self.  
  
But as the months past, and Hei-ying grew into the fully matured angel of Clow's dreams, Clow didn't returned to his old self, in fact he became angrier. The boy with the blue hair, or the Cardcaptor, neither had appeared in any vision that told him that he was going to lose Marcibay. He felt betrayed by them, they had appeared whenever it had something to do with the cards, but not when it had something to do with Clow's closest friend. He started to dislike his cards, he felt used, and unneeded. He had created the damned things, and now it didn't matter about him, or anyone around him, as long as the cards survived that was all right then, never mind that Clow had lost Hilligans.  
  
Anger started to consume Clow Reed; he hardly practiced his magic anymore. The house seemed to lose life, the silence almost so thick it seemed to choke the grounds. Clow put away his magic robes, opting for black clothes, tight funeral suits, with high stiff collars, and a tall black hat, to cover his now harshly pulled back hair, it was now pulled back and tied into the traditional Chinese style ponytails. His clothes matched his now permanent expression of a mixture of hate, anger and sorrow.  
  
He created new clothes for Hei-ying, they were black, a waistcoat, leggings that wouldn't interfere with his flying. The only colour was that of gold on the waistcoat, a jade green sash for the waist, and the jade linings. At the bottom of the coat tails, little stars hung off. They would travel to the town dressed like this, it hadn't changed that much since Clow had first visited it. However Clow wasn't in the mood to sightsee any more, he simple travelled to the town to give Hei-ying experience of the outside world. Once half an hour lapsed, they would turn and travel back to the mansion.  
  
Not a single word spoken between them.  
  
  
  
The decision to create the Clow book came one night when he was thinking about how he could punish the future for not warning him about the death. The cards were worried, they didn't like the idea of being sealed in a book, but not even the Move broke through Clow's resolve. He was emotionless as he sealed the book, slamming it shut with a cold glare and then locked it with his magic key. If the future didn't want to warn him about these things, then it couldn't have it's precious cards. Simple as that.  
  
He slid the book onto a shelf in his library and retired to his bedroom.  
  
It was that same night Hei-ying's patience ran out. A knock at his door made Clow look up from the book he had been reading, "Come in." he barked rather harshly.  
  
Hei-ying entered, carrying his customary candle. "It's late, Hei-ying," Clow spat angered for some unknown reason.  
  
Hei-ying paused at his Master's tone and looked down, //Perhaps now is not the time . . .//  
  
Clow in the mean time glanced out the window, the night was perfectly clear, no storm at all. His anger at the visions still bubbled, as he looked back at Hei-ying. The black haired angel was in his dressing gown, loosely tied at the waist. As he fidgeted with his candle, Clow suddenly thought of another way he could get back at the visions . . . he could disobey them.  
  
"Hei-ying . . ." he smirked as he ordered, ". . .Come here."  
  
  
  
Clow lay back, his dark hair unbound and spilling all over the white, silk pillow. It was soft but not as soft as his new lover's lips. Clow smiled, and opened his eyes. Deep jade eyes looked back, black hair, dark as the feathers of a raven, pooled with Clow's. The night sky was clear, the stars shone brightly, and the moonlight simple lit the land with a soft sapphire blanket of light. His hand shook slightly as he brushed two fingers over his creation's thin black eyebrow.  
  
The magical being hummed, and purred at the cool touch of Clow reed's hand. "Master . . ." The jade eyes slid shut. "Master . . . Command me . . . Anything . . ."  
  
Clow derived a secret pleasure from his creation, hearing him murmured so obediently. His cold fingers slipped down the pale creatures cheek, "Mine . . ." he murmured.  
  
"Yours, Master." The being whispered, sending surreptitious thrills down Clow's spine. The jade eyes open to reveal a deep glow; a sign of the being's magic and pleasure, "Yours . . . to command . . ."  
  
A satisfied smirk grew on Clow's lips, he was glad the obedience spell had worked, the being would crave to obey every order that passed the young magician's lips. "Kiss me . . . everywhere . . ."  
  
Clow laughed as the being kissed it's way down his body. Soft lips sometimes brushing light as a feather, sometimes a cool wet tongue would slip out.  
  
//My creation// Clow thought satisfied, //Mine// he was proud of himself, such an accomplishment at the mere age of nineteen. He had created an angel, with the darkest black hair, deep jade green eyes, soft smile. Everything Clow found the most desirable, the angel had. The young magician had never felt desire for any male before, but this magical creature was his to do with as he pleased. Clow groaned, as the creature got lower, he twined his hands with the long hair, hair that was usually tied back in a tight tail. Clow never really knew why he had created the creature. He lifted his head to gaze at the black haired boy. Sensing the heated gaze of his Master, the jade eyes slid open and gazed back; he smiled around his task and returned to it more reverently.  
  
Clow groaned again, his head falling back onto the pillow, did he really care that the creature had been created for absolutely no purpose? That after ten months of it's maturation, the best reason Clow could come up with was that he had created the creature for no other reason then that Clow reed had the power to do such a thing?  
  
His fingers whitened as they tighten their grip on the boy's head, his face flushed, growing paler than before. His pale lips pressed together tightly as he fought the moan that wanted out, his whole upper body paling as the heated blood rushed to . . . a more interesting locale. His stomach tightened, his shoulders tense. Pushing back hard into the pillow, Clow's back arched, "Hei-ying!" He hissed through his teeth, the pleasure almost to much to bare, //So close . . .// Clow's clouded mind sang, so close and he burned to be closer.  
  
The jaded eyes snapped open, and the magical boy instantly sat back on his heels. Soft lips coated and glistening in the moonlight with saliva. "Yes, Master?" He asked, with an innocence that made Clow raise himself on his elbows and grinned predatorily.  
  
Clow laughed, languidly. "Hei-ying . . . come here. . ."  
  
A flick of his wings and the dark haired boy floated over his Master, "Are you in pain? Did I do something wrong? Do you wish me to cease Master?"  
  
Clow blinked slowly, that satisfied smirk returned to his lip, //My creation . . .// "Kiss me." He commanded and his creation obeyed without question. When Clow pulled on the floating being's shoulders, to bring him closer, the being lowered himself, and made his large white wings disappear with an emerald glow. Hei-ying would do anything Clow asked, without resistance, without question.  
  
Years later, this was a trait Clow would come to regret giving Hei-ying.  
  
  
  
As the moonlight spilled it's woven azure glow over their bodies, Clow wrapped his arms around the well toned stomach he had created for Hei-ying, the young magician pulled the dark haired angel down, as they knelt together. Clow finally took the last trace of Hei-ying's innocence; and his own, from their relationship. Hei-ying's head lolled back, as Clow rested his chin on the pale boy's bare shoulder. His jade eyes screwed shut tightly as he hissed with pleasurable pain, and painful pleasure.  
  
His pale hands slide softly over Clow's arms, sometimes pinching his fingernails into the soft skin, as they tightened about his waist. His brow drew into a deep frown, "Oh . . . Master . . ." he nearly sobbed.  
  
"Say . . ." Clow spat, "Say my name . . ."  
  
"Ungh . . ." Hei-ying's head fell forward, "Master . . . I can't . . . I mustn't."  
  
Clow loosen one of his hands, he trailed it up Hei-ying's back, and meshed it in the raven black hair over the creature's neck. He pulled it harshly, snapping Hei-ying's head back. The boy's Adam apple bobbed, as Clow hissed into his ear, "Say it!"  
  
"Master . . ." Hei-ying groaned, then took a deep shuddering breath as Clow pulled harder, "Master . . ."  
  
Clow grinned, dark eyes keenly watching the boy's conflicted face, "Say my name . . ."  
  
He let Hei-ying's head loll forward again, as he whispered, "Master . . . Master Clow Reed." His jade eyes became unfocused, and slid shut against the waves of unfamiliar emotion.  
  
Clow smiled, his own dark eyes sliding shut, and he pressed his sweaty brow against the nape of his creation's neck. He was content to hear Hei-ying whimper and grunt under his Master's ministrations. Ever so often, his creation would have the presence of mind to utter Clow's name over and over again, celebrating in his newfound gift. He could call his Master by his name.  
  
Clow could hear his own deep panting breathes, and he could hear the blood rushing about his ears. He could hear himself reply in meaningless phrases, Hei-ying's name, the odd blaspheme, and insignificant sweet nothings.  
  
Sweet nothings " . . . Hei-ying . . ."  
  
Years later, Clow would wish he'd held his tongue . . .  
  
Sweet nothings " . . . Hei-ying . . . you must . . ."  
  
Years later, Clow would wish he'd paid more attention to the orders he was issuing . . .  
  
Sweet nothings " . . . love me, Hei-ying . . . crave me . . ."  
  
Years later, Clow would wish he'd save his love for someone else . . .  
  
Sweet nothings " . . . me, Hei-ying . . . and no-one else . . ."  
  
Years later . . . Clow would wish . . .  
  
  
  
Sweet nothings . . .  
  
  
  
  
  
"Yes, Master . . . anything . . ."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Well . . . that was . . . crap!  
  
DrM: How could you! I slaved over that!! I tried really hard not to be gross out but kinda stylish at the same time! You big meanie! That's my first piece of lemony goodness EVER!! You complete ingrate!! That's it! You are never getting it on with Yue!! EVER!!  
  
Clow: [falls to knees and screams to the heavens] NOOOO!!!  
  
DrM: . . .At least in my fics. . . [Turns to readers] please tell me what you think . . . I don't mind you criticising my lemony piece, I know I kinda wimped out on it. . .  
  
Clow: How come they get to complain and I don't?  
  
DrM: Cos. . . I could write you out of existence that's why!  
  
Clow: Oh, now, that's just MEAN!  
  
DrM: Damned right!  
  
Clow: [reads the rest of the chapter] You bitch! You killed Hilligans!  
  
DrM: like you couldn't see it a mile away! Besides it wasn't me! it was Hei- ying!  
  
Hei-ying: yeah. . . but Clow doesn't know that. . . do you, sugar dumpling- a-ling?  
  
Clow: not a clue, hunny-bunny-wunny!  
  
DrM: [deadpan] I think. . . I'm gonna be sick! The cutesy name-calling ends here! This far. [Makes sweepy motions with hand] No further!  
  
Clow: but I wuuve him oh so muchy-wuchy!  
  
DrM: [spams herself in the forehead and starts to beat fists against head]  
  
Ghost of mister Hilligans: Please R&R!! 


	10. Keroberos

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me! And: while the explicit part was in part eight, the rest of this fic will have references to Shounen Ai feelings, if you ain't a happy hippie like me, believing that love can cross all boarders then. . . what are you still doin' here, my friend? Free will and peace is brought to you, use it wisely, practice your will and leave. . . or open your mind, man, transcend and give it a go. . . you might like it. . .  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Nine: Keroberos  
  
  
  
Clow lifted the mansion's spell; it was no longer out of the land's time. A decade past and; while Hei-ying grew happier and happier with their situation, Clow became unhappy and isolated. He wished he had someone to talk to, he found he couldn't really talk to Hei-ying. The obedience spell that he had put on the angel had been too strong, Clow realised this about four years after Hilligans' death, Hei-ying was almost incapable of arguing with Clow, and even though Clow had given him permission to use his name, Hei-ying couldn't say it without saying 'Master' before hand.  
  
Hei-ying, on the other hand, thought their life together was perfect, Clow still kissed him, still slept with him, and he assumed that must have meant that Clow was deeply in love with him. He was wrong; Clow actually regretted it, he only continued because it gave him some momentary distraction from the increasing feeling of desolation.  
  
Clow's despair grew worse over the winter of the tenth year, and he used Hei-ying more and more often hoping that the night he had dreamed and had seen in his visions would occur. The vision of the loving angel, that tender loving angel who adored Clow, and made Clow feel so happy was the only thing giving Clow hope during these cold winters. Every snowstorm, Clow sat in bed patiently waiting for Hei-ying to enact the vision, but every snowstorm passed with no sign of Hei-ying . . . Clow's regret started to get stronger, but the more he regretted it, the more he used Hei-ying to bury the desolated feelings. He was getting older, and he was lonely. He wondered about the other visions, and wondered if he'd ever meet any of these other people. He began to wonder about the Cardcaptor and the boy with the blue hair again; about the magical creatures he had seen.  
  
He spent hours in his study, staring out the window across the snow-covered grounds. The grounds seemed to mimic his sadness, he was so lonely, and Hei- ying wasn't company enough. As the tenth year started, Clow would stare out of his study's window, silent tears rolling down his face unchecked. The cards lay sleeping in their book, he didn't even try to call on them anymore, since he had sealed them. At first, whenever he nearer the book, they would respond by making the book glow, but this made him angry, he had sealed them there because he had hated them. They began to realise this and, rather than risk making him angry enough to destroy them, one by one each card fell into a deep sleep, the book's glow getting weaker and weaker. Until one day he noticed, it didn't light at all, at the time he thought this was good, but now . . .  
  
Clow buried his head in his knees . . . at only twenty-nine years of age, Clow Reed, the most powerful magician of both the spheres of Western and Eastern magic, was alone, trapped in a lifeless mansion, surrounded by silence . . .  
  
  
  
Summer rolled in, and Clow was working in the garden again, he found that by doing such manual tasks he was distracted from his loneliness. He tried not to think about it but it was now almost ten years to the day that Hilligans had died. Clow sighed and wiped his brow; the tenth anniversary of his last vision had been and gone. Clow wondered if he was still capable of magic, but then thought better of that; of course he was still capable of magic. He had to be or Hei-ying would be dying. He rolled his eyes; Hei- ying was starting to get a little frustrating. It was always, "Yes, Master Clow", "No, Master Clow," "I completely agreed, Master Clow." It was never, "Now listen here!", "That's wrong!" Or even "Don't be ridiculous!", "You're an idiot!"  
  
Clow smiled slightly and laughed, "I'm lamenting the fact he doesn't have the ability to call me an idiot . . ." He paused, and looked up at the sky. It was midday. "I guess I better have something to eat."  
  
Clow's anger at the future had dissipated somewhat, he realised that the cycle of life had to continue and that if the future had warned him, then Clow would have tried everything in his power to prevent the event. "Perhaps it was necessary to the future . . ." Clow muttered as he paused and stared at the pond. It had claimed the life of his friend and was the site of his last vision. He hadn't been near it since Hilligans' death, but for some reason, the still water seemed to capture his attention today.  
  
Clow set his tools down as he stood on the water's edge. He knelt just as he had the last time he had had a vision. He wondered briefly what he would do if he saw the boy with the blue hair and the ever smug look. He sighed and leant forward. There was nothing there . . . not even his own reflection. Clow stared at the water, the reflection of the sky though . . . it was nearing sundown in the reflection. He almost sat up again, when there was a slight ripple in the water; it was strange because the ripple was on the underside of the water. Clow looked into the water in surprise as he saw several people staring back at him. They all looked very tired, as if they had just came out of some sort of battle. Again the impossible shadows hid their eyes, the future still concealing their identities from him.  
  
The boy with the blue hair was there, and there wasn't a trace of a superior gaze, in fact he seemed to realise that Clow wouldn't appreciate any smugness.  
  
The boy turned to the girl, Clow had dubbed her the Cardcaptor, and he was speaking to her and the others and gesturing at the water. The butterfly girl, the laughing one, pushed through them to peer into the water's surface, she was just about to press a finger against the water, when the white haired angel stopped her. He stared into the water, and was very still as if he was afraid any movement on his side would cause Clow to disappear. Clow smiled, he had the sudden urge to play. He sat back on his heels very suddenly, and held his hands over his mouth, to prevent the giggle. He could imagine the look of horror on the silent angel's . . . Clow looked up suddenly, on the other side of the pond the boy with the blue hair reappeared; he motioned Clow to lean back over the water. Clow smiled and complied, the group were all leaning closer now, looking for him. Clow waved as he reappeared to them. The angel sighed slightly, the Cardcaptor giggled and turned to her purple haired friend, she motioned at the water asking a question. The girl was pointing at Clow with a very strange device, he was intrigued by it. He shuffled so he lay on his stomach, interested by the thing she was pointing at him. The blue haired boy waved at the girl and motioned her to put the thing away; he mouthed very clearly what he was saying. 'He doesn't know what it is, please . . . This is important, we can't let him be distracted by the camera'. The people with him stared at him questioningly, but Clow realised that the boy knew Clow couldn't hear him. He beckoned the boy, and mouthed 'How do you know that I can't hear you?'  
  
The boy smiled knowingly, but didn't answer, instead turned to answer the boy with the green robes, who was staring curiously at him. Clow stared at the boy, there was something so familiar about the clothes he was wearing . . . Clow's eyes widened as he recognised his uncle's magic robes, it even had the bells, and the bright orange sash. He looked at the blue haired boy instinctively, who had turned back to Clow. He nodded, knowing that Clow wanted to know if this boy was a Li. As the blue haired boy turned to explain the silent conversation, Clow stared at the Li boy, who had a deep frown set in his young face, he looked like a miniature version of his uncle Hei-ying! //How cute!// . . . He was Clow's descendant then . . . Clow laughed.  
  
The butterfly girl pointed at the water, 'What's he laughing at?' she asked.  
  
The boy motioned at Clow to mouth his response. Clow pointed at the Li boy . . . 'He's my cute little descendant!'  
  
The Li boy's eyes widened and he glared at the blue haired boy who laughed, he shrugged, and then said something to the others that made them stand and leave. The white haired angel was reluctant, but the blue haired boy shushed him away. He bid the Cardcaptor and the cheerful lion to stay. He stared down at the water, and motioned the lion over first; the Cardcaptor crouched on the other side. 'What are you doing?' she asked as she stared at Clow, who was as equally interested.  
  
The blue haired boy covered his mouth with his hand as he explained; he didn't want Clow to know what he was saying. Whatever he said shocked the lion, who looked from the blue haired boy to the water and back again. The boy motioned the lion to lean closer, as he did the shadows on the lion's face began to clear.  
  
Clow smiled, the lion had sparkling gold eyes, and they were filled with joy, a love of life. The lion smiled widely, 'Konbanwa!' he mouthed.  
  
Clow paused, glanced at the boy who nodded, 'Who are you?' Clow mouthed.  
  
The lion looked at the boy for a translation, again his eyes widened with shock. 'NANI?!' could be clearly read. 'It's me!' the lion gestured at himself, 'MEEEEEEEE!!!'  
  
Clow glanced rapidly from the boy to the Cardcaptor; it was the Cardcaptor who answered his question, 'Keroberos' she mouthed, 'Keehh—Row- bear-ros! Keroberos!'  
  
"Keroberos?" Clow murmured aloud, it was one of the three names he had considered for Hei-ying.  
  
'Keroberos!' The lion nodded enthusiastically, and pointed at himself, 'Keroberos! I'm the guardian beast of the—' the blue haired boy clamped a hand over the lion's mouth and shook his head, Clow spoke aloud, "What? What was he going to say? Guardian? Guardian beast of the what?"  
  
The boy smiled regrettably, he leaned over to the lion and whispered words into his large ear, and the lion frowned then mouthed at Clow 'You will have to figure it out for yourself'.  
  
Clow frowned, "What is it? When will I have to figure it out? When will I see you?"  
  
The lion listened once more; he looked as if he was holding his breath, the evident importance of the vision finally sinking into him. He gazed at Clow before looking over at his shoulder, at the white haired angel, 'What about him?'  
  
The boy shook his head, and gestured to the water. The lion with the golden eyes stared at the blue haired boy, then at the white haired angel, and finally at Cardcaptor. He turned his sparkling gaze at Clow, and smiled warmly, 'Whenever you decide it . . .'  
  
Before Clow could protest, the boy allowed the gathered group get one more look at Clow. The angel stared at him hopefully, and Clow stared back wondering who he was. The blue haired boy lifted his hand to strike the water, "No! Please! Wait!"  
  
The boy didn't, and the people faded away. Clow stared at the water for a while, //the guardian beast of the Mansion? No. . . The guardian beast of the . . .// he stood, his mind still asking what it was the lion was guarding. It couldn't have been Clow; he was going to be dead by the time the Cardcaptor released the cards.  
  
  
  
The next few weeks saw an improvement in Clow's mood, he began to hum and sing again, as he walked along the corridors of his empty home. Hei-ying was, at first, unnerved by it, having gotten used to the sombre Clow. He began to think that Clow had come to truly accept their situation, and was going to start devoting himself to Hei-ying completely.  
  
He was wrong again, as Clow started to return to his old self, he also began to pay a little less attention to Hei-ying. Not as if he was ignoring Hei-ying or anything, it was just little things began to stop happening, Clow stopped appearing in Hei-ying's bedroom every night that he couldn't sleep, their encounters became less physical, and Clow wouldn't simply take what he wanted, they would just talk. Hei-ying didn't understand why Clow had suddenly lost interest in the things they had been doing over the last ten years. It couldn't be that Hei-ying had grown to be unattractive; he still maintained the look of a boy no older than eighteen at the most. It couldn't be Clow, because Clow was only just twenty-nine.  
  
While Clow's renewed interest in life confused Hei-ying, Clow was trying to figure out what the guardian beast, Keroberos, was the guardian beast of. He thought back to the encounter at the pond, he'd gotten over the shock that he had interacted with the vision, and was now analysing every aspect of it for clues.  
  
Even now, late one hot summer night, Clow sat up in bed. He was unable to read, the lion's golden eyes still clear in his mind, the lion was gold yellow, he had white wings like Hei-ying, and blood red stones on his helmet. He looked very fierce and handsome, but Clow just knew he was a big- hearted, warm being. Clow thought about the others, but always the boy with the blue hair seemed to become the most clear.  
  
The blue haired boy intrigued Clow; he knew what Clow was doing, he knew what he was asking, and that he couldn't hear him. The boy also knew what things Clow wouldn't understand and made sure that they weren't there to distract him. 'Please . . . this is important, we can't let him be distracted . . .' the boy knew things he shouldn't have. Clow knew this wasn't what he was supposed to be trying to figure out; the boy wasn't necessary to the overall plan yet.  
  
He was supposed to be figuring out the purpose of the lion and when he figured out what the lion was supposed to be, Clow knew that *something* would click into place and make sense . . . //but what is it? What is that lion the guardian beast of? Keroberos . . . one of the three names I was thinking of calling Hei-ying . . . this must mean that *I* create Keroberos . . . but why?!// Clow sighed and got out of bed. It wasn't helping so he padded along to his study quietly. "Keroberos . . . who or what are you supposed to be guarding?"  
  
A strange noise made Clow stop suddenly, it was late and Hei-ying was in bed, Clow could sense him in his room. The strange noise sounded again, and Clow mentally kicked himself for leaving his magic key in the drawer of his study's desk. //Is it some kind of intruder?// Clow wondered, //is someone after something in my study?// he paused by the stairs and gazed at the large wooden doors. What could he do if it was an intruder? He had foolishly locked his magic key in the drawer, and even if he had the staff he couldn't do much except bonk the intruder on the head with it because he had rather foolishly locked the cards in the book. It was now Clow started to berate himself for sealing the cards away.  
  
"Baka! Idiot! Moron!" Clow whispered as he continued to stare at his study door, "Congratulations Clow, the thief is probably going to take your cards and sell them as toys . . . and then what are you going to do?"  
  
Clow's eyes widened as a single cherry blossom floated past his face, it floated and danced in front of him. He caught it in his hand and looked at it. It was a vision, the strange noise, everything, he turned and the Cardcaptor stood nervously behind him, she was clutching a metal rod, a baton of some kind, and was staring rather fearfully at the study door. She could hear the noise as well. He followed her as she plucked up the courage to enter the room. As soon as he stepped over the threshold though, the Cardcaptor vanished. Her purpose was to get him into the room he realised; that done, the strange noise continued louder.  
  
Clow closed his eyes and tried to listen to where the noise was coming from. He stood in the middle of the room for ten minutes before he realised it was coming from the small library of books Clow kept in this room.  
  
He stepped over to the three isles, the noise loudest from the middle one. Clow realised with a shock that that was where the Clow book was. As he drew closer, the book glowed eerily, for the first time in ten years the cards were reacting to his presence. He felt guiltily about shutting them away for so long, and he missed their company despite the fact they were a bit like Hei-ying; they could never hold a real argument with him, but still they had their own tempers.  
  
He pulled the book off the shelf, and carried it over to the desk. He put it down as he fumbled with the drawer and pulled out his key. He moved over to the window seat, the moonlight streamed in and on to Clow. He sighed as he turned the book over, he knew the instant the cards were free again that they would give him hell for—  
  
Clow's mouth fell open as he stared at the front of the book; there on the cover was the lion. It was a picture, and slightly fierce looking, but still it was the guardian beast with the golden eyes. Clow blinked and the image was gone. The lion was supposed to guard the book, "No. . ." Clow muttered aloud as he stared at the key in his hand and then the lock on the book, "He's supposed to guard the seal. The seal on the book . . . Keroberos, guardian beast of the seal!" He jumped up excitedly, "Of course the Cardcaptor . . . she's going to break the seal on the book! Therefore I have to create Keroberos in order to make sure that she will be the one that opens my book!"  
  
Clow wasn't exactly sure what the strange noises were, they had sounded like bizarre snores, but he was sure they were supposed to draw him closer to the book. Clow stood and put the book down, he had made his decision.  
  
It was time to create Keroberos.  
  
  
  
Clow groaned as he rolled onto his side, "How long have I been asleep?" He murmured as he struggled to get up. His fingers slipped over his key, and he managed to sit upright. "I'm certainly out of practice!" he chuckled; as he realised he'd been out for half an hour. He looked around; the book still lay on the window seat. He raised his hand and made the sealed book come to him. He put the key in the lock and felt it eagerly turn, the book flew open and the cards lay silently in the book. Clow smiled, "I take the hint . . ." he murmured, "I apologise for sealing you in here for so long . . . now wake up . . ." he looked at the tiny cocoon of white feathered wings that lay in the centre of his study, "I have someone to show you . . ."  
  
  
  
Hei-ying awoke.  
  
Something had changed. There had been a massive shift in the mansion. He reached out with his senses, he could feel Clow and, it had been nearly a decade, but he could now feel the cards again. But now . . . //There's something new in the house . . . // he sat up and slid out of bed, he silently slipped on his robes; the ceremonial robes Clow had created for him. Hei-ying wore them all the time, and, because Clow had placed them under the same spell that he placed much of the carpets and his own clothes; the robes never needed washing or changing, any rips or tears were instantly repaired. The main reason Hei-ying actually wore them was because the first time he had put them on, Clow had broken a seven day silence and muttered quietly "Very handsome."  
  
Hei-ying smoothed the soft black material, and checked his hair before leaving his room. Hei-ying was very conscious of the way he appeared to the Master. Never a hair out of place, never a single wrinkle in his clothes, he didn't want Clow to think he wasn't perfect. The only time Hei-ying allowed Clow to see him in any state of undress was when Clow desired it. Before he went to sleep, he would plait his hair compulsively, ensuring that his hair would be perfect if the Master stepped in that night, he never complained, never argued back. He just couldn't take the risk of Clow fulfilling Hilligans' prophecy, so he acted perfectly, like the perfect creation he had been fashioned to be. This produced some vaguely disturbing traits in Hei-ying, but Clow had been so deep in his depression, he assumed Hei-ying was just coping with his grief over Hilligans in a different manner.  
  
Hei-ying glided down the corridor, his feet floating swiftly and quietly over the floor. It had been over the last five years that Hei-ying's compulsive need to look perfect had spread to a dislike of walking. Hei- ying thought that the floors, never mind that Clow had created a cleaning spell to keep them clean, Hei-ying thought the floors were filthy, and that if he touched them that this contamination would spread to him and then he would lose his perfect appearance. Outside of his own room, Clow's study and, on the rare occasions he had been permitted, Clow's bedroom, Hei-ying never touched the ground. As he past Clow's bedroom, he heard his Master's voice sound in his mind, "Hei-ying? Are you awake?"  
  
Hei-ying frowned slightly; Clow should have sense that Hei-ying was actually just outside his door. "Yes, Master Clow." Hei-ying noticed that Clow seemed distracted; perhaps that was why he wasn't sure of Hei-ying location.  
  
"Good, I want you to come here please . . ." Clow sounded very excited; "I have something wonderful to show you."  
  
Hei-ying pushed against the door, wondering what had caused the sudden shift in, not only the magical plane of the mansion, but in Clow's mood as well.  
  
  
  
Within a day, the tiny kitten had stopped sleeping, and his wings unfurled. He peered with bright gold eyes at the new world. Within a week, he had learned how to walk unsteadily on his four tiny legs, and how to flutter for a few feet using his large white wings, he would follow Clow everywhere he could. He hadn't yet learnt how to get up the stairs, so Clow quite happily carried the tiny kitten up. Within a month, Hei-ying discovered he had a new dislike.  
  
Keroberos.  
  
A few weeks after Keroberos had been created, Clow began teaching Hei-ying again, instructing him once more in the way of the cards. He did this with more surety than he had before, Clow knew now what was the purpose of Keroberos and was figuring out the purpose Hei-ying could play in the destiny the Clow cards. Clow had decided that Keroberos would be the appointer; he would choose the Cardcaptor. And Hei-ying would help her; giving her the guidance she needed to catch the cards quickly. However Clow was stuck about how his creations would know that the Cardcaptor was the right one, maybe he needed to set her some sort of challenge, maybe a judgement of some kind to check if she was capable of being Master over the cards. . .  
  
"Hmmmm . . ." Hei-ying hovered patiently in the centre of Clow's study, he watched as Clow paced in front of him.  
  
"HMMMM!!" Hei-ying glared as Keroberos mimicked Clow, prancing on every spot Clow's feet had just left. It was becoming increasingly clear that the tiny lion's magical senses were starting to flourish. He could evidently see the magic traces that Clow's footsteps left. No doubt it would be soon that the tiny thing would start to speak, Hei-ying rolled his eyes, he also didn't have any doubt that this new ability would get very much on Hei- ying's nerves as well.  
  
It was the middle of summer, and Clow was trying to figure out how the Cardcaptor was supposed to work, how she was going to be selected, what she would do with the cards once she had captured them, he knew that Keroberos was going to guard the seal. Hei-ying was going to be the Cardcaptor's adviser, since he had been with the cards for the longest time, Clow was going to teach him everything about the cards so he would be able to tell the Cardcaptor how best to capture the cards.  
  
Clow glanced briefly behind him; Keroberos was still leaping into each spot where Clow's foot had been. He smiled and changed direction. The lion followed, as Clow stepped to the left suddenly, then to the right. Hei-ying wasn't impressed and rolled his eyes when the lion giggled as Clow started to hop on one foot.  
  
"Cease your commotion!" Hei-ying snapped at the lion, "You're disturbing the Master!"  
  
The lion skidded to a halt, and sat instantly. He had leaned that his Oniichan didn't like it when he had fun, and that it was often better if he just sat quietly. Clow turned and picked up Keroberos, he cradled the lion in his arms as he looked at Hei-ying, "It's only a little laugh Hei-ying . . . I don't mind a little laugh . . ."  
  
When Hei-ying's only response was to glare even harder at the lion, Clow sighed, "Hei-ying, I would like you to go practice your levitation."  
  
Hei-ying's eyes widened slightly and he looked down at his feet, Clow explained, "You can usually float much lower than that . . . I would like you to practice that."  
  
Hei-ying bowed graciously and left to train in his own room. Clow stroked Keroberos' neck, "Now . . . where were we?"  
  
The lion looked at him and put on a very thoughtfully face, "HMMMM!" He hummed, and then giggled. Clow chuckled slightly. "Of course . . ."  
  
They hopped and skipped around the study all afternoon, and the lion never missed a single step. Clow even put a blindfold around the lion's eyes and instructed him to follow him. Keroberos was very good, but still being very young, became very drained very quickly. Clow picked him up as the sun reached the horizon, it's deep red light spilling in though the wide windows. He walked over to the window seat, the yawning lion cradled gently in his arms.  
  
They sat together for another hour, the tiny lion sleeping, Clow just watching the late summer sun slip out of the sky. Clow sighed happily, the lion had brought a little life back to the house, and Clow didn't know what he could give him in return. He scratched the lion's head absently and stared out the window, something was strange about the sight. He frowned as he tried to figure out what was wrong with the landscape.  
  
A single small cherry blossom floated down in front of him. With one hand still supporting Keroberos from underneath, he raise his other hand to catch the delicate petal. He blinked in surprise when he opened his hand and the flower was gone, "A vision . . ." he murmured as he looked at his empty hand, his eyes suddenly focused on the glass of the window. That was it, that was what was wrong . . . the reflection in the window . . . it wasn't . . . the right one.  
  
It still held Clow in it, but he was much older, he was taller, and wearing his magic robes again. The older Clow adjusted his spectacles, as he stared back at Clow. He couldn't see his younger, it was if this older Clow was staring out of the study's window, and Clow was the reflection. He looked at the older Clow's chest; Keroberos was there again. But this time it was an older Keroberos, not the tiny kitten that Clow could hold to his chest with a single hand, a larger lion. However, Clow noticed this older Keroberos wasn't as old as the Cardcaptor's Keroberos, //He must be Keroberos many years from now but in my lifetime . . .// Clow thought as he followed the lion's long tail. It was wrapping itself around someone's hand. The hand shook Keroberos off and turned the page of a book.  
  
Clow gasped, the angel was sitting on the other side of the window seat; one of his bare feet was rubbing up and down against the older Clow's. The angel didn't seem aware that he was doing it, and Keroberos was dozing, heavy head lying on Clow's chest. The older Clow smiled slightly as he looked at the angel happily. Clow sat up and placed Keroberos on the bench gently so not to wake him. He moved to the other side to look closer at the angel. He was still denied the knowledge whether this was Hei-ying or not, but he felt a rush of need and love. He also felt a little silly as he raised his hand to knock lightly on the glass; it wasn't like the angel would be able to hear him.  
  
He tapped lightly on the glass twice, and was surprised when the angel's eyes slipped off the book; a small frown creased his perfect brow. His curious gaze looked first at the dozing Keroberos, then at the older Clow who had resumed his gazing out of the window. As a last check, the perfect angel turned to look out the window. Clow began to curse as he felt the vision slip away from him, the last thing he saw was the angel's perfect eyes widen with surprise. "I love you!" Clow mouthed clearly, hoping the angel had seen him.  
  
  
  
He twitched his nose; something was brushing it roughly. There was a concerned growl, and then the brushing continued. Clow realised that the brushing wasn't brushing it was licking. He groaned lightly, and opened his eyes. His eyes widened with surprise as Keroberos' face filled his vision. His tiny fuzzy features were creased in a deep frown, as his concerned gold eyes searched Clow's face. The tiny lion seemed to be on the verge of tears. "Oh, no. . ." Clow murmured, as he brought his hands up to soothe the small lion, "It's okay, I just had a small vision that's all . . ."  
  
The lion trembled into Clow's chest, as Clow sat up. He cooed and murmured quietly as he calmed the lion down. "I'm sorry . . . that must have been very worrying for you . . ."  
  
He looked up, the cards were orbiting them, "I'm all right," he assured them, "I just saw something . . ."  
  
Keroberos pushed himself up to look into Clow's eyes, and then the lion looked up at the cards, he gazed at them amazed. Clow watched Keroberos' expression closely; the lion had proven that he could sense the after- resonance of magic, but it was quite another feat to accurately sense pure magic. "Do you realise what they are, Keroberos?"  
  
Keroberos still stared at the cards, but he nodded. "Tell me what they are . . ." Clow murmured.  
  
"Card. . ." He raised a paw to touch the nearest card; the Earthy graciously lowered herself to allow the curious kitten to make contact with her. He pawed her smooth surface lightly, he jerked back with surprise when she began to glow for him. He glanced at Clow worriedly, to check if Clow approved of what she was doing. When Clow nodded, Keroberos pawed her again, her glowing intensified. She hovered over him and dusted him with some glowing magic. Clow laughed as the lion shook it off. He plucked the card out of the air, and then stood. Keroberos remained on the floor still shaking the sparkling dust off. He growled slightly as the last few flecks refused to leave his tail.  
  
Clow settled back into the window seat, he watched Keroberos fondly. The lion was still a child, happy, playful, and full of life. //just what I need . . .// Clow smiled at the lion as he realised Clow was waiting for him. The golden kitten pranced over, and scrambled up the seat. Clow folded his legs under him, and held the card in front of the lion. Keroberos sat opposite Clow, and stared very seriously at the card. He pressed his paw against the golden banner.  
  
Clow smiled, "This is the Earthy, and she is the last card I created. Do you understand? This . . ." he ran his finger over the gold banner, ". . . Is her name, her name is The Earthy. Hmmmm. . .? Do you understand?"  
  
The lion nodded solemnly, he glanced up from the card and paused. He drew a deep breath and opened his mouth, "My name . . .?"  
  
Clow's eyes crinkled with warmth, he petted Keroberos before answering. "Your name is Keroberos. Keh-row-bear-ros. Keroberos."  
  
"Kaah-rooe-bear-rus."  
  
Clow shook his head slightly, "No. . . Kehh. . ." he motioned the lion to repeat it.  
  
"Kehh. . ." the lion nodded.  
  
Clow smiled then over pronounced the next part, "Rrrow. . ."  
  
"Rrow. . ."  
  
"Bear. . ."  
  
"Bear. . ."  
  
Clow smiled as his finished, "Ross."  
  
"Ross." The lion grinned. "Keroberos!" He leapt to his feet and took several different poses, repeating his name over and over. Clow laughed, and let the Earthy rejoin the pack.  
  
"Who is. . . ?" Keroberos looked to the door, and Clow took this to mean that the small lion wanted to know who Hei-ying was.  
  
"You know that he is your Oniichan, your eldest brother . . .?" Clow checked, when Keroberos nodded, he continued, "His name is Hei-ying Reed."  
  
"Hei-ying Reed?"  
  
"Hei-ying Reed, just as you are Keroberos Reed." Keroberos bit his bottom lip, Clow smiled kindly again. "Go on . . . if you never ask questions then you will never learn . . ."  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
"My name is Clow Reed. I created you. I created Hei-ying. And I created these cards."  
  
Keroberos pressed his nose and forepaws against the glass. "Did you make the outside?"  
  
Clow blushed, "No, I didn't . . . no, only you, Hei-ying and the cards."  
  
Keroberos smiled, and then crawled into Clow's arms again, he yawned. "Must I call you Master?"  
  
While Keroberos was leaning all about his new life, Hei-ying had entered the room silently; he stood in the doorway just observing the Master and his new younger brother.  
  
Sensing that the Master would probably like to teach the younger brother without the distraction of Hei-ying, he back slowly out of the room and turned to return to his room. He paused to listen to Clow's reply to the impertinent lion's request. "No, Keroberos, you don't have to . . . like Hei-ying, I give you permission to use my name. . ."  
  
  
  
"Good." Clow put the card back into the pack, and picked out another. He laid it in front of Hei-ying. "Now, the Mirror?"  
  
"You must say it's name. Once it's name is spoken, it will return to it's card form." Hei-ying smiled so far he hadn't gotten a single one wrong.  
  
"Good. Good. Now, the Woody."  
  
Hei-ying laughed, "That's a trick question, Master. You don't need to do anything to turn it back to it's card form. It will do it by itself."  
  
Clow chuckled, "Very good. You have been paying attention."  
  
"Oh, I listen to every word you say, Master." Clow blushed slightly. Hei- ying was doing it again. He was flirting with him, even though they had stopped sleeping together about three months after Keroberos had been created. The small lion wouldn't leave Clow's side for five minutes let alone the time they need to have a good time. In some ways though, Clow felt happier about distancing himself from Hei-ying. His first creation seemed to get very jealous when Clow was out, and while he didn't dare interrogate his Master, he seemed overtly concerned with Clow's dealings when Clow left the mansion. Now, Clow felt Hei-ying understood that their physical relationship was over and was going to remain this way for the time being, but there were times Hei-ying would try and entice Clow back.  
  
Clow coughed and pulled another card from the pack. "Firey?"  
  
Hei-ying smiled, he knew this one too. He was about to answer when . . .  
  
"CLOW?" Keroberos bolted past the door, and then tried to stop. He slid along the floor slightly; then turned and scrambled back into the room. "CLOW!!!"  
  
Clow laughed, the lion had grown a lot in the last three months, and was now lean and slightly lanky in his appearance. "Yes, Keroberos?"  
  
The lion grabbed Clow's robes in his teeth and tried to drag the magician along with him out of the room. "Come look! Look!" He cried excitedly.  
  
Hei-ying stood and snapped, "Keroberos! We are in a lesson! Show more respect to the Master!"  
  
The two brothers glared at each other for a bit, both were a bit headstrong when it came to getting Clow's attention, and therefore rarely backed down. Hei-ying didn't seem to like his new brother. Clow sighed, "Hei-ying, we can continue the lesson later, I have a feeling what Keroberos has to show me is a bit urgent."  
  
"Not only that but it's very important too!" Cried Keroberos as well. He pranced out the room, and called out "Follow me! Come look! Look!"  
  
Hei-ying stared at Clow as he shrugged and followed the brash little lion. He sank slowly into his seat in shock. Clow had chosen the brutish lion above him. Him. Hei-ying, his first creation, his first lover. He felt a tiny pang of the same emotion that had made him stand up and yell at Keroberos. He stood and looked out the window, Clow was laughing, as the lion brought leaf after leaf to him, each leaf was yellow from the affects of autumn. Hei-ying briefly wondered why the lion was so amazed by the leaves that fell from the trees, when it occurred to him. This was Keroberos' first autumn. As Clow crouched down by the lion, Hei-ying knew he was explaining the phenomenon to his younger brother, Hei-ying found himself thinking a silly thought. //Perhaps . . .// he moved closer to the window of his classroom, and pressed a pale hand against the clear glass, he spoke his thoughts aloud to himself.  
  
" . . . I should make this last autumn the last Keroberos sees . . ."  
  
  
  
Clow paused in his explanation, and looked up to the classroom window. Hei- ying stared at them briefly before his pale figure shrank back into the shadows.  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Hei-ying: Hmmm . . . how shall I do it? How? How? How?  
  
Kero: Keep away from me, you psychotic homicidal maniac!  
  
Clow: Kero . . . that was surprisingly well worded of you . . .  
  
Kero: Yeah, I know . . . ol' DrM's been havin' a little too much fun with the synonyms option today!  
  
DrM: I can't help it! My writer's block on 'Whimpy Scaredy Cat' just exploded!! I finally think I cracked it!  
  
Hei-ying: [brightly] Kero's skull?  
  
DrM: [points at evil dude] You. Are. *Sick*.  
  
Hei-ying: Yeah, I know . . . [reads fic] And I'm surprisingly inconsistent!  
  
DrM: Shush! You're insane, insane people don't think straight . . . they think left.  
  
Hei-ying: [dead pan] Oh, now who doesn't make any sense?!  
  
Clow: [whispering] I think we should make a run for it . . .  
  
Kero: [whispering] I agree . . . but before we run away screaming, I think we should ask the readers to R&R. . .  
  
Clow: [whispering] Good point! [Whispers to readers] Please R&R!!! 


	11. Water Demon

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Ten: Water Demon  
  
  
  
"Here they are!"  
  
Clow took his magic robes out and gave them a good shake. He spluttered slightly as the dust floated in the air. "Certainly has been a while."  
  
He smiled down at Keroberos as the lion sniffed the clothes. A look of disgust crossed his face; "You're not going to wear that, are you?"  
  
"Mmm-hmm!" Clow nodded. "It's my favourite robes . . . the last time I wore them was . . ."  
  
"Was when?" Keroberos asked, unaware of the sad look that passed over Clow's face.  
  
"Was when Mister Hilligans. . . passed away." Clow sat in the window seat, cradling the black robes in his lap, they still had the mud stains from when Clow threw them over Hilligans' body in a failed effort to keep him warm. Keroberos sensed Clow's mood now, and leapt onto the bench next to his still young Master, "Whoever this Mister Hilligans bloke was, I'm sure he wouldn't want you moping over him for the rest of eternity . . . C'mon!" He nudged the window open; "Let's go for a fly!  
  
Clow looked out the window, "I haven't flown in years. . . I can't remember. . ."  
  
"Pish-posh!" Keroberos snorted, "C'mon, it'll do you some good!"  
  
Clow was about to decline again when Hei-ying knocked at the door, "Come in, Hei-ying!" Clow called out happily, the black robed angel glided silently in. Once the door had been shut, he allowed himself to land on the ground. Clow sighed he was beginning to wish he hadn't made such gloomy robes for Hei-ying, it suited him, but they always struck Clow as funeral clothes. He sighed and stared out the window. Keroberos jumped off the seat and pranced over to his eldest brother, "Don't you think Oniichan? Clow and us should go for a good old-fashioned fly together, ni? Ni?"  
  
He tugged slightly at Hei-ying's coat tails before Hei-ying snapped quietly, "Let go of my robes!"  
  
Clow looked at him, "Keroberos is right . . . we all need to stretch our wings . . ."  
  
Hei-ying was so flustered about Keroberos' drool on his coat that he spoke suddenly without thinking, "But Master. . ." he protested, "Our training!"  
  
Clow blinked in surprise, Hei-ying had protested against Clow's suggestion . . . perhaps there was hope for him yet! Clow smiled, "There is time for training later . . . the autumn is still warm; I suggest we take up this advantage while we still can."  
  
Hei-ying frowned slightly but bowed graciously before extending his wings.  
  
  
  
Keroberos soared, the wind in his face, and the slight cold taste to the air made him smile. He was now just over three months old; he had gained the appearance of a fully-grown lion. Although this did mean Clow Reed didn't have to carry him up the stairs anymore, Keroberos did lament the fact he couldn't sleep in Clow's arms anymore. Keroberos looked behind him, Clow was sitting somewhat unsteadily on his staff, he smiled up at Keroberos. "See? I told you I was slightly out of practice!"  
  
Keroberos growled playfully and dived towards him, "Then I will have to train you for once!"  
  
Clow tried to dodge out the way as Keroberos dived at him over and over; Hei-ying remained away from the ruckus, casually observing Clow's movements. The magician was still handsome, and he had matured rather well, his black hair was still long and well kept but since Keroberos' creation, Clow had allowed some strands of hair to hang loose around his face. Clow had taken to keeping his reading spectacles on all the time, but to Hei- ying this just further increased his new matured look. Hei-ying still craved Clow, and Keroberos had brought chaos to their orderly routine. Before Clow wouldn't speak, much less laugh, but at least he still came to Hei-ying when sleep eluded him. Now, Clow rarely spent any time away from Keroberos, the lion had commanded his attention the whole time that he was growing, but the time was nearing when Keroberos would be able to support himself and would become independent. It was that moment when Hei-ying planned on returning to Clow and performing his regular duty.  
  
The was a sharp shout as Keroberos dived too close to Clow, Hei-ying broke out of his self analysis and watched as Clow spun on the staff. Keroberos laughed heartily as Clow attempted to right himself. Hei-ying's eyes widened with fear as Clow lost his grip on the magical staff.  
  
  
  
The wind was whistling passed his ears at a frightening pace, he had closed his eyes and wondered if this was the time fate had chosen for him to die . . . it seemed a little unfair, and he didn't want to leave his creations behind like this. Clow wondered about the feeling because he didn't feel like his work was done. Hei-ying wasn't fully trained, he only knew half of the cards, and Keroberos was still unable to control the strength of his fireballs. The whistling in his hears started to change, warping slightly as Clow entered yet another vision. He opened his eyes; he was on his gilded staff, racing downwards. It was the middle of a snowstorm, and he was diving downwards. He was chasing something, he realised, but it was just out of his reach. There was nothing in his power he could do to stop the descent. His heart wrenched as he realised he was lose this precious gift forever . . .  
  
"Master . . .?" Hei-ying's voice, Clow frowned and opened his eyes; Hei- ying stared back at him, jade green eyes displaying an unusual amount of emotion. He was holding Clow, his arms wrapped securely around Clow's waist. "Are you all right?"  
  
Clow lifted his arms to wrap them around Hei-ying neck, as the black-haired angel ascended upwards, Clow smiled slightly, "I am now . . . It's a good thing you're so fast. . ." he stared down, glad that this was not the end for him.  
  
Hei-ying also smiled slightly, the Master was happy to be in his arms again. Although this wasn't their old arrangement, Hei-ying tightened his arms on Clow's waist. He pulled his Master closer, into a small embrace. Clow rested his chin on Hei-ying's shoulder; it wasn't often that the angel display simple affection, often every movement he made was usually tinted with some sexual suggestion, although whether Hei-ying was aware of this Clow didn't know.  
  
Hei-ying smiled as he breathed in the scent of Clow's hair, it had changed little since the last time they had been together. He bit his lip as Clow's magical essence began to seep into his senses. It was starting to overwhelm him, they had been apart for so long, and Hei-ying wanted Clow so much. He craved Clow, with every breath he took, he wanted his Master. In the few months of Keroberos' creation, Clow had ceased his nightly visitations completely, Hei-ying stayed up every night waiting for a Master he was addicted to. For the second time that day Hei-ying did something that went against his very being, he turned his head slightly and brushed his lips against Clow's smooth pale cheek.  
  
Clow froze as Hei-ying pressed cool lips against his cheek. His eyes slid shut as a small ember of desire threatened to relight. It had been so long . . .  
  
"Hei-ying . . ." he moaned slightly.  
  
His black haired creation pulled back slight to look him in the eye, Clow moved one hand up to the back of Hei-ying's head, twining his fingers in the noir coloured hair. Hei-ying felt the familiar push of Clow's hand behind his head; his eyes slid shut as his lips parted slightly. //Back to their old ways . . .// Hei-ying's staved body cried jubilantly.  
  
"CLOW!" Keroberos' concerned yell broke through the trance Hei-ying's kiss had put on Clow. Clow gasped slightly and pulled back his head. Clamping his hands securely on Hei-ying's shoulder, Clow looked up. Keroberos dived down towards them, his long tail wrapped firmly around the gilded staff. "Gomen!! Are you all right?!"  
  
Before Clow could answer, Hei-ying snapped at him, "Of course he's all right, you ridiculous overgrown house cat!!" Clow stared at Hei-ying with amazement as the black haired angel started to shake with barely contained fury, "You almost killed him. You brainless little--"  
  
Keroberos glared at him, "I wasn't asking you, Baka!"  
  
As their argument grew louder, Clow climbed back on to his winged staff, he stared in amazement as the two creations hurled abuse at each other. It was the first time he had seen them quarrelling, but from the ferocity, he could easily tell that it wasn't the first time that they had argued. They already knew each other's response, and launched increasingly vile language at each other.  
  
Hei-ying growled menacingly as Keroberos butted him in the stomach. He threw one arm behind him, and a deep green glow started to appear in his palm. Clow's eyes widened as one of Hei-ying's jaded daggers formed. "Enough!" Clow roared, he put himself between his two creations; he faced Hei-ying and glared up at the furious black haired angel.  
  
For a few moments, Clow thought that Hei-ying was going to throw the dagger straight at him regardless. There was something in his eyes, which Clow didn't recognise, pain, and fury, hate. Clow didn't understand, he never created Hei-ying to have those emotions; he thought he had created Hei-ying to be perfect. Hei-ying's eyes calmed instantly, and the thing was gone.  
  
Hei-ying turned away and threw his dagger in a different direction; it ploughed straight into the pond near the work shed. He folded his arms and turned back to Clow, who blinked. For the first time in his life, Clow couldn't read Hei-ying's expression, there was still some residual anger, and maybe a tiny bit of disappointment at not being able to fight Keroberos or some sexual deprivation Clow didn't know, but there were other things as well, an instability that surfaced briefly.  
  
Clow turned away, and faced Keroberos, the younger creation's eyes narrowed as they focused on Hei-ying, the lion's lip curled with unspent vehemence. Clow positioned himself so he could turn his head easily and address the two. "What has come over you? Both of you?" Clow fumed, "You will be spending the rest of your lives together! Don't you understand? You must get along, you must be a team . . . or you'll fail the Cardcaptor . . . and me."  
  
This last statement made shame colour Hei-ying's cheeks and Keroberos looked down. Clow sighed and shook his head; "Very well, I strongly suggest you spend the rest of the day in contemplation. Consider the words I have spoken."  
  
Clow turned his staff and headed back to his study. He paused briefly to check if their fighting had resumed, but instead was saddened to see the two eye each other coldly before turning away. He didn't realise it had been so bad, their sibling rivalry had turned into something much more dangerous. He shook his head again; Hei-ying's hate filled eyes still haunted him.  
  
  
  
Hei-ying flew down to the pond, the scene of his last act. He stared at the water coolly; first the old man had tried to come between Clow and him, now Keroberos had tried to kill the Master. Some rational part of Hei-ying mind suggested that his brother had merely made a mistake and had flown too close to Clow, but it still made Hei-ying angry. Keroberos took far too many liberties with Clow, was far too disrespectful. The lion never put Master before he spoke Master Clow's name. Hei-ying frowned; no one was allowed to talk to the Master like that. Hilligans' had learned that lesson . . . Hei-ying's lips curled as a delicious thought spread over his mind, //perhaps it's time Keroberos learnt as well . . .//  
  
  
  
Keroberos looped and soared in the sky for a few more minutes before he landed heavily, //Baka Hei-ying! He's ruining my mood!// Keroberos couldn't enjoy his flight now that Clow was angry at him, Clow had never been angry at him before like that. He sighed as he strolled across the lush grass of the lawn, it was going to be tough, and he'd never done it before but . . . Keroberos gritted his teeth as Hei-ying came into sight. His elder brother was staring into the pond, arms folded and levitating in that creepy fashion he always insisted upon. Keroberos sighed, "Hei-ying?"  
  
Hei-ying slowly turned his head to glare at Keroberos. Any lesser lion would have been intimidated, but Keroberos had lived with Hei-ying for the entirety of his life. He was used to Hei-ying's temper. He never showed it to Clow, but to Keroberos, Hei-ying was a hot-tempered, often cruel brother. Keroberos was no stranger to the jade daggers Hei-ying would throw at him.  
  
"We need to talk . . ." he took Hei-ying's silence as permission to continue, "It's about Clow."  
  
"Master Clow!" This always provoked a response. Hei-ying walked around the pond, as Keroberos approached him. "What about the Master?"  
  
"Hei-ying, we must start to get along . . . I am willing to put it behind us, okay?" Keroberos thought he was being entirely reasonable. Hei-ying appeared to think about it.  
  
"You want to ensure that Master Clow isn't displeased . . ." Hei-ying moved towards the water.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Hmmmm . . ." Hei-ying stared thoughtfully at the water. He raised his foot and hung it over the water. Keroberos stared in amazement as small ripples started to appear under his brother's foot. The ripples glowed green, jade like Hei-ying's magic, jade like his thorn daggers, jade like his eyes. The shimmering emerald water circles entranced Keroberos; he had a particular weakness for sparkling lights. Clow used to let the glow entertain the young lion when Clow himself was too tired to play with the active kitten. Hei-ying smiled predatorily as he watched Keroberos draw closer to the water. His younger brother gasped as Hei-ying stepped on to the water.  
  
"H-how are you doing that?"  
  
"It's called Levitation . . . it's one of the powers Master Clow gave us . . ."  
  
"He's never trained me how to use it . . ." Keroberos cocked his head in an attempt to see how his elder brother was doing it.  
  
"I expect he thinks you know how to do it by now . . ." Hei-ying wasn't exactly telling the truth, it was true that Clow had given them the power, but it required an immense amount of concentration, and training was required.  
  
"Can I do it?" Keroberos was distracted, Hei-ying smiled, and moved towards the middle of the deep pond. "You should . . ." he held his hand out to his brother, "just walk onto the water . . ."  
  
"Are you . . .?"  
  
"Yes . . ." Hei-ying bobbed slightly increasing the number of ripples below him, knowing that this would entice his brother further.  
  
Keroberos lifted a paw and held it just over the water as Hei-ying had with his foot, there were glowing gold ripples under his foot. He raised his head to look questioningly at Hei-ying.  
  
His elder brother smiled again, "Try not to think about it . . . it'll just happen . . ."  
  
  
  
Clow sat on his staff outside his study's open window. He was thinking, what had he done wrong that would make them fight like this? He had created Keroberos to draw power from the sun, Hei-ying from the stars, the two didn't cancel each other out, so what provoked them to behave like that? Hei-ying's power source was the stars because Clow had guess that this would be helpful to the Cardcaptor. He sensed that she was affiliated with the stars somehow, so if Hei-ying gained power from the stars, he would immediately attract the Cardcaptor. As for Keroberos, the intention was that the sun's power would give him an endearing quality, one that would make him liked, trusted and respected. Clow had decided against using the moon, he felt it would be too cold and distant for the Cardcaptor, that any being created under that sign might even scare her without even meaning to.  
  
He sighed, he shouldn't have yelled like that at Keroberos. Hei-ying was probably used to it, there had been more than a few occasions in the time after Hilligans' death when Clow had become incoherently drunk and hurled abuse at Hei-ying for no other reason other than Hei-ying was the nearest target. Clow always regretted that Hei-ying had ever seen that half of him and resolved never to show it again, not to Hei-ying, not to any of his creations. Clow rocked on his staff slightly as he thought about how he could make the two understand each other better. Maybe getting them to talk would be a good idea, he smiled that would be a start, he reached out with his senses to find out where the two were. Hei-ying's jade aura and Keroberos' golden aura shone brightly from the direction of the pond by the work shed. He kicked off in the air, and sped smoothly towards them.  
  
  
  
Keroberos thought he could see something moving under the water, as he stepped tentatively on to the water, the golden ripples moved easily from under him. His smile was uncertain briefly as he dipped but stabilised, he looked up at his elder brother. "Hey. . . this is fun. . ."  
  
"Indeed." Hei-ying stared at him, Keroberos suddenly felt rather strange. . . as if he had entered into some kind of fog, he felt like he couldn't see. "Hey! What's happening . . .?"  
  
"What *do* you mean?" Hei-ying's voice was muffled slightly. Keroberos frowned, he couldn't concentrate on the levitation and try to sense the magical world at the same time. . . he tried to land, unaware that he was dipping closer to the water. He was so sure he could see something moving under the water. . .  
  
Hei-ying floated slightly backwards as his younger brother slowly sank down into the murky water, it was a bit tiring. Blocking Keroberos' magic and pulling the vines up from the waterbed was a little bit of a strain on Hei- ying. It had been easy with the old man, since Hilligans had mediocre magic; but Keroberos was on a par with his own. It was quite a task, confusing the lion and waiting until he was low enough in the water to spring the murderous vines on him.  
  
In his mind Hei-ying was already compiling his explanation to Master Clow, //I tried to convince him not to follow me onto the water . . .no . . . *Better* . . . It's all my fault Master, I just wanted to apologise to him, and I had crossed the water without thinking that Keroberos would follow me . . . I didn't realise anything was wrong until he just stopped moving . . .// Hei-ying smiled as he wondered how long it would take for Clow's grief to wear off this time.  
  
Keroberos was partly aware that something was slipping around his ankles as they made contact with the cool water. It tugged gently, and he allowed it to pull him down, thinking that it would lead him out of this mental fog that had engulfed him. He jerked awake when bitter rank water slipped into his mouth, he still couldn't see properly but it registered to him that if he went any further under the water, he would most certainly drown.  
  
Hei-ying jerked back in surprise when his younger brother's wings suddenly extended and Keroberos began to fight the waterweeds that were wrapped around his ankle. He was about to force them to pull him under completely, intending to submerge the lion completely when Clow's deep violet aura brushed against his sense. Cursing, Hei-ying threw himself into the water and dragged Keroberos out of the dirty water. The lion was so exhausted from thrashing about in the water that he had passed out. Hei-ying on the other hand, wondered if he could salvage his excuse, //If only I had had just a few more minutes . . .// he thought with disgust, as he watch the lion continue to breathe heavily.  
  
  
  
"MASTER!" Hei-ying's voice called out to him, Clow stopped briefly. Hei- ying sounded scared or panicked.  
  
Hei-ying?! Clow cried back and resumed his flight towards the pond. He gasped in shock as he saw Hei-ying barely standing by his brother and Keroberos unconscious or dead. Clow's heart felt a spike of fear, //Keroberos . . .?// he landed swiftly and ran the short distance to them.  
  
"What happened?!" Clow cried as he fell to his knees by Keroberos, the lion was still breathing. For this Clow was glad, almost giddy with relief, he listened with only a half ear as Hei-ying launched into his explanation.  
  
"It's all my fault Master, I just wanted to apologise to him, and I had crossed the water without thinking that Keroberos would follow me . . . I didn't realise anything was wrong until . . ."  
  
  
  
Once Keroberos was safely tucked into bed, Clow took Hei-ying to the pond. He stared at the seemingly calm water, "Hei-ying . . . What happened?"  
  
"I'm not entirely sure Master, Keroberos just followed me onto the water . . ." Hei-ying knelt by the water and peered in, "I don't understand, what was in the water that could have dragged him down?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Just before I realised something was wrong . . . I thought I saw something moving in the water."  
  
Clow leant over the water, and a cold chill ran over his spine. As he stared into the water, the kind looking man looked back. Again for him it was still night. Clow smiled before the image faded. But still the cold feeling remained; "Perhaps there is a mischievous sprite in the water . . .?"  
  
Clow sat back and stared at Hei-ying thoughtfully, his suggestion would be quite accurate. "If there was a water demon in the pond, then it *would* try to drown people . . ." Clow frowned it had succeed in one try, and it had tried again with Keroberos. He wondered why it hadn't tried to get Hei- ying, Hei-ying seemed to understand his thoughts and stared at the water.  
  
"Perhaps . . ." he suggested, "Perhaps because I am much more powerful than mister Hilligans, and Keroberos has yet to attain his full potential . . . that is why it has never attempted to get me . . ."  
  
Clow nodded, he was furious, his closest friend had been claimed by some *petty* water sprite! He stood and called forth his staff.  
  
Hei-ying stood as well, he spread his wings and floated a few feet off the ground as the supernatural storm surrounded his Master. "What are you going to do, Master Clow?" He called above the wind.  
  
"Watery!" Clow called out, "Help me remove the evil that threatens Keroberos! Gather all the water from the pond and remove it. . . then go to all the other ponds, and repeat the process! Release!"  
  
The water spirit rose from the card and paused, she snarled at Hei-ying. His jade eyes narrowed slightly, he was well aware Clow's order had called the spirit to take away the threat to Keroberos, but the Watery was confuse if she was supposed to kill Hei-ying. "Watery!" Clow called, "I said the pond! Hei-ying, back away slightly, your aura might be confusing her."  
  
As Clow destroyed every pond in his mansion's grounds, Hei-ying returned to his brother's room. Hei-ying wondered why Master Clow had ordered the spirit off him, he was the threat to Keroberos . . . perhaps Master Clow had realised this too but had called her off because he . . .// He approves of what I do! // Hei-ying smiled, //Perhaps he wishes me to dispose of Keroberos, but doesn't want me to make it so blatantly obvious . . .//He knocked lightly on the lion's door. When there was no answer he pushed the door open. Keroberos was still sleeping, safely wrapped up, his room was a bright sunshine yellow, and where the dark panels of wood stopped there was a warm yellow paint.  
  
Hei-ying glared at the bright yellow curtains Master Clow had made for Keroberos, they were just like Keroberos, they had little suns and sunflowers embroidered on them. Master Clow had handmade them, and he and Keroberos had spent an enthusiastic afternoon decorating the room with a combination of magic and hard work. Hei-ying had declined to assist, much to Master Clow's disappointment. Hei-ying had taken one look at the paint splattered, grinning Keroberos and politely asked if he could continue to study in his own room. Hei-ying smiled as he thought about his own room, it was order defined, Hei-ying's own floor length curtain were a deep forest green, and it had stars and blood red roses embroidered on it. Master Clow had handmade them himself; he and Hei-ying had silently decorated the room together, and then had celebrated the finished room together that night.  
  
Hei-ying snorted scornfully as he stepped on one of Keroberos' beloved stuffed toys, the lion was living a prolonged childhood, he had decided, Master Clow hadn't forced Keroberos to learn how to talk properly, how to read, how to even fly properly. Or at least, he hadn't done this at the same rate as he had with Hei-ying. Their lessons were filled with unnecessary laughter, while Hei-ying's had been enlightening, charged experiences. He sighed and kicked the toy away; Keroberos had wasted much of his life playing with such ridiculous thing.  
  
A cough from the bed made Hei-ying look up, his jade eyes narrowed. If Master Clow removed all the ponds, how was he going to teach Keroberos respect for the Master? He sighed; //I will just have to find another way . . .//  
  
"Clow?" Keroberos' unfocused golden eyes landed on him.  
  
"You should call him Master Clow!" Hei-ying snapped, Keroberos winced; he had a splitting head, and was very weary.  
  
"Hei-ying? What are you doing here? Where's Clow?"  
  
In a lightening strike, Hei-ying slammed his hand down on Keroberos' sore head, "Call him Master!"  
  
Keroberos winced again and shrank away slightly, "Get away from me!"  
  
Hei-ying grabbed the lion by the scruff of his neck. "If you hadn't struggled . . ." he hissed quietly.  
  
"What do you mean?!" Keroberos moved his head around to stare at him, a realisation hit him hard, "You tried to drown me, didn't you?!"  
  
Hei-ying's eyes narrowed, and he said nothing.  
  
Keroberos pulled away from him, "When Clow finds out . . .!"  
  
Hei-ying rose and stepped to the door, he sniggered and smirked lightly, he turned back and stared at Keroberos with his unblinking jade eyes, "What make you think Master Clow doesn't already know . . .?"  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Kero: [Angry] Lemme at him! Lemme at him!!  
  
DrM: Clow and Hei-ying aren't here . . .  
  
Kero: Where are they then?  
  
DrM: Off having a break . . . that and I'm sick of Clow's snide remarks about my sanity . . .  
  
Kero: But you are always calling yourself insane . . .  
  
DrM: [Folds arms obstinately] Yeah, but I don't like people *agreeing* with me! [Glares at the Blue Goo]  
  
Kero: Hoe! [Looks around] so where's Yue?  
  
Yue: [Gagged] Mmmm mmm mmm!!  
  
DrM: [Shoves Yue under carpet] Oh, I'd say he's in the next update . . .  
  
Kero: What's that suspiosuly Yue-shaped lump you are sitting on?  
  
DrM: [Grins] Not a clue! Please R&R!!! 


	12. Courage

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
In This Tainted Soul . . .  
  
  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
Part Eleven: Courage  
  
[Guess what happens when DrM is exposed to too much CCS mp3s . . . and if you know of any good websites with mp3s . . . please share!! But NO midis . . . they are evil . . . not in the good, wholesome DrM way . . . I LOVE PLATINUM!!!]  
  
  
  
Clow had ordered a stagecoach to take the trio to the nearby town, it had been a while since they had last been and Clow wanted to get Keroberos used to the idea that there were other people inhabiting the earth. He stared worryingly at Keroberos; the lion had been very quiet since the attempted drowning incident. Clow had tried on several occasions to cheer him up, but even his favourite card, the Sweet, hadn't been able to cheer him up. Every attempt, Clow would catch Keroberos looking at him strangely as if he was confused by Clow's behaviour. Hei-ying was staring out the window, dressed in his depressing robes again. Clow glanced at Keroberos again, the lion held his eyes for a few moments until he looked away.  
  
That . . . hurt.  
  
Clow didn't understand what he had done to make Keroberos . . . he didn't even know what was wrong. Their lessons began to seem like the ones he used to give Hei-ying, after Hilligans, they were lifeless, and heavy. Clow sighed, if Keroberos began to turn into Hei-ying, he would be alone again. Clow squeezed his eyes shut, and swallowed, not willing to let either of his creations see their Master cry. He took an unsteady breath and turned his head to the window, he felt like a failure. He couldn't create anything that would keep him company; maybe he should just give---  
  
"I'm still a kid, and I'm not nearly as powerful as Clow . . ." Clow turned at the sound of his name; the Cardcaptor was standing there, clutching her staff. She stepped forward, and held her hands to him. He realised she wasn't looking at him, she was talking to someone else, but the vision had elected to show him this . . .  
  
She twirled the staff once, and grabbed it decisively, "But I'll work hard at it!"  
  
Clow stepped towards her and tried to grab her hands, "I know you will!" He blurted, "But how can you hope to control the cards, when I have given you such dysfunctional guardians?!"  
  
She smiled, and started to vanish. Clow twirled in the darkness as her voice continued to echo around him, "Rather than being the Mistress . . . the Mistress . . . Mistress . . ."  
  
Clow tripped and fell backwards; he thought he was going to fall into the darkness. "WHOA!!" He cried as he landed on something warm, it jerked him, and he had to grab it's soft fur. Clow gasped as Keroberos smiled happily over his shoulder, the golden lion had a strange hat, or a helmet on, it had a bright red jewel set deep on its crown. He laughed and spread his wings. Keroberos was older, Clow realised //. . .and larger//. Clow laughed as Keroberos beat his wings strongly, he suddenly realised that they were flying, in a sky that was impossibly blue. He grasped the gold fur tightly as Keroberos took him on several high loose loops. "Rather than being the Mistress . . ."  
  
"Ikou yo, ikou yo, ikou yo! Tsubasa hiroge!" Keroberos sang happily, Clow smiled and hugged his sun guardian tightly, the lion was singing a beautiful Japanese song about going flying and spreading wings. Another few loops and Clow realised they were alone anymore, there were more winged creatures flying though the bright blue sky with him. Clow raised his head to look at them, the pink butterfly girl was in front and she was giggling happily as she looped back towards Clow, she handed him a large hat Clow recognised as his own. He never wore it because it was large and heavy, but it was very warm in winter. Clow laughed as she stole it out of his hands and placed it on his head. She hugged him briefly, flew around him and held his hand before pulling away. A sudden blur of black obscured his vision as Hei-ying flew around Keroberos, before falling into a steady flight obediently by his side. Hei-ying's hair was slightly different and he had dragon wings rather than his feathered white wings. The black-scaled appendages beat steadily as Hei-ying turned his head to stare at him, his vastly shorter fringe covering half his face.  
  
"HOLD ON TIGHT!" Keroberos roared as he suddenly dipped down. Clow held on to the back of his hat, as a huge dragon flew over him, Clow tipped his head back as the hard scaled underbelly of the dragon came dangerously over head. It was like the fly spirit in her full bird form, it was massive. "WAI!" Clow cried as it and Hei-ying peeled off.  
  
"Rather than being the Mistress . . ." the girl's voice sounded again.  
  
A beautiful, midnight blue panther twirled in the air, his black butterfly wings betraying a healthy sheen in the sunlight. The large blue panther pulled up alongside them, carrying the large gilded staff in his mouth, Clow grabbed it and petted the blue creature between the ears. "Arigato!!" He cried as the panther peeled away.  
  
He gasped as the Fly card sudden materialised in his hand.  
  
"Give it a try!" Keroberos laughed deeply. Clow stood uncertainly on his sun lion's back, and held up his staff. He took a moment to enjoy the sensation of flying on Keroberos, the sunshine was beautiful and while Hei- ying and the dragon had disappeared, the butterfly girl and panther flew side by side with Keroberos. He threw the fly upwards as he suddenly jumped into the air.  
  
His hair trailed upwards as he managed to strike the card, "FLY!!" He tumbled and rolled in the air before stabilising, he looked up to see the panther, nod down at him, then peel away to reveal the . . .  
  
"Rather than being the Mistress . . ."  
  
. . .the butterfly girl smiled and giggled before rolling in the air to reveal. . .  
  
". . .The Mistress . . ."  
  
. . .Keroberos growl playfully as he looked down at Clow, he winked and pranced in the air, he rolled to the other side to reveal. . .  
  
". . .Rather than being the Mistress . . ."  
  
. . . the sunlight obstructed his view as the last figure looped elegantly in the air, there was a blur of white before Clow looked up again the figure was gone. He sighed and looked to the other side of him, the butterfly girl and the blue panther were on one side, they stared defiantly ahead, as they match his speed perfectly. He whipped his head around to see Keroberos grin at him; the lion beat his strong wings and started to pull ahead. Clow watch him briefly before he was aware that something had moved into Keroberos' place beside him. The elegant figure was back; it was the white haired angel. He looked focused as he maintained the same speed as Clow's winged staff. Clow was amazed by the finesse of the beautiful creature; he scrapped back the strands of his black hair to keep his eyes on the calm being. He smiled as the angel looked at him, and nodded. Clow nodded back, and the angel and the two other winged creatures pulled ahead of Clow. He watched as they pulled of some impressive manoeuvres together. They span and dived together, like a team, then the two cats looped back and dived towards him. They took up positions beside him. Clow was watching the two winged humanoid beings, as he concentrated on the white haired angel, which was the other guardian Clow would one day create. He wondered when the angel would come into his life. He waited for the angel to turn and say 'Whenever you decide it.'  
  
A laugh from his left caught his attention. "Not just yet," a rather neatly bred English accent said. Clow gasped, as he looked over to the blue panther, the blue haired boy was back, riding the panther as Clow had Keroberos. He laughed again as the panther rolled once. Something was missing Clow thought, the boy was wearing robes similar to his, but something was missing from them. Clow snapped his fingers as he pulled off the hat, and handed it to the boy. He laughed as he pulled it over his short blue hair, "Arigato!!"  
  
"Wai!!" A sweet, girlish giggle made Clow turn his head to the right and saw that Keroberos was now carrying the Cardcaptor. "Faster!! Onegai Kero- chan! Faster!!" She squealed, and bravely lifted her hands into the air, trusting Keroberos so much with her frail child body. A beautiful crown now lay on her honeyed locks, and she was now wearing a pale yellow dress with tiny wings on the back.  
  
He smiled as Keroberos laughed, "But of course!!" He roared as he pulled away. "Daijobu! Let's show our guts!!" Clow's heart lifted to realise, that Keroberos wasn't always going to be like this, not trusting Clow, and that the Cardcaptor was going to be happy with him.  
  
He looked up at the two winged angels, they were flying back towards him, the girl flew with . . .Clow suddenly realised that he could ask the blue haired boy who he was, "MATTE!! Who are you? What's your name?" He called over to the three beside him.  
  
"Eriol!" The boy smiled, "My name . . . it's*Eriol*!!" He shook a pale white finger at Clow, "And remember this, Clow Reed . . . Never give up!!" He reached over and clamped his small pale hand on Clow's arm, Clow still couldn't make out his eyes, but Clow knew they were filled with confidence, "We're depending on you!"  
  
Eriol waved as he and his guardians pulled away again. The white angel flew along Clow's left, he was smiling as he spread his arms forward, and did some tight rolls, he was happy, Clow realised, the white haired angel was blissfully happy, and free up here in the deep blue sky. The white angel's short white fringe hid his eyes from Clow, but Clow didn't mind, it made him happy to see such a free being. A laugh from the other side made him turn his head; the Cardcaptor and Keroberos were back. "Hello Cardcaptor . . ." Clow ventured and was rewarded with a sharp gasp from the Cardcaptor.  
  
"Cl-Clow-sama?!"  
  
Clow smiled and nodded, "I'm glad to see you and Keroberos are getting along." He laughed as they did a roll together, "May I ask . . . what is your name?"  
  
But the girl didn't seem to hear him, she stared at him and Clow realised she was beginning to fade, as was the angel, and Keroberos. The blue sky turned dark and Clow realised he was on the ground again. The Cardcaptor's voice sounded once more, "Rather than being the Mistress. . . I would like to be your friend. . ."  
  
A cherry blossom floated in front of him, and he knew the beautiful vision was ending.  
  
"Never give up . . . be your friend . . . Daijobu! Let's show our guts!! . . . we're depending on you . . . hold on . . ." the voices from his vision overlapped and echoed in his mind. Clow caught the cheery blossom, and stared at it, wondering what relevance a cherry blossom had to the Cardcaptor.  
  
"Kitto . . ."  
  
  
  
"Master?" Keroberos rested a warm paw on his Master's thigh, Clow had fallen into a deep sleep, and was now speaking, repeating 'probably . . .' in one of the many languages Clow had taught him, Keroberos fumbled slightly as he tried to remember the which language it was. "Kitto . . ." Clow mumbled again, then Keroberos realised it was Japanese. "Kitto . . ." Clow frowned in his sleep and opened his eyes.  
  
"Kitto . . .?" Keroberos put both his front paws on Clow's lap and pushed up onto his hind legs, "Kitto . . .?"  
  
"Eh!" Clow jerked slightly as he realised how close Keroberos was, "What?"  
  
"Kittoooo?" Keroberos asked, very curious as to what Clow had been dreaming about. "Kitto what?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You were saying 'Kitto' . . . probably what?"  
  
Clow's mouth hung opened as he tried to recall what it was, he shrugged, "I've forgotten."  
  
Keroberos sighed, and returned to his seat. He was still confused by what Hei-ying had said. Clow never seemed like he wanted Hei-ying to kill him, but still he was aware that Clow had a few problems, he dared a glance at Hei-ying, the star guardian was staring out of the window, legs and arms crossed. Keroberos wondered what Hei-ying was thinking; he seemed used to the deep sleeps that Clow every-so-often fell into. They unnerved Keroberos, always had done since he was a kitten and Clow had just collapsed onto the floor, only to wake up a few moments later as if nothing had happened. Hei-ying was quiet; they hadn't exchanged any conversation since Hei-ying had come into his room, and made him doubt the truthfulness behind Clow's ever-pleasant countenance.  
  
He looked at Clow; he looked like he was on the verge of tears again. The magician tried so hard to hide his sad faces from them but recently had been starting to fail. Keroberos knew part of this was his own fault; he just couldn't get the idea out of his head that Hei-ying might be telling the truth. Perhaps Clow regretted his creation, Keroberos was aware that he was the complete opposite to Hei-ying, that he was neither as obedient nor as smart as Hei-ying but still Clow had never seemed like the type of person who could bare to be so silent for so long. Keroberos felt cold, saddened to realise that Clow might want him to be more like Hei-ying now that he had grown up.  
  
  
  
The town was very busy, and Clow had told Keroberos not to say anything because the inhabitants of the town had never seen a lion before much less a talking lion. He stuck close to Clow's side instinctively as they weaved in and out of the stalls, the other people looked nothing like Clow, Clow was pale and orderly but these other people . . . he smelt the air, they were all so different. He growled as some small person tugged at his tail. Clow patted his lower back, encouraging him to sit. "Excuse me. . .?" He called to the squealing kids.  
  
Keroberos glared at the kid that had yanked his tail, the child was giggling uncontrollably and was quite dirty. This amused Keroberos knowing that Clow had instructed Hei-ying that he wouldn't be able to use his powers of levitation. This would mean Hei-ying would be conscious of the fact that his boots, which Clow had created especially for the town visit, would be getting horrendously dirty. //Good!// he thought, as he sat patiently with Clow, the magician was explaining to the kids that Keroberos was a lion.  
  
"Clow Reed?!" A voice called through the crowd, "Clow *Reed*!"  
  
Clow produced some sweets from his pocket and handed them to the children, he never actually carried any in there, he just called them into existence. He petted them on the head, and ushered them away as a short, portly gentleman weaved his way through the crowd. He grabbed Clow's arms and tugged him away from the crowd. Keroberos growled slightly as the man pulled Clow away, Hei-ying's hand glowed a bit. Clow stopped and halted the man, "Come on! Don't worry, he's an old friend of mine!"  
  
Once they were away from prying ears by a small steam and pond with a small stone bridge over it, the short man pulled Clow into a tight hug, "I'd know that aura anywhere, Clow Reed!"  
  
Clow nodded, "I know I've been . . ."  
  
"Hidden away from the magical world for almost a century now!" The portly man laughed and clapped Clow hard on the shoulder. Clow stumbled a little and, in a bat of an eyelid, Hei-ying stood between him and the ruddy-faced man. "Do not touch the Master!" He hissed.  
  
The portly gentleman took a step back, "And who are you?"  
  
Hei-ying took another threatening step towards him, before Clow held his shoulders. He was surprised to feel Hei-ying was trembling in rage. "It's okay . . ." Clow murmured into his ear, "It's all right, I know him."  
  
Hei-ying turned his head slightly to listen to Clow, he wasn't actually scared of the portly gentleman, but he didn't like anyone to touch Clow when he couldn't. When Hei-ying nodded his head, and stepped behind him, Clow motioned his good friend over to the small bridge, they sat on the wall. "Clow . . . who is this and where on earth did you get that . . ." he motioned at Keroberos, "That thing?"  
  
Clow motioned Hei-ying closer, "This is Hei-ying and. . ." he beckoned Keroberos closer, "This is Keroberos." He turned slightly to address Hei- ying and Keroberos, "I'd like you both to say hello to a good friend of mine, he is the Reed family doctor . . . Doctor Louison."  
  
Hei-ying looked from the doctor to Master Clow, and then pursed his lips together. He bowed curtly, "Ohayo."  
  
"Pardon me?" The doctor raised an eyebrow at the unfamiliar greeting.  
  
Hei-ying's eyes narrowed slightly, Keroberos knew this was because Hei-ying hated repeating himself. Keroberos glanced at Clow, the magician was staring at Hei-ying, disappointment colouring his expression. Keroberos knew he wasn't supposed to but he tentatively reached out with his mind to find out what his Master was thinking. Clow was so horrified by Hei-ying's behaviour that he didn't notice the hesitant mental intruder pluck the foremost thought from his mind.  
  
Keroberos almost gasped aloud when he heard Clow think, //. . . Social failures . . . The both of them . . . I've made such a horrible mistake, the Cardcaptor will never survive . . .// Keroberos frowned, then shook his head, he never thought Clow would actually think of them as failures, //Well . . .// Keroberos drew a deep breath as he glanced at Hei-ying, //He can be the social failure, but I won't let Clow down! I'll . . . I'll show my guts!//  
  
"I'm Keroberos!" He stepped forward, and smiled, "And a *very* good morning to you!"  
  
The doctor's eyes widened, "My goodn--. . . Clow! You created this. . ."  
  
"Lion, I'm a lion, I was created under the influence of the sun!" Keroberos cheerfully supplied.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Indeed!" Keroberos wasn't too sure how to approach the stranger, but one look at Clow's surprised face made him feel daring. He leapt up onto the wall between his creator and the Reed family doctor. "I'm a Reed too! Or at least that what Clow tells me!" He began to chat happily away to the stranger, aware that Clow had begun to smile hopefully behind him.  
  
  
  
"So. . . this mansion of yours. . ." Louison asked as they travelled back in the stagecoach, "Is that where you've been hiding all these years?"  
  
"I haven't been hiding."  
  
"Clow, nobody has seen you since your parents died, you packed up and left after the funeral . . . both the Reed's and the Li's have been worried sick about you and have been accusing the other of your abduction." He leant forward; "You do know how important you are, don't you?"  
  
Clow sighed and shook his head, "I know . . . since I was old enough to speak, I've been told that I was going to bring a new dawn to magic. Oracles and fortunes have all been saying the same thing since the day I was born . . ." He snorted cynically, "I am the one who will bring magic to a new level, no one of my family would ever shut up about it . . . I was spoiled rotten, but I couldn't have any friends, no time for playing like normal children, the instant I could hold up a sword, I was trained . . . only my parents and my uncle seemed to take any pity on me, and then they died . . ." He looked down at Keroberos who had fallen sound asleep, he was resting his head in Clow's lap, "I . . . needed to get away . . ."  
  
Hei-ying's head lolled slightly, as he sat opposite, he too was fast asleep. The day out had exhausted both guardians, the doctor continued. "Clow, you cannot escape your responsibilities . . . the magic world needs new blood like yours to help create new magic." He motioned to the two guardians, "And I can see you've already begun to create life forms with consciousnesses . . . they are a remarkable achievement."  
  
Clow rubbed between Keroberos' ears affectionately, "I adore them . . . they will make excellent guardians."  
  
"Guardians . . . Guardians of what?"  
  
"Of. . ." Clow sighed, "I've already created the new magic, and I am the only one that can use them . . ."  
  
"What?!" The doctor sat up suddenly, Keroberos growled slightly in his sleep and turned his head away from the surprised doctor, and Clow motioned him to be quieter. The doctor nodded, "What is it? The new magic? Is it powerful . . . can you control it?"  
  
"Of course I can . . ." Clow whispered.  
  
"Then why do you need guardians?"  
  
"For after I die . . . I'm going to seal the cards, my new magic, in a book, until the right person comes along, and then and only then will the cards be released again."  
  
"You're going to stop the magic world from using them . . . how long will we have to wait until this . . . this new Master of the cards appears?"  
  
"I don't know exactly, but we'll be long gone by then, that I am sure of . . ."  
  
"Clow . . . the magic world is already beginning to die . . ."  
  
"I know. . . but there isn't anyone in this life honourable enough to use them. . . the Cardcaptor will be."  
  
"But Clow . . ."  
  
"No!" Clow snapped quietly, "I have seen the Cardcaptor . . . she will look after my cards, and she will never use my cards for personal gain . . . I can't say she won't use them to help her . . . but she's never going to try to destroy anyone with it . . . or try to force *dying* faiths upon people who simply don't believe anymore."  
  
"Clow . . ." The Doctor chuckled lightly and patted the younger man on the knee affectionately, "If there's been one thing you've always been, you've always been stubborn . . ."  
  
  
  
Clow stared out the window of the stagecoach; they had let the doctor off at his practice a little way out of town. The doctor was also the town's doctor, and had been for quite sometime. He would disappear every few decades and come back under a different name, once he was out of living memory. Clow sighed; the doctor had brought back some of the more unpleasant memories of his childhood.  
  
His mother, a beautiful Chinese woman, had always been very stubborn, and could be quite scary when provoked, but she had been independent. Unlike other female members of her clan, she never allowed her magic skills to go untrained. She had done so since she had demanded that her foot binds be removed, and that she was allowed to go train with her brother.  
  
Her brother, Clow's uncle, Hei-ying, had been a tough inflexible man, and he was the one that had installed the idea in Clow that he must never cry in front of anyone, for that would be a sign of weakness and anyone would take that as a way to defeat you. Despite this, Hei-ying had been a kind man to Clow, even with his objection to his parents' marriage. He had a furious glare, and could often break even Clow, who had been known to be even more stubborn than his mother. He had dark brown, piercing eyes, with a dark chocolate mop of short hair, which he obstinately refused to grow long into the traditional Chinese way. He looked almost exactly like that boy in the green robes, Clow reflected. Since Clow was the only child between his mother and father, Hei-ying's family line must have been carefully planned. Their blood must have been painstakingly kept clear of weaker magical blood, to ensure that the Li clan were ready for whatever magic Clow would release on the world. Clow laughed slightly, the Li's had been better prepared for Clow's magic than the Reed's had, they must have expected him to pull something like this.  
  
Clow thought about his father, he hadn't been like the typical Reed, the Reed's were treated like the magical realm's answer to royalty. Because of this, many of the Reed's were very arrogant, but not Clow's father, he had been an honest hard-working man who had married for love rather than family honour. He was kind, and was always very practical.  
  
Clow had loved the three very dearly, as they were the only ones who didn't remind him at every turn that he was going to do something special when he grew up. Instead they started to train him, prepare him for the various obstacles in his way. Teaching him every magic they knew of, training him in every magical style.  
  
Clow looked at his guardians, //And now I am teaching you as well . . .// Keroberos' eyes fluttered open. He sat up groggily, and stared at Clow. He frowned, and then passed a look at Hei-ying. The black haired star guardian was still fast asleep, Keroberos looked out the window, it was nearing nightfall. He glanced at Clow again, who was smiling slightly, he looked uncertain. He raised a hand to Keroberos' cheek. "Are you . . . did you sleep well?"  
  
Keroberos stared hard at Clow, trying to see if there was a grain of truth to what Hei-ying said, that Clow really wanted him dead, and he was going to let Hei-ying do his dirty work. The magician was still young, in comparison to the other magicians Clow had read to him about. And to Keroberos, Clow had never wished any inch of pain against him.  
  
As Keroberos was making this internal comparison, Clow's hand dropped and lay in his lap, Keroberos had rejected him Clow decided. He was becoming just like Hei-ying, a silent servant, and one who would never ever even think about disagreeing with his Master.  
  
Clow's heart constricted slightly, he felt a little jealous of the Cardcaptor, she was going to bring Keroberos back . . . back to the jolly, happy kitten that Clow used to sleep on his study's window seat with. Clow bit back a small whimper and turn his head to the window. He began to curse himself for being weak as a tear began to slide down his cheek. He felt trapped again, trapped and alone. He didn't dare even think that he would create a third guardian in this life, the third would become like Keroberos, and ultimately Hei-ying and Clow would truly be the failure he always knew he—  
  
"Don't." Clow looked back at Keroberos. The lion was now staring at him with open concern. "Don't think like that."  
  
"How do you . . .?"  
  
"I've been . . ." Keroberos looked at the fading red seat; "I've been looking at your thoughts . . ."  
  
"Then you know. You know how I've failed you and I've failed your brother, and now . . . I've failed the Cardcaptor."  
  
"Don't!" Keroberos growled softly. "I don't want you to think like this! You're not, and if you give up now then you have failed the Cardcaptor." He put a heavy paw on Clow's arm, "You've gotta start showing your guts!"  
  
Clow opened his mouth to respond, and then closed it as he thought of something else, "Why have you been so hushed around me lately?"  
  
Keroberos was silent for a few moments, he didn't think that Hei-ying was right anymore, but still he didn't want to take the risk, so he lied, "I was . . . just a little scared after I heard you had destroyed all the ponds . . . I thought you might be a bit angry at me for getting myself caught in the water."  
  
Clow's eyes widened, then he breathed out quickly. "You thought I was angry at you for nearly getting drowned?!" He turned and threw his arms around Keroberos; "I was so worried about you . . . I couldn't get angry at you for something like that even if I tried!!"  
  
  
  
Hei-ying began to reawaken as they drew nearer to the mansion; they were passing through the barrier that kept trespassers out, he looked over at Master Clow. Keroberos was still lying in his lap, and Master Clow rested his hand on the lion's head, Hei-ying scowled at the scene, he hadn't had much of a chance to attempt another try on Keroberos' life. Master Clow had ordered him to help train Keroberos, and so he would have to wait until Keroberos' training was complete before he could try again. He wondered how he could do it, now that Master Clow had removed the ponds. Keroberos was getting to the point where he could sustain himself, and he had been leaving Master Clow alone since Hei-ying had first tried to drown him. Hei- ying sighed, allowing himself to stare at his handsome Master, perhaps now that Keroberos was older, Master Clow would want to resume their relationship. Hei-ying smiled, he decided he would approach the Master about it *soon*.  
  
  
  
The next few days, and Keroberos returned to his normal personality, for this Clow was infinitely glad. It meant that he wasn't getting it wrong; that one day the Cardcaptor would have two very strong and wise guardians she could depend on. Clow was in his study alone as he was cleaning; it had been a while since he had last ordered everything in here. Papers scrawled with incantations, and spells, notes on the safety catches he placed on the cards, detailed descriptions of Hei-ying and Keroberos, everything he had created he had made orderly description about.  
  
He had left them for the Cardcaptor originally, so that she would be able to understand the magic that she was given. He was going to leave them with the Li family he had decided, since they would be more responsible with it. He hoped that the books he would create from the notes would be passed down, read and understood. Clow thought that the girl would be from the Li family, since he was the only one that could use the cards; he assumed that it would only be his descendants that would be also.  
  
Clow smiled as he came across the doodled pictures of other forms he had been thinking of creating for Keroberos and Hei-ying. He was very aware that they couldn't go out in public as they were, but they also found it very hard to not use their powers. His original idea was that he would create a sort of false form for them. Forms they could revert to when they didn't need their powers, Hei-ying's was a human boy, with chocolate brown short hair, but he would keep his jade green eyes. Keroberos' had been a little more fun, a tiny golden toy like thing with wings and a long tail with a small white poof of fur at the end. Clow had kept this secret from them, because he wasn't entirely sure how they would take to the idea that Clow wanted to be able to hide their true forms.  
  
Putting these papers safely in a different drawer, he picked up a rough scrap of paper, this held doodles of the midnight blue panther, he had been wondering recently if he was meant to create the butterfly girl and the panther, but he had recently come to the conclusion that they weren't going to be created by him . . . their wings had been the tip off, he preferred white angel wings, and although he liked butterflies, he couldn't see himself creating such creatures.  
  
He put the papers on the desk and picked up a small folded square of paper. He wondered what it was as he began to unfold it, it had his handwriting all over it. He frowned bemusedly as he turned it the right way up. It had doodles of stars and suns and moons all over it, and names, the same names repeated and redefined. Near the stars it read: 'Hi-yin, Hei-yan, Hei-ying' and 'Cerberus, Keroberos, Keroberosu' was decorated by the suns, Clow laughed slightly as he twisted the paper to read the names under the moons, 'Moon-yang, Hei-yang, Lunar, Lun-yang, Yang'. Clow frowned as he squinted to read one name that had been scribbled hurriedly. It was the last name he had been considering, but he had only just come up with it a few seconds before he was due to leave, hence it's illegibility. "You . . . Hugh . . .Hmmm . . ." He readjusted his spectacles and glanced out the window, it was getting late in the afternoon and the red light pouring in though the window meant the sun was setting. Clow put the paper on the desk and stared out the window.  
  
The late autumn was turning into winter, but still was quite dry. His garden was starting to prepare for winter, but the magicked plants Clow kept were feeling the effect of the dryness. Clow sighed, and opened the window. He pulled out the Storm card, "Storm . . . create for me a rain storm to keep my plants well fed" he murmured as he tapped it lightly with his staff, "Release!"  
  
After turning the staff back to a key, Clow lit a lamp on his desk and resumed his cleaning, forgetting about the tiny slip of paper that held the name of his final guardian, as it slipped off his desk and floated under his desk.  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------  
  
And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
Clow: Wonder who that could be?  
  
DrM: Hmm?  
  
Clow: Name on the paper. . . wonder who that could be?  
  
DrM: I don't know. . . hmmmm. . .  
  
[Clow and DrM sit back and press a finger against their lips, staring into nowhere as they think about it]  
  
Hei-ying: Love of sanity. . .  
  
Kero: Bah! As if you could talk!  
  
Hei-ying: [ignoring Kero] . . .Please R&R!!! 


	13. Yue

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twelve: Yue

It was late when Clow stretched and yawned, he rubbed the back of his neck and got up, he had finally finished, he had bound the bundles of papers into books, there was one book for Keroberos, one for the cards and one for Hei-ying, each book held detailed descriptions, how to defeat the cards, where to find each guardian on the Clow book. He had decided to put Keroberos on the cover, just as he and seen in his vision, Keroberos would be in a fearsome looking picture. As a picture, it would show Keroberos with golden eyes, and his large white wings, and he would have his symbol, the sun, on a chain in front of him. It would symbolise his position as the guardian of the seal. Hei-ying's symbol would go on the spine of the book, symbolising his position as the adviser, his symbol would be a long thorny rose, with a chain twining around it, then the chain would have a dozen little stars on it. 

Clow got up and walked over to his window seat, he picked up the Clow book as he sat down. He passed his hand over the front cover, the spine. He turned over the book, and rested his hand on the back. There he had decided to put his own magic circle, it was etched with gold upon the scarlet surface. He smiled as his hand slipped below it to rest on the empty space below. He looked out the window, it was getting late, he thought. 

Keroberos yawned as he hopped onto his bed, the sun had been setting earlier and earlier and he was having trouble drawing power from it. He shook his head and rested it on his summer yellow pillow. He was just beginning to dose when he heard a knock at his door, //Who is it?// he thought, thinking it might be Hei-ying.

//It's me. . .// Clow thought back uncertainly.

//Oh. . . well, come in// Keroberos sat up to greet his Master as Clow came in quietly. Clow was carrying a small lamplight, and was staring at Keroberos puzzled. "Why did you ask who it was?" He asked.

Keroberos yawned, "Just curious," he answered simply.

Clow nodded, and moved over to place the lamp on Keroberos' bedside. He smiled at the slightly worn stuffed bear he had made for Keroberos. It was in the form of the false form Clow had been considering, Clow picked it up gently, the poor thing had been chewed when Keroberos had been teething, it had been thrown about when Keroberos had had tantrums, and was lovingly slobbered over because Keroberos used to carry it everywhere with him. It's faded yellow fur was mussed but still soft, one of it's widely set black button eyes was hanging loose, but they still had a certain shine to them. Clow smiled as he held the tiny toy towards Keroberos and moved it's arms towards him. In a high-pitched voice, Clow squeaked, "Modern-yaki! Modern-yaki! Make me modern-yaki!!" he sat on the bed next to Keroberos who was now laughing quietly, "Modern . . . yaki?"

"I don't sound like that!" 

Clow reached over and patted his head. "Of course not, it's much more deeper!"

Keroberos snorted, and then lay back down. He yawned widely, he was sleepy, "What are we going to do tomorrow?"

Clow sighed, "Probably some more training . . . although I think we have covered most of everything that you need to know . . ."

Keroberos was silent for a bit, "What about teaching me about the cards?" He was curious about them, and although he knew their names, he only knew the barest of facts about them, how to catch only a few of them.

"Keroberos, you are the appointer, Hei-ying will be the adviser, there's no need for you to know how to catch the cards, and your job is to choose the Cardcaptor and provide protection for her, leave the teaching to Hei-ying."

Keroberos thought about this too, "But what if something goes wrong and somehow Hei-ying can't tell her what to do?"

Clow smiled again, and rubbed his head affectionately, "Don't worry so much Keroberos . . . only worry what happens after when the cards are retrieved." 

"Have you decided?" Keroberos sat up; Clow had never said what would happen after the Cardcaptor had caught the cards. 

Clow smiled, "Yes I have . . . Hei-ying and you are to judge her." 

"Judge her?" 

"Mmm-Hmm . . ." Clow stood and walked over to the window, it was dark now and the Storm card was raging quite heartily. "You will put her through a test, see if she can handle the cards well enough . . ."

"Enough . . ." Keroberos let this sink in, "How will we know if she can handle them enough?"

Clow turned, his hands clasped behind his back, "You will have to fight her . . . make her use every card in her possession, to defeat you and Hei-ying . . ."

Keroberos frowned slightly; he didn't like the idea of attacking someone he was supposed to protect . . . "I don't want to hurt her . . ." he said softly, he actually meant he didn't like the idea of allowing Hei-ying the opportunity to hurt her, but he didn't think Clow realised that Hei-ying could get so dangerous.

Clow looked at him, "You won't . . . I have faith in her that she will overcome you . . ."

"If she doesn't?"

Clow blinked, this was something he hadn't thought of . . . he hadn't considered the idea that the Cardcaptor might fail this judgement. He frowned, if she failed then the cards might become unstable and then she would have either destroy them, which Clow doubted she'd be able to, or allow them to turn loose, but this would leave them open to attack. The cards would go wild without a proper source of magic . . .

He sighed and sat on the end of Keroberos' bed, he knew he had forgotten something. Keroberos got up and padded along the bed, he sighed as well, and rested his head on Clow's, "You didn't think about that, did you?"

"Iie." Clow murmured quietly, he had to think of something that would make the Cardcaptor fight her hardest so that she wouldn't dare lose, so she would fight all the way. Some sort of consequence that would befall . . . not just her, but the world, should she fail to capture the cards and win the judgement. Clow folded his arms and thought hard, Keroberos smiled gently, Clow was warm. The lion always slept best when Clow was near, his presence, his aura was always very warm. He was just dropping off to sleep, when Clow started to speak, "If the Cardcaptor . . . fails the final . . . Iie . . . if the candidate chosen by. . ."

"Keroberos . . ." Keroberos supplied. Clow smiled and reached up to pet the lion's large head, then laughed slightly at the big cat's deep responding purr.

"If the candidate chosen by Keroberos the Appointer, guided by Hei-ying the Adviser can not defeat . . ." Clow paused, that didn't make much sense, "If the candidate . . ."

Keroberos cracked an eye open, Clow was having a bit of trouble, Keroberos stood and jumped off the bed lightly. He moved in front of his Master, and rested a chin on his knee. The lion stared up at him, Clow shrugged, "I can't make the world just blow up . . . the Cardcaptor might be too scared of me if I say she has to collect my cards or everyone will die . . . but it has to be something too . . ." he paused and stared at Keroberos, the lion was starting to doze a little again. 

He loved Keroberos a lot he reflected, he looked up at the door, and thought about Hei-ying, he also loved Hei-ying . . . Clow wondered, if Hei-ying was the mysterious angel, then Clow would come to love him even more but then . . . Clow looked out the window, the white haired angel was still to come, and he knew he would love that one as well, like he did Hei-ying and Keroberos, the love any creator had for his creations. He thought about Marcibay, he had adored the old man and had been inconsolable when the old man he drowned. 

// Death . . .// Clow frowned slightly, perhaps that would be a consequence of failure, but then Clow would have to chose someone close to the Cardcaptor that would have to suffer the consequence. He thought briefly about her family perhaps, but then decided against it, that would be too cruel and Clow wasn't like that, he couldn't just murder one of her family. Keroberos started to snore a little, Clow was reminded of his flying vision; the Cardcaptor had been so trusting of Keroberos, and the two had displayed affection towards each other. Clow's eyes widened as he instantly destroyed the idea that the consequence could be that if she failed, then Keroberos and Hei-ying would die. 

//No! // Clow thought, // I couldn't do something so horrible to my own creations, I couldn't just let her grow to love them and then take them away from her . . . // He petted Keroberos lightly, he knew that the cards would also miss him, all of his creations had grown so close to each other, it would be too painful for the cards to lose their guardians, to lose the Cardcaptor since they would inevitably treasure her as their next Master. 

Clow's petting slowed and stopped, as he came to the realisation that if the Cardcaptor lost, then the group of people he had seen in the pond the day he was shown Keroberos, the love they all shared, the experiences of the adventures they had had, plus the knowledge that she had failed would be too painful to remember. //It's not the world blowing up . . .// he thought, //And to some people it might not even be a disaster . . . but at least it would mean the Cardcaptor would realise that she would have to fight . . . // 

". . .To make sure she doesn't lose the people she loves . . ."

Keroberos frowned and opened his eyes, "What was that?" 

"The Cardcaptor." Clow explained, "In order to make sure that the cards, you and Hei-ying are well cared for after my . . ." he paused, he didn't want Keroberos to worry about that just yet, he continued, "When she captures the cards and faces you in the judgement, she will be told that if she fails, she will lose the people she loves . . ."

"The one she loves the most? You'd kill the one she loves the most?"

"No. . . Not kill, she'll . . . everyone involved with the cards, everyone around her, will lose the feeling of love."

"Permanently?" Keroberos raised his head off Clow's knee; he didn't like this idea either, "But what will happen to her then . . .?"

"She won't remember the cards, or you or Hei-ying, nobody will, and then you'll just have to pick another Cardcaptor, until the Cardcaptor is capable of controlling you two and the cards." 

"I don't mean that, what happens to the one she loves the most, what happens after you've stolen their love for each other?"

Clow stared at him, a stubborn look passed over his face, "I don't want to plan any further than that! I have faith in her . . . she will be able to defeat Yue."

Keroberos blinked, "Who?"

"Pardon?" Clow looked at his shocked guardian.

"Yue . . .?" Keroberos said, "You meant 'you', right? Well, you just said Yue."

"No. . ." Clow murmured as he frowned, "I'm fairly sure I said Yue." 

Keroberos sat up straighter, "There? See! You did it again!"

"Did I?" Clow looked slightly bewildered, he meant 'you' and was very sure that was what he was saying, but Keroberos was adamant that he was saying 'Yue'.

Clow slipped out the room quietly, it was getting close to midnight, and Keroberos had finally fallen asleep. //Yue . . . the Chinese word for moon . . .// he thought as he stepped down the corridor, why would he repeat the word? //Because it sounded so right . . .// a small voice replied in his mind.  He paused outside Hei-ying's door, and place a hand on the wood; he closed his eyes slightly as he looked at what Hei-ying was doing. The black haired angel was braiding his hair again, aware that he was being analysed. Clow stepped back from the door as Hei-ying opened it. His hair was tied back neatly, his night robe tied securely around his waist, "May I assist you, Master?" 

"I just wanted to wish you a good night, Hei-ying."

"Of course Master, I . . ." Hei-ying paused as if seeking permission, Clow nodded; "I wish you a good night as well."

Clow nodded once more and turned to walk down the corridor. He heard Hei-ying's door close quietly only when he was a respectable distance away. Clow sighed; perhaps Hei-ying would improve when the Cardcaptor met him. He paused at the top of the stairs and looked down the corridor, the dark hallway was briefly lit by lightening, the window at the end of the corridor always reminded him of the ghastly vision he had seen when he had first thought of creating the last four cards. He'd rarely thought about it over the years, but his hand started to rub the tender skin under his throat. Was he the dark figure who slit his . . .?

Clow shivered, //No.// he answered himself, not only would he never give Keroberos and the small boy on his back any cause to fear him, Clow would never kill himself. The very idea of taking a blade to his own throat was too disgusting to contemplate. 

Clow was about to step down the stairs when he suddenly remembered there was someone he had forgotten to say good night to. Smiling, he turned and walked back to the room three doors away from Keroberos, the room above his study. He knocked on the door, there was no answer. Clow smiled, //he must already be asleep . . .// he thought as he pushed the door open. He was just going to check on him and then he would leave . . . Clow chuckled slightly as he knew he would stay a little while longer and just stroke his hair.

 Clow looked up, as he entered the room. "What the . . .?" 

The room was empty, just as Clow had known it would be, but why would he think there was someone in here? It was a large space, somewhat similar to Keroberos', a large window and a hard wooden floor, but other than that the room was bare. Clow felt . . . //saddened? // Confused. Why did he feel like there should have been someone here? He sighed and turned around to walk out the door.

"Papa?"

"Yes, Yue?"

Clow turned, that was his voice, but he hadn't said anything. The room wasn't bare anymore, it was decorated similarly like //His brother's// Keroberos' and Hei-ying's rooms. Only this time it was light blues and purples, the large window was slightly open and the silk white curtains fluttered with the breeze. Clow's eyes fell on the large bed, again it was just like //His brother's// Keroberos' and Hei-ying's large soft four-poster beds. Through the sheer white drapes that hung around the bed, Clow could see Keroberos sitting on the bed; he was looking fondly at the head of the bed. Clow moved closer, and gasped as he saw himself . . . and a little boy. The tiny child was sitting up, legs crossed, facing away from Clow. Clow was brushing the boy's long white hair carefully, as the boy chatted away.

"What happens to the snow when sumber's here?"

"Summer . . ." Keroberos chuckled quietly, "It's called summer, moonbeam, and there's no snow in summer."

The boy's head snapped towards Keroberos, his tiny pale mouth hanging open with horror. He swivelled to look at Clow, who smile helplessly as the plait he had been working on was pulled out of his hands. "Really?!"

"Yes, Yue." Clow positioned the boy so he could start plaiting again, "Now keep still or I'll never be able to finish." 

"Does this mean all our snowmen will die?"

There was a sharp sigh, Hei-ying was stood just by the window, "Yue, how many more times must I tell you? Snow cannot die, it melts."

Yue's small head turned again, "Really?!"  

Hei-ying sighed again and pressed his forehead against the glass in annoyance. Clow nodded and chuckled as the long plait was torn out of his hands once again. Keroberos shook his head and also laughed quietly. "Yue . . ." Clow leant closer to the pale boy's face, he raised a hand to stroke his jaw, "I wish to finish plaiting your hair tonight . . . please keep still."

"Hai!" The small boy chirped, then frowned as Keroberos extended a claw and nabbed himself a cookie off a plate lying on the bed. "Keroberos!" The boy jumped after the stolen cookie, and left Clow laughing and shaking his head. 

Clow laughed too, aware that the people within the vision weren't aware of him this time. He smiled warmly; this was the next guardian that was going to be created. He moved slightly forward to see if he could get a closer view of the small boy, his hair was silky and moved over his shoulders easily. Clow wondered briefly if this was the weeping angel, the mysterious one from his dreams but he wasn't certain it was, the child had completely long hair, and the one from his dreams had a short, uneven fringe that partially covered one eye. 

"Papa! Make him give it back! That's my last cookie as well! I was saving it Keroberos!!"

Keroberos held the biscuit just out of the boy's reach, "I don't think you remember quite who you're speaking to . . . I'm Keroberos, guardian beast of the seal *and* your older brother!"

The boy stopped his jumping and folded his arms imperiously, he growled slightly. "My cookie!"

Keroberos licked his face cheekily, "And now it's my cookie!" He teased.

Clow smiled as Yue turned and sat in the vision's Clow's lap, "Fine then!" He stuck his tiny tongue out at the lion, "You can have the cookie . . . I'll just have Papa!"

Clow sighed, as he pressed a hand against the silken drapes, "But when will you come into my life?"

The Clow on the bed smiled gently then looked up, both Clow's stared at each other before Clow realised that this vision's Clow wasn't exactly aware he was there, it was just as if he was reacting to being told that Clow was standing there. "Patience . . ." he murmured.

"Huh?" Yue looked up at his Papa.

Clow smiled at him and ran a hand over his straight white hair; he hugged him briefly and murmured, "Nothing."

Keroberos moved closer and handed Yue back his biscuit, "You have a lot of problems, Clow . . ."

"Clow?" Keroberos licked Clow's nose again. "You have a lot of problems . . . Wake up!" The Clow cards had woken him up, and force him down to the corridor to one of the many empty rooms on the sleeping floor. Once in the room, Keroberos had bounded over to Clow, who lay unconscious on the floor. Clow's dark robes were spread around him, his black hair coiled away from him; he was just lying there in the middle of the room. Keroberos started to lick his face, trying to rouse him from whatever meaningful vision he was in. Keroberos frankly didn't care about the visions, and felt they were a terrible burden on Clow. 

Clow frowned, and then opened his eyes; he was out of his vision. Keroberos' large fuzzy features filled his vision, and Keroberos was smiling broadly. "Gah!" Clow gasped. 

"Nani?" Keroberos frowned as he let Clow get up, he walked around the human, and pushed against his back, "What kind of greeting is that?"

"I'm sorry . . . you just . . ." Clow turned and started to stare at the space beside him. Had it been his room, Keroberos reflected, it would be where his bed would be.

"Huh! And I came to save you as well!" Keroberos took a swipe at Clow's head, "You could at least be grateful!"

Clow ducked, "I am . . . I just . . ." Clow broke off again and stared at the space again.

"What is it?"

"It's late . . . you should be sleeping."

"So should you . . . but no, you're here keeping the cards and me awake!"

"Go to bed . . ." Clow murmured, he stood and petted Keroberos; "I have something to attend to in my study."

Clow nodded as Keroberos padded into his room. Sighing, he proceeded down the stairs to his study. The tiny boy made Clow smile, but still he had no idea who the child was. "Yue . . . the Chinese word for moon." Clow smiled, as he remembered the child's voice as he called his creator 'Papa'. That was something Keroberos and Hei-ying have never done, they had never called him father. Clow knew that despite this cute name, the angel would one day stop calling him that, calling Clow by his given name. //Perhaps . . . one day . . . he will be the angel I am destined to love . . .// 

Clow stopped and leaned back on his door. He smiled warmly again; it would be nice if the child could be here now . . . Clow had the feeling that he was getting these future . . . glimpses? Echoes of events not yet happened? Because Clow was now growing even more powerful as his magic matured, he was able to see more of what was to come. 

"Clow? . . . Clow Reed? . . . Where are you?" Clow looked up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice, it was soft, hesitant ". . . Clow Reed?" 

It was calling him, but the corridor was empty, "Who's there . . .?"

A different, a familiar voice called to him, "Clow . . . come in . . . We're waiting for you . . ."

"Eriol?!" Clow pushed off the door, and spun to look at the door, an unearthly glow was emanating from under it. "Eriol? Is that . . .?"

"Yes . . . please . . . come in."

Clow pushed the door open and stumbled through. There on his floor; his magic circle glowed brightly, he was drawn towards it.  The unfamiliar voice spoke again, "Clow . . . are you here now?"

Clow turned in a slow circle before he answered, "Yes . . ." he murmured wishing he could tell where the voice was coming from.

The magic circle rippled, and caught his attention again, but this time the middle was like the surface of water. Clow walked closer and knelt by the circle of magic. "Who's there?"

Eriol stared back, "Konbanwa . . . how are you?"

"I am . . . fine . . . I wasn't expecting to see you so soon . . ."

"Time is relative . . ." Eriol's voice echoed slightly, but was echoing in the wrong direction, instead of the last sound of the words being repeated, the first sound was. It almost sounded like he was talking backwards. "The times we have met have not been in the same order as they have occurred to you . . ."

"Why can I talk to you now?"

"You have become much more powerful since we last talked . . . you think so as well." 

"How do you know . . .?"

Eriol smiled simply, "I just do . . ." he turned and beckoned to people out of sight. Before they appeared he murmured, "You know the rules right?"

"I can't ask the Cardcaptor what her name is, can I?"

"Not only that but you must act as if you do know it." Eriol winked, "It will become much clearer soon." 

"Hello Clow-sama . . ." the Cardcaptor leant over the water, she looked nervous about something.

"Hello again." Clow smiled warmly, he looked around the gathered group's faces, taking in every detail he could see of them, but still he was denied their eyes, aside from Keroberos all of their eyes remained hidden behind impossible shadows. ". . . To all of you."

The butterfly girl leaned closer to the water, "Are you really Clow Reed?"

"Hmmm-mmm," Clow nodded.

"Really?"

Eriol laughed slightly, as the midnight blue panther turned to her, "Of course, really."

Keroberos leaned over the water, "Hello Clow! How am I?"

Clow positioned himself so he lay on the floor, he chuckled, "You're brilliant!" 

"I'm so handsome in my true form, aren't I?"

Clow sniggered, "Yes, you are."

Something sobered in Keroberos as he smiled, he glanced at Eriol. "Now?"

Eriol smiled and started to nod, "Yes, Keroberos . . . now." 

The group shuffled back as someone behind them moved forward. The white haired angel, the grown-up that was once the curious little boy, Yue leant over the water. His fringe hid his eyes; he glanced first at Keroberos, who nudged him, then at Eriol who smiled confidently. He took a deep breath and leaned closer to the water. "Hello Yue." Clow murmured.

Yue gasped, "How did you . . .?"

"I guessed." Clow answered simply, his heart was beating a thousand miles a minute. It was time.

Yue looked up at Keroberos, who put a paw on his shoulder and smiled. Clow smiled too, it was nice to see that Keroberos would be so comfortable with this new being. Yue looked back, and it was Clow's turn to gasp. The impossible shadows had finally deserted his face, and now Clow could see his beautiful amethyst eyes. 

He didn't need to ask, but he did. "When will you come into my life . . .?"

Yue seemed unable to answer, knowing that his response would result in his creation. He lifted a trembling hand to the water and traced Clow's face just above the surface. His lips moving but making no sound, he was nearly overwhelmed, Clow realised, not by the prospect of his creation but by the fact he was seeing Clow again . . . //How far in the future are you . . .?// Clow wondered.

Keroberos patted Yue on the shoulder, "You don't have to say anything . . . you don't have to spend the rest of eternity with me or—"

"Keroberos!" Eriol lifted a finger to his lips, "Shh!" He looked at Yue, "It's time . . ."

Yue nodded, he seemed to be a little breathless now, "Whenever . . ." he murmured then paused, his eyes betrayed a sadness, "Whenever you decide it . . ."

Clow nodded, "I know . . ."  

"Clow . . . I . . ." Yue begun but was stopped by Eriol, "Please . . . I . . ." Eriol shook his head silently, and raised his hand to strike the water. "Demo . . . no, please let me--!"

Just as Eriol's hand struck the water, Clow raised his hand. Instead of disappearing the image remained, the water on the other side rippling, Eriol didn't look as surprised as everyone, but he did look slightly annoyed Clow had stopped him. Clow held his hand over the water as he raised himself to sit on his heels; he leant over the water to stare at the white haired angel. He pressed his finger against his lips much like Eriol had done. "I will see you soon, Yue . . . you can tell me then . . ."

Yue swallowed, and nodded. "Sayonara." He murmured.

"Iie. . ." Clow murmured, "Ja ne. . . because I will see you later." Clow raise his hand off the image and nodded at Eriol. The blue haired boy smiled, and once again raised his hand to strike the water. Just before the water rippled and the magic circle faded, Clow saw the angel squeeze his eyes shut, not willing to see Clow disappear from his life again.

Hei-ying awoke.

The storm card was raging again; Master Clow must have been using it to water his plants again. He would have rolled over and fallen back asleep, if he hadn't felt a pang of déjà vu, it was strange and he sat up trying to figure out what he had felt. The thunder sounded roughly, and Hei-ying suddenly remembered, it was the first time that he had experienced a storm he was remembering. 

It had been a frightening incident at first. He didn't know what was wrong, or why the outside was making such a horrendous noise; so he had tried at first to ignore it know that if there was something really wrong then Master Clow would come for him. But when there was no sign of Master Clow, and the storm, in his opinion, was getting worse. He had picked up a little candle and ran all the way down the corridor to Master Clow's bedroom. 

Hei-ying pulled a pillow into his embrace; it had been the first time Master Clow had looked at him in the way Hei-ying wished Master Clow would always look at him. Hei-ying had been too young to appreciate that brief moment when Master Clow had become unfocused for a few seconds and had stared at him with hungry eyes. It made him feel warm just thinking about it. That evening when he felt Master Clow checking on him, he felt that perhaps that tonight Master Clow would come back to Hei-ying, that things would return to the way they were. Quiet, orderly, Master Clow and Hei-ying had been happy together, and then Keroberos had come along and disturbed that balance. 

Hei-ying sighed, if only Master Clow didn't insist on training Keroberos, Hei-ying could have done away with the troublesome lion, and then they could have resumed their life together. Hei-ying sat up, perhaps now that Keroberos was grown . . . perhaps, now would be a good time to approach Master Clow.      

A knock at his door, made him look up from his book. "Come."

Hei-ying entered, carrying a small lamplight. Clow looked out of the window, it was raining heavily. He smiled, his Storm card was doing it's job wonderfully. The winter had turned unexpectedly dry, and his magical azaleas were dying. Clow turned his attention back to Hei-ying, "Don't tell me that you're afraid of a little storm." He teased.

A smile pulled at Hei-ying's lips, "If I was, would you comfort me?"

Clow chuckled lightly, and closed his book, folding his pen into the pages. "Of course."

Hei-ying blew out his lamp, and briefly became one with the shadows. Clow's only indication as to his location was the sound of Hei-ying's soft footsteps upon the hard wood floor. "How would you comfort me?" Hei-ying's voice floated out of the darkness.  

Clow was slightly concerned about the disconcerting undertone of Hei-ying's voice but he continued in a teasing tone, "I would let you sleep in my bed with me, as I would allow Keroberos."

Hei-ying paused just outside of the glowing boundary cast by his desk's lamp, he stared at Clow. A pale hand stole out of the dark shadows, and snuck up to the flame. Hei-ying fingers played with the flame, slipping through it, above it. "If I . . . was scared, filled with more fear than Keroberos . . ." Hei-ying leant into the light, drawing his face closer to the light, his pale features framed by his black hair. He glanced at Clow briefly, before tilting closer towards the flame. The flame leant towards his pale lips as he breathed in. Deep jade eyes slid shut as he blew the flame out slowly. Once again the shadows engulfed Hei-ying, and obscured him from Clow's sight. "Would you comfort me more?"

Clow turned serious, "Hei-ying, what do you want?"

A breeze flickered against the last remaining light. Clow knew this meant Hei-ying had used his powers of levitation, and so, Clow no longer was absolutely sure where the black haired youth was anymore. His creation sudden stepped into the light, standing no further than two feet from Clow's bed. "I want you." 

"I thought you understood," Clow began sadly, "You and I are creation and Master now . . . nothing more."

"You don't mean that . . ." Hei-ying knelt by Clow's bed and gazed at him in his ever-loving way.

Clow sighed again, "Hei-ying . . ." his eyes slid shut, as he wondered how to phrase his words, "Hei-ying, I hoped that you would have grown out of this fascination . . . this obsession of yours . . ."

"I love you . . ." Hei-ying whispered.

"Hei-ying, no . . . You love me as a creation would his creator, as a pet would love his Master."

Hei-ying pushed himself up, and leant towards Clow, "No! No, no, no!" He spoke softly, as if speaking some great revelation, "I love you. You, the Master Clow Reed." He pulled Clow's hand closer, "I love you . . . I love you and no one else." He murmured as he bestowed butterfly kisses on his Master's soft hand. 

Clow slowly pulled his hand away from Hei-ying, "As a pet would love his Master," he repeated.

Hei-ying grew bolder and sat gently on the bed, "I love you, Master Clow Reed." 

Clow didn't have the courage to meet the jade green eyes; "I have done you a great wrong, Hei-ying . . ." 

"You can do no wrong . . ." Hei-ying smiled, Clow glanced at him, the dark haired being was truly unaware of what Clow was trying to explain. 

"I can, and I have, Hei-ying." Clow murmured sadly, "I wanted you to obedient to me, and me alone . . . but I never wanted you to be a slave to me . . . I wanted a . . . companion."

"I am your companion," Hei-ying persisted, "and now I wish to be your lover as well, forever . . ." he ducked his head, as he began to kiss Clow's hand again. "Keroberos is now fully grown . . . we can be together again . . ."

A soft gurgle beside Clow made Hei-ying raise his head. There, beside Clow, lay a tiny bundle. Hei-ying stared at the tiny pile of blankets as it squirmed slightly. Hei-ying could feel a tiny surge of magic emanating from it. He looked at Clow, who had his eyes closed. 

"Hei-ying," Clow began. "I am your Master, nothing else . . ." Hei-ying felt another pang of déjà vu, one summer night Clow had called him into the room, and there was a small, wrapped up kitten lying in the mass of blankets. This kitten turned out to be Keroberos. 

"You have created another guardian?" Hei-ying looked questioningly at Clow. Clow nodded as Hei-ying leant over to pick the newest addition to their family up. He wondered briefly if it was the panther that Clow had been doodling a lot recently. Another version of Keroberos, only midnight blue, with Clow's favourite: large white wings and a long tail with a curl at the end. Keroberos wouldn't be pleased, but it would keep the troublesome lion away from Clow. Hei-ying got excited as he started to unravel the blankets from the squirming mass. If the new panther could distract Keroberos, then Hei-ying could keep Clow's attention to himself.

Tiny white wings obscured the little thing from Hei-ying's sight, "Hei-ying . . ." Clow put his hand over his, Hei-ying, "Understand me now, you are nothing but my creation for now, a valued companion to me but nothing more . . ." Hei-ying frowned slightly, and pulled his hand from Clow's, he gently pulled the wing away from the hidden being, Clow continued in a whispered tone, ". . .Just like Keroberos . . ." the first aspect that was revealed to Hei-ying was the new being had white hair, a lot of white hair, he gently pushed each lock away, "And now . . ." Clow gazed at Hei-ying's profile as he discovered his new brother, ". . .Just like . . . Yue."

Hei-ying's face was blank as he gazed at the human features of the baby; it's fine white eyebrows, it's clear jaw line and tiny sharp nose. The child looked almost like Hei-ying, but where Hei-ying had black hair, Yue had white. He slowly looked at Clow, who smiled sadly. "Meet your brother . . . Yue . . . he will be the Judgement maker. I decided that it was unfair that you two be both the Judgement Maker . . ." Clow explained softly.

"You're replacing me." Hei-ying's tone dropped to a betrayed level. Something inside of him broke, staring down at this child, his new brother, it hurt to look upon the tiny features of the fair angel. The child was beautiful, it looked similar to him, and it had all of Clow's favourite features. Long hair, white wings, like Clow had given Hei-ying, traits that were repeated in Hei-ying, repeated through the Cards. This child had them all. Hei-ying felt . . . out of place, unneeded. Old. He knew Clow, Clow became easily bored with things, mostly with the cards, he wasn't happy with one card, so he created another and another, until he ran out of ideas. 

He had become bored with the idea of having Hei-ying as the guardian of the seal, the adviser and the judgement maker, which was why Keroberos had come into existence. Hei-ying didn't mind the giant winged house cat that much; Clow would never love him as he did Hei-ying. But this angel . . . this angel, so pure, white and true. Perhaps Clow had become bored of Hei-ying, and had created this child for his amusement.

"I thought . . ." Clow murmured as he brushed a lock of hair behind Hei-ying's ear, "I thought that you might be feeling lonely . . ."

"Lonely?" Hei-ying repeated.

"I spend so much time with Keroberos, that I thought that you would like to have someone just like you . . ." 

"You created him to amuse . . . me?" 

"I thought it would be nice," Clow murmured, he had been worried that Hei-ying wouldn't take kindly to Yue, he seemed upset when Keroberos had been created. "To have someone more like you, not like Keroberos, you two could play together, you could teach him things, and he will always listen . . . not like Keroberos."

Hei-ying licked his dry lips, as several possibilities spun in his mind, //If my Master had created this child to amuse me . . .//

Hei-ying stood, and cradled Yue in his arms, he cooed quietly as the child stirred. He stood by the window, and glanced out. The storm's rains beat heavily against the glass, and lightning flashed. Hei-ying saw himself, briefly, reflected in the glass. 

In that fleeting moment, Hei-ying made a lasting decision. //If my Master had created this child to amuse me . . .//

 He turned back to Clow, and laid the moonchild in his arms. He silently lit his lamp again, and paused in the doorway. He inclined his head for permission to leave. Clow looked at Yue, then at Hei-ying, silently asking a question.

For a moment Hei-ying's face was blank, before it broke in to a wide smile. Clow smiled back, taking Hei-ying's expression to mean that he was happy with his new brother.

Hei-ying slipped out the door, and into the silent corridor. He glided, not quite walking, not quite flying. His mind repeating the same thought over and over, //If my Master had created this child to amuse me . . . If my Master had created this child to amuse me . . .If my Master had created this child to amuse me . . .// somehow he ended up in his room, the something that had broken began to hurt. He spoke aloud, as he increasingly found he did that.

"If Clow created this child to amuse me . . . then it would amuse me if the child ceased his existence."

-------------------

And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!

Yue: FINALLY!!! WE GET TO MEEEEEEEE!!!!!

DrM: [rubs hands together] And now we start with the torture!

Hei-ying: Yay!!!!

Kero and Yue: Booo!!

Clow: [cooing over baby-Yue] Awwww!!

Kero: You don't notice anything in this fic, do you?!

Clow: What?

Kero: [points at Hei-ying] Evil psychotic homicidal maniac . . . wants other guardians dead . . . killed you best friend . . . EVIL PSYCHOTIC HOMICIDAL MANIAC!!!

Hei-ying: No, I'm not . . . I'm evil, psychotic, homicidal, a maniac AND obsessed with Clow. Thank you very much!

DrM: [suddenly sneezes] Hmmm . . . could someone be talking about me?

Clow: I wouldn't notice anyway [starts with the baby talk to baby-Yue] 'cause someone's a widdle bwunble of joy! Yes you are!

Yue: [mouth falls open with horror, then slowly turns to the readers] Quick! R&R!! For the love of sanity please R&R!!!

Baby-Yue: Oh yeah, love, sanity, survival of mankind, the earth, the universe, yadda, yadda, yadda . . . please R&R!!!

[Note: I will change all the chapters so they all look like this one, but that will have to wait for a while!]


	14. Innocence

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me! Nor do I own the lyrics to 'Dreaming' CCS's second opening song, I just love it so much and it makes me feel so happy!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Thirteen: Innocence

Keroberos was the last up. He knew because he could feel Hei-ying and Clow downstairs, he rolled over and snuggled back down. Clow was probably training Hei-ying in his study, and any minute now, Hei-ying would get annoyed enough to rush upstairs and demand that he get up immediately and stop making the Master wait for his lazy—

Keroberos' eyes snapped open, there was something else in the house, some new presence he had never felt before. He rolled out of bed and bounded out of the room, whatever it was it was . . . Keroberos wrinkled his nose as he reached out to touch the aura of this presence again; it was cool, but warm with Clow's magic. It had been created recently, Keroberos noticed then skidded as he turned. He leapt into the air and unfurled his wings to carry him down the stairs quickly, //What is it?// he thought excitedly, //What? What? What?!//

//Come into my study and you will find out!// Clow laughed in his mind. Keroberos blushed slightly as he realised his excited thoughts might have been picked up by Clow and Hei-ying. He made his wings disappear as he landed at the third floor corridor. He ran down the corridor to Clow's study. Hei-ying opened the door, and glared at him, "You will slow down and compose yourself before you enter this room!" He spat.

Keroberos barrelled past him, and ignore the angry star guardian. "What is it?! What have you made?!" Keroberos cried excitedly, he felt like a kitten again, like when he had gone outside and saw that the leaves were turning a different colour. "What?! What?! What?!" He virtually pranced up and down as Clow climbed out of his window seat; he had a small bundle of blankets in his arms.

"Keroberos, Hei-ying's a little right, you'll have to calm down first . . ." Clow said as he tickled whatever was in the bundle. Keroberos stopped prancing, and looked at Hei-ying over his shoulder, normally he would have gotten a look of superiority but this time was different, Hei-ying was angry at something, but he was hiding it from Clow. His eyes narrowed briefly at Keroberos before he looked up at Clow, "May I return to my room to study please. . .?" He glared at the bundle again; "I require more preparation at sealing the Firey."

Clow looked up, Hei-ying was uncomfortable with the new addition to their family. He sighed, "All right."

Hei-ying nodded once, and silently left the room. Once the door had snapped shut, Keroberos turned to look at the small bundle in Clow's arms, whatever it was, it had the power to banish Hei-ying from a room . . .

Clow sighed, Hei-ying wasn't as happy with his new brother as he had hoped; he wondered what Keroberos' reaction would be. Clow knew that in the future Keroberos and Yue would be very close, but would they go through a time of sibling rivalry as Keroberos and Hei-ying were? 

He turned and sat back down in the window seat, Clow looked up at Keroberos who was staring at the small white bundle. "What is it?" Keroberos asked in an awed voice.

"What would you say. . .?" Clow started, then change his mind, "How would you like. . .?" 

"What is it?" Keroberos repeated as he hopped onto the seat. 

"You remember last night how I couldn't stop saying Yue?"

"Mmm-hmm. . ." Keroberos still stared at the bundle; maybe it was that blue cat thing Clow had been drawing, maybe that was why Hei-ying was so angry because the cat thing would probably turn out just like Keroberos. He grinned, "Is it another guardian?"

Clow looked slightly relieved, and nodded, "Yes."

"Can I . . ." Keroberos suddenly felt very happy, "Can I see it?"

Clow nodded, "Of course you can. . ."

Within a day, Yue's wings had ceased being a protective cocoon, within a week, much to Clow's relief; Yue had begun to make noises as if he was going to wake. They had discovered that Yue's development was for some reason much slower than that of Hei-ying and Keroberos. Clow thought it might have been because Yue was a little more complicated than the other two, as he had done with Keroberos, Clow had created Yue with a lot more emotions than Hei-ying, but he had also given Yue Hei-ying's emotional restraint. He hadn't give Yue the obedience he had cast over Hei-ying, knowing that that was the problem with Hei-ying. Clow wanted him to be able to speak against Clow, but he didn't want another version of Keroberos to irk Hei-ying. Yue was adorable, Clow stopped both Hei-ying and Keroberos' training sessions so the pair could get used to their new brother. Keroberos had already started to show traits Clow had seen in the older version of his sun guardian. 

However one afternoon, while Keroberos and Hei-ying were out practising their flying, and Yue was fast asleep still, lying on the window seat, Clow sat at his desk making some notes on Yue. The thought occurred to him so suddenly; he didn't even know what had sparked it in the first place.

//Where was the other angel?// 

Clow looked up from his writing, it had taken him nearly eleven years, but he had just realised that there was only one angel when he had had his vision about telling Keroberos and the weeping angel about his imminent death. Clow stood and silently walked over to the window seat, Hei-ying and Keroberos were just outside, arguing loudly again, and Yue was squirming in his sleep. //Hei-ying. . . or Yue. . .// one of them wasn't going to be in the mansion when he died, one of them would leave or just not be there when he announced his death. Clow suddenly felt a little bewildered, what did this mean? Would Hei-ying or Yue be leaving him? Why? What would make them want to leave his side? 

This troubled him so much that he forgot completely about the book he was making for the future generations of the Li family, telling them about the final judgement maker, Yue. Clow sat down by Yue, and picked the baby up, he cradled the tiny moonchild to his chest, the child looked so content here in his arms, why would he want to leave?

A shout from out side drew his attention, Hei-ying was telling Keroberos off for his sloppy loops. Why would Hei-ying want to leave either?

Clow pondered this very deeply as the night drew closer. 

The early winter turned into a snowy one, Clow could tell that the winter's snow would last a lot longer this year. "How do you know?" Keroberos paused long enough from his lunch to look up at Clow. 

He pulled his sleeves up again and scooped some more food onto the tiny spoon, "I just can tell," Clow answered simply, Yue gurgled as he held his small fists in the air. Three weeks had past, and still Yue looked like a toddler. But Clow didn't mind, in fact he welcomed the change in lifestyle, Keroberos too enjoyed it, as he sat up for hours with the baby singing songs he had purposely learnt from the song card. 

Clow had been passing one night, a few days before Yue woke, when he heard, "Alright little moonbeam . . . I shall sing you one more song with my awesome voice and then I will have to leave . . . but I make this one more song with your solemn promise that tomorrow you wake up and you let your brand new, and bestest, Oniichan see what colour your eyes are . . . ni? Okay . . ." Clow smiled as he imagined the scene, Keroberos was probably standing on his back legs, propping his forepaws on the railing of Yue's crib, the window would be closed at night because Clow didn't want the chance that Yue would wake up one night and, being drawn by the sight of his own symbol, the moon, fly out of the window. Keroberos' deep voice rumbled slightly as he began the song Clow had instructed the song card to teach him. Clow had figured out what the song Keroberos had been singing in his vision and wanted the lion to learn it quickly. "It's all right! Daijobu, daijobu, daijobu! Kiseki datte okoseru! Here we go! " Keroberos cheerfully belted out, and Yue was probably smiling in his deep sleep, "Ikou yo, ikou yo, Ikou yo tsubasa hiroge!!"  

Clow smiled and placed his hand on the wooden door of his new moon guardian; he sighed happily and moved on, still listening to Keroberos' voice.

"Yeah but how?" Keroberos asked, snapping Clow out of his little mental regression to that night.

"The Master has given you his answer," Hei-ying snapped, it used to be rare Hei-ying showed his temper in front of Clow, but since Yue's creation Hei-ying didn't seem to want to control his outburst anymore. Clow never chastened Hei-ying for it . . . in fact he secretly encouraged Hei-ying's bouts of emotion, it meant that Hei-ying could be getting over his restricting obedience spell. 

Yue gurgled again as he swallowed, he had a healthy appetite and a big smile. It was one of the best things about Yue. Keroberos would storm into Clow's room early every morning to ask if he could wake Yue up. Yue had had a positive effect on Keroberos, instead of being the last up; Keroberos was always the first, determined that the first smile of the day was his. Every so often though, Clow would wake even earlier than the lion and carry the sleeping Yue down to his study, just cradling his new creation in his study's window seat. Wishing for one more vision from Eriol, the Cardcaptor and their friends, just so he could show them this wonderful new life. 

Clow smiled as Yue waved his fists at him, "Would you like some more, little moonbeam?"

Yue blinked at him, his waving stopped, his twinkling amethyst eyes focused on Clow and the child was silent for a few seconds. Keroberos stopped eating, and Hei-ying paused in his drinking to look up at Yue. They were all expecting Yue to start talking soon, Christmas was coming.

 It would be Keroberos and Yue's first Christmas, and the first since Marcibay's death that Clow actually planned on celebrating. The excitement Clow displayed made Hei-ying suspicious of the whole event, Keroberos couldn't wait, he like the idea of giving something to Clow and Yue, he wasn't sure about Hei-ying but reasoned that, as Clow had hinted, this may be an excellent time to put old differences aside. Keroberos smiled slightly, well; at least Hei-ying had stopped trying to kill him.

He knew exactly what he was going to give Yue, he'd asked Clow to make them for him because Keroberos couldn't sew, but he was sure it would make Yue very pleased to have them. Clow had been making some special robes for Yue, his judgement robes; they were just like Hei-ying's only in white and blue. Keroberos was very pleased about this since it meant Yue wouldn't look like he was Hei-ying. 

Yue blinked again and burst into a loud giggle. Keroberos smiled, Hei-ying sighed sharply, and Clow chuckled, "Not yet then . . .?"

As the month neared Christmas, Yue grew a little; he went from looking like a one or two year old to a three year old. He could run and fly around the place, and he could ape sounds, but he still couldn't speak. Yue, like Keroberos had done, would follow Clow everywhere. Clow enjoyed this immensely as it also meant Keroberos would spend a lot of time with them. Hei-ying would also always be there, but stayed away in the corner mostly. Clow looked up from his baking one afternoon and saw Hei-ying staring at Yue again; he seemed saddened and angry at the same time. Keroberos was talking Yue though the joy of pudding and how to eat cookies, when Clow suddenly took off his apron. "Hey?! You're not going to stop baking are you?"

Clow smiled down at Yue and Keroberos, "Do me a favour Keroberos?"

"Hai?"   

"Take care of our little moonbeam; Hei-ying and I are going to go for a walk."

Hei-ying looked at him in amazement, "We are?"

"You are?"

"Ohh ahh? Ohh ahh!" Yue started to clap happily. "Ooh ahh!!"

Clow smiled at his moon guardian, and petted his sun guardian on the head, "Yes, we are. . . please make sure our little moonbeam stays here in the house okay?" 

"Uh. . . hai."

The snow crunch quietly under their feet.

"Are you all right?" Clow tighten his long purple scarf against the elements.

"Master?" Hei-ying was walking beside him, having recently losing the desire to be utterly respectful to Clow, in reality, Hei-ying wanted to be close enough to make Clow remember that he was there, when they went walking with Yue.

Clow stopped and grabbed Hei-ying's arm, "Call me Clow."

"Pardon me?"

"I would like you to stop calling me Master, and I would prefer it if you call me Clow."

"Cl-clo-cl . . .I . . . can't." Hei-ying admitted, "It would be wrong of me . . ."

Clow sighed and resumed the walk; "I have done you a great evil, Hei-ying . . ."

"You are the Master Clow Reed . . . you can do no evil on me, I am your koi—I mean your creation."

Clow paused; "You were going to call yourself my lover, weren't you?"

"According to the dictionary, the strict definition of a lover is—"

"I know Hei-ying. . ." Clow held up a hand, "But you shouldn't think that--I mean . . . I shouldn't have done the things I have done to you. . ."

"But I enjoyed it. . ." Hei-ying didn't understand, he didn't know what Clow was saying.

"As did I, but they were very wrong of me. . ." Clow turned away and walked over to the snowmen that he and his creations had created a few days ago, Yue had been spell bound by the snow, and by the strange people (and lion) shaped snow creations, he placed his hand on the sculpture that Hei-ying had made, it was almost a perfect replica of Clow, he sighed and faced Hei-ying ". . .and I should have been able to control myself." 

"But I . . ." Hei-ying stepped forward, wanting to end what Clow was saying. It was beginning to hurt.

Clow pressed a finger against Hei-ying's pale lips, "I want to apologise to you . . . please, forgive me?"

Hei-ying blinked, Master Clow Reed was asking for his forgiveness. He felt the broken thing in his soul twist sharply; Clow regretted their relationship and was now asking for forgiveness from his own creation. Hei-ying looked like he had been stabbed, Clow thought as he watched the internal debate in his creation. 

"Perhaps . . ." Clow put an easing hand on Hei-ying's shoulder, "I did not make myself clear . . . I have not regretted your creation and I love you dearly. You, Yue and Keroberos are the closest family I have ever had. What I regret is using your body in such a horrendous manner." Clow looked sincerely into Hei-ying's jade eyes, "I want you to forgive me in the knowledge that I love you, but that I will never take you in such an terrible manner ever again."

Hei-ying pushed Clow away and stumbled backwards, his Master was asking a mere creation for forgiveness, it was more than Hei-ying could take. He clutched his head and fell to the ground. It hurt, the broken thing in his soul, it burned pain all over. He couldn't understand anything; just that Clow was promising never to touch Hei-ying like that any more. Hei-ying tried to imagine how he was going to survive without Clow. 

Clow fell to his knees and frantically tried to help Hei-ying, the black haired angel was twisting in sheer agony, clutching his head. Clow didn't understand what was so wrong. "Hei-ying? Can you hear me?! Calm down, calm down!" He shook Hei-ying's shoulders, his jade eyes were rolling back in his head, and he was jerking slightly. Clow thought he was going to fall into a coma or something equally terrible. "Hei-ying!!"

"Maa-ou, maa-ou, Maa-ee, maa-ee! Maat-taaay!" Yue sang happily as he and Keroberos walked towards the downstairs study, Clow had officially designated it the playroom, if he wasn't around to carry Yue up the stairs. Clow was incredibly protective of this small child, Keroberos reflected as he watch Yue skipped to the large door. The tiny white haired child put his pale white hands and started to try and push the door open, Keroberos let him growl and watched his little slippered feet move along the ground until Keroberos stood back on his hind legs and push the door open. 

Yue fell and rolled into the room, he still had short hair in comparison to Hei-ying's, Yue's reached the middle of his back, where as Hei-ying's could be coiled around his feet. Yue sat up and threw his plait back over his shoulder, and he looked around. 

The mansion was still new to him, and his memory wasn't very sharp yet, Keroberos laughed slightly as he picked Yue up with his teeth. The lion walked over to the fireplace, which immediately burst into light. Keroberos set Yue down on a warm rug by it and went to fetch the toy box Clow had left down here. He listened to Yue squeal, as he slipped his sharp teeth around the rope rung on the bow, //This sure is heavy// he thought as he pulled it towards the fireplace. 

"Aiiiie!!" Yue screamed in pain, Keroberos turned around. Yue was curled on the floor, and was crying. 

"What? What is it?" Keroberos bounded over. But before Yue could show him what was wrong, the window suddenly opened, and Clow flew through on his staff carrying Hei-ying, "Keroberos!" He ordered, "Fetch me some warm blankets."

"But Master--!" Keroberos looked at Yue who was still twisting on the floor. Clow didn't look up as he lay Hei-ying on a nearby couch, Keroberos could see that Hei-ying looked even paler than before, and that he was twisting unnaturally.

"Go! Quickly," Clow shouted over his shoulder, he was scared; Hei-ying had never done this before. He tried to hold Hei-ying still as he passed a healing hand over his face. When he didn't respond to that, and when Keroberos had returned with a thick blanket, Clow resorted to the only option he had left. He held his hand in front of Hei-ying and his hand glowed slightly as he raised it in a 'stop' gesture to his creation. Hei-ying's face instantly blanked and his twitching ceased immediately. Clow sighed, once Hei-ying regained consciousness he should be able to wake up properly. 

A small cry from behind him caught his attention. Clow turned to see Keroberos pulled Yue up and nudge his head up, Yue was holding one of his hands against his stomach, refusing to allow Keroberos to see it. 

"Keroberos?" Clow stood, "What is wrong with little moonbeam?"

"I don't know; I turned away for a few moments to get the toys and then Yue cried out." He nudged Yue again, "Why don't you let your 'niichan see, huh?"

Clow crouched down by Yue, "What's wrong? Hmmm?" He held his hand out, "Let me see, please?"

Yue looked up at him, his tiny eyes brimming with tears, "Let me see, Onegai?" Yue looked at Keroberos, who nodded, and smiled.

"He can make it all better . . . Will you let him?"

Yue thought about it, but scrambled backwards as Clow put his hand on the healthy one. "Yue please," Clow said, he didn't understand what was wrong with Yue. "Little moonbeam . . ."

"Come on moonbeam! Clow here will make all the hurt go away!" 

As Keroberos went over to try and convince Yue, Clow looked over at Hei-ying, he was still asleep. A thought occurred to Clow and he reached into his pocket. "Glow; create a little diversion for Yue. Release." He murmured.

A tiny speck of light floated past Yue's tiny nose, despite the pain he was in, he stared at it. It was like the snow in the Outside. He raised his healthy hand to try and touch it but it burst and thousand of tiny snow lights surrounded him.

Keroberos padded over to Clow, "He's burnt his hand," he whispered.

Clow nodded, and crawled up behind Yue. The tiny boy had his back to him and was watching the glowing display. "Little moonbeam . . ." Yue swivelled slightly to look at Clow, who could see Yue quickly move his good hand over the burnt one. Yue wasn't going to let Clow care for him. Clow sighed, and raised his hand as he had done towards Hei-ying. "I'm sorry moonbeam but I do need to treat that." And with that he raised his hand in the same gesture. Yue's tear-filled eyes crossed slightly as he fell back unconscious.

"What have you done?!" Keroberos cried out in concern. 

"He won't let me treat him if he's awake." Clow murmured as he picked Yue's frail body up, the burn was quite awful, "What happened?"

"I went to get the toys and then he just cried out . . . I'm so sorry, Master . . ." Clow turned, Keroberos had never referred to him as 'Master', the lion was staring at the floor. Disappointment marring his features, he glanced at the fireplace, "I'm not a very good Oniichan . . . I didn't pay enough attention." 

Clow smiled, "It's all right, now he knows that if he puts his hand near fire, it will hurt and he won't do it again . . . but still, you will try to protect him a bit more, won't you Keroberos?" 

Keroberos stood, "Of course!" He said immediately.

"Good," Clow smiled and sat on the floor next to Hei-ying, he hummed slightly as he ran his hand over Yue's, the burnt crust disappearing in favour of Yue's usual pale skin. 

"What happened to him?" Keroberos nodded towards Hei-ying.

Clow looked up and at his star guardian, "I don't know. . ."

"What did you say to him?"

"How do you know if it was something I said?"

"Hei-ying does this a lot. . . only after he's left your presence, he sorta clutches his head and lies there until he's figured out what you mean. . ." Keroberos said simply, and then snorted in half amusement, "You must have said something phenomenally confusing to make him do it in front of you . . ."

Clow's eyes widened, "He does? This is the first I have ever heard about it. . ."

Keroberos eyed him strangely again; "There are so many things that I assume you know . . . and yet . . . you truly don't do you?"

"What do you mean?" Clow asked but Keroberos gave no answer as a groan from behind them made them look up. Hei-ying was sitting up; Clow's words still didn't make much sense to him. He really didn't understand what Clow had said, he had enjoyed their activities and yet . . . he regretted them . . . Hei-ying wondered what could have caused this sudden shift in Clow's ways. //Shift . . .?// Hei-ying thought as his bewildered mind latched on to the only thought that made any sense to him at that precise moment. //There was a shift when Keroberos was created . . . Clow became less orderly . . . when Yue was created . . . Clow came to me and said . . .// Hei-ying's jade eyes narrowed, //Yue. Yue is the cause of the shift . . . and in the change . . . if I remove Yue . . . then Clow will revert to his old ways . . .// it made sense, Hei-ying knew this, it made complete and utter sense. Yue had made Clow . . . no, was distracting Clow from his love for Hei-ying. 

Clow watched Hei-ying quietly, his jade eyes were darting from left to right rapidly, and Clow knew this was Hei-ying's mind at work. He smiled, Hei-ying was processing their conversation and soon he would understand what he meant. //Good.// Clow thought and turned his attention back to Yue.

Keroberos, on the other hand, was a little less pleased to see that Hei-ying was awake. The star guardian was thinking, processing, planning. His whole mind was focused on whatever idea his brain had fixated onto. Keroberos was wary of this, it was true that Hei-ying would often make himself pass out just so his entire being could completely focus on what he was thinking, and Keroberos hated it. The first time he had seen it was when he was a lot younger, they had just left a lesson with Clow, and they were mounting the stairs. At first he thought Hei-ying had been capable of seeing the visions that Clow saw. But once Hei-ying would reawaken, he would nod and say; "Now it makes sense . . ."

Hei-ying glanced up, and stared at Keroberos. Their eyes locked, Hei-ying's face looked deathly pale and his jade eyes were unblinking. Keroberos curled his lip in a way that showed Hei-ying he didn't approve of what he was thinking, but Hei-ying smirked. The lion wasn't the problem anymore . . . the little moonbeam was.  He looked at Clow, who was cradling Yue to his chest. The tiny boy was fast asleep, his small thumb firmly set in his mouth. His innocence didn't fool Hei-ying, and very soon it wouldn't fool Clow anymore either.

Christmas eve arrived, and the small family prepare the downstairs study ready for Christmas. Clow asked the woody to provide them with a beautiful Christmas tree, and his creations decorated the room. Hei-ying had been a lot more vocal, seeming to take every chance he could, to be close to Yue. Clow was happy Hei-ying wanted to spend more time with his new brother, Keroberos wasn't. He didn't like the way Hei-ying would pick Yue up and spin around the room with the little boy, sometimes Hei-ying would swing the tiny boy's head a little to close to the wall for Keroberos' liking. He didn't like the way Hei-ying would get to Yue first at night and would sing to the tiny moonchild. His lullaby was a centuries old one, and Keroberos hated it, who would ever think about singing their child to sleep with a song that implied that they were going to fall out of a tree and once they hit the ground, their crib would break. 

Hei-ying had also taken to cutting Yue's hair, while this was perfectly fine with Yue, as he appeared to love Clow's hair and would often want his hair in the same way, Keroberos didn't like it. Hei-ying would sit Yue down and methodically cut Yue's hair with a large pair of scissors. They were pure silver, and were very sharp. Clow had created them for Hei-ying when he complained that the scissors he was using weren't sharp enough to cut through Yue's silky thick locks. Keroberos would never leave the room when Hei-ying was cutting Yue's hair, he'd sit nearby and watch every snip Hei-ying made. 

Hei-ying didn't mind this, because he was going to wait until he could think of a way to kill Yue quickly and cleanly, he was cutting Yue's hair to keep him from looking anything like Hei-ying. By doing this, Hei-ying thought he was delaying Clow from realising that Yue was just like Hei-ying in every respect except for his hair, and his eyes. Hei-ying hated Yue's eyes, they were just like Hei-ying's except where there was jade there was amethyst. This was repeated through the clothes they wore as well, Yue's ceremonial robes (which he refused to wear, another disgusting trait in Hei-ying's opinion) were just like Hei-ying's but again where there was black there was white, jade there was blues and purples, only the gold and the black buttons remained the same. 

Keroberos pulled a large red length of clothe out of the box, "What's this for?"

Clow paused to see what Keroberos meant, "Oh, that's to hang on the doorways, please put that over there." Keroberos nodded, as Hei-ying entered the room, with Yue. The tiny boy had grown a little bit more, but still not a single word had issued from his mouth. Clow longed to hear what his little moonbeam really sounded like, instead of the sounds he aped. It would have been so nice, to tell him all about his family, about his life and what his name was. Clow sighed slightly and turned back to the tree, it was almost finished. A small tug at his robes made him turn, Yue stared up at him, and smiled, "Did you just have your hair done?"

Yue smiled even more and nodded, Clow petted him on the head, "It looks beautiful."

Hei-ying's head snapped up, and Keroberos sniggered slightly, "It's not working . . ."

Hei-ying glared at him, "What do you mean?"

"You're trying to make Yue not look like you, that's what all this hair cutting business is about isn't it?"

"I don't know what you mean . . ." Hei-ying pulled another box open, Keroberos' golden eyes narrowed, as he stepped closer.

"Clow might not see it . . . but I do . . ."

"Oh really?" Hei-ying hissed quietly.

"Yes. . ." Keroberos growled softly, neither wanted Clow to hear the conversation. "I know what you are like . . . and I think you should know something."

"Oh?"

"I love Yue . . . he is the best thing that has ever come into this house in a long time . . . and I can see it in Clow's eyes, he loves Yue as well . . . "

"What's your point, Keroberos?"

Keroberos glanced at Yue as Clow picked the tiny boy up, so he could put a decoration on the tree, it was a large glass snowflake. "You've tried to kill me before . . . but if you harm Yue . . ." Hei-ying's eyes narrowed, as Keroberos leaned closer, "I'll--"

"You'll what?" Hei-ying smirked, "Hm? Join me little sunbeam? Don't you think it would be nicer if we started to get some of that affection?"

Keroberos glanced briefly at Yue, he was showing Clow something, and Clow was completely focused on his ting moonchild. Clow had been like this since the day Yue had been created, his attention was mostly based on Yue. Keroberos frowned, then glared at Hei-ying. He was not going to do anything to harm Yue; he adored the child, and had given Clow his solemn promise that he would protect him. "I'd rather die first than hurt Yue!"

Hei-ying snorted, "Then . . .What make you think that Master Clow doesn't know . . .?"

"Not this time Hei-ying . . ." Keroberos growled, "you almost fooled me last time . . . but not with Yue . . ." Keroberos stood, and padded away, "Yue loves us, Clow loves Yue, and I love Yue . . . it appears the only one in this equation that doesn't love . . . is you."

Hei-ying's jade eyes narrowed further, and the two brothers growled softly at each other. So Keroberos was on to him, Hei-ying reflected as the lion moved over to the tree and allowed Yue to sit on his broad back, //No matter. . .// he chuckled inanely to himself, //I'll just wait until Yue is alone. . .//

It was snowing lightly, Clow shivered as he closer his curtain, the day had been brilliant, and he'd never seen his guardians get along so well before. //Wonderful.// he thought, the clock chimed softly. "Eh-? Midnight already?" He muttered, as he removed his dressing gown, and climbed into his bed. He picked up his book, the Clow book, and placed his hand over the cover. He had it prepared now for when he would ask his guardians to be sealed in the book, Keroberos would go on the front, Hei-ying on the spine, and Yue was now going to go on the back. Yue's symbol would be a half moon with wings, and would be positioned just under Clow's magic circle. Clow liked to think that by doing this Yue would always think that he was under Clow's protection. He smiled as he stroked the empty space, he loved his guardians so much, it was almost indescribable. 

A knock at his door, made him look up from his book. "Come." He said a little puzzled, he couldn't think why anyone would be awake right now. The door creaked open slowly as a small figure stepped in, "little moonbeam?" Clow asked, "What's wrong?"

Yue blinked, and stared silently at Clow, before stepping purposely forward. He looked utterly focused as he climbed on to the end of the bed and clambered over to Clow. Clow realised Yue wasn't staring at him, he was staring at the book. He raised the book and moved it slightly, Yue followed it's every movement.

"You can feel them, can't you?"

Yue nodded, and pulled the book out of Clow's hands. He sat and held the mystic book in his hands. He stared at it, trying to open it. Clow was about to help him when Yue began to speak, "O, book of Clow . . . I, Yue the judge, ask for entry . . ."

The lock snapped opened. Yue jumped slightly as the lock sparked slightly, he slid off the bed and opened the book. He cocked his head as he looked at the face down cards. He hesitantly picked on up and squinted at it, he began to pace away as he read the card's name.

"Win. . ."

Clow blinked as he saw the Cardcaptor standing next to Yue, she was dressed in some sort of uniform, and was holding the book and a card in the same way as Yue was, her lips moving silently a few seconds after Yue spoke.

"Win. . . ddd. . .whin—wind. . ." Yue frowned slightly, he wasn't quite sure of the pronunciation of the strange word.

Clow was amazed as an ice blue magic circle began to draw it's self under Yue's feet, and was overlapped by the gold one that the Cardcaptor was walking on. A slight breeze began to form around the two.

"Win . . .dy. . ." Yue nodded, "Windy!"

The Cardcaptor faded as the wind spirit ascended from the card, she pick Yue up and floated him gently back to the bed. Clow blinked, as he shook off the feeling he had just seen how the Cardcaptor would release his cards. He made a mental note, //Ensure that the Windy is the top card when I seal the book//

He smiled at the windy, "Thank you!"

She smiled and nodded, "Windy!" Yue repeated, awed by the woman, he hadn't seen many of the cards full forms and amazed by this beautiful pale yellow woman. She nodded and placed a small kiss on his pale forehead, before she returned to her card form. Instead of floating back into the book, she floated in front of Yue. The small boy plucked the card out of the air and looked at it closely. 

"You spoke . . ." Clow murmured 

Yue smiled, "Mmm-hmm" he nodded.

"Since when?"

Yue shrugged, "I don't know . . ." he giggled slightly, "My name's little moonbeam isn't it?"

Clow laughed, "No. . . It's actually Yue . . . which is the Chinese word for . . ."

"That round thing outside," Yue pointed at the window.

"What round thing?"

Yue slid off the bed, "Come look."

Clow followed Yue as the small child opened the curtain; he pressed a small finger against the glass, "That round thing."

Clow crouched down and followed Yue's gaze, he was pointing at the moon, which was in it's full crowning glory. "Yes Yue. . . it's called the moon. . . you are the moon guardian of the Clow."

"Of you?"

Clow laughed again "No. . . of the Clow magic that is in that book. I created that magic and I made you because I'd like you to help your brothers to protect it."

Yue stared at the moon, and then at the snow falling softly outside, "Did you make the outside?"

Clow smiled "No, just you and the magic, and your brothers."

Yue smiled gently, "I know . . ." he glanced at Clow, and smiled, "Thank you." 

-------------------

And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!

Yue: I think I might puck! I was nothing like that when I was a kid!

DrM: Oh, yes you were! You just don't want to admit it!!

Hei-ying: He can talk now?! Crap . . . I have to take him out and take him out soon!

Clow: Oh, that's a lovely idea; take him out to the park, won't you?

Hei-ying: Eh heh, heh, heh . . . of course Clow . . . I'll take him out to the park.

Clow: Brilliant!

Kero: @__@; DrM, why is Clow so stupid?

DrM: Look! I can make funny faces out of the signs I never use on my keyboard! ^__^ And look, when I press this button on my computer, I have a donut holder!!

Yue: Kero . . .?

Kero: . . .Yue.

Yue: Kero . . . you have your answer. [Turns to readers] please R&R. . . just please do it. . . maybe it will ease the insanity. . .


	15. Gifts

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part fourteen: Gifts

"Wake up everyone!! It's Christmas!!"

Clow's eyes snapped open, he was a little groggy but smiled as he heard Keroberos bound down the corridor, he heard the lion run into Yue's room first, "Yue?! Yue! It's Christmas . . . YUE?!" 

//He's here, Keroberos// Clow thought to the lion, wondering why he suddenly sounded so scared that he hadn't found Yue in his crib. Yue frowned in his sleep and huddled closer to Clow, who smiled and wrapped his arms around him a little tighter. Yue smiled and his eyes opened slightly, "Is it Christmas now?"

"Yes. . . and it's your birthday." Clow sat up and swept his long black hair back off his face, he swivelled slightly to look at Yue. The small boy smiled, and stood shakily on the bed, he bounced around to sit in Clow's lap. He was silent for a moment as he stared at his creator, Clow was very . . . pretty. He was as pale as the snow outside, but his hair and eyes were as black as the night's sky. Yue peered closer, and concealed a gasp as he realised he was wrong; Clow's eyes were a deep, deep, blue. He adored them and he adored Clow. Clow was just so . . . pretty. He opened his mouth to tell him this but thought better of it. He traced Clow's jaw absently with a small, pale finger as he asked, "My what?" 

"I decided a long time ago that rather than the day you and your brothers were created, the day you first spoke to me would be your birthday." Clow smiled, as he confessed his reasoning, "It's more memorable and special to me, and it makes me feel like you really do exist . . . so . . ." he kissed Yue's forehead, "Happy birthday." 

Yue was amazed by this event that was occurring in his home, it was a celebration of some kind. Clow had told his brothers that today was not only Christmas but also Yue's birthday. He looked around the room was so different now. Behind him was a large mantle place, from which the various stockings hung, the fire burning brightly.

"Yue?" He turned and found Keroberos sitting there a large red bow tied around his neck. He nudged a small present closer.

"Happy birthday, Yue . . . and merry Christmas."

Yue giggled as he rushed forward and threw his small arms around Keroberos' thick, furry neck, "Arigato!!"

"Heh, heh, heh! You're welcome, now . . . open it." Kero nudged the gift closer again; "It's to go with your ceremonial robes." He added as Yue plopped down on the floor with all the grace a two-year-old human could ever have.

"But I hate them . . ." Yue paused in his tearing, and looked up at his winged brother. Keroberos smiled kindly, "I hope these make you change your mind about them . . ."

Yue thoughtlessly strewn the paper around his tiny body as he rushed to see what magical object Keroberos had given him that would be able to change his mind about his boring pure-white robes.

Under the white tissue paper, lay four pieces of clothing. "They're for your hands and feet; Clow said he'd sew them on for you. " Keroberos sat beside him, "So now you will have warm hands and warm feet always."

"Thank you Oniichan."

Yue slipped one of the silken blue gloves on; on the back was a large blue jewel, surrounded by a braid of gold. 

"Very handsome."

Yue looked up to see his eldest brother looking down on him. Unlike Keroberos, Hei-ying had not put any festive clothes on, and was wearing his typical black robes. They looked exactly like Yue's only were black and green. Hei-ying's large jade stone glinted on his chest, in the warm light. He folded his arms, and Yue noticed that his new gloves and foot straps were just like Hei-ying's only in blue. Yue smiled, he was going to look just like Hei-ying, he decided, Hei-ying always looked so calm and collected just like Papa . . . //Papa?!// Yue leapt to his feet and ran out the room, Keroberos quickly caught up with him.

"Where's the fire?"

"I forgot Papa's present!" Yue yelled as the two spread their wings and flew up to Yue's bedroom. It was a painting Yue had done. It had Yue and Papa, with Keroberos and Hei-ying, and some of his favourite Clow cards in it too! Clow would love it, Yue was sure of it! He tore around his room looking for the sheet of paper, as Keroberos laughed softly, as he chased after the tiny whirlwind. Yue loved the sound of Keroberos' laugh; it reminded him of Papa's warm magic aura. 

Hei-ying was staring out of the window; unaware that Clow was behind him. "The snow's beautiful, isn't it?"

"Yes. . . it is. . ." Hei-ying murmured before he jumped slightly and spun, "Master?! I'm sorry . . . you startled me."

Clow smiled, "You seemed rather deep in thought . . . I apologise . . ."

"No. . ." Hei-ying turned to face the window again, "Never apologise . . . I understand why now."

"You do?" Clow moved to stand beside Hei-ying, perhaps this meant Hei-ying had overcome the binding spell fully now. 

"Yes," Hei-ying nodded, he understood, understood perfectly. Yue was blinding Clow, but his Master couldn't see that, Hei-ying was the only one . . . the only one that understood it completely.

"Then you forgive me?"

Hei-ying was silent for a bit, before he answered; "I cannot . . . it would be wrong of me to assume that I have any sort of power over you, you are the Master Clow Reed . . . every action you make, every word you say is ultimately true and right. . ." Clow's eyes slid shut as Hei-ying recited the obedience spell that Clow had binded to his soul, ". . . I must obey you."

Clow sighed, Hei-ying still had a little way to go then, before he completely revoked Clow's mistake. "I have a gift for you and your brothers;" he placed his hand on Hei-ying's shoulder, "But first we must wait for them—"

"Papa?"

"Clow! Come look at this!" Keroberos ran into the room, Yue perched on his back, like a rider. "Our little moonbeam is an artist!!" Yue was excitedly clutching a sheet of paper; he held it towards Clow as he clambered down Keroberos, "For you, Papa!"

"Really?" Clow looked surprised, he hadn't thought that Yue would give anything to him. His very being was a gift to Clow. 

"Hai!" Yue giggled, as Clow turned the paper the right way up, it was a painting, childishly painted but the loving care that had been put into it, was obvious. Clow could see himself, see Keroberos and Hei-ying and Yue was in there as well. There were some of the full forms of the cards, Yue's favourites. Yue had grown very close to some of the more gentle cards, and his painting depicted them as such. There was the Windy, and the Woody, the Snow and the Glow. Clow smiled, the Glow was going to make this Christmas a very special one for Yue.

 "Such a beautiful picture Yue . . . I'll frame it and it shall be hung on my mantle place." Clow smiled and picked Yue up, "Now I have gifts for all of you . . . please come with me."

Clow carried Yue to his thinking chair and, setting Yue on his knee, sat and waited for Keroberos to join them. He frowned slightly as a shiver of déjà vu passed over his spine; Keroberos and Hei-ying were before him . . . there was something so familiar about their postures . . . 

"Master?!" A voice said in surprise and disbelief. "What do you mean?!"

"This is a joke right?!" Yelled Keroberos, furious and shocked "You're kidding."

Clow opened his eyes, before him was Keroberos and either Hei-ying, or the grown up Yue. Clow still couldn't tell as the vision revisited him, but he wished he knew, when he felt his heart twist in agony when the being looked up at him, hurt and betrayal making him look away almost as quickly. He didn't understand why he felt himself force a smile on his face and say, "This is no joke. Today I shall leave this life."

Keroberos cast a glance at the angel, who moved away to stare out the window, Clow realised that Keroberos was looking at the angel with brotherly concern. "Today? This minute? Tonight? Or perhaps a quick cup of tea, maybe a bit of crumpet then you'll just pop your clogs?!" Keroberos growled at him, Clow could tell he was angry not for himself, but for the harm Clow was causing to the beautiful angel. "That's what you've always been, Clow, damned stubborn!" The golden lion looked at the angel, "what about . . .?"

The angel glared at Keroberos over his shoulder, silently warning him not to continue. Keroberos cast one angrier look at Clow before stalking out of the room, evidently beyond expressing his fury civilly. Clow looked at the angel, he desperately wish he could ask the questions that were burning in his mind, //Hei-ying or Yue? If Hei-ying, then why were you trying to escape . . . if Yue, who were you going to attack . . .? // Clow didn't understand the sudden need to know, he just wanted to know which of the two angels he was breaking the heart of.

The angel bit a perfectly full lip, and looked at him tearfully, "You're going to leave us . . . leave me?" He stepped hesitantly closer, "Why? Master, why are you leaving me?" 

Clow wanted to leapt out of his chair and sooth the angel, do anything for him, just to see him happy again, but again his body betrayed him. "I am tired of this life," he explained calmly, "I *need* to go." 

The angel looked down at the floor as he tried to absorb this fact. "Why? Why would you want to . . . unless . . . Are we the—?"

"No." Clow answered simply. "You're not the reason . . . Neither of you have ever brought a single moment of unhappiness to my life."

The angel instantly looked up, he fought a short battle with himself, and chose to fall to his knees by Clow's chair. He picked up Clow's hand and started to press it against his face. Clow leaned towards him, the smell of fresh snow and lavender emanated from the angel, he ran his fingers into the silken hair, it's colour still a mystery. "Then why?" The angel sobbed finally.

Clow murmured his response, "Because I am sick of knowing everything that has happened, that is happening, that will happen." 

"But I love you!" The angel cried then flinched as if he had committed some terrible sin. He looked down in shame; Clow slid his fingers under the angel's chin and pulled it up gently. 

"I knew this as well;" he gently ran his fingers over the angel's lips, wishing he could kiss the ice-cold pale lips. He laughed cynically, "But I also know that one day you will fall in love with another, and he will be more than I ever could be to you . . ." 

"No-one . . ." the angel pressed his head against Clow's knee, not willing to hear Clow's words. "Never . . . nobody . . . I'll do anything, just please don't leave me . . ." Clow raised his hand, and placed it softly on the angel's head, he could feel the angel's name rising to his own lips.

"There's nothing you can do, for it has already been decided . . ." //here it comes,// Clow thought, he concentrated hard so not to lose the name once it had been spoken. "My beloved -----"

"Papa?"

"Shut him up!" 

"He can't help it Hei-ying, Yue. . . there's nothing to worry about, Clow's just having a vision. . . he'll wake up when it's finished. . ."

"Papa!"

"I said shut him up!" Hei-ying raised his hand slightly as if he was about to strike Yue.

Keroberos growled at him deeply, "Hei-ying, do not take this tone!" 

Clow groaned, as he tried to return consciousness. Hei-ying and Keroberos turned to look at Clow, Yue was standing by the arm of the deep red chair, he was confused by Clow's sudden black out, but even more so about his brothers apparent hatred of each other, they knew what this strange thing was, what it was that made Papa fall asleep but Hei-ying didn't seem to want to explain, and when Keroberos tried, Hei-ying told him to shut up. Yue didn't understand them sometimes, Keroberos was always nice when Papa and he were around but sometimes when Clow wasn't, Hei-ying and Keroberos would snip at each other, throwing insults and threats at each other. Yue looked at Clow, even with his dark eyes closed, he looked . . . Yue smiled, as he tried to come up with a word to describe his creator, he looked . . . like the real Yue. The moon, he looked nice but distant, powerful but kind. Yue loved him, he loved Clow a lot, he had decided this fact a long time ago. There was only one question in his mind, would he be able to tell Clow this fact sometime? 

Clow's eyes felt so heavy; it had never been like this before. His vision's never made him feel so out of it before. He groaned, and realised that the vision had been a simple repeat of one he had already seen. That had never happened before. He wondered if the fact the vision had come because he had called it. He let his head roll back, yes; he had called it to him. But what did this mean? Did it mean he was becoming much stronger? Clow sighed, then winced as his vision came into sharp focus again. 

"Master?" 

"Clow?"

"Papa?"

His guardians' three voices asked the same question all at once. He took a moment to compose himself, he glanced at each of their faces, Hei-ying looked mildly troubled, Keroberos looked very angry and Yue . . . Yue looked a little scared. "Oh . . ." Clow brushed his hand against his own forehead, it was slightly sweaty. He leant over the armrest and pulled Yue up. "Oh . . . I'm so sorry, little moonbeam . . . please, you mustn't be scared . . . Daijobu!" Clow murmured as he rocked Yue, he glanced over the moonchild's shoulder at the other two. "What happened?"

"You passed out just as you were sitting dow—"

"--You almost dropped moonbeam!" Keroberos growled.

"Gomen," Clow looked a little breathless, he pulled Yue's head back slightly, "I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to scare you . . ."

"What happened to you?" Yue plucked a few strands of hair off Clow's sweaty brow, and press his cool hand against it soothingly.

"It's nothing that will ever cause any harm, I just fell into a vision . . ."

"Vision?" Yue blinked, "What—"

Clow pressed a finger against his lips, "No, no. . . It's your birthday, and it's Christmas . . . Questions can wait . . . Daijobu?"

"Daijobu!" Yue confirmed, and slid off his lap. He stood between Hei-ying and Keroberos. 

Hei-ying looked down at his younger brother, "You should be on the other side of Keroberos . . . you are the youngest."

"It's all right with me! Stay there!"

Yue smiled at Keroberos, and then put his whole attention on Papa, Papa was smiling, as he picked up the curiously sparkly wrapped boxes beside his chair. "Hei-ying . . .?"

Hei-ying stepped forward and graciously knelt beside his creator's chair. Clow smiled as he handed a jade green box to his eldest creation. Hei-ying glanced at Clow in slight confusion, "Open it . . ." Clow prompted. Hei-ying meticulously unwrapped the package, unwilling to rip the beautiful jade paper. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Yue fidgeting slightly, the tiny boy was a little impatient. Hei-ying ignored this and lifted the lid; wrapped in the simple green tissue, lay two jade green strips of material. Hei-ying instantly knew that these strips had potent magic tied into them, he picked one up and glanced at Clow curiously.

"They are for you . . ." Clow smiled, he slipped off his chair and knelt in front of the bemused Hei-ying. He quickly picked up the ribbons and tied them around Hei-ying's hands, he smiled as he tied the last bow and clasped Hei-ying's hands together. He was eager to show Hei-ying what new magic he had created for him. He led his eldest creation to the window and opened it. Clow motioned Hei-ying to stand in front of him. When Hei-ying was in place, Clow wrapped his arms around Hei-ying's body of clasped his creation's wrists. 

"All right?" Clow whispered into Hei-ying's ear, ignoring the old shiver his breath always caused. 

"Hai . . ." Hei-ying attempted to compose himself. //I will not lose control in front of him// Hei-ying chanted in his mind, Clow would not want Hei-ying to display affections in front of the others, but he wondered if Clow was having the same trouble. 

Clow smiled, "I want you to concentrate . . ." he pressed Hei-ying's hands together quickly and then pulled them apart suddenly, a beautiful arc of jade green magic flowed between Hei-ying's hands. He knew it was his own magic attack, but somehow the ribbons were amplifying his attack. Instead of the normal one, three jaded daggers spun into existence. Hei-ying gasped slightly, as Clow chuckled, "I thought it might come in handy . . . rather than one attack at a time, you can launch three!"

Hei-ying spread his hands slightly further, as Clow let go, and then threw them forward. The jade daggers ceased their spinning immediately, and flew straight away from him. The deadly attack ploughed straight into the snow-covered earth.

"Wai . . ." Yue murmured as he and Keroberos watched from another closed window. Keroberos remained silent; Hei-ying had been given an even deadlier weapon. Clow smiled, "And now . . ." he turned back to his chair, "Time for Keroberos!"

He lifted a large box and placed it in front of his sun guardian, Keroberos sniffled it hesitantly, he wasn't so sure he wanted an even stronger attack. "Go on . . ." Clow urged, "Open it!"

Keroberos sighed, and extended his claws. A few well place swipes at the box, and his new gift was revealed. "What . . . is it?"

"It's a helmet." Clow enthused again. He'd finally decided that the Cardcaptor wasn't the one who was going to give Keroberos the strange helmet, Clow was. Clow smiled at he lifted the light weighted metal, and beckoned Keroberos over, "This will protect you . . ." 

"From what?"

"What ever it is that attacks you . . . I don't know, I just thought since you can't have ceremonial robes like your brothers I thought you might like to have something a bit different."

"It's very handsummer!"

"Handsome . . ." Hei-ying rolled his eyes as he corrected Yue.

"Handsome, it's very handsome!" Yue smiled, "Especially this . . ." he brushed his hand over the blood red jewel that sat upon Keroberos' chest. Clow smiled as he sat back in his chair once more, "Do you like it?"

Keroberos raised his head, and stared at Clow, "Yes . . ." he nodded, "I do!"

Clow breathed out, "good." He started to twiddle his thumbs and looked around, "Hmmm . . . I wonder . . . Could there be someone else . . .?" He looked to the other side of his chair; "There are presents here for someone . . . Who could that be?"

Yue looked at Hei-ying, his elder brother had removed the ribbons and was examining them. He swivelled his head to look at his second eldest brother, who beamed at him, he pushed his shoulder against Yue's lightly, "I think he might mean a certain little moonbeam . . ."

Yue slowly walked over to Clow, and knelt by his chair, ". . .Papa?"

"First, for Christmas . . ." Clow picked up a slim case, "I give you this . . ." he held his hand out to Yue, "Please give me your hand . . ." once Yue placed his hand in Clow, Clow opened the case with his other hand, he picked up a cool blue ribbon, it was the same colour as his robes' new hand gloves and foot straps, Yue realised. He grew excited as Clow started to tie it around his hands. As soon as he tied it, the ribbon disappeared.

 "Don't worry . . . It's meant to do that . . ." Clow murmured as he stood and moved to the open window again; he smiled and beckoned Yue over. Yue stood beside Clow as his creator stared out the window. Clow raised the same arm that he had tied the ribbon to on Yue, "Do this . . ." he whispered.

Yue complied and as soon as he raised his arm an ice-cold blue arc of magic formed. Yue gasped slightly, and looked up at Clow, who was breathing slowly, he looked like he wasn't entirely sure that this work. "Now . . . Raise your other hand . . ." 

Yue suddenly had the feeling he knew what to do, "I know . . ." 

Keroberos looked on in amazement, "You know what you are doing already, don't you?"

Yue nodded with confidence, for a few moments he looked older than he was as he raised his other hand, an ice-cold bolt of blue ice appeared and Yue drew it against the bow. He drew back the string slowly, Clow turned to see the full effect of this new weapon he had given Yue. Yue looked every bit the judgement maker he was created to be, and Clow was proud of him. The child would never fail the Cardcaptor, but would also push her to be her very best. 

The day had been spent in a very festive mood, and the three guardians had insisted on trying out their new gifts. Yue and Hei-ying were instantly very good with their new weapons and Keroberos had been a little slow to adjust to the new helmet but eventually he had got it right. Clow watched them from his upstairs study, he would have been out there with them but there were two more things he needed to attend to first. First was Yue's birthday present, which Clow would give to him later in private. It was a special gift, one that Clow had thought long and hard about, and he wanted to be alone when Yue saw it. The child's expression would be . . . perfect, Clow could sense it. 

The other thing were his second gifts to his guardians, Clow turned away from the window and sat at his desk again. Before him lay three perfectly carved jewels, set in three simple earring. One of each of his guardians, the earrings held a new magic for his guardians, but Clow wasn't as sure this new magic would go down well with his creations as he knew his other gifts had. He sighed, //might as well get it over and done with now// the glinting earrings were his real gifts to them, he had just made up those other gifts to make sure that he had something to give them in case his resolve failed. These earrings held their false form inside of them, and Clow wasn't entirely sure how they would take him trying to hide their real forms. Clow sighed, as he stood and opened the window. 

"Hei-ying . . . Keroberos . . . Yue . . . Please attend me."

Hei-ying sat in front of his mirror; the strange person stared back at him. This *false* form Clow had created, he was so . . . unlike him. His whole countenance seemed much more . . . Hei-ying frowned; this false form didn't look as imposing as Hei-ying did. He seemed much more sweet, Clow had explained his false form was intended for the Cardcaptor, to make her feel at complete ease and so he could move around in public places without arousing suspicion. Hei-ying frowned slightly, this false form's eyes were wide, and soft, almost child like. Hei-ying didn't understand why his false form had to look so . . . weak.

"Do you like it?"

Hei-ying turned, his head feeling a little light as his short fringe fell into his eyes, "I will require so time to adjust to this new . . . form." He turned back to the mirror. "Do *you* like it?"

Clow smiled and walked further into the room, he placed his hands on Hei-ying's shoulders and bent down to stare into Hei-ying's eyes through the mirror. "I think he's very handsome, he suits you . . . however . . ." Clow smiled, "I couldn't think of a name for him . . . Will you choose one?"

"I believe it would be too confusing for the Cardcaptor for her adviser to have two names, I believe I will keep my given name."

Clow smiled, "Very well, you may change his name at anytime, whatever you choose I shall approve of."

Hei-ying nodded, and continued to stare into the mirror, as Clow left the room. 

A funny flapping noise made Clow pause just as he stepped out into the hall, "Keroberos . . .?"

The tiny false form of Keroberos floated down from it's hiding place, "Why did you do. . ." he stretched out his now stubby arms to look at them, "Why did you give us this. . .?"

"So you could accompany the Cardcaptor wherever she goes and not be noticed . . . a good idea, ni?" He opened his arms and Keroberos slipped into them as he used to when he was a kitten, he started to purr, Clow smiled softly down at the golden, winged lion-bear, ". . . And maybe a little bit because I missed holding you like this . . ."

"I always knew you had ulterior motives Clow . . ." Clow chuckled as they walked down the corridor to Yue's room. Clow knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in Papa!" 

Clow pushed the door open and stepped into Yue's bedroom, he smiled, it was almost exactly like the bedroom he had seen in his vision the night he created Yue. Yue's crib had now been replaced with a big bed, and like his brothers, Yue now had a dresser with a mirror on it. He, like Hei-ying, sat in front of this mirror, staring at the strange face that stared back at him. Yue's was just like Hei-ying's, the idea being was that the two could be mistaken for twins, except for their hair, //Just like their true forms// Clow thought happily, Yue's false form had amber eyes because Clow thought Yue's natural eye colour would be a little too revealing. Hei-ying's false form had dark chocolate brown hair, and Yue's had grey, again for the simple matter that their true form's natural hair colours were both a little on the supernatural side.

Yue's false form was adorable at such a young age, his dapple-grey hair fell over his eyes slightly, and there was no other word for it Yue, in this false form, simply looked . . .

"Adorable!" Clow gushed; Keroberos rolled his false form's beady little eyes and swatted Clow with his tail.

"Clow, you have a lot of problems!" He fluttered over to his younger brother. "So, what do you think?"

"You look very handsome!" Yue smiled and then looked back into the mirror.

"I meant you, and my true form is much better!"

"I don't see any difference . . ." Yue peered into the mirror again.

"I'm bigger for starters, and my eyes are so much more striking, and—"

"You look like a stuffed animal." Hei-ying dryly observed from the doorway. He glanced at Yue; "May I come in little moonbeam?"

"H-hai . . ." Yue would never dream of ever saying 'No' to Hei-ying, Keroberos had warned him against making Hei-ying angry, but never explained what happened if he ever did.

"I happen to think this false form is very handsome!" Keroberos glared at Hei-ying, "And don't call me a stuffed animal."

"Why not?" Hei-ying folded his arms, his cool demeanour seeped through to his kind looking false form, it was a little unsettling, however Clow was confident that Hei-ying would soon learn to play act.

"Because I say so!"

"And what are you going to do about it . . . Stuffed animal?"

Keroberos started to growl, and fluttered closer to Hei-ying and started to mutter some rapid fire German. Clow raised an eyebrow, German was only one of the few languages he wasn't so confident in speaking and hadn't bothered to teach Yue, Keroberos and Hei-ying had discovered this and used the language to swear at each other. Clow shook his head, and moved closer to Yue. "How do you like it?"

"I don't see any difference . . ." he murmured again, "I look the same, just that my hair is shorter and my eyes are . . ." Yue frowned as he tried to come up with an adequate word, "Well . . . they're not the same colour."

"I have given your brothers the choice to choose their own names for the false forms; they have both chosen to stay with the same name . . . but . . ."

Yue smiled, "But . . .?"

"I would like to be a little selfish with you . . ." Clow admitted with a smile, "Would you mind if I gave this form of yours a name?"

Yue's eyes crossed slightly as he thought about it, he shook his head, "Ummm . . . no!"

Clow smiled and breathed out slightly, "Okay . . . I would like to call your false form Yukito. Yukito Tsukishiro Reed." 

Yue smiled, "Snow rabbit of the white castle?"

Clow smiled, "Hai!" 

"Really?" Yue broke into a huge smile, and threw his arms around Clow.

Clow hugged him back, "Really . . ." he held him for a few seconds, just trying to place the familiar scent of Yue's hair. Clow had done this every time Yue was near, Keroberos smelt of sunflowers, always of a summer afternoon. Hei-ying smelt of spring, just like Keroberos, he smelt of the season he had been created in, he smelt of fresh spring rain and roses. Clow frowned slightly, he was a little too familiar with the way Hei-ying smelt, he shrugged the regret off and concentrate on Yue. He smelt like . . . he smelt like . . .

"Hei-ying! No!"

Clow's eyes snapped open at Yue's frightened call; he let go of his youngest and spun to look at his eldest. Hei-ying was paused, holding Keroberos' tiny tail in one hand, and scissors in the other. Keroberos was struggling to get away.

"Hei-ying!" Clow snapped; he supported Hei-ying's little outbursts of emotions but not to the point where it would harm his brothers. "Let him go!"

Keroberos still struggled, pulling as far as he could away from Hei-ying's pinching fingers. Hei-ying glanced briefly at Clow, and then settled his eyes on Yue. He smirked slightly, then instantly let Keroberos go. The tiny toy like lion spun in the air before hitting one of the bedposts. Keroberos slid down the post dazed and slightly confused, Yue struggled past Clow. "Keroberos!" He cried out slightly distressed, he scooped up his elder Oniichan. "Keroberos!! Are you alright?!"

Keroberos rolled out of Yue's arms and turned into his true form instantly, "I will be!" He roared, "Come here Hei-ying!"

Hei-ying's wings appeared and snapped back to reveal his true form, the black haired angel growled at Keroberos, "Make me, stuffed animal!"

That was the final straw, Keroberos suddenly leapt up and tried to land on Hei-ying, but Hei-ying moved. There was a loud snap, as Keroberos and Hei-ying went crashing to the ground. "ARGGAAAA!" Hei-ying yelled in sheer agony and wrench Keroberos off him. The lion landed on his feet and was about to strike again, when Hei-ying raised his hand. A sharp green glow appeared in his palm threateningly. 

"Onegai! No!" Yue ran between the two warring brothers, "Please don't!" The tiny grey haired boy held his hands up to Hei-ying, "Please don't!" He entreated again. "You'll hurt him . . ."

"I'll hurt him?! Fucking right I'll bloody hurt him!" Hei-ying snarled, "HE'S BROKEN MY FUCKING WING!!"

Yue stepped back at the ferocity of his eldest brother's voice, but jumped forward when Keroberos roared again, "I'LL BREAK MORE THAN THAT, YOU BASTARD!" 

 "SILENCE!" Clow bellowed, "THE BOTH OF YOU!" He glared at them coldly, as he raised his hand and twisted it back towards him rapidly. There was a jade and a gold glow, and both Hei-ying and Yue were turned into their false forms. He bent over to pick Yue up, and then glared at them both. "You should be ashamed of yourself, ruining such a day!"

"I can't turn back to my true form!" Keroberos squeaked angrily in his new high voice.

"My wing!" Hei-ying protested just as vehemently. "He's broken my wing!"

Clow ignored them, Yue was trembling, his false form's wide amber eyes were brimming with tears. They had scared him. "I'm sorry that I must do this, my little moonbeam. . ." 

Yue frowned, what was Papa sorry to do? He puzzled this as Clow raised his hand. The small boy suddenly found Clow's fingers very entrancing, there was a slight glow to them as Clow raised them to show Yue his palm. Yue wondered why would Papa feel sorry. . . about. . . some. . .thing so. . .

Clow picked Yue up and laid him on the bed, he was so angry with Keroberos and Hei-ying but he didn't want to scare Yue any further. "Return to your rooms," he said quietly, he couldn't even bring himself to look at them, "Go . . . and I don't want to even see the either of you until the day after tomorrow." 

Keroberos stared at the back of Clow, knowing that provoking Clow even further wouldn't help him get back to his true form, but that wasn't what made him feel so bad. He had allowed Hei-ying to get to him, and Yue had seen something other than his bestest Oniichan. Keroberos swallowed heavily, and silently wished his tiny brother a good night, before fluttering out of the room. 

"I said go to your room." Clow repeated quietly. He could still feel Hei-ying behind him.

"He broke my wing . . ." Clow turned to look at Hei-ying, in his false form, he was clutching his shoulder. The broken wing had translated to a fracture in his false form's shoulder blade. It was nothing life threatening, Clow assessed. Both he and Hei-ying were shaking in unspent anger.

"You have scared Yue. . ." Clow restrained himself from spitting, he stepped swiftly over to Hei-ying, he placed his hand over Hei-ying's shoulder. He closed his eyes briefly and Hei-ying expected to feel a warm rush of magic heal the painful injury. Clow's eyes snapped open, "You will live. . . and it won't affect your ability to fly. I am going to let it heal naturally, tomorrow morning you will report to my study, I will set the bone, and then you will return to your room. I will not see nor hear from you for the rest of that day. Understand?" Hei-ying's eyes widened, he nodded mutely. Clow continued, "I expected so much more from you. Of both of you . . . I thought you would have understood the concept that you will both be together for the rest of your lives by now." There was a groan from the bed as Yue started to regain consciousness. Clow looked down at him, then back at Hei-ying. "Go . . . now."

Hei-ying nodded, and turned on his heel, leaving the room swiftly and silently. Clow sighed, and sat heavily on the bed. Their first Christmas, and Yue's birthday had been ruined by his eldest creations' sibling rivalry. He pulled Yue's birthday present out of his pocket and stared at it. He wondered if Yue would still be interested in celebrating his birthday, or if he'd rather stay asleep and try to forget the horrendous evening.

There was another groan, followed by a short burst of a blue glow, Yue had returned to his true form. He sat up and looked around, Clow was sitting at the end of his bed, looking sadly at a flat, wrapped gift. He looked sad, and Yue didn't like it. Clow always looked happy and it wasn't nice when he was sad. Yue looked around, Keroberos and Hei-ying weren't around, in fact, Yue reached out with his magic senses, they were in their rooms. Yue sighed, and felt unbearably sad. Clow had sent them there without letting him say goodnight. A small sob brought Clow out of his deep mulling, he looked up and Yue was sitting up in his bed, sobbing uncontrollably. "Come here, my little moonbeam," Clow sighed, and opened his arms to Yue. "Let me make it all better."

The next morning, Clow woke up and, for a moment, didn't know where he was; he stared up at the canopy above his bed. It wasn't the usual violet and red one, with stars and moons and suns all over it . . . it was a silk white one, with moons and snowflakes . . .

"Yue . . .?"

Clow sat up, the tiny boy wasn't in bed with him, he looked around. The drapes were still drawn and the curtains remains shut. Clow rose and looked out the window, it was just before dawn.  He frowned; he didn't make any of his creations wake up before dawn, why would Yue be up at this time? He reached out with his senses. Yue was in Keroberos' room. Clow sighed, he had meant it when he had banished Keroberos to his room, but hadn't thought that Yue might go to him.

"Moonbeam . . . You really shouldn't be here, Clow was very angry last night . . ."

"No he wasn't! He was really sad, and he almost cried! I just want to make things better! " 

"I know you do . . . but sometimes it's better if you let Clow deal with things his own way . . . he can be stubborn about things like this."

Yue brushed his long hair back; it was tickling his nose as he lay in bed with his elder brother. He stared up at Keroberos' canopy, it was bright yellow, and was just like his curtains too. Yue sighed, he'd gone to Hei-ying but Hei-ying was meditating . . . or at least that's what Keroberos had said it was . . . to Yue, it looked more like he had hurt himself in the head and was lying on the floor until the pain went away. Yue sighed; he had gone to Keroberos and at first Keroberos had pretended he was sleeping. But when Yue wouldn't leave, he had opened his eyes.

"Why must we leave him?" Yue stared at the gift Clow had given him, it was one of his favourite cards, the glow, and Clow said it was under his protection now. Whatever that meant, but if Yue told it to make pretty glowy lights for him, it did. That made him happy but . . . it wasn't any fun because he didn't have anyone to show it to, "If everyone says sorry now then we can be all happy again!"

Keroberos sighed, and rested his head on his forepaws. He closed his eyes and murmured, "If only life was as simplistic as you and Clow see it . . ."

"What do you mean?"

"He means you are disobeying the Master!" Hei-ying spat from the doorway.

"Get out of my room!" Keroberos growled softly, not willing to scare Yue again.

"I'm not in your room, stuffed animal, and I was addressing Yue . . ."

Yue sat up, "Gomen . . ."

"Do not apologise to me, you should return to your room, unless you would like to get Master Clow angry against you as well!" Hei-ying frowned at him, then turned and stalked back to his room.

Yue swallowed, "But Clow didn't get angry last night . . . he was really upset!"

Keroberos sat up, "Yue . . . as much as I hate to admit it . . . Hei-ying might well be right, please go back to your room now . . ." 

"But I want to stay with you!"

Keroberos licked Yue affectionately. "And I wish you could, but I don't want any more trouble and you don't want Clow to get any angrier with everyone, do you?"

"No. . ." Yue sighed, "But when will I see you again?"

Keroberos sat up, his small black eyes blinked. "Clow said I have to stay here for today and tonight . . . but trust me first thing tomorrow morning . . ."

Yue smiled and nodded, "I'll get up extra 'specially early!" The small boy promised then walked over to Keroberos' window. He sat on the open window's sill. "Sayonara . . .?"

"Iie. . ." Keroberos smiled, "ja ne!" 

Yue smiled and then nodded again; he spread his wings and fluttered out into the early dawn's cool air. Keroberos sighed; "I might as well sleep for the entire day . . . nothing else I can do." 

-------------------

And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!

Clow: I wouldn't let him leave his wing like that!!!

DrM: But you're really mad at him for ruining Yue's birthday!

Hei-ying: You know . . . I've got a broken wing . . . and Clow's choosing Yue over me and my broken wing. . . 

Yue: Damn straight!

Hei-ying: You realise that grounds for killing you. . .

Kero: Touch a hair on his head---!

Hei-ying: [touches hair] Oh you mean like this, stuffed animal?!

[Kero and Hei-ying start to have fight]

DrM: [over ruckus] HEY, WHILE I SORT THIS OUT HOW ABOUT DROPPING ME A REVIEW!! ARIGATO!! [Turns to Kero and Hei-ying] GUYS!! NO HOLDS BARRED!! [Yells at Clow] WHERE'S THE POPCORN?!

Clow and DrM: FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! [look at each other] TOGA! TOGA! TOGA! [crack open beers] CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!

Yue: [closes door on all of them, sighs] I guess it's up to me to say. . . Please join us in the next chapter, arigato.


	16. Fear

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me! All praise J.K and HP for the term Muggles!! 

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Fifteen: Fear

The stagecoach swayed from side to side as it travelled down the Reed Mansion's drive. A small white nose pressed hard against the window, the outside was new, and amazing to the tiny boy.

"Papa?"

"Yes, Yue?"

"How do the horses know where to go?"

"The coach driver leads them with the reins."

 Keroberos and Hei-ying sat on the opposite seat, Clow and Yue on the other. It had been two days since Clow had lost his temper with his two eldest guardians. Yue hadn't showed any signs of being particularly affected by the incident but Clow was aware that Yue had snuck into Keroberos' more than once during the day Clow had forbid Keroberos and Hei-ying to leaves their rooms. Clow didn't do anything about it, nor let Yue know that he was aware of the secretive visits. Clow flicked a page over, and smiled, as Yue sank back onto the dusty red seat. "Oh . . ."

Yue glanced up at his two older brothers. Keroberos chuckled, he looked different without his helmet and his wings, but Papa had said that they had to pretend that Keroberos was their pet because . . . Yue frowned as he tried to remember exactly what Papa had said, it was because they didn't want the Muggles to find out about the magic. Yue frowned again. "Papa?"

"Yes, Yue?"

"What are Muggles?"

Clow smiled, Yue was in another inquisitive mood. //Good// he thought as he opened his mouth to answer.

"Muggles. Slang term used by magic persons." Hei-ying sighed, "Most often to describe or taunt the magically-deprived."        

Yue glanced from his oldest brother to Papa, "Really?"

Clow opened his mouth again to answer, but Hei-ying spoke again. "Of course, really."

"Hey!" Keroberos snapped indignantly, "Leave the kid alone!"

Hei-ying sighed sharply and stared out the window, "Stop referring to him as if he was some sort of goat. Yue is going to be the Judgement Maker . . ." Hei-ying gazed at Yue's reflection in the glass, "He should know things like this already."

Yue bit his lips and stared at the floor, Hei-ying was right as always. He hated it when Hei-ying got annoyed like this; it always made Yue feel so stupid. Clow looked up from his book again, at the uneasy silence that had descend in the carriage. Hei-ying was glaring out the window, Keroberos shook his head, and then tried to catch Yue's eye. Yue was staring at the old wood floor of the coach. Clow sighed; once again Hei-ying had forced Yue into a self-doubting silence. 

He glanced out the window. "Ah!" He said, "There it is." He allowed a smile to play on his lips as he watched Yue out of the corner of his eye. Yue could never stand it when Clow said things like that. The child instantly snapped out of his melancholy, and jumped up onto the seat again, he pressed his hands against the windowpane again. "What?" Yue gasped as the small town came into view, it was still a while away. Keroberos leapt onto the seat between Clow and Yue, he leant his heavy head on Yue's. "That's called a town." He said proudly, he had only to the town once or twice, but this was Yue's first time. "Muggles live there." 

"Really?"

Hei-ying sighed and pressed his forehead against the glass, Yue never accepted a word his brothers said without checking it with Clow first; it was always 'Really?' this and 'Really?' that. Hei-ying's eyes narrowed further, by the sound of it, it was going to be one of those days when Yue *really* should have been drowned at birth . . .

Once in the town, Yue and Hei-ying turned into their false forms. Clow asked the coach driver to return to pick them up in three hours, and turned to look at his creations as they took in the hustle and bustle. Keroberos sat by Yue, who was now in his amber eyed, grey haired form, Yukito. Hei-ying stood slightly off, his face betraying boredom as he glared at his brother. While this was all new to them, he had been visiting the town for nearly a decade.

"Clow REED!" A voice called from behind him, the town's doctor waved from within the crowd. "Reed! How have you been keeping?"

Clow laughed, "Quite well, thank you!" 

Louison glanced over Clow's shoulder, "You still have that . . . what did you call it?"

"A lion," Clow chuckled, he turned and patted his cloak, it was the signal that Keroberos had to join him. "Keroberos."

As Keroberos joined Clow, Hei-ying looked at Yue. The tiny boy had stepped behind him, shy of the stranger. "Let go of my robes." Hei-ying spat. Yukito's amber eyes widened, as he stepped away from his elder brother. 

Hei-ying turned his attention back to the doctor, who had spotted him. "Hei-ying! You've grown since I last saw you!"

Hei-ying smiled slightly and inclined his head. "It has been a while since I last came to town." 

Clow smiled, "We've been away so long because we have a new addition to our family . . ." Clow turned, "Don't we, Yukito?" The little grey haired boy didn't answer, in fact he wasn't there. "Hei-ying, where's Yukito?" 

Hei-ying looked around him briefly; "I don't know . . ." he peered off into the crowd disinterested; "He was here a minute ago." 

Keroberos growled deeply, his eyes blazing at Hei-ying, who turned and snapped, "Don't you growl at me Keroberos! The foolish boy has probably just wondered off."

Yue gazed thoughtfully into the strange gathering of water, unaware of his now worried family who had split up in the hopes of finding him sooner, he was more interested in this strange pooling of water than he was of the vaguely magical man that was talking to Papa. He knew he shouldn't have strayed so far from Keroberos' side, Keroberos had sat him down after breakfast that day and asked him quietly to promise that he would stay close by. 

But then Keroberos had gone closer to the stranger, and Hei-ying didn't want Yue to stand so close to his robes . . . Yue looked at his own robes, //Just like Hei-ying's// he thought proudly. Although he didn't want to be as mean as Hei-ying was, he did want to look as composed as Hei-ying when he grew up. Then the Cardcaptor would really like him! She'd think he was cool and really smart and . . .

Yue cocked his false form's head, there were strange green ripples breaking the thin ice on the water surface.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" A soft voice murmured. Yue looked up slightly, Hei-ying was standing *ON* the water. Yue gasped and pushed his tiny body up high on his toes to see better over the stone wall of the bridge. "How are you doing . . . that?"

Hei-ying smiled, "It's a special power Master Clow gave us . . ."

"All of us?"

"Of course . . ." Hei-ying bobbed slightly, the elegant green ripples increased. Yue smiled, he loved pretty things like that.

"Can I do it?"

"Perhaps . . ." Hei-ying motioned him forwards, holding his black leather gloved hand towards his smallest brother, "You'd have to try it for yourself . . ." 

"Really?"

Hei-ying quashed a instinctive 'Of course, really!' in favour of a more luring smile, "Yes, little moonbeam . . ."

"Anything?" Clow hid behind some bushes as Keroberos returned to his large form. The lion's large paws landed softly on the ground. 

"No, nothing! Where could he have gone?!" Keroberos growled, Hei-ying hadn't joined them as he was supposed to, //Hei-ying . . . if you have something to do with this . . .//

"What does he look like Clow?" Louison wiped his brow; Clow had become frantic in his search for this latest creation.

"He's just above my knee, with grey hair and amber eyes and should answer to the name of Yukito Tsukishiro Reed . . . failing that saying 'Yue' will return him to his true form . . ." 

"Clow," Keroberos snapped, "Calm down, you're babbling now!"

Clow sank to his knees by Keroberos, "Where could he have gone . . .? What possibly could have attracted his attention?"

Louison patted Clow on the shoulder, "Let's have another look . . . you never know, he might be talking to those Muggle magicians we saw . . ."

"Okay," Clow nodded, he glanced up at the sky, " . . .Keroberos . . .?"

"I'll have another look from the air . . ." as soon as Clow was out of sight though, Keroberos turned and headed in the same direction Hei-ying had instantly taken when Clow agreed that it would be quicker if they split up . . .

"What's that under the water?" Yue paused; he could have sworn that there was something moving under the water. He was sitting on the stone brick wall now, in his false form as well. 

Hei-ying couldn't have wished for a better scenario if he tried. He had learnt over the last few days that the transformation from false to true form depended on how much fear the true form was sensing. If there was no reason to panic, the full longer transformation took place, this reserved on energy but took a few seconds longer. However once the true form realised there was something wrong, despite the huge amount of energy it took, the more instantaneous transformation took place. If Hei-ying could keep Yue from realising something was wrong for long enough . . .

"I wouldn't think there was anything under the water . . . that just the illusion that my waves cause in the pond."

"Oh . . ." Yue got ready to push himself off the wall when he paused again, "What's a pond?" 

Hei-ying sighed, "It's a small pool of water . . . it's not very deep and there is *nothing* moving under the surface . . ."

"Really?"

Hei-ying rolled his eyes, he took a deep breath, if he kept his cool, Yue wouldn't notice that Hei-ying was about to solve one of the most irritating nuisances of his life . . . "Yes, Yue . . . really."

"Oh . . . how do I make the pretty glowy things?"

Hei-ying's eyes slid shut, "I've never really asked why . . . I assume it's the falloff from the magic I dispel while floating above the water . . ."

Yue stare thoughtfully at the glowing green ripples for a little bit. "Why hasn't Clow shown me how to do this yet?"

"Because you are still a little too young to do such a thing!" Hei-ying's eyes slid open as Keroberos stood on his hind legs next to Yue. "And Hei-ying knows that!"

Yue jumped slightly and quickly turned away from the water. He jumped off the wall and landed softly on the stone bridge. "Really?" But Keroberos ignored him, and glared at Hei-ying who was still floating over the water. Hei-ying glared back, silently confirming Keroberos' fears. He had no intention of killing Keroberos anymore; his murderous gaze had slipped off the guardian beast long ago. Keroberos looked at Yue, "Little moonbeam . . ."

Yue clasped his hands behind his back, "Gomen . . . but come look at this!" He pushed up onto his tiny pale toes and stared at the glowing jade ripples. "Aren't they pretty?"

Keroberos placed his front paws on the wall and stared down at the water. He glanced up at Hei-ying; it was the same enticing green waves, beautiful and deadly, that drew Yue. "I thought you promised you'd stay close, Yue . . ."

"I did . . ." Yue looked at Keroberos, why was he being so stern all a sudden?

"But you have broken that promise haven't you? You must always keep your promises Yue . . . you will not make a good Judgement Maker if you ignore the rules!"

"I . . ." Yue was a little bewildered by Keroberos' seriousness. Hei-ying floated over and landed on the cold stone bridge behind him. He bent over and scooped Yue up into his arms. 

"Keroberos . . ." Hei-ying rubbed his cheek affectionately against Yue's, " . . . Stop being so mean . . ." he purred slightly as he looked over the bridge into the water. The reflection of Hei-ying and Yue stared back, "No harm was done and our little moonbeam was just curious . . ." Yue giggled slightly as Hei-ying rubbed their noses together, "Weren't you?"

"Well, I . . ." Yue began, but Hei-ying ignored him and looked up.

"We found him!" He yelled, "All safe and sound!!"

Hei-ying smirked down at Keroberos as he walked towards Clow, Yue looked over Hei-ying's shoulder, wondering why Keroberos was so mean and Hei-ying was so nice all a sudden . . . he scrunched up his nose, and hoped Keroberos being so angry at him wasn't going to be a long time thing. 

"Pay attention!" Yue pulled his eyes away from the snow, and stared at Hei-ying again. It had been snowing for days, and Clow had said there was a storm coming. Yue smiled, that meant lots of snow would be coming! "Now, you are the . . .?"

"Judgement Maker."

"State your name."

"Yue, the Judgement—"

"Wrong!" Hei-ying slapped his hand down on the book of incantations; "You are the Judge, Yue the Judge. Only others when referring to you will call you the Judgment Maker! Now . . ." he flicked a few pages, "Recite after me. O cards . . . created by Master Clow . . ."

"Aren't I supposed to just say Clow?"

Hei-ying glared at him, but continued, "I said 'recite after me.' O cards created . . ."

"O cards created by Clow."

Hei-ying rolled his eyes, "There is one who desires to be worthy of becoming your Master . . ."

"Clow said the Cardcaptor would be a girl . . . shouldn't I say 'Mistress'?" Hei-ying glared at him, Yue swallowed, and recited, "There is one who wishes worthy of becoming--"

"Stop right there, who *desires*, not wishes! Say the whole thing again."

"O cards created by Clow . . ." Yue swallowed, "There is a girl who desires to be . . ." he froze as the unfamiliar words refused to enter his mind, "Um . . . O cards of Clow . . ."

Hei-ying stood and walked over to Yue's desk, the small boy was had now the appearance of a four-year-old human, his progress had been much, much slower than Hei-ying and Keroberos'. Hei-ying scowled as Yue stuttered, "There is a . . . um . . ."

Hei-ying crouched down beside Yue and picked up the little child's clenched fist. He force Yue's little finger out of the fist and held it tightly. Pulling it back slightly, Hei-ying glared at Yue. "Say it properly."

Yue winced as Hei-ying started to push the finger back further than it was supposed to go, "O cards created by Clow—" Hei-ying pushed it harder, "O cards created by *Master* Clow," Yue spoke quickly, "There is one who wish—desires to be worthy of becoming your Master . . ."

"A Cardcaptor chosen by . . ."

"A Cardcaptor chosen by Keroberos the Appointer, shown the way by Hei-ying the Adviser . . ." Yue licked his lips and prayed he'd get to the end of the incantation faster than Hei-ying could break his finger. He thought about Hei-ying's wing, Clow had set it, and allowed it to heal naturally. Although it had healed completely now, Hei-ying still found flying a little difficult. He got very tired quickly, and complained it felt like the wing had been torn. "To find out if this Cardcaptor truly qualities . . ." he winced again as Hei-ying pushed the small finger past the ninety degree angle, he corrected his error, "Qualifies to become our Master . . . I, Yue the Judgment Maker . . . OOOW!"

Hei-ying snapped the finger back completely. "Judge, you are Yue the Judge . . . not Judgement Maker!!" He stood suddenly and stormed back to the desk, "You will fail the Master, if you keep getting your incantations wrong." 

"I think you broke my finger." Yue whimpered; he cradled his hand to his chest. Hei-ying glared at him, and paced back over. Yue flinched slightly as Hei-ying crouched down again. "Give me your hand."

Yue tried not to cry as Hei-ying examined the finger, "You will live!" He spat, "And Master Clow will tell you the same . . . do not bother him with your petty problems."

"I won't . . ." Yue nodded tearfully. Hei-ying often inflicted tiny little injuries on Yue, ever since Clow decided to leave his training to his brothers. Hei-ying was sometimes nice, but when it came to his lessons he was always harsh and expected perfection from Yue immediately. Yue wished Keroberos was here, but Keroberos was with Clow, receiving some more lessons in his incantations, Yue liked Keroberos' lessons, it was always in flying, and his attacks. Keroberos was fun and asked the cards to help with his teaching. Yue had become quite good at shooting his ice arrow at the Move card, and the Woody had provided some challenging obstacle courses. What Yue loved most was the races he had against Keroberos. Yue was almost good enough to fly side by side with Keroberos, and he could already out fly the Fly card. 

Hei-ying stood again, "Your lesson with me has ended . . . however I strongly suggest you learn the corrected form of the invocation before your lesson with the Master." 

"Yes Hei-ying-san." Yue stood and gathered his books, his finger was very painful now, and he glanced at it. It was beginning to swell; it was the worst injury Hei-ying had ever inflicted, he didn't know how he was going to hide it from Clow in time for his lesson that afternoon.

The snow gusted in endless swirls outside the window.

"So much snow, don't you think little moonbeam?" Clow smiled at Yue, the small boy was completely engrossed in the book he held in his lap. "All right . . ." Clow sighed, Yue was usually more interested in the snow; "Please recite your final incantation."

Yue didn't look up from his writing book, as he murmured, "Please close your eyes . . . Judgement complete . . . I, Yue the Judgemen— Yue the Judge, accept the Cardcaptor as the new Master."

"Well done, now in the unlikely event she fails the judgment, what do you say?"

"This is the end." Yue said softly, "You have lost. The seal on the cards must be broken once again; on top of that the disaster will befall upon this world. The disaster is to forget. If the candidate chosen by Keroberos the Appointer, shown the way by Hei-ying the Adviser . . . cannot defeat Yue, the Judgemen—" Yue pursed his lips together and tried again, "Yue the Judge, the Clow cards . . . and everyone involved with the Clow cards . . .will forget . . . the feeling of . . .of . . ." Yue faltered, and cringed. He had been trying so hard to get this right, even with the pain in his finger; he had tried to get it right. And now, in front of Clow Reed, he was failing. He tried to hold back the tears that had been building all afternoon. "Everyone involved with the Clow cards . . . will forget . . . the feeling of . . . of . . ."

For the first time that afternoon, Yue looked up from his book. Clow was looking at him with concern; his little moonbeam had been unusually quiet since his training had started. Clow sighed and shuffled along the window seat, he pulled the book out of Yue's hands and pick his little cold hands up, "The next line is 'Will forget the feeling of love towards the person they loved the most' . . . Yue?" Clow squeezed his pale hands a little tighter, "Is there something wrong?"

Yue was trying very hard not to wince, Clow sighed and looked down at their clasped hands. That's when he noticed.

He slowly brought his face up to look as Yue. He was silent for a few seconds, as Yue looked away. Clow placed his hand under Yue's cheek and pulled his face back toward Clow. Yue was trying desperately not to cry, as Clow said quietly. "Who did this to you?"

Keroberos shook the snow off his fur, as he stepped back into the mansion. He was coming to look for Yue; he was late for his flying lesson. It wasn't important, since the snow was getting to think to fly in safely. He yawned, it wasn't summer and he didn't like the snow as much as Hei-ying and Yue did. He frowned as he briefly wondered which new pain Hei-ying had inflicted on Yue during their lesson today. 

Hei-ying had managed to get Yue to think that if he went to Clow with his injuries, Clow would be impossibly angry with him for not taking his punishment for getting Hei-ying's incantation lessons right instantly. No matter what Keroberos said, Yue staunchly refused to show Clow the little cuts, and bruises Hei-ying wreaked on his pale skin. The injuries were always out of sight, and Yue had really come to believe that the injuries were his own fault. 

Keroberos sighed, Yue was becoming very quiet and his false form was always seen when Yue want to hide away from them. It was almost as if Yue thought that by hiding his true form's injuries behind his false form's ever present smile, Clow would never notice the subtle changes in Yue's demeanour. Clow was far too trusting of his creations, Keroberos thought, //Too trusting of *Hei-ying*// he amended. But still, Clow didn't want either Keroberos or Hei-ying to be present at the other's lessons for fear that they would provoke each other into another fight.

//Keroberos! Hei-ying! Come to my study. // Clow's thought angrily rang out loudly, // NOW!//

Keroberos frowned, what had Hei-ying done now? He sighed as he spread his wings and took flight off to Clow's upstairs study. He met Hei-ying just outside the door. "What have you done?" he spat.

Hei-ying frowned, and then hissed at Keroberos, "If he has said something . . . if you say anything . . . I'll *kill* him!"

"Which of you did this?" Clow frowned at his two eldest creations; Yue refused to say anything and sat sniffling on the window seat. Keroberos and Hei-ying looked at each other. Neither had said a word, since they had stepped into the room, and half an hour had past. Clow was fuming, one of his guardians had broken Yue's finger he was sure of it.

"Master?" Hei-ying began meekly, "What is it you are referring to?"

Clow blinked, and then pointed at Yue. "His finger has been broken. Which one of you has done this?"

Keroberos and Hei-ying glanced at Yue, who swallowed. While Keroberos was silently urging him to say something, Hei-ying's jade eyes narrowed. He squeezed his own eyes shut and made his decision. 

"Neither of them did it, Clow!" Yue said quickly, "I . . . I broke it myself when I . . . I tripped over earlier." 

As Clow turned as this unexpected confession, Yue opened his eyes. Keroberos held his eyes for a few seconds before looking at Hei-ying, who nodded, and turned his attention to Clow. "The foolish boy must learn to be a little more graceful. No judgement maker would ever be taken seriously he continually trips over his own robes."

Clow sank on to the seat, Yue wasn't telling him the truth, and the other two were keeping the reality from him. He stared at Yue, as the small boy turned his attention back on to him, "Why didn't you tell me about it then?"

Yue glanced at Hei-ying, who walked over and placed a hand on Yue's small shoulder. "You didn't heal my wing when I broke it. . . he must have assumed that you would do the same to him."

Clow stared at Yue, Hei-ying was either giving the boy excuses for his behaviour . . . or he was the cause of the fear filled lies Yue was spinning. Clow glanced at Keroberos, Keroberos had a fearsome temper when provoked but he had never shown any aggression to Yue, Clow couldn't believe that Keroberos was the tormenter. But then again he couldn't believe Hei-ying was either, although both had been aggressive to each other, neither had been cruel to Yue before. Clow didn't understand, why were they hiding this from him . . . and which was Yue's tormenter?

"Oh Yue . . ." Clow sighed, and pulled the boy on to his lap, he began to heal the finger, "You must come to me if you ever hurt yourself again . . ."

-------------------

And now it's Time for LEAVE IT TO DR MEGALOMANIA!!

Clow: ALL RIGHT! 'Fess up! Which of you broke his finger!!

DrM: [writes on Weakest Link card] Hei-ying!

Kero: [writes on Weakest Link card] Hei-ying!!

Yue: [writes on Weakest Link card] Hei-ying!!!

Hei-ying: [writes on Weakest Link card] ME!!!!

Ghost of Mister Hilligans: [writes on Weakest Link card] For th' love of --- Damnit Laddie! HEI-YING!!!!!

Clow: I see . . . so none of you are willing to give me the truth! I'm very disappointed.

DrM, Kero, Yue, Hei-ying, Ghost of Hilligans: [crash to the ground, then leap to feet, and sweat drop, quickly change name on Weakest Link cards] Clow Reed!

Anne Robinson: Clow Reed . . . you leave with nothing, with four votes . . . you are the weakest link! [Scary twitch wink] Goodbye! [Turns ice glare on readers] R&R or you too will be the Weakest Link . . . come back for the next part of 'In This Tainted Soul . . .' [Scary twitch wink] Goodbye!


	17. Broken

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Sixteen: Broken

The storm was getting worse, and Clow had decided that leaving the mansion would be too dangerous for them. So now, Yue and Keroberos were locked in with Hei-ying. Hei-ying had been getting progressively worse; nearly everyday he started to cut Yue's hair even if the small boy's hair hadn't changed in length at all. He started to get even more neurotic and start to refuse to walk anywhere. He even refused to walk on the ground in Clow's study, and Keroberos suspected he even stopped walking in his own room as well. Hei-ying rarely spoke anymore; he answered Clow and Clow alone. Yue and Keroberos received glares whenever either spoke towards him. Keroberos refused to leave Yue's side, since the finger breaking incident, neither Keroberos or Hei-ying left Yue alone for very long. 

Clow was aware of this, and it only served to confuse him more, it seemed like both were guarding Yue against the other. He sighed and turned away from the window. He wished he knew why none of his guardians trusted him enough to tell him the truth about what had happened. He knew Yue was scared, but of whom was he scared? Keroberos and Hei-ying were equally foul to each other at times, but he couldn't see either hurting Yue. Hei-ying had gotten over his initial discomfort at having Yue around, and Keroberos always acted like he adored Yue. Clow sank into his window seat. Who was tormenting his little moonbeam?

Hei-ying levitated along the corridor towards Yue's room, Keroberos had just left to go get something from downstairs. Yue was alone. "Hello little moonbeam . . ."

Yue looked up, Hei-ying was standing in his doorway. "Konnichiwa, Oniisan." He stood and bowed respectfully. Yue had learnt that by treating Hei-ying respectfully lessened the chances of Hei-ying losing his temper. "It's time to cut your hair." Hei-ying smiled, "Follow me."

Yue sighed, Hei-ying had been increasing his haircutting to every day, but this was the first time Hei-ying had asked to do it twice in one day. "Hai . . ." Yue slid off the bed and padded out of the door, maybe if he got it over and done with soon, Hei-ying would leave his hair alone for a few days. 

"I hate you . . ." Yue murmured as he past, Hei-ying smiled as he twisted the sharp pair of scissors in his hands, he had decided that Yue looked too much like him, even though his hair fell to just below his waist. He stepped back before his door and indicated that Yue enter first. Hei-ying knew what he was going to do; he was going to make Yue look completely different from him. 

"I know you do . . ."

Keroberos paused as he past Clow's study, he thought about going in and confessing all to Clow. Hei-ying is the tormentor you're looking for! But Keroberos knew if he told Clow now Hei-ying would kill Yue later, Yue would have to be the one that went to Clow first. Then Clow would be so furious that he'd kill Hei-ying without a second thought, Keroberos shook his head, //No, he wouldn't . . . You're the one that would kill him without a second thought. // 

He had promised Hei-ying that he'd do something dire if Hei-ying harmed Yue; he hadn't said he would kill him. But Keroberos was sure that the both of them understood that Keroberos probably would kill him. Hei-ying had lessened his attacks since Clow had seen the broken finger. They were contained to mere bruises and small cuts with those dreadful scissors he had taken to carrying around with him all the time now.

Clow was unaware of Hei-ying's disturbed mind, Keroberos was sure of it. Perhaps it was because Clow had grown used to Hei-ying being not quite right, or perhaps it was because he didn't think Hei-ying would ever get that dangerous. Keroberos wondered briefly, why would Hei-ying turn like this? What had happened during the ten years between his and Hei-ying's creation that would turn Hei-ying into the corrupted monster he was now?    

Keroberos sighed and continued to walk up the stairs, Clow had a lot of problems, and now, Hei-ying had them too.

"Oniisan, I hate you"

Pale feet dangled in the air. 

"Tell me you love me and I'll let go of your hair . . ." 

"I hate you!"

"Tut tut! More respect for your elders," another lock of hair fell to the ground.

"Oniisan! Let me go!" Yue struggled but the more he struggle the tighter the hand grew.

"Tell me . . ."

Snip, another lock of hair fell to the ground.

"No!"

Snip, snip, two more locks floated.

"Hei-ying! LET HIM GOOO!" A deep growling voice roared. The large lion jumped on the dark haired boy's back. Keroberos sank his teeth into Hei-ying's back.

"Argh!" Hei-ying threw Yue to the hard wood floor. "Bastard!" The sharp scissors swirled in his hand to become a sharp dagger.

"Come here, stuffed animal!" Hei-ying yelled as Keroberos leapt off his back, "Let me cut your tail off for your arrogance!"

Keroberos ran forward quickly as the taller boy lunged toward him. The pointed scissors pierced the ground, as Keroberos ran around and hauled the tiny boy off the ground.

"Get on!" He commanded his younger brother, "Quickly!!"

As soon as Yue wrapped his tiny arms around his think golden neck, Keroberos bolted out of the room and ran down the corridor.

He paused at the corner and stared to see where Hei-ying was, Hei-ying's dark green eyes stared unblinkingly back. He stood in the doorway of his room. The tall, black clothed boy smirked and pulled his hand up; in it he held several locks of Yue's hair. Keroberos growled, Yue quietly sobbed to see his valued hair being held like some sort of trophy.

His green eyes still locked with Keroberos', he raised his other hand. It still held the glinting pair of silver scissors. Hei-ying's smirk disappeared as he pressed the blade against his throat.

The deathly pale face remained completely blank as he drew the blade across his throat slowly. His point made; he stepped back into the room, it's door silently closing.

//It was a message . . .//

And Keroberos understood it's meaning too perfectly, he prayed that Yue was too young to comprehend it as well. 

Hei-ying was going to kill Yue soon . . . and he was going to do it when Keroberos wouldn't ever be able to stop him . . .

"It's all right, moonbeam . . . you can't notice it that much . . ." Keroberos tried to sooth the little boy who had recently become his little brother. He was so small, Keroberos could hardly imagine him as a . . . what was Clow wanted him to be? Keroberos shook his head and returned his attention back to Yue.

The tiny boy was sobbing on his bed, face firmly pressed into his pillow, "Yue . . ." Keroberos hopped (as best he could) onto the bed, "Listen to me . . . stay away from Hei-ying."

"I hate him, I hate him, I hate him!!" Yue started to kick. He didn't seem to notice Kero's serious tone. Yue was rarely seen anymore, as Hei-ying's bullying got infinitely worst and Yue was becoming too scared to go to Clow anymore; instead he hid in his false form. His false form, Yukito was a sweet five year old, with grey hair and amber eyes. Clow affectionately dubbed the false form Yukito, the 'snowy one'. The latest attack probably meant Yue would disappear again, so that Clow wouldn't notice the now very short fringe, Keroberos sighed, //now he wouldn't be able to tie it back like Clow's.// Yue adored Clow, and did everything he could to look like him. He even tried to smile all the time, keeping his eyes closed at the same time. Kero smiled at this as it had often resulted in many a bloody nose, when the tiny boy walked straight into a wall.

"Keroberos?"

The older lion shook his head and returned to the present, the small boy was now sitting up and hugging his knees. "Yes Yue?"

"Why doesn't he like me? What did I do?"

"I don't know . . ." Keroberos padded up closer, and nudged the boy to lie down, as Yue lay back, Keroberos lay with him, "All I know is that I want you to stay away from him . . ." 

Neither noticed a dark figure in the doorway, pale hands encased in black leather gloves twirled the shiny pair of scissors over and over.

"Now . . ." Keroberos continued, "No matter what he says, no matter what he does, keep away from him . . . I don't think he's . . ."

Glinting dark jade eyes stared at them harder; the hands stilled, and then slipped the scissors into a pocket. The dark figure smiled a sinister sneer, as he turned and walked away silently, Keroberos' voice could still be heard clearly in the dark corridor.

". . . I don't think Hei-ying's . . ." Keroberos struggled to find a more careful word, he gave up and used the only term that could clearly describe Hei-ying's condition, "I don't think he is . . ."

The jaded eyes slid shut as the dark figure began to laugh quietly, as he paced further away slowly. 

". . . *Sane* . . . anymore. . ."

The breakfast table was unbearably silent, as Hei-ying, Keroberos and Yue ate. Clow wasn't hungry so he settled instead for sipping some green tea. His mother had always found it to be very calming, and Clow could see why. The storm was still raging outside, and the three guardians had been locked up together for a week. Clow sighed, as he tried and failed to make eye contact with Yukito. 

Yue had disappeared, one entire week and not so much as a peep from Yue. Keroberos wasn't much better; the lion rarely used his false form. He looked like he was in a permanent state of readiness. Hei-ying was the only one that would meet Clow's gaze and Clow wasn't so sure that this was a good thing. Hei-ying's little traits were starting to get out of hand, and nearly every night he would slip into Clow's bedroom. The visits themselves didn't last for very long, but it was the fact Hei-ying would do nothing but stare, that was starting to disturb Clow. Hei-ying was still . . . obsessed with Clow, and his obedience spell was becoming twisted and distorted. There were aspects of it that Hei-ying took too seriously. 

The house was silent again, and Clow had taken to his study to escape it. Escape Hei-ying's unblinking stares, Keroberos' vigilant growls and Yukito. The small false form had been intended to look happy, and it was disturbing to see the small amber eyes hold such grief. Yukito looked like he was grieving, and Clow didn't know why.

As Hei-ying stood and started to clear away the breakfast plates, Clow made his decision. "Yukito?" Yukito looked up slightly, not quite meeting Clow's eyes; he nodded to indicate he had heard. Clow pursed his lips together and stood, "I would like to talk to you in my study please."

Yukito stood, as did Keroberos. There was a quick glow of light and Keroberos' false form appeared, he landed softly on Yukito shoulder, and whispered something into his ear. Yukito's face displayed a quick flash of surprise before nodding sadly. 

Clow noted this; he had started to watch Hei-ying and Keroberos' motions towards Yukito whenever he was around. Perhaps Keroberos was whispering a threat into his small ear, or maybe a warning to keep the malicious triad out of Clow's attentions. Clow's eyes narrowed, he had had enough, he wanted to know and Yukito was going to tell him.

"Please close the door . . ." Clow took off his robes' outer coat and slung it over the back of his desk's chair. Yukito nodded again, and quietly pulled the large wood door shut. Clow sighed and moved forward. He knelt before his moon guardian's false form. He raised a hand to Yukito's cheek, "Please my snowy one . . . tell me . . . what's wrong?"

Yukito held his gaze for a few seconds before shuffling backward; he lifted his chin out of Clow's grasp and remained silent. Clow sighed, "Then I apologise for having to do this to you . . . there is something wrong, and you are trying to hide it from me . . . Yue . . ." Yukito's eyes widened, and then creased with anguish.

"Please don't." Yukito pleaded, "Don't do this . . ."

"I need to know what is wrong . . . why are you hiding from me?"

"I'm not . . . I just thought . . ."

"What?"

". . .That you'd like to see more of the snow rabbit." Yue was lying again, Clow drew a deep breath; it hurt to see that even here, in the place of his creation, Yue would find fear. 

"That isn't the truth, my snowy one . . . I give you one more chance to tell me or I will find out by myself." 

Yukito bit his lip, he could just tell Clow the truth, but then Hei-ying would do bad things to him again. Not to mention that Clow would get angry because Yue was incapable of taking his punishments properly. "That is the truth . . ." he murmured.

Clow closed his eyes and swallowed. He stood and nodded, "Very well . . ." he turned and walked over to his window seat. "Yue." He ordered softly, "Return to your true form."

There was a bright blue glow and Clow turned to see the transformation take place. Now he would find out what new horror Yue's tormentor had bestowed on him. As Yue's large wings peeled back slowly, Clow realised what Yue was hiding. 

The weeping angel had a fringe, short and uneven, that partially covered one eye. Yue now had a similar fringe, although one half completely covered his right eye. Yue raised his head miserably, Clow knew now, his hair, the hair Clow had care for every night since his creation, the beautiful gift that Yue adored was torn and haphazardly cut into a hideous fringe. Yue swallowed as his mind scrambled to come up with yet another lie to explain away his new hairstyle. "I . . . I . . . didn't want to look so much like I used to so I . . ."

Clow step forward and dropped to his knees, he wasn't listening to Yue's bumbling attempt to get his brother off the hook. He briefly examined the hair, much of the cut parts were too straight to have been done by claws. He stood and brushed past Yue and stormed out of the door.

"Clow's going to realise it was you, Hei-ying." Keroberos floated in the doorway as Hei-ying silently washed the dishes, he hadn't said much since Keroberos had rescued Yue from his grasp. Keroberos was convinced now, Hei-ying had truly lost it, he didn't even look worried that Clow was obviously going to realise that Yue's new haircut had been the product of Hei-ying's favourite scissors, rather than Keroberos' clumsy claws. 

"Who would he believe? That brat or me, his most perfect creation?" Hei-ying spat. 

"In this case . . . Yue." Hei-ying spun as Clow stood in the doorway of the kitchen, he turned slightly to face Keroberos, "Please go to my study and comfort the little moonbeam . . . inform him that I will fix his hair later."

"Yes Clow." Keroberos didn't show his glee, either Yue had given in as Keroberos had suggested before Clow called him to his study, or Clow had ordered Yue to return. Either way, Clow would finally realise the truth about Hei-ying and do something about him. 

He fluttered to the entrance hall, and changed to his true form, he flew up the stairs quickly; Yue's suffering would soon be over. He smiled, the ever happy, ever smiling Yue would return and then they would be able to play again. Making as much noise as they wanted in the hallways, without the ever present fear of Hei-ying suddenly throwing a fit of rage.

"Why did you do this?"

Clow remained in the doorway as he watched Hei-ying continue to wash the plates. Hei-ying didn't answer, stacking the plates they had used carefully, " . . .Or don't you have an answer?"

Hei-ying threw a sidelong glance at him, Clow laughed mirthlessly, "Of course you have an answer, you always have an answer."

Hei-ying still declined to answer, as he picked up a drying clothe and began to dry each plate slowly and carefully. Clow stepped forward, "Why did you do this to Yue?"

That was what did it; Hei-ying's face screwed up in uncontained rage and smashed a plate hard against the edge of the counter. "It's always about Yue, Yue, *Yue* isn't it?" Hei-ying hissed, "I am your first creation, you took *me* as your first lover but now I am *nothing* to you compared to your precious little moonbeam?!"

Clow started to shake with anger as well, "I thought you understood . . . what occurred between us was a mistake! An atrocious mistake, and I'm sorry that I ever *touched* you!"

Hei-ying's eyes widened, "What happened between us was meant to be! You said the visions made you do it!"

Clow tried to keep his voice below a yell, "I did say that, but that was because I was angry at the visions . . . they had shown me a time when I would be in love with either you or Yue . . . but that time would be during a storm, a horrific storm, and that one of you would come to me . . . the night I first . . ." 

"The night you first took me for your lover was clear of . . ." Hei-ying began to sink to the floor; Clow had disregarded the advice of the visions, and in his fury, had taken Hei-ying. Hei-ying pressed his hand against his forehead, pain beginning to set in. His broken soul, his broken mind, and now his broken heart twisted devastatingly. "You *ignored* the visions and took me out of revenge . . . not love . . . you've . . . never loved me . . ."

"No . . ." Clow dropped to his knees near Hei-ying and tried to wrap his arms around his black haired angel, "I have loved you and despite your behaviour against Yue . . . I still love you . . . but I realise now, which of you I am meant to be with . . . the angel from my vision had a short fringe . . . Yue now has that fringe . . ."

Hei-ying's head snapped towards Clow, he pushed his master away in disgust; he had helped Clow find his true love? And that true love was Yue?! 

"NO!"

 Hei-ying stood and ran to the drying board, he pulled a knife from the drying rack and hacked at his hair. 

"Hei-ying!" Clow jumped to his feet, thinking Hei-ying was going to kill himself. 

The knife soon clattered to the floor, and Hei-ying turned. "Now Clow . . ." he said emotionlessly, "Which of us is the angel from your vision . . .?"

Clow's mouth hung open with horror, Hei-ying had given himself the same haircut as the angel from the vision.

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Anne Robison: who needs to pay a visit to the loony bin? Who's sanity has shipped with the Titanitic? Please place your votes now.

Big Voice Over Guy: Keroberos has proven to be the strongest link in this round by saving Yue from an untimely death. . . but for how long can he be Yue's protector? Hei-ying and Clow have tied for the weakest link, Hei-ying being insane and all and Clow for just being stupid enough to tell Hei-ying about loving Yue . . . but will the votes reflect the facts?

Anne: your time is up. Please cast your votes.

Clow: DrM.

Kero: DrM

Yue: DrM

Hei-ying: Yue AND DrM

DrM: hey!

Clow: Hei-ying's insane!

Hei-ying: I'm insane?!

Kero: he's insane!

Yue: MY FREAKING HAIR?! WHAT IS YOUR OBSESSION WITH EXPLAINING MY FRINGE?!?!?!

DrM: your hair intrigues me. . . anyway. . . Hei-ying's the one you want!! [Turns to readers] I'm really excited, cause the next chapters are actually the first few chapters I wrote for this, and I consider them to be some of my favourite scenes!!! I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoyed writing 'em!! As always please R&R, it means a lot to me to know that you have at least some emotional reaction to what you have read. Please? Thank you!!


	18. Regrets

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me! Onegai means 'please'. . . and the longer form I have used here is a more formal term. . . Kisama is a rube form of 'Why, you!' and Damare, again, is a rude form of 'Stop that!' or Possibly 'Shut Up!' I've seen it translated as both.

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Seventeen: Regrets

[Gotta put a warning with this one. . . it's a little dark, sorta akin to 'let me tell you a story' dark. There's themes of attempted murder, strong language, and some serious stuff so if you ain't got the stomach don't read it, if you do. . . please read on. But I don't want any flames ok, not unless they are constructive, got that? Good! Please R&R!]

Clow sat back in his chair. He regretted everything.

The cards . . . he wished he never created.

Yue . . . he wished the child wasn't here.

Keroberos . . . he wished the lion didn't have to be so vigilant all the time.

Hei-ying . . . he'd come to loathe.

It was all a horrible mistake . . . one that he no longer had the power to correct. He sighed and sank lower into his chair.

"Reed . . . Reed . . . What are you going to do now?" He looked up and out of the window. It was snowing; the icy cold wind blowing hard, the snowstorm was very powerful. "What am I going to do?"

His eyes widened as something golden and scarlet fell past the window. Clow Reed rushed to the window, and flung it open.

Keroberos plummeted unconscious or dead to the ground. "WINDY!!" Clow's staff immediately appeared, "Stop his fall! NOW!!"

The Windy swept out the window and rushed down as fast as it could, but it couldn't catch up with the bleeding lion. "Keroberos!" Clow whispered as the golden lion hit the snow bank hard. Clow was about to summon Fly to take him straight to the fallen guardian when a piecing scream rang thru the halls. 

"LEEET MEEEE GOOO!!"

"Yue?!" Clow called back. Clow turned and ran down the halls, another scream issued forth, "Yue! I'm coming!" Clow pulled another card from his deep robes, "Dash!"

Clow sped up the stairs, the screaming got more incessant. Something out of the corner of his eye made Clow stop, the window. There was something outside the window. The glass glowed then shattered as Keroberos' fire attack blew it apart. "Yue!" The bloodied guardian crawled thru the window, and limped towards Clow, "Clow! Hei-ying's got him!!" Keroberos breathlessly explained. "Hei-ying's got Yue!!"

"Keroberos! Help me! He's hurting me!" Screamed Yue's panic-stricken voice.  Clow spun and called out "Fly!"

He flew up the stairs, Yue's voice still ringing out strongly, "You're hurting me! Let me go!" Clow closed his eyes, he didn't want to hear this, Yue was starting to beg for his life. "Please let me GOOO!"

Keroberos growled behind him, and flew much faster than Clow's winged staff. Clow followed as Kero turned a corner, the wounded lion knew where they were. Clow cursed himself for having such a large house, Hei-ying had lived here for nearly ten years now, and he knew ever nook and cranny. "Somebody help me!! Please! Please help me!"

"Hei-ying!" Keroberos roared, "I'll kill you for this!"

Clow prayed that his youngest guardian would survive the latest attack. 

"CLOOOOOW!! Please help me! Please!" Yue sobbed. "Onegaishimasu!! I beg of you!! Please stop hurting me!"

Kero swooped into a room, and stopped suddenly, "They're gone! . . . Clow! They're gone . . ." 

Clow stared in horror; it was Yue's bedroom. The child's toys were scattered, the bed unmade. The room was splattered with blood; Yue's white silken curtains, ones Clow had handmade himself with tiny moons and snowflakes, were stain with blood. The window was still wide open and snow had started to drift in. Yue screamed out again. 

"Hei-ying! Where are you?!" Keroberos scrambled on the floor and took flight again, "You bastard!! I'll fucking kill you!"

"CLOOOOOOOOW! KEERROOOBEEROOOOSS!!! HELP ME!!" Begged Yue, "Somebody please! Onegaishimasu!" 

"YUE!! We're coming!! Keep calling!" Keroberos shouted, "We're coming!"

"NO!" Yue screamed; his pain brought his voice to new heights. "ONEGAI!! ONEGAI!!  NOOOO!!"

"Kisama!" Hei-ying's voice now sounded, he yelled in anger and pain, "Damare!" 

"Hei-ying! You coward!" Hollered Keroberos. "Let him go!"

Clow remained silent, he was going into a state of shock, Yue's voice was the only thing he could hear, but where was he? The powerful magician fought to keep his calm, and listened for indications where Hei-ying had taken him. He and Keroberos flew out into the stair well and stopped. There were so many corridors; so many places Hei-ying could have taken him. //Yue . . . where are you . . .? //

"THE ROOF!!" Screamed Yue. "He's taking me to the roof! Clow, Keroberos, ONEGAI!! He's hurting me! Onegaishimasu Hei-ying-sama!" Clow grimaced to hear Yue call Hei-ying by such respect. "Onegaishimasu!" Keroberos roared; his anger now surpassing the pain his body had, "ONEGAISH ---"

Silence. Yue stopped calling.

"Yue?" whispered Keroberos, the bloodied lion squeezed his eyes shut and roared. "YUUUUEEE!!!"

"Keroberos! This way!" Clow changed direction and flew straight toward the window. Keroberos over took the magician and blew the window out.

Sparkling shards of multi-coloured glass hurtled to the ground as Clow Reed and his sun guardian made their way to the snow-covered roof. Clow grasped his golden staff harder and willed his magic to go faster. //Just a bit faster, please let me be there in time, please let him be alright, let him live . . .// Clow prayed to every god that he'd been brought up to believe in, and then some that he didn't, // I'll give anything! My life, my magic, my soul! Just let my little moonbeam live! //

"Clow!" His dark eyes snapped open at Keroberos' call. Time seemed to slow as he turned his attention to what Keroberos was staring at.

"Yue . . ." Clow whispered, as the boy hurtled toward him. Hei-ying had thrown him off the roof, as he had Keroberos. Time began again as Yue's body plunged between them, for a few seconds Clow could do nothing, but watch. He froze, no magic he had would ever stop the boy's fall, not even Keroberos could stop his fall.

"Yue!" Cried Keroberos, he too knew he could never catch him. His head snapped upwards as he roared, "I *will* avenge you!" 

Clow could do nothing, //Nothing I do will save him . . .// he thought, //Nothing I do will save him, there isn't enough time . . . not enough time . . . Time . . . Time? . . .// "TIME CARD!" It would give him a few seconds at most, but it would be enough . . . he hoped. "FREEZE THIS MOMENT! TAKE MY GUARDIANS WITHIN THOU!" He bellowed above the harsh wind. "RELEASE!!"

The elderly card swept the landscape into it's power, Clow looped over and flew downwards as fast as he could. His tiny angel boy was suspended in his fall, arms and legs held up lifelessly, hair obscuring most of his face, but Clow could see his eyes. They were closed, and peaceful. //He's dead . . .// a small, defeated voice told Clow. "No!" Clow cried, "No! No! NO! NO! NOOOO!"

He could feel the Time card weaken, and give way. He was just a few more meters away from him. The Time struggled to let the boy be the last part of it's frozen moment, as it's magic hold unravelled. Clow suddenly could hear Keroberos' roars as he charged after Hei-ying. Clow's hair streamed away, it has broken loose of it's customary ties, his spectacles slipped off and whipped behind him still attached to their lace.

Time finally gave way, letting Yue go, and the boy returned to his plummet. Just a few more feet, Clow let one hand reach out in front of him; he strained to catch his moonchild. His eyes started to water, a mix of the rushing air and tears, Yue was still out of reach . . . and unlike Keroberos, there was no soft snow bank to cushion his fall.

"YUE!!" Clow almost sobbed, he was going to lose him. The child's pale hand was still out of reach, Clow damned himself, damned the cards, damned Keroberos, damned Hei-ying, AND DAMNED EVERYTHING!

Yue's eyes snapped open, the beautiful orbs widened as he realised what was going on. "Clow!"

"YUE!! Your wings!" There wasn't enough time; not enough time for Yue to call his wings back into existence, Clow knew, but he had to try everything he could. Their eyes were locked, as Clow raced downwards, and Yue fell.

Just a few meters away, Yue's fearful amethyst eyes slid shut; he knew his death drew closer. "Clow . . ." he murmured, tears falling from his face, and stands of blood-caked hair whipping about his face. The child stretched his hands as hard as he could towards his creator. "Onegai . . ."

"No . . . Yue . . ." Clow's eyes fell shut as he pulled up, he couldn't save the boy and the Fly card wouldn't let him fly into the harsh earth after him. "NO!"

The Fly took him to a safer height, and hovered, it's Master sobbing into his hands. The wind blustered around them, and Clow was uncaring of it. Flakes of snow stuck into his raven black hair, as he shook with sorrow, with anger, with a sadness deeper than he had ever known. He, Clow Reed, the world's most powerful magician, was incapable of saving a single little boy. His hands slid down his face to cover his mouth, he felt sick. This was all his fault. He looked up into the sky above him. The snow spiralled down beautifully, the stars glowed peacefully, and the midnight sky was held them all. The moon, having just been reborn, hung there. That was why Yue was over powered by Hei-ying, the moon was still in it's earliest stages. He hadn't had a chance.

The icy cold wind blew against his back and he shivered, it pushed him strongly. Still staring at the moon, Clow reached into his pocket to pull Windy out. He was going to order it to cease the cold wind. He frowned when his hand came up empty, //Of course// he realised, he hadn't recalled it after sending it after Keroberos. 

"Windy . . ." he said quietly, knowing the gentle card would hear him no matter what, he licked his dry lips,  " . . . Return."

The beautiful woman swirled and gathered in front of her Master, but didn't return to her card form. Clow gazed at her, and she gazed back. Clow frowned, "Return."

The Windy dipped her head and shook it. She pulled her lower dress up, as it responded she held her arms out to Clow. 

There, encased in her soft warm folds, the Windy held Yue. If she returned to her card form, she would have to drop him. Clow reached out and stoked the boy's sleeping face; he glanced up at the Windy, which smiled. 

"Thank you. . ." Clow murmured. His face hardened as he remembered the cause of Yue's near-death. "Care for him." He ordered and turned to fly back to the rooftop.

The Windy nodded and cradled the tiny boy in her arms, he whimpered quietly, and she took him to the Master's study.

Keroberos was unaware that his youngest brother had been saved. He was only concerned with Hei-ying. The ice-cold wind whipped about them as the two brothers faced off. Hei-ying's raven black hair thrashed about his face, but that didn't hide the fact he was bleeding from somewhere on his head.

Keroberos smiled ferociously, the tiny boy had struggled against him and had hurt the cruel monster. //Good boy! Now I will finish him!//

"What's the matter, little sunbeam?" Taunted Hei-ying, "Didn't I wound you enough?" He drew his hand up, his jaded dagger appeared. It glowed and he threw it at the golden lion. Keroberos ducked out of the way as the jaded dagger became a swarm of sharp thorns. Keroberos grew his wings and lifted himself into the air, "I swore to you, if you ever harmed him, I'd kill you!" He spat a fireball at the murderous beast. 

Hei-ying laughed and grew his own wings; he lifted off into the air just as Keroberos' fireball hit the rooftop. "Try and keep your promises!" He called, "Isn't that what you kept telling that brat?!" He spread his arms and three daggers appeared. Hei-ying threw his arms forward and his attack threw itself forward at Keroberos. Keroberos flew out of the way, but was too slow to miss one thorn; it ripped right threw his wing. "ARGAAH!"  He roared as his damaged wing forced him down.

Hei-ying landed, his pale feet settling softly in the snow. The jade stones on his robes' feet straps glinted coldly as he stalked slowly towards Keroberos. The lion struggled to stand, as Hei-ying approached.

"Always keep your promises, Yue" he hissed mockingly, "Always eat your greens Yue!" The dark angel crouched beside Keroberos and hauled the lion up by the scruff of his neck. "It's so nice, Yue! I'll treasure it forever!" He raised Keroberos' head sharply, and brought it down just as harshly, cracking Keroberos' jaw hard on the cold tiles, "Such a pretty painting, Yue! I'll hang it on my mantelpiece." Hei-ying yanked him closer, to hiss in his ear, "Isn't it nicer now it's just the two of us, Keroberos? Just like the old times? No more 'Be quiet you two, Yue's trying to nap' . . . none of that anymore . . ." 

Keroberos struggled to stay awake, the cold and the pain crept in on his vision. "You killed him . . ." he growled weakly.

"Didn't I just?" Hei-ying laughed, "And do know what the funny thing is? The snowy one . . . is now *one* with the snow!"

"NO!" Kero summoned the last vestiges of his strength, and slashed at Hei-ying's face. He extended his razor-sharp claws, and tried to rip the skin from Hei-ying's very skull. "I hate you! You bastard! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! He was only a child! A fucking child! What the hell did he ever do you?!"

A sharp explosion of magic under his stomach blew him off Hei-ying. As Keroberos skidded along the roof, Hei-ying lifted himself off the snow.  He put a hand over his face, Yue had already claimed his ear, and now Keroberos had claimed one of his prized jade eyes. He spread his wings and lifted himself off the roof. His black robes thrashed around him in the cold wind, as he spread his arms once more. As the thorny jaded daggers materialized, Hei-ying glowered down at Keroberos. "I'll tell you what he did . . . he dared to try and make Clow love him more than me."

As Hei-ying threw his arms forward, Keroberos closed his eyes. He was too weak to move his wings to protect him. //My little moonbeam . . . I'm sorry, I'm too weak to revenge you . . . but have no fear, we shall meet soon.// 

When no thorns pieced his body, Keroberos opened his eyes. A heavy thud nearby caused him to raise his head. Hei-ying lay in a deep slumber in the snow. The Sleep card bowed graciously to Clow as she returned to her card form. Clow ignored the courtesy, as he dismounted from his staff, the Fly card instantly disappearing. His study's slippers crunched the snow as he walked over Hei-ying and approached Keroberos. "Keroberos? Are you all right?"

"I will be." The lion growled weakly, "Once I have avenged Yue." Clow's sun guardian tried to raise himself, but Clow rested his pale hand on the revengeful lion's head.

"I will take care of him."

"Clow, with all due respect," Keroberos could barely contain his rage, "I *swore* I would kill him, if he harmed the boy. I *will* make good on my oath!"

"Lock card; bind Hei-ying. Freeze card; freeze him in a block of ice. Float card; take him to his room." Clow ordered emotionlessly. As the three cards carried out Clow's instructions, Clow turned his attention back onto Keroberos. "Can you turn back to your false form? I will carry you back to the study and tend for you there."

"Clow!" Kero protested, "The bastard killed Yue!"

Clow pulled out the fly card; he threw it in front of him. As the wind carried it back to him, he tapped it with his staff. The gilded wand instantly grew wings. As he mounted it, he looked back at Keroberos. 

"Yue is safe."

When Yue opened his eyes, he wasn't in the Very Beautiful Place Keroberos had described when Yue asked him what happened when mortals died. Keroberos said you couldn't feel any pain in the Very Beautiful Place. Yue could. His legs hurt, his arms, his back, everything, and everywhere Hei-ying had stabbed the shiny silver scissors. Yue wondered briefly if Hei-ying had really succeeded in his threat. With every cut, his eldest brother had spat that he was going to send Yue to Hell. Yue moaned quietly, Hell was the Very Awful Place that Keroberos said where all the bad people had to go. //Am I There?// he wondered.

The panelled wood ceiling flickered with the light from a roaring fire, Yue continued to gaze at it, it looked very much like the Master's study's ceiling.

A beautiful woman came into view. "Windy . . ." Yue identified her with a whisper. The magical illusion nodded kindly, and helped him to sit up. The pain in his back made him wince. "Ow!" His face creased in the pain. 

The gentle woman reached out, and a swirl of her wind pooled in front of him. The swirl morphed into her hands, and cupped in her palms was some water. She held it to his face, bidding him to drink. 

 The boy's eyes slid shut as she wrapped herself around him like a blanket. She pulled him into the air and cradled him gently. She was thankful that the Master had forgotten to restore her to her card form. She wouldn't have been able to catch him, she had failed to catch Keroberos but he had survived his fall . . . this boy would never have. She smiled slightly, it was hard to believe that one day, this tiny sweet hearted boy would ever grow up to be the Judgement Maker. He snuggled into her bosom as he started to weep quietly. "Windy, it hurts, why did he do this to me? What did I do?"

She laid a kiss upon his pale forehead, unable to answer his questions. She wrapped herself gently tighter about his body, warm and soft, willing her protection on him.

The window swung open again and Keroberos' false form flew thru, a beat of his wings later, his true form appeared. "Yue!" He called, and then collapsed onto the ground. The Windy reached out her arm and swept the large lion up into her arms, she hauled him up to lie besides Yue.

The lion was splattered with blood; a large rip crossed his face, causing one of his eyes to close slightly. "Yue?" he asked, unconcerned about his own injuries, interested only in the boy he thought he had failed.

When Clow dismounted his staff and stepped through the window, he found Windy cradling two of his guardians gently. Keroberos had wrapped a protective paw around Yue, and the two were now sound asleep. Clow may have been exhausted, and wet, and freezing cold, but he smiled at the sight. His cards had done what they had been created to do; Yue was safe and smiling under the warmth of Keroberos' protection. 

There was only one thing he regretted now.

Hei-ying.

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

[Silence, all stare at DrM]

DrM: Nani?

Clow: Where the hell did *that* come from? [Re-reads chapter, cringes] How much pain did you dish out there?!

Kero: [Winces] Oh, come on . . . [Reads] *Ouch!* There was no need for that jaw thing!

Yue: [Grimaces] Whatever possessed you to write that?!

DrM: Let's just say, I have vivid nightmares about large houses, chases, falling and scissors . . . I watched entirely too much of Batman Returns [Tim Burton RULES!!] . . . I played 'Hindi Sad Diamonds' from the Moulin Rouge OST once too often . . . and . . . It needed to be done.

Clow: [Turns to reader] I think it might be a good idea to review . . . you know . . . keep her happy so she doesn't . . . you know . . . kill anyone off . . . [Glances at DrM as she nurses Hei-ying back to health] 

DrM: Poor baby . . . I wuv you!

Clow: [Gulps and makes 'she's crazy' motions against head] . . . or allow a certain someone to cause anymore trouble . . . 


	19. Remembrances

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Eighteen: Remembrances 

Yue tiptoed up to Clow's upstairs study, it had been a week since Hei-ying had come into his room and tried to . . . Yue gulped, he didn't want to even think about what Hei-ying had wanted to do to him. In fact, he didn't even want to think about Hei-ying at all, every time Yue went to bed, he would wake up after seeing Hei-ying's glowing jade eyes coming to get him. Yue shivered and leant closer to the door. Clow and Keroberos had been in there for hours after Keroberos had asked what Clow had planned to do with Hei-ying. They had been in Keroberos' room, when Keroberos suddenly turned to Clow and said, "And now for Hei-ying . . . What do you plan on doing with that--?" But Clow had stopped him, asked him to accompany him to his study. He paused in the door, and asked Yue to stay in Keroberos' room and not to leave. Yue nodded, and lay back down, wondering what they were going to talk about. He also started to think about his room, he knew he'd never see it again. 

Four days after Hei-ying did the Bad Thing to him, Clow had asked Yue to go in there and get his most treasured possession. Yue had barely opened his eyes as he rushed in, grabbed the earring that contained his false form and the ribbon of his ice bow, and then ran back out. Once Yue was out the room, Clow asked if that was all he wanted from the room. Yue had nodded. Desperately wishing he were telling the truth, Yue lied and said it was all he wanted. Clow understood of course, Yue loved his toys, loved everything in that room, but Hei-ying had left them all stained, tainted so that if Yue ever saw them, he would never be able to forget the Bad Thing. Clow stood outside the room, and asked Keroberos to take Yue to his own room. 

What Yue hadn't seen were the silent tears running down Clow's face as he took one last look around the space that was his child's room. It had been too violated; the site of too much horror for Clow to allow Yue to ever set foot in the room again. Everything in this room Clow had handmade or created himself, and now . . . Yue, *nobody*, would ever see the inside of this raped room again. Yue's blood tainted every stuffed toy, the curtains, the bed, Keroberos' stained the floor, the window . . . Clow pulled the door closed, sealing it with a spell that even he would be hard put to undo. Clow simply couldn't destroy the room, he couldn't. It would feel like he was completing Hei-ying's murder, by destroying this room, he would have felt like he was giving in, and letting go of Yue forever.

In a way, Hei-ying had already seen to this, Yue had started to deny that the whole thing had happened, insisting that his injuries were a product of his clumsy self. Clow and Keroberos couldn't understand it, Yue simply refused to accept that someone had actually done this to him, and was convinced it was all his own fault. He favoured his false form, but was too weak to keep the false form in existence for very long. Yukito was also part of this façade; he never admitted he was in any pain. Keroberos was a bit disturbed when Yue started to call his false form by name rather than calling it his false form. Even more so when Yukito seemed to deny Yue even existed.

 He had gone straight to Clow, and aired his fears, but Clow was sinking into a depression again. Keroberos and Clow argued almost daily now, Keroberos asking Clow to help Yue, prevent him from believing his fantasies that Yue and Yukito was separate but Clow didn't have the heart to make Yue face reality. To force Yue to face reality was to make Yue face the fact someone had tried to murder him, and that would require Clow to tell Yue, to admit that his creator was a failure. 

Yue pressed his bandaged hands against the door and closed his eyes as he tried to make out what was being said. Clow and Keroberos were arguing, or rather Keroberos was . . . Clow's voice was soft, too soft for him to make out words, while Keroberos reacted to each word with more anger than before. 

"You can't be serious!" Keroberos roared. "The man's a fucking maniac!" Yue strained to hear Clow's response. He could imagine the scene; Keroberos would be stood in front of Clow, in his full form, while Clow would be slouched in his chair. Not quite meeting Keroberos' golden eyes. Clow was sad about something. He always seemed to be sad nowadays, as if he hated his life so much that he wished it would all disappear. This made Yue sad too. He thought he had been a good boy, he thought he made Clow happy. He always used seemed happy when Yue showed him his pictures.

Yue turned away from the door and limped down the corridor. The injuries he had were still painful, despite the care Clow and Keroberos had given him. Maybe, his eldest brother had been right . . . maybe Yue's creation had brought hell to their family. Yue sniffed, as the tears rolled down his young cheeks. Perhaps, if Yue went away, if he tried to be Yukito all the time, if being a human like Clow . . . perhaps Yukito would make Clow happy again. He paused as he past the locked room. He was in there. Clow had locked Him in there. 

"I know you're there."

 Yue jumped in shock as his eldest brother called to him through the door. Yue knew he should have left, just left and walked on but he stayed. He sat down, and stared up at the large black door, as his brother continued to speak. 

Yue listening, like every good boy should . . .

Today was the day.

Clow had announced this fact during breakfast; he turned to Keroberos and said simply, "Today is the day" 

"The day for what?" Asked Yukito, it was now precisely two weeks since the Bad Thing had happened. Keroberos looked at Yukito with sad eyes, and then nodded at Clow. Then the two resumed their eating quietly, leaving Yukito in the dark as to what today was the day for.

Keroberos lapped at his oversized teacup thoughtfully, Yukito was a constant now, Yue had disappeared a week ago. Keroberos wished he knew why, he knew that It had had something to do with it. He had stalked out of Clow's study, and had gone looking for Yue when he found his youngest brother's false form sitting in front of the door to the room that had become It's prison, listening faithfully. Keroberos frowned slightly; he couldn't even bring himself to think about It anymore. 

But something It had said had made Yue go, and Yukito the prefect human take up permanent residence. Clow still refused to do anything about it, believing that the . . . the . . . Keroberos struggled to name this thing Yue had entered into, semi regression, this denial of reality was ultimately good for Yue. If Yue didn't remember about It, then It had failed in his attempted to destroy Yue. Keroberos didn't believe a word of it, but Clow had asked him not to try and make Yue remember. 

"Perhaps if Yue dealt with it in his own way . . ." Clow had suggested, hesitant to lose what little of Yue he had left. The happy moonchild that had once been Yue had left, and the only suggestion that he ever existed was Yukito. Yukito was just as full of energy, full of laughter and smiles as Yue had been. Clow would let him play in his study, just so he could close his eyes and pretend that he was listening to Yue play. 

Once breakfast was finished, Clow cleared away the plates; Keroberos and Yukito sat quietly on the first few steps leading to Clow's study. 

"What is so special about today, Keroberos?" 

Keroberos looked up the stairs solemnly; "Today is the end of a horrible nightmare, Yue."

"Yue?" Yukito blinked, "Who's Yue?"

Keroberos opened his mouth, he was going to yell, 'It's you! The real you! My real brother! I want him back!' but he . . . he couldn't. He didn't want to shatter Yue completely. "It's nothing, Yukito . . . just me . . ."

Yukito giggled, and petted Keroberos, "You're funny, Keroberos." 

Clow swept into the entrance hall, "I'm ready . . ." he murmured.

Keroberos looked at Yukito once again, and stood, "As are we." He nodded. 

Clow sighed, and mounted the stairs, "Keroberos . . . I . . . I don't want Yukito to—"

"I won't let him." Keroberos snapped. Clow didn't even turn at Keroberos' harsh voice; he just continued to climb the stairs.

Once he was halfway, he paused. Once again, he stood halfway between the ground floor and the third floor. Once again he had two choices, he could go and finish Hei-ying or he could return down the stairs, and accept the Yue was never going to return. He snorted with cynical mirth, now he knew why there was only one angel when he told Keroberos and the weeping angel that he was going to die, it was because Clow was either seal Hei-ying away . . . or go downstairs and allow Yue to remain hidden in his false form for the rest of his life. Clow suddenly wished Marcibay Hilligans was here. He put his hands on the railings and stared at the old, worn magic circle that was still engraved into the floor. 

What was he supposed to do? One direction meant he'd lose one of his creations; Yue or Hei-ying, one of them would be effectively dead for the rest of his life. One of them bitterly hated the other, but Clow had been with that one for much longer. Hei-ying was his first creation, the one he had made love to for the first time, and the one that still loved him a lot. If Clow chose to destroy Yue, Clow would be certain that Hei-ying and he would become lovers again, that the angel of his visions was most certainly Hei-ying. 

But if he chose to destroy Hei-ying, Clow had to take the chance that he'd never see Yue again, that even if he did, there was always a possibility that Yue might one day turn insane just like Hei-ying. Clow squeezed his eyes shut, could he bear to let that happen?

"Clow . . ." Clow's eyes snapped open, Eriol was stood in front of him, floating in the air on a magic circle . . . Clow's eyes widened, it wasn't just any magic circle, it was his! 

"Eriol . . . that's my . . .!" Eriol looked down at his feet and smiled.

"I know . . ." Eriol lifted his head, and again Clow gasped, the impossible shadows had disappeared from Eriol's eyes and Clow could see Eriol's true face. He smiled, "And so do you . . . in my present life, my name is Eriol Hiirawagizawa . . . in my past . . ."

"I am Clow Reed . . ." Clow whispered with his reincarnation. "You're here to ensure I make the right decision?"

"No . . . I'm here to remind you of what you have seen over the years, who you have seen . . . to make you realise the right choice by yourself . . ." he looked down on Yukito, "It's already started . . . hasn't it?" 

"Will it change?" Clow demanded, "Will I ever see Yue again?"

Eriol closed his eyes and shook his head, "You will see Yue . . . but your little moonbeam is dead . . . he died a long time ago." 

Clow felt his eyes well up with tears, "Then my decision is made . . ." he turned to go down the stairs, he was going to gently put Yukito to sleep, in such a deep sleep that he would never wake up again. 

"Please don't." A girl's voice asked quietly, "Clow-sama, please allow Yue to survive." 

Clow turned again, the Cardcaptor. Her magic circle over lapped Eriol's, as she floated in the air next to him. She looked at Eriol hesitantly, Clow watched as his reincarnated self passed his hand over her face, taking the impossible shadows with his hand. She had emerald eyes; it suited her honey hair, Clow noted. "Eriol's told me the truth about these visions . . . or at least why I am meeting you today, my name is Sakura . . . I just want you to go the other way . . . walk *up* the stairs."

Clow smirked slightly at his reincarnated self, "You have told her some of what is to happen, but not all?"

"No . . . I haven't . . . but think about it, Clow . . . which have you seen with Sakura?"   

Clow stared at their overlapping magic circles as he thought. "The white haired angel . . ." he murmured, "I have seen Yue with her, every time."

Eriol nodded, "Then it is Yue who will survive your choice today." 

Clow glanced down at Yukito, "But you said my moonbeam is dead." 

Eriol's forehead creased in a pitying frown, "It is true that the Yue you and I will always remember is gone forever . . . but you have noticed it yourself, you can still see him through Yukito."

Sakura clasped her hands together, and stepped forward, "All I ask is that you don't take Yue away from me . . . I don't think Keroberos could take it if he suddenly lost Yue . . . I know I couldn't, and then there's my brother . . ."

"Sakura." Eriol shook his head disapprovingly, "Not now." 

"But—"

"No . . ." Eriol turned back to Clow, "Clow; it is time to make your decision. I cannot force you to do anything, but I think that if you truly look in your heart you will see the truth there." 

Sakura and Eriol faded, as Clow felt a sharp tug on his robes. "Clow? Clow! What is it?"

Clow looked down, Yukito was tugging at his robes, staring up at Clow unaware that with a single movement of his hand and a few quiet words Clow could just let him die. Die and not suffer this nightmare an hour longer. But Eriol was right, Clow stood and turned away from Yukito, he was right . . . Clow loved Yue and Yukito, even though he knew that the child's mind was too split to allow it to return his love. Clow looked at Keroberos who nodded, and silently gave him the support he needed. Clow looked up at the top of the stairs, and lifted his foot.

It was time, today was the day. 

Time to end this nightmare forever. 

Keroberos held Yukito back as they neared the top of the stairs just behind Clow, the strains of a song being sung floated down the corridor. Yukito stood on the top step, and listened. 

"Who's that singing?" He asked, deep inside of him, he knew . . . he knew it was Hei-ying. His eldest brother had been singing the same lullaby every time he sensed his younger brothers nearby.

"*No* one." Keroberos spat. "Come on, we can go play in the snow."

Yukito wouldn't budge, something made his feet stay put, and he wanted to see this. Whatever it was he wanted to see it. //. . .And show him he *failed* to kill me . . .// Yukito blinked at the strange thought. Keroberos pulled at the back of his clothes again, "Come on Yukito . . . let's just go outside, shall we?"

Yukito stared at Clow; he was nearing one of the only locked doors in the mansion. Clow had only locked four rooms in the house, one used to be someone called Mister Hilligans' room, the other three Keroberos had refused to tell him. Two were on the floor above, the sleeping floor, one had the engraving of a star and a rose on it and the other . . . the other had an engraving of the moon and a snowflake. This one room was the one Yukito felt the saddest about being locked. He didn't know what was in it, but for some reason, he would go up to that door and wish he could just go lie on the bed he knew was there, touch the curtains he knew had been made especially for him, play with the toys that Clow had made just for him . . . 

Yukito suddenly frowned, whatever it was that was in the last locked room, the thing responsible for the eerie lullaby that echoed down the hall, that thing was responsible for stealing that Moon and Snowflake room away. 

Keroberos growled slightly as he looked at Clow, "I can't get him to move!" 

Clow sighed, "Yukito . . . please . . . I don't want you to see this . . ." But still Yukito remained rooted to the floor. Clow exchange a single apologising look at Keroberos as he raised his hand. His hand glowed slightly and the lock on the door clicked open loudly. The door opened by itself, and the singing stopped. Clow didn't even move an eyelid as a black haired guardian stepped out. The deathly pale face slowly spread into a smile, one that was usually reserve for the complete innocent or the completely insane. Clow stepped back and started to walk down the corridor towards his study, knowing that Hei-ying would follow. 

He had no fear of the compulsively cleaned scissors Hei-ying was twirling in his hands; Clow had used the obedience spell for once, and had ordered Hei-ying not to use the scissors to kill Clow, Keroberos or Yue. Hei-ying, so binded by the spell, agreed immediately and settled instead to mechanically cutting his hair. Hei-ying no longer had the harshly chopped fringe he had given himself, his fringe was now sharp and sloping, one side was longer than the other, covering the damage Yue and Keroberos had inflicted on him. The other side was almost identical, only shorter revealing his single remaining jaded eye, and his only ear that held his jade earring. His robes were still impossible neat; the only imperfection was his large jade jewel that rested on his chest. The Freeze card had accidentally left a large crack right through the middle of the jade stone. 

Hei-ying walked silently behind Clow, who didn't even turn his head to look if Hei-ying was still following. He didn't need to, Hei-ying's single eye was staring at the back of his head just as unblinking as he used to when he had two eyes. Clow hadn't undone the damage his younger guardians had caused to Hei-ying simply because Clow didn't trust himself to face Hei-ying and not wring the life from his throat. 

Clow glanced at Keroberos, then at Yukito. He wondered what was going through the spilt mind of his youngest creation, as he walked past. He stopped briefly as he felt Hei-ying stop, Clow didn't turn; he continued to walk to his upstairs study, but he listened. Keroberos growled threateningly, "Keep away from him . . ."

Hei-ying stared at Yue, his single eye wide with the virtuousness that insanity brought with it. "Little sunbeam . . ." Hei-ying began to sing, "Little moonbeam . . ." he sank to kneel in front of Yukito " . . . Where are you? 'Cause when the bough breaks the cradle will fall . . . and down will come moonbeam . . . Keroberos . . . and all . . ." Hei-ying leant forward and placed a soft kiss on Yukito's pale forehead. His single eye closed, lips still close to Yukito's skin, Hei-ying breathed, " . . .Yue . . ."

As the transformation took place quietly, Hei-ying sat back on his heels. He folded his hands over the silver scissors, and waited for Yue to open his eyes. Keroberos stared at him, "Yue, let's just go . . . there's so much snow outside . . ."

But Yue ignored him; his amethyst eyes were firmly locked with Hei-ying. "This is the End . . ." he whispered, "I am Yue . . . the Judge . . ."

Hei-ying smiled, "Indeed."

He raised the silver scissor and picked up the small plait that lay over his shoulder. Hei-ying cut it off just behind his ear. Raising the severed plait in the air, he held his other hand out for Yue's small hand. Still not breaking eye contact, Hei-ying coiled the detached hair neatly in Yue's hand.

 "Remember me . . ."

They stared at each other as if entranced as Yue whispered, ". . . I will remember you . . ."

He closed Yue's hand around the shiny black hair, and raised his hands and the scissors to cut off the identical plait that fell over Yue's shoulder, he gave this to Yue and held out his hand expectantly. Yue didn't blink as he repeated Hei-ying's motions. As soon as Yue's small white hand closed Hei-ying's deathly pale hand over the silken white plait, Hei-ying smiled at Yue.

 ". . . And I will remember you . . ." 

Their secret pack was sealed as Yue whispered his echo, " . . . Remember me."

Hei-ying stood and continued his walk to Clow's study. Clow stared past him, still not looking into the jade eyes that some how knew what Clow was about to do but gave the impression that Hei-ying didn't have a clue. 

Hei-ying paused again at the open doorway of the study, "And Keroberos . . .?" he smiled over his shoulder, "I suggest you keep an eye on our little moonbeam . . . because . . ." he turned and hissed quietly, "He's just like me . . . just like Clow created him to be . . ." he spoke to Clow over his shoulder, "Isn't that what you said, Clow? 'That I thought that you would like to have someone just like you . . .' Yue is just. Like. Me." Hei-ying smiled, "Just like me . . . and one day, you'll see . . . I've seen in my mind, one day . . . he will *be* just . . . like . . . me . . ." Hei-ying didn't blink as he turned and walked into the study. Clow stared at Keroberos and Yue for a few seconds before following Hei-ying into the room. 

Hei-ying stood in the centre of the study, as he had done so many times before. "So, what new lesson will you teach me, Clow? Hmmm . . .? What new piece of advice should I tell the Cardcaptor?"

Clow was silent as he moved past Hei-ying; he strode over to his desk and picked up a book. Hei-ying stared at it; it was in Clow's customary colours and for a few seconds Hei-ying could have mistaken it for the Clow book. Clow remained silent as he placed the book on the floor in front of his eldest creation. Hei-ying stared at the book; it held his name on it. The book of Hei-ying the adviser, destined for the future generations of the Li clan of china. The book had a seal placed on it, and Hei-ying knew that this was his final resting place. He watched as the seal's lock snapped open. 

A single white card floated out of the hollowed out book, Clow had created a new card, fashioned in the same sense as the Clow cards. As it floated in front of Hei-ying, Hei-ying glanced at Clow. "Don't do this . . ." he whispered.

"Now is a little to late to be asking for forgiveness, Hei-ying . . ." Clow couldn't meet his eyes; he stared at the white card.

Hei-ying felt an unusual feeling suddenly fill his throat; it was unusual because while he had felt it before it had always been accompanied by rage. It left a strange metal taste in his mouth, it was . . .

Fear.

Hei-ying was afraid of this simple white piece of card. He closed his eye, and felt something wet slide down his cheek, "Please . . ." his eye snapped open, he tried to meet Clow's dark eyes, "I did this for you . . . always for you . . ." Clow's mouth opened as if he was going to say something, then closed. Hei-ying tried again, "Please . . . I love you . . ."

"You love me?" Clow's eyes looked haunted as he echoed Hei-ying's tone.

"You told me to . . . you told me to love you . . . you and no-one else . . . to crave you and no-one . . . I have . . . I do . . . I always will . . ." Clow turned his back to Hei-ying, and rested his hands on his desk, "I've done everything I could to make sure no one could distract either of us from our love!" Hei-ying started to get angry now, "I tried so hard with those two . . . and that old man! The pitiful old man! He didn't put up so much of a fight, but still I should have gotten to him sooner!"

Clow turned slowly, "You are the one who drowned Marcibay . . ." Clow's dark eyes finally met Hei-ying's remaining eye, "You are the threat that almost drowned Keroberos . . . that's why the Watery was snarling at you . . . and I was so blind . . . I was so arrogant in my powers . . ." Clow scoffed at himself, "I must say, I thought I didn't have that particular Reed trait in my blood . . . but I was so wrong, wasn't I?"

"You are the Master Clow Reed . . ." Hei-ying began to recite.

 Clow ignored him, and stepped forward. His gilded staff appearing in his hand silently, "Hei-ying . . . the Adviser of the Clow . . ."

"Every action you make . . ." Hei-ying whispered, his voice an incorrect echo to Clow's.  

". . .I command thee. . ." The card began to spin slowly.

". . .every word you say. . ." Hei-ying stared unblinkingly at Clow.

Clow kept Hei-ying's gaze, as he continued the spell, ". . . as I strip thee of thy powers, remove from thee the magic I have bestowed upon you. . ."

The card started to glow, Hei-ying's tears started to flow more freely, ". . . is ultimate and right. . ."

"I command thee . . . seal thyself in this form I have chosen . . ."

Hei-ying's eye began to slide shut and he battled to stay conscious for this last time, the card burst into pure light. Hei-ying could feel the staff as it swung into place. It struck the air with an echoing magic resonance. The card disappeared, and started to materialise at the point where Clow's staff had struck. 

"And I . . ." Hei-ying breathed, ". . . I must obey you . . ."

"Clow card!" Clow said quietly, sealing the spell.

Magic started to stream from the card, blindly feeling for the soul that it was going to entrap in the card's confine. Hei-ying held his arms forward, following the final order Clow had given. As the magic began to wind around his feet, Hei-ying's head fell backwards, his last eye opened to stare at the ceiling he knew so well. The last remain stable aspect of his broken soul finally snapped, his obedience spell finally gave way. Hei-ying's mouth opened into a large 'O', and all the pain he had ever felt, every rage he had ever experienced, the body consuming fear he felt at this precise moment pour through as he started to scream.

"NOOOOOOO!!!" He suddenly turned and tried to get to the door.

Clow suddenly realised that the vision he had first seen Hei-ying in was coming true. The future was beginning to meet the past. Clow stepped away from the materialising confine, "I order you to submit!"

Hei-ying paid no attention, scrambling frantically, as green magic dragged him back towards his final destination. His long black hair suddenly whipped forward and wrapped itself around the study door handle of Clow's study. Hei-ying was using his last remaining magic to try and stop the inevitable. 

"Sword." Clow shouted, as the supernatural storm grew louder and more insistent. Deep violet magic wrapped around the gilded staff, transforming it into a long blade. 

Hei-ying stared at the magic sword, and held out his hand, "Clow, NO!" he begged, knowing this would be his last breath, "I love—"

"Never again!" Clow yelled angrily and brought the cold blade crashing down on Hei-ying's shiny black hair.

It sliced through the last remaining lifeline easily; time seemed to stop as Clow looked into Hei-ying's last remaining eye. Hei-ying's jaded eye was filled with betrayal, and loyalty, with love and hate, insanity and understanding. It was just a second. Just a brief second, Hei-ying didn't even have time enough to draw a second breath before the card sucked him into his absolute incarceration. 

The sword in Clow's hand clattered to the ground, and Clow joined it soon afterwards. The room was soundless, Hei-ying's cries silenced. Clow looked up, the new card created by Clow floated before him. Unlike the others, the card was black. Where there was crimson, there was black, gold there was grey. Clow plucked it out of the air and stared at it. Hei-ying's image was grey against the black background. The only colour was in the cracked jewel on his chest, the jaded earring he wore on his ear and the jade green gloves that he wore. Hei-ying, like the spirits of the Clow cards, was held in a pose. Visible only from his thighs upward, Hei-ying stood face on. His hands were held in front of his chest, one over the other, a jade dagger entwined with a red rose floated between the two palms.  

Clow looked closely at Hei-ying's face, the being's head was tilted slightly down, as if he was staring at the dagger, but his eye was closed. A single jade tear lay on his cheek, half shed. Clow swallowed, yet another chapter of his life had come to a close. Clow let the card go, and it floated back to the book. The card floated back to it's place, and the book slammed shut. As the lock snapped shut, the book's cover appeared to bleed. Black spread over the crimson like blood, corrupting the cover as Clow had corrupted Hei-ying. Clow closed his eyes as the book died. Hilligans had been right, something bad had happened, and Clow had been the cause of it. As the last bit of life seeped out of the blackened tome, Clow stood. He picked up the book, which glowed a dim green light, and walked over to the furthest shelve of the furthest isle, he silently slipped the black book onto the shelf. The final part of the book not yet stained by the spilling black blood, were the gold letters 'Hei-ying' but soon the letters began to seep, jade weeping into the gold. Once the transformation was complete, Clow raised his hand and waved it along the spine. He cast the last spell Hei-ying would ever be aware of, a spell that would ensure that neither Eriol . . . nor his other reincarnation . . . would ever desire to go near this book, let alone open it.

Yue stared at the coiled black hair in his hand; it was starting to fade, disappearing as Hei-ying's frantic shrieks increased. Keroberos and Yue both looked at the door when Hei-ying's voice suddenly stopped, there was a brief silence before Clow stepped out of his study. He was pale, and drained. Clow glanced at his remaining guardians before leaning back against the door. Keroberos and Yue were by his side before Clow had slid down on to the floor. He managed to pool enough energy to look up at his guardians, enough to speak, enough to meet Yue's amethyst eyes. 

"It . . . is done . . ." 

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Hei-ying: Alas . . . Poor me . . . I knew me, Horatio, I was a fine fellow . . . A fine fellow indeed . . . 

[Clow, Kero and Yue pick up Hei-ying and throw him out the window, crack open a bottle of fizz and start to dance]

DrM: As you can see everyone here at L.I.T DrM HQ are devastated by the departure of Hei-ying Reed . . .

Yue: The witch is dead!! That wicked old witch is dead!!

DrM: But he's not dead . . . Clow's just sealed him in the book . . .

Kero: [blinks] You mean there's a chance he might come . . . back?!

DrM: [smug] One never knows about these things . . .

Clow: [reads ITTS again] Oh, crap . . . 

Yue: What?

Clow: Read the prologue . . .

DrM: [chuckles] And who knows what happens between the sealing and then . . . and what's this I see ahead . . .? [Pulls out spy glass] minor Yaoi ahoy . . .

Clow: [perks up] Me again?

DrM: I see . . . [Dons Mystic Meg getup] I see . . . a dark haired man and an white haired angel getting it on . . . I see . . . the readers clicking the button below . . . and typing reviews . . . and I see a message from beyond . . . it says . . . please R&R . . .


	20. Nightmares

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Nineteen: Nightmares

The snow gusted in endless swirls outside the study's window.

Yue stared out of the glass, snow . . . his one weakness, and there was tons of it outside. He sighed sharply, "Concentrate!" He snapped at himself. Yue was sprawled over the window seat in one of Clow's old studies. Yue loved the room, and didn't really understand why Clow favoured the larger, downstairs study over this warm, upstairs room, with a comfortable window seat that easily showed the entirety of the Reed Mansion's grounds. The Mansion was encased in a time spell, which removed it from the effects of the Land's time. Keroberos, his eldest brother, had said the spell had been put in effect for the second time.

Yue didn't know when the first had been. He frowned; it might have been during the first couple of years of his existence. Yue couldn't actively remember the first few years of his life. He didn't know why this was, because Keroberos could easily recall his first sensation of the cards, prancing after Clow's footsteps, sleeping in his arms in this very window seat. Yue snorted, even after twenty years together, Keroberos as a kitten was a very foreign idea to him.

He pulled his attention back to the book of incantations, they were so familiar to him, but he had no memory of ever hearing them. "O, Cards created by Clow . . ." He paused as the wind blew particularly hard past the window, there was a snowstorm coming, Clow had informed them yesterday morning during breakfast. Both Clow and Keroberos hated snowstorms with a passion, while Yue loved them. He loved snow, and a whole storm's worth of snow provided several days' worth of the stuff to play in . . . Not that Yue, the Judge ever *played* in snow . . . it's just, Yue allowed a rare smile to grace his pale lips, it really was just that . . .

"I love snow . . ." He sighed.

"I'm glad someone does . . ." Clow's voice broke Yue's daydreaming state.

"Master Clow!" Yue hastily stood, "I hope you do not mind but I was having trouble concentrating in my own room and . . ."

"This room was empty, so you came here to . . ." Clow moved forward and picked up the book Yue had so suddenly closed, " . . . You came here to practice your incantations?" The tall magician fingered through a couple of the pages and hummed, "Hmm . . ."

Yue blushed slightly, then started to curse himself for it, the annoying warm flush in his cheeks was occurring more and more often. "I require a little more practice in . . ."

"I personally would have some here to watch the snow." Clow smiled as he sat down in the window seat, Yue smiled as he sat opposite, "Do you really think there will be a storm?" Yue said hopefully.

Clow looked out the window, "Yes, there will."

"But how do you know?" A deep rich voice rumbled from the doorway.

"You're finally awake then, Keroberos?" Yue taunted slightly, he was a little annoyed that the lion had found them; Yue liked being alone with Clow. "And I thought you would sleep through the entire day!"

"I would never miss lunch or dinner . . . especially since you're cooking . . ." The elder lion leapt up onto the window seat, and Clow spread his arms to allow the lion to stretch out and rest his head on Clow's chest. Yue pressed his back against the other side of the window seat. "One of these days I will not be there to cook for you, Keroberos . . . and then what will you do?"

Keroberos stared at him for a short time, seriousness tainting his expression, he was very aware that one day he and Yue would be separated. He blinked, and decided to worry about that another day, he snorted and said imperiously, "I shall get the Cardcaptor to bring me an unending supply of pudding to tied me over until you make your judgment, pronounce her fit to be our mistress then demand that you start cooking and she brings me an unending supply of pudding."

Yue rolled his eyes as Clow chuckled, "Sounds like a good idea to me, Keroberos."

"Of course it is . . ." Keroberos yawned; "It's one of my ideas!"

Yue returned his attention back to his book, after about half an hour Clow chuckled again, Yue looked up, "Nani?"

Clow smiled at him, and resumed stroking Keroberos' head; he turned to look out the window again. Yue wasn't aware of it but his bare feet were tickling Clow's, Clow was enjoying the affectionate touches too much to tell Yue what he was doing, so Clow settled instead for annoying the hell out of Yue and giving him one of his non-answering smiles.

As Clow turned to look out the window, Yue sighed and glanced at Keroberos, the large lion had fallen asleep on Clow's chest, not doubt due to the warm drowsy feeling that being to close to Clow and his magical aura always created. Yue blushed, //Or at least that's what Keroberos claimed . . .// He quickly amended. He stared down at his book and started to read again. 

Keroberos' tail started to wind itself around his hand. Yue had noticed when it was snowing; Keroberos always seemed to have the need to stay close to Yue. Yue frowned, and shook the warm tail off. He was fully grown now, and he could take care of himself, but he still appreciated the sentiment. He raised his hand out of the way of Keroberos' tail and turned the page.

That's when he heard the two sharp taps.

Yue's eyes slipped off the incantation he was reading, //What was that?//

He glanced at Keroberos, he was prone to play the odd trick on Yue, was this one of them aimed to distract him from his work? But Keroberos was fast asleep on Clow's chest. Yue dared a glance at Clow, who was smiling warmly out of the window. He looked like he knew what the sound was, but was carefully making it *look* like he didn't. Yue thought about asking him but just knew Clow would give him one of those damned 'Yes Yue, I do know something that you don't . . .' smiles and look away. Yue sighed and turned to look out the window, the snow was still falling and his reflection . . . was . . . wasn't there!

Yue's eyes widened as he thought he saw Clow mouth something at him. He blinked and the apparition was gone. Yue turned back to his book, quietly analysing what he had seen, a reflection of Clow . . . only much younger than his now fifty-two year old self. Yue looked up at Clow, he certainly didn't look like the other old humans, he looked pretty . . . Yue's head snapped back down to his book a few seconds later as he finished the thought, //He looks pretty good for his age, pretty *good* for his age . . . although . . .// Yue sneaked another look at the profile of Clow's kind face. His creator was also very pretty . . . the handsome, gentle sort of sense of the word . . .

"Storm's here now," Clow turned as Keroberos' deep voice rumbled from the doorway of his downstairs study.

"I noticed." Clow smiled and turned back to the window, the snowstorm was indeed a harsh one, and was covering the ground with thick metres of iced flakes. "Yue will be pleased."

His hand slipped down to stroke the thick fur on Keroberos' head. The lion had taken his helmet off in preparation for bed. Keroberos sat beside Clow, staring out upon the howling, swirling snow laden wind. They were silent for a few moments before they observed their yearly tradition. Keroberos pursed his lips together, "I miss him . . ."

Clow's smile faded, "I know . . . I do too . . ." there was another silence before Clow spoke again, "I'm so . . . I . . ."

Keroberos looked up as the powerful magician sank to his knees to face him, he started to shake his head, "Don't do this Clow . . ."

Clow's dark eyes creased with an unforgotten pain, "I wish you to do one thing for me . . ."

Keroberos frowned slightly, this wasn't part of their yearly custom, "What?"

"Apologise to Sak—the Cardcaptor . . . tell her that I'm sorry that Yue is so . . ."

"Don't." Keroberos growled quietly in disgust, Clow's eyes slid shut; Keroberos sighed and nudged his creator's head up, "I mean it!" His gold eyes sparkled dimly in the night's light, " . . . Nothing that happens, happens by itself . . . There is no coincidence in this world."

Clow nodded; "There is only the inevitable." The two exchanged their yearly prayer; Keroberos was the first to break.

"But that still doesn't bring back moonbeam . . ." The lion started to shudder as the grief began, Clow opened his arms, as he had done the first night after the attack and every snowstorm of every year since. As his sun guardian heaved huge racking sobs on to his shoulder, Clow's dark eyes filled with tears as he watch the night's snow swirl. Clow broke, he broke and together, they sobbed, and grieved, and screamed, and shook, and shuddered, and did this until they could grieve the loss of such a precious gift no more.

The storm lasted for quite a few days, considering it was only early winter, Yue hoped it would last all though Christmas. He had gotten bored so he had given into his curiosity and had started to explore the upper levels of the house. Both Keroberos and Clow had told him he could not leave the house during snowstorms, so every year when such a violent act of nature occurred Yue would walk around the house. He thought it was strange, Clow had lived in this huge house, all six floor of it, and yet, he never went any further than the third floor.

Yue could remember there was a time when they used the fourth floor but . . . he frowned as he tried to recall why exactly they had stopped using it. Some vague memory of having nightmares, awful violent nightmares came to mind, and Yue shrugged, he continued up the stairs. Clow used to keep the Clow cards on the fifth and the sixth floors, and the fourth floor used to be the sleeping floor, where Clow, Keroberos and Yue used to sleep.

Yue smiled, maybe he would find something from the first couple of years of his life, perhaps some diary, or maybe some . . . // . . . toys, and my bed with the pretty snowflakes and the moons, and then I can get my snow rabbit teddy back!// . . . Yue slowed to a stop as the strange thoughts crossed his mind. He felt so sad all a sudden, he abruptly felt like going to the fourth floor wasn't such a good idea after all. He turned and started to move downwards when he suddenly remembered that he had forgotten something. He clapped a hand over his mouth as he rushed upstairs. He had forgotten Clow's picture! It had Clow and it had Yue in it. . . and it had Keroberos and some of his very favourite Clow cards in it. . .

Yue ran up the stairs and down a corridor he hadn't set foot in since Clow had moved them down to the third floor, sealing all the rooms on the floor. He ran quietly along to a door engraved with a moon and a snowflake. He just had to get the present then he'd go down and the festivities would begin! He smiled as he started to turn the handle, Keroberos' laughter could be softly heard from inside . . .

Yue blinked when he realised the door was locked, he recoiled even more when he realised he was trying to get something he had never drawn from a room he had never entered. He looked down the corridor, half expecting to see someone turn slowly and walk back into a room, telling him off for making a mistake. Instinctively, Yue glanced at his little finger; he wrapped his other hand around it. It was yet another habit of his he couldn't explain, mistakes meant pain; errors were rewarded with excruciating punishments. Yue shied away from the strange door, and backed off. He shouldn't be here, or else someone . . . someone would . . . Yue's eyes widened as a voice quietly sounded, echoing over and over, overlapping itself in his mind, //. . .send you to hell you miserable little brat that's what I'll do I'll send you all the way to hell, damn you . . .//

"NO!" Yue instantly drew his ice arrow and aimed it down the corridor; he wasn't going to let him get him again, never again. The corridor was empty. Nobody threatened him. Yue breathed out slowly as he lowered his ice bow. Shaking his head, he walked down the corridor and down the stairs; he was reading too many horror stories, he decided. "Far too many . . ."

Reed mansion was prepared for Christmas as always, early on Christmas Eve's morning. Clow asked the Woody if she would kindly provide a suitable Christmas tree for the downstairs, Keroberos dragged the decorations box in as usual, and Yue carried in his gifts to Clow and Keroberos. Both were in well-wrapped boxes, Yue never allowed a single imperfect to spite anything he did. He hated mistakes with a passion, Keroberos sighed as he pulled out the velvet purple ribbons for the doorway. The red ones were long gone, many things had been sealed in the fourth floor rooms, Clow wanted to be sure that Yue never remember anything. Nearly everything that Hei-ying had ever touched, whatever might harbour any memory from him had been destroyed, or sealed away. Keroberos did miss his childhood room, but it, like Clow's room, still held Hei-ying's magical resonance.

He glanced at Clow, and wondered what this year's gift would be. Clow had been steadily dividing the Clow cards, one on each birthday. Last year, Yue had received the shadow card, while Keroberos had the sweet card under his protection. He smiled, Yue had suddenly discovered what Keroberos meant about the fact he loved his cakes sweet. 

Yue glanced over his shoulder; he could feel Keroberos gazing at him. He turned slightly just in time to see Keroberos turn and walk out of the study; "He's probably going to go to bed now . . ."

Yue looked up from his kneeling place by the tree, Clow stood beside him, watching as Keroberos left. "The winter takes a lot out of him, just as the summer does to you . . ." the magician smiled down at him, "Are you ready for tomorrow?" As Yue nodded, Clow smiled again, "Good! I have a few things to tend to . . . Please excuse me."

Yue stood and bowed quickly, Clow laughed slightly and nodded again. A few moments past after Clow had left the room, and Yue stood perfectly still, then he treaded over to the doorway quietly. Sticking his head out of the door, Yue looked to the left, an empty corridor, then to the right, another empty corridor. Yue smiled faintly, then said, just to be sure; "Keroberos?"

When no answer was returned, Yue murmured, "Clow?" Again no answer, Yue allowed his smile to grow, he was alone. He padded back into the room, "And now for a little detour . . ." 

He paced quickly over to the window, and clasped his hands behind his back; he hummed slightly as he leaned forward. The snow had stopped rather suddenly the night before, and while the grounds were still covered in the white powder, Yue preferred snow when it was falling. "Come on . . ." He murmured, "It's not Christmas without snow . . ."

He slid the heavy window up and leaned out the window, the air was cold enough, and the clouds certainly looked as if they were bursting to snow. Yue sighed; he really, really wanted it to snow . . . especially since it was his false form's birthday. Or at least that's what Yukito believed, Yue personally didn't have a birthday he celebrated but Clow and Keroberos treated the birthday of his false form as it was Yue's. 

Yue put his hands on the windowsill and pouted childishly, "It's still not Christmas without a bit of snow . . ." 

"Indeed, it isn't . . ." Yue's head snapped up at the sound of Clow's voice behind him.

His cold hands raced up to clutch his head as he hit it against the window frame. Yue winced as his head began to pound, and fell to one knee as his head began to swim light-headedly. He tried desperately to hold back the tears, and fought the instinct to return to his false form. There was a sharp intake of breath as Clow knelt down beside him, "Oooh . . ." Clow sighed in sympathy, "Let me have a look at that . . ." Clow lifted a hand off Yue's crown, "Gomen . . . I really shouldn't sneak up behind you like that, should I?"

Yue attempted to raise his head, to look at his creator and show him he was actually fine but somehow his eyes just wouldn't focus. He shut them, and then reopened them again, but still to no avail. Clow's face simply refused to come into focus. 

A warm breeze-like aura brushed against his senses, Keroberos had returned. "Forgot to put th—Clow? Yue? What happened?"

"Yue's bumped his head . . ." Clow chuckled slightly, "I think I might have surprised him once too often."

Keroberos growled, "It's not funny, look at him!"

Clow put his hand on Yue's back; the moon angel had started to sway. "Yue?" Yue whimpered slightly as the swaying got worse, he frowned and staggered to his feet. "Yue! Please," Clow got to his feet as well, trying to grab Yue. The angel staggered and started to collapse, his eyes snapped open hazily when he found his legs couldn't support him but he wasn't lying on the floor.

He moved his head slowly to peer over his shoulder, Keroberos' tiny form had grabbed the back of his robes in it's tiny teeth. "Arigato Keroberos . . ." Yue murmured.

"MmClow! Mdo Mmomthing!" Keroberos yelled at Clow. 

Yue looked as Clow moved in front of him, "It's all right Yue . . . let me take care of you . . ." Yue's eyes refused to stay open as Clow's warm hands cupped his chin, "Yue? Can you open your eyes briefly?" Clow smiled as Yue struggled to focus on his creator. "Thank you." Clow brought his hand up and held it in front of Yue's face. Yue's eyes crossed slightly as he attempted to focus on the glowing hand that hovered in front of him.

Yue slept for the entire day as Clow rest his hand on the small bump that his shock had caused. "Is he all right?"

"Yes, Keroberos . . ." Clow murmured, "It's just a small bump, nothing serious."

The large lion nodded and leapt on to Yue's bed, "Good," He turned into his small form and fluttered up to Yue's pillow. He put a small paw against the pale forehead, "He looks so . . . much like . . ." 

"I know . . ." Clow place his hand on the bump again, allowing his magic to heal the injury. 

Keroberos smiled and looked out the window, "Are you ready for tomorrow?" 

Clow hummed, "Mmm-hmm . . . he thinks there won't be any snow tomorrow. " 

"Why exactly have you stopped the snow anyway?"

"Trust me . . ." Clow smiled out of the window, night was approaching, "Although . . . I'm going to allow the snow to fall for tonight . . . the ground snow isn't as fresh as I'd like it to be for tomorrow."

"Hmmm?" Keroberos yawned. Clow smiled and turned to him.

"Never mind . . ." He opened his arms, "Come along . . . it's time for you to go to bed."

"I would be in bed . . . but no, here you are muttering nonsense, causing Yue to hit his head, and keeping me awake!" Keroberos fluttered easily into Clow's arms and fell asleep almost as soon as he landed in Clow's arms. Clow smiled and walked towards the door, he paused to glance at Yue. His moon angel's eyes were closed, and peaceful . . . //He almost looked . . .// Clow shook his head, Yue wasn't dead . . . just the moonchild was.

It was extremely early when Keroberos awoke. He looked at the clock on his bedside, "Nani? So early in the morning . . . Merry Christmas . . ." he murmured as he padded to the window. Clow had allowed the snowstorm back onto the grounds. He shivered slightly, "I hate snow . . ."

His gold eyes widened as he felt someone staring at him, he turned to stare at his door. There was no one there, he bounded over to the doorway and looked out into the corridor. At first he thought the dark figure was Clow, walking down the corridor, as he did to check on his creations. But when the figure's dark hand swung down by it's side, Keroberos ran after it. The thing had a sharp pair of scissors in it's grasped hand and it was heading towards Yue's bedroom. "Not again . . ." Keroberos murmured as he ran after the rapid shadow. "Please not again!"

The corridor suddenly seemed so much longer than before as the shadow person stood in front of Yue's door, and yet Keroberos seemed barely half way down the corridor. The dark figure paused as it raise it's hand to open the door. "No! Not again!" Keroberos called, "Leave him be!"

The dark figure smiled at him mockingly as it stepped through the door. Keroberos barrelled through the door a few seconds later, expecting to see the same bloodbath he'd seen when—

Nothing, the room was empty.

Keroberos sighed as he padded over to Yue's bed, "A night full of memories . . ." He murmured as he leapt on to the bed, careful not to tread on the long, unbound hair as it spilled around his brother. He glanced out the window, "And a brother broken . . ." He looked at Yue, the angel slept peacefully. "Such a horrendous price to pay . . . to keep you sane . . ."

Keroberos' shoulders slumped, for the past twenty years he had done this every snowstorm. The same dream, the same menacing figures stalking Yue, the same feeling of being too late. He and Clow accepted now Yue was never going to return to the way he was. It had gotten marginally better over the years; Yue could be seen more often. But still, Yukito would completely be unaware of Yue, yet Yue was always aware of Yukito. Keroberos and Clow never tried to undo the split; they felt it was a worthy price to pay if only to keep Hei-ying's terrible prophesies from coming true.

There was a low groan from the bed as Yue sat up, "Keroberos?"

"Ohayo . . ." Keroberos smiled, "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," He glanced out the window, "It's snowing!"

Keroberos snorted as his younger brother's attention was instantly torn away from him, "I'm glad someone loves the snow."

Yue looked at him, "Why don't you like the snow?"

Keroberos smiled and looked out the window. "It's too cold for me . . ."

"Why do you and Clow act so strangely during winter?" Yue pushed his hair back slightly as some of it spilled over his shoulder; his brother stared at him with a strange distracted smile. Yue allowed another rare smile to grace his lips, and pushed some of his bangs out of his eyes, before waving in front of Keroberos' golden eyes. "Keroberos. . ."

"Hmmm?"

Yue pulled his knees up and wrapped his arms around them, "Why do you hate snowstorms?"

Keroberos seemed to sober slightly, as he gazed at Yue. His gold eyes were serious as he started to smile, "I lost . . ." the golden lion's eyes closed briefly, and then he looked up again, "No, *almost* lost something very precious to me . . ."

"What was it?" Yue frowned, "Maybe I could help you find it . . .?"

Keroberos glanced out the window, "No . . . You can't help it."

Yue reached forward and stroke Keroberos' head; "It was probably pudding, wasn't it?"

Keroberos smiled, "It was something sweet and I do love it very much."

Yue lay down again, "You're strange Keroberos, you're very strange . . ."

Keroberos smiled softly, it was the closest he could ever come to tell Yue about his former self. He chuckled lightly, and lay down beside him. Yue sighed quietly as he drifted back to sleep, he loved the sound of Keroberos' laugh.

There was a quiet knock at the door, and Yue awoke and sat up again. Keroberos was gone, but then . . . //Where am I?// Yue wasn't //was// in the right bed. He glanced up, instead of his normal blue canopy, there was a //my// white silk one, littered with moons and snowflakes. "This isn't //is// my bed!" 

The knock became more pronounced. As Yue looked around, the room was //mine// a child's, full of //my// toys, something Yue was sure he //played with all the time// shunned as a child. The door handle jiggled, //Don't// "Come in?" Yue called, and the door swung open. A dark figure stood there silent. //Keep away from me!// "Clow?"

The figure raised it's hands, twirling a sharp looking pair of scissors in it's hands, //Leave me alone!// "Who are you?"

The figure didn't answer as he stepped forward, "Who are you?!" Yue demanded again, //Please leave me alone . . . I didn't get any wrong this time!//

Yue scooted back on the //his// bed, the figure was getting closer, //I practiced . . . and I was nervous . . . I didn't mean to stutter!// His hand suddenly moved toward the bedside, his ice arrow ribbon was there. What was it doing there? He never took it off //anymore//! He gasped as the dark figure grabbed his hand. "Let me go!" //Onegai! You're hurting me!//

The silver scissors were raised in the air, and Yue couldn't take his eyes off them, the strange voice he had heard on the fourth floor returned.

"I'll send you to hell, you miserable brat! That's what I'll do! Send you all the way to fucking hell!"

//NO!// "No!" Yue tried to pull his arm away, his //fear// anger started to show in his voice, "LET ME GOOO!" He yanked at his arm, eyes still staring at the scissors as they came crashing down on him. //Clow! Keroberos!// "SOMEONE HELP ME!!"

Yue gasped as he sat up again, back in his own //the new// bedroom. He glanced up, the //wrong// right canopy was back over his head; he looked to the pillow beside himself. Keroberos was sleeping soundly beside him; he didn't stir much as Yue got out of bed. He was disturbed by the dream, by his thoughts, and his feelings that this was no ordinary nightmare. Yue wasn't the type that had nightmares; much less allowed his sleep to be disturbed by a figment of his imagination. Yue glanced at the door; he was half expecting to hear the knock again. He stepped over to his dresser and sat in front of the mirror. Picking up a brush, he quickly ran it through his hair, tying it back neatly. 

If he was going to go see Clow, he wasn't going to be in a bedraggled mess. Clow would expect him to be neat and tidy, always. Cool and composed, like the judgement maker was supposed to be, //not like a foolish boy that is continually tripping over his own robes . . .// Yue frowned as the age old reminder rang across his mind, the memory was right as always, he could not be seen to be anything less than the perfect creation. Checking himself once more in the mirror, and securing his dressing gown once more, Yue picked up a nearby candle and slipped out of the door.

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Yue: What the . . .?

Kero: What happened? I was eating . . . mmmmm . . . food . . .

Clow: Well, it's skipped twenty years . . . and Yue has no memory of . . . you-know-who.

Yue: Who? [Looks at DrM] who are they talking about?

DrM: Um . . . noooooooo –one . . .

Kero: [growls] What's that strange you-know-who-shaped lump under that rug you're sitting on?

DrM: What lump? What? Who? [Looks around innocently] Someone's throwing rocks . . . What? [Looks at readers] what? Do you know whom they speak of? No? Me either . . . tell ya what, please R&R and tell me what you think!

Yue: Awww . . . Come on, tell me!!

Hei-ying: [muffled] OOH! PICK ME! LET ME TELL HIM!!! I KNOW!!

Clow, Kero and DrM: SHHHHH!!!


	21. Aishiteru

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twenty: Aishiteru  

Clow ran his finger along the bookshelf in his bedroom; he could never sleep properly during snowstorms and often stayed up reading some of his old magic books. He slipped some nameless book off the shelf, and walked over to his window. He flicked through a couple of pages; it was his old lecture book. His mother would make him write down nearly every word she said during their lessons together. 'To truly appreciate magic, it is not sufficient to merely to practice it. Without understanding, mistakes can and will be made.' Clow smiled as he started to hear his mother's voice, as she used to pace in front of him, 'Every entity created requires a purpose, every spell a function, Clow-san, I cannot stress this law enough, as the sun gives us day, as the moon gives us night, these principles must always be obeyed . . .'  

Clow sighed; he suddenly wished he hadn't packed these books away. He mother had taught him so well, and he could have avoided his shortcoming with Hei-ying. He shook his head and flicked a few more pages; he wasn't going to even think about his worst mistake. He leaned again the window's frame, as he remembered his mother's lessons. Always in the kitchen as she cooked, he smiled, his mother was the greatest cook in the family, she could do everything. Cook, knit, sew, comfort, teach, and love. He brushed the page softly and began to talk aloud. "The present is merely the future and the past collided. Nothing that happens happens by mistake." 

That was certainly true, Clow had realised that Eriol and Sakura' presence had caused the creation of the cards and of his guardians. The visions were merely prompts, but without them Clow would have probably gone with his original plan. He had moved away from both of his parents' families because he wanted to get away from the constant reminder that he was going to create some sort of new magic that would save the magic world from being forgotten. 

Clow sighed as he turned the page, his mother had taught him these things and yet, he still had regrets about things he could never change. He looked over at the mantelpiece, even after twenty years it still held an empty frame. The frame had once held a picture that Yue had once drawn for him, but it, like so many things Hei-ying had corrupted, was gone. Clow had elected to burn the picture rather than seal it up in the rooms on the fourth floor. It was too painful to even look at; the picture had the two angels on it, Hei-ying when Clow had trusted him, and Yue . . . when he had been a child. He missed that Yue, but recently had been finding himself . . . Clow smiled as he recalled the new sensation; enjoying the attention Yue was giving him now. Not that Yue's emotional development had been stunted; if anything, it had been accelerated by the attack. 

Yue had almost complete control over his emotions but over the last three or four years, Clow had noticed a slight awakened hint to Yue's gaze. The moon guardian tried very hard to hide it, and Clow always pretended he never noticed, but Yue had started to notice his Master, started to notice sexual feelings. Clow smiled, he had to admit he enjoyed the look, and he did find himself doing everything he could to make Yue blush, just a little, that faint flush in Yue's cheeks made Clow's breath quicken. But still Clow never enticed Yue to him, he had made that mistake with Hei-ying, had taken him too soon, and the star guardian had come to believe that *that* was love. 

He frowned and returned his attention to the book, "Nothing that happens happens by accident . . . There is no coincidence in this world . . ." His attention slipped off the book again, turning to more tempting thoughts. He would wait, wait for Yue to come to understand his feelings, then perhaps, maybe, possibly Clow would start to return Yue's affections, then they could start a quiet little relationship . . . Clow shook himself out of his daydream; his imagination was straying down that path far too many times over the last two years. He stared at his lecture book, as he finished the line. 

"There is only . . . the inevitable."

A knock at his door made him look up. "Come in . . ." He frowned a little; Keroberos and Yue didn't share his problem with sleeping in snowstorms. Yue stepped in, looking faintly disgusted with himself, and slightly nervous. He paused in the doorway, the room was dark, and the light afford from his single candle lit only the bottom half of his face.

Clow almost gasped, as the crashing realisation of an old vision came forth, as a wave of melodious love, of pure affection, and of yearning desire rolled over his senses. He was suddenly overwhelmed, it was Yue. //Yue, all this time . . .// This was the vision he had spent thirty years waiting for, the vision that he had been begging to happen. The vision that had made him so angry that he ignored it, and took Hei-ying in his lust and in revenge. Yue started to blush as Clow stared at him, the angel's fingers started to fiddle with the candle's base. Clow smiled and looked out the window, the snowstorm. //Finally . . . I have my last love// he thought happily.

"Clow . . . I apologise for the intrusion at such an hour but I . . . I . . ." Yue blushed again, what was he going to tell Clow, that his moon guardian had had a bad dream and now wanted comfort like a child?

Clow smiled and looked back at his moon angel, "I'm happy you're here, Yue . . . the storm . . ." Clow swallowed, Yue was here, //He really is finally here!// He forced a calm look on his face, ". . . The storm was upsetting me . . . will you stay with me?"

At first, Yue's face betrayed a look of surprise, then it dissolved into a look of gratefulness as he realised his creator was giving him an excuse for being here, and not have to admit the truth aloud. He stepped closer, "If I may?"

Clow smiled again, "Of course."

As he closed his lecture book and slid it gently onto his beside, Yue blew out the candle and carefully set it on a nearby table. He paused by Clow's bed, as if seeking permission to get on to the silken violet covers. Clow nodded, and held back from saying 'Of course you can sleep in my bed, sleep in my arms, sleep with *me*, Yue, please . . . I've been waiting so long for you . . .'   

Yue smiled and crawled onto the bed, he had hadn't slept so close to Clow in such a long time. His body suddenly reacted strangely to the idea of being in such a proximity to his creator, Yue swallowed and hoped he wasn't blushing; he sat rather awkwardly on the edge of the bed, unsure as to how close he was allowed.

Clow smiled and opened his arms, "Yue . . ."

With almost childlike glee, Yue dived into the embrace, and pressed his head against Clow's chest. Clow smiled and raised his hands. Clapping twice sharply, the lights all went out, the shadows crawling into place quickly. 

"Goodnight Yue . . ."

"Goodnight Clow." Yue sighed, he was so warm, and Clow's aura was so intoxicating, he giggled slightly. He loved being so close to Clow, it was always so welcoming. Clow chuckled as well; Yue raised his head and looked at Clow. "Nani?"

Clow squeezed his arms around his moon angel; "I like it when you and Keroberos are near." He murmured, "You're both so soft and cuddly . . . And you're purring!"

Even in the dim light, Yue's pale face could be easily seen. His gentle features always reflected light; he was, of course, like the moon. His tender amethyst eyes glowed faintly, and Clow doubted he was aware of it. The soft light in his eyes meant he was aroused, no doubt by the prospect of spending a night with his creator, the man he had been slowly falling in love with over the last few years. Clow chuckled again; his direction of thought wasn't exactly being true. Clow was the one who had been slowly falling in love; he wondered how he appeared to Yue. Lying on his back, his dark hair unbounded; Clow Reed was gazing at his youngest creation. His dark eyes were no doubt wide as they attempted to take in every detail of the angel that was propped up on one elbow, with one hand resting lightly on his chest. 

Clow swallowed, his hand trembling slightly as he raised a hand off Yue's slender waist to trace the pencil thin white eyebrow. Yue breathed out slowly, as if he was afraid of ruining this moment, his glowing amethyst eyes sliding shut. 

"Clow . . ." he started to whisper, "Clow . . . I . . ."

"Shh . . ." Clow smiled as Yue frowned when he lifted his fingers off his face. He moved them slightly; the first tie in Yue's soft hair undid itself and folded itself neatly on his beside. "You wear your hair so tightly, allow me to . . ."

"Yes . . ." Yue nodded slightly as Clow brought his fingers back to his angel's face. He bestowed slight kisses on the worn fingers, delighting in the rough flesh against his soft lips. "Clow . . . yes . . . anything . . ."

Clow's eyes closed a little as he repeated this process, for every tight ribbon undone, he would run his fingers over Yue's face. The angel would become more and more daring as Clow pressed his fingers against his lips. At first, he brush his lips over them, then Clow would let another tie loose, and Yue would kiss the finger. Clow battled a groan when Yue nipped at the fingers lightly. The last tie undone and Clow pulled his hand away from Yue's mouth. Yue moaned slightly, his eyes opened to reveal they were glowing slightly brighter. Clow quickly grabbed the hand Yue was resting on his chest, "Yue . . ." 

Yue couldn't believe it, as Clow laced his fingers with his, and pulled his creation closer. Yue didn't think he'd ever be able to breathe again, he felt Clow's other hand stroke upwards slowly. He fought the urge to buck when Clow's hand ran over the spot where his wings would normally spurt. Clow's legs began to wrap around his leg slowly as it jerked slightly, "Steady Yue . . . let me . . ."

"Please . . ." Yue's voice moaned quietly as Clow's hand pressed slightly against the sensitive area. "Clow . . ." he squeezed his eyes shut tightly and pressed his forehead against Clow's chest. Yue was whimpering quietly, Clow knew why and he smiled as he pressed a little harder. His moon angel's teeth bit down delicately on his bottom lip as Clow directed a little magic to his hand. He unlaced his other hand and ran light fingers over his pale sharp jaw, pulling it up. Such a simple act, almost took Clow's breath away, his angel was trembling with the simple pleasure Clow provided. "Yue . . ." He ran his knuckles over the pale lips, "Yue . . . open your eyes, let me see you . . ."

Yue's eyes opened, and he breathed quickly. Frowns and smiles chased each other over his gentle features. He didn't know what to do, he wanted to tell Clow something, something that had been buried in his heart since the day he realised what it was. He moved slightly on to Clow, his mouth moving but no words would utter themselves. He frowned slightly as he watched Clow's eyes widen slightly, and his lips curve into a knowing smile. 

Yue rolled off instantly, and lay by Clow's side. Slightly panting, he brought his hands up to cover his blushing face, //He felt me!// Yue sat up instantly, realising Clow could probably see how stimulated he was. "I-I-I-I'm so sorry Master Clow . . . I-I'd better get back to my own—" Yue scooted towards the end of the bed, without even glancing at the now very amused Clow. His pale feet didn't even touch the floor, when Clow suddenly wrapped his arms around Yue's waist. He turned his head slightly as Clow brushed his lips over the bejewelled ear. "Stay with me . . ."

"I shouldn't . . . I'm not . . ."

"Going to leave me?" Clow's fingers laced with his soft silvery white hair. "Yue . . . The storm's frightening me . . ." Clow pressed his face into Yue's silken white hair, the smell of lavender and ice invading his senses, he growled as his own arousal grew, "Stay with me . . ."

Yue's eyes threaten to roll back in his head, as Clow's hand pressed against his back, he threw his head back and pressed it hard against Clow's shoulder. "Clow!" Clow smiled as he moved his hand from Yue's hair, he pressed it hard against Yue's throat, allowing it to steal down the cumbersome dressing gown. He smiled as he realised Yue's hands were grasping the bed firmly. 

Yue's eyes snapped open when he realised Clow was scooting back towards the pillows. He growled slightly as he turned to glare at Clow, he was painfully aroused and Clow had broken off suddenly. Clow smiled, and beckoned him closer. Yue paused, he could just dive into Clow's arms, but instead he chose to stand and walk around the bed. Clow sat up, keenly observing his bold angel, "Are you playing with me, my angel?"

Yue smiled and slowly removed every article of clothing on his back. His silvery mane every bit as fine as the small twirl of hair in Keroberos' tail, carefully hid his lean body from Clow's hungry eyes. Clow sat up straighter, when had Yue learned to be this seductive? 

His long hair covered Yue climbed on to the bed, carefully making sure his every movement tantalisingly revealing but hidden at the same time. As he knelt on the soft sheets in front of Clow, the shimmering white locks pooled around him. "Clow?" 

Clow tried to hold on to his mind, restrain himself from taking Yue, pulling into his arms and bestowing passionate kisses all over the angel's pale body. "Yue."

Yue smiled, and ran the tip of his tongue seductively over his cattish white teeth. "Come here . . ." He breathed, and was amazed as Clow obediently moved closer. Clow seemed focused purely on him, he enjoyed the heated gaze, and loved it even more when Clow spread his arms wide open. With almost innocent glee, Yue leapt into his embrace again. He wrapped his arms around Clow neck and stared into the dark eyes of his creator. "Clow . . . I . . ." Yue began, but found the dark eyes too mesmerising; he closed his eyes and held Clow closer. He mimicked Clow's actions as he breathed into his creator's ear, "Aishiteru . . ."

Clow didn't answer, he held Yue tighter, and pressed his lips against the pale skin of his shoulder. Yue sat back slightly, to allow Clow to kiss his way up his delicate throat. Yue gasped as he realised Clow was talking to him through his mind, // Aishiteru, Ich liebe du, J'adore, I have so many ways I could tell you . . . koibito . . . I love you!// Clow pulled back slightly, panting heavily, he licked his lips and gathered himself before he looked at Yue. He smiled, as he brushed his palms over the angel's flushed cheeks, pulled a damp lock of hair off his sweating brow. Yue's body was warm, Clow's hands travelled down his creation's body. He squeezed Yue's thighs briefly before moving his hands back up the heated angel's chest. Yue smiled, as he pressed his forehead against Clow's; "Make me your koibito forever." 

Clow chuckled, and pressed his hand against the sensitive place on Yue back, as soon as the angel hissed slightly, Clow twined his fingers in the white mane, and pulled Yue's head closer. Their first kiss, their first proper kiss. Clow almost felt like dancing, Yue was going to be his, and he was going to be Yue's and then they would be together forever. Happily ever after. 

The kiss was soft at first, gentle, it completely reflected the virgin that Yue was. Yue had never done this before, they were kissing, he had read about this in the library. He enjoyed it immensely, so much so that he didn't care if the world was coming to an end, as long as he and Clow remain locked like this forever, Yue would die happily. He felt Clow's hands slip down his back, one cupping him, drawing his body closer. The other slipped around the front; Yue fought the urge to giggle as Clow ran his fingers lightly over his tense stomach. //Please . . . Please touch me a bit lower . . .// Yue thought, forgetting Clow could hear him.

//Perhaps later . . . Who says we need to rush?//

//I want you now!//

Clow smiled into the kiss, //Koi . . . You are mine, as I am yours, for the rest of eternity . . . Be patient . . .// He tapped his fingers lightly against the tensing stomach. Yue jolted a bit, his excitement becoming a bit too demanding to bear. 

//Please?//

Clow Reed sniggered a little at Yue's pouting tone; he broke the kiss and raised his hand to cup Yue's cheek. "Aishiteru . . ." 

Yue's eyes were very gently as he leant into Clow's cupped hand, "Please . . .?" He murmured, "Please . . ."

"What are you asking for?" Clow smiled with amusement.

Yue slid off his Master's lap and stared at him, Clow blushed slightly as he watched look down his body, taking in everything. Yue sighed, and then drew in a breath as if preparing himself. Clow raised an inquisitive eyebrow as Yue began to lean forward, then he realised what the angel's aim was, "No!" 

Yue jerked up quickly, "Master?"

Clow's face darkened quickly then cleared just as quickly, "You will never call me Master in bed . . . I love you," He pulled Yue closer again, "When we are together like this, we are equals . . . understand?"

The angel stared at him quietly, understanding this gift Clow was giving him, he smiled, "Then how am I to please you then, Clow?"

Clow turned slightly and gently pushed Yue down, he leant over his angel quickly, "Wait here a moment . . ." then the magician rolled out of the bed, and quickly walked over to his chest of drawers. Yue lay, staring up at Clow's canopy, it was a deep purple, Clow's favourite colour, and had a gold embroidered version of Clow's magic circle. Yue sighed happily, as Clow bounced back on to the bed. He laid a small dish of some oily substance carefully on the bed. "What is that?"

Clow dipped a finger into it, "It's to make things easier between us . . ." He paused and looked at Yue very seriously, "Are you sure?" Yue smiled, and turned over; he knew what was going to happen to some extent, he had read about things like this. Pressing his head into the pillow, he braced himself for the first shock. Clow noticed Yue clenched his teeth as he nodded, "Yue . . . my angel . . . Relax first . . . I won't touch you, or it will hurt more . . ."

Yue breathed out and smiled as Clow rubbed his back in small circles, the magician hummed gently. He felt Clow play with his hair a bit, deliberately press on the wing joint and the flow of magic he directed to his hand as he did, he also felt Clow's other hand pass gently over his lower back, getting lower until he felt a cold finger dip into him.

Clow leant forward and kissed Yue's head as the white haired angel's back arched back, "Shhhh . . . it's okay, please my angel . . . Relax . . . shhh . . ." He pulled Yue's long locks out of the way and turned Yue's head so he could see his face. The angel's face creased in pain as Clow pushed his finger deeper then cleared and smiled encouragingly as Clow retracted it.

A few more moments of loving preparation, and Clow smiled as Yue pushed back against him. Yue's heavy eyelids opened as Clow retracted his fingers entirely, "Wha . . .?"

Clow smiled as he moved behind Yue, kneeling between the long pale legs. The angel's voice was leaden with desire as he sat up too. "Clow . . .?"

"Shh . . ." Clow murmured as he grasped Yue's hips firmly, he noticed he was becoming drunk with passion as well, "Turn around . . ." Clow ordered quietly, "Turn around . . . I want to see your face . . ."

As Yue turned, Clow leant forward to kiss his angel; the two were on the verge of being complete. Yue eagerly pressed himself against Clow, ready to take whatever Clow would bestow on him. The dark haired magician smiled and pulled back, he raised his hand again and cupped the angel's face again, "I love you . . ." Clow confessed again, Yue dipped his head and blushed, Clow shook his head, and lifted Yue's face to him again, "I love you . . . so much . . . I never want to be without you ever . . ."

Yue lifted his hand to Clow's lips, and whispered gently, "You won't ever know what it is to be without me . . ." He promised, " . . . I won't ever let you . . ."

Before the night was over . . . Clow promised himself as he gazed at his loving angel, before the night was over he would drive Yue insane with pleasure. 

Clow's eyes widened as this thought crossed his mind, what if he really did drive Yue insane? Like he did Hei-ying? 

"What is it?" Yue asked as Clow turned his face away, "What's wrong?"

"I can't do this to you, Yue . . ." Clow pulled him closer, "I can't risk this happening again, I love you too much!"

"What do you mean?" Yue pushed back from him and searched his face. "Why are you doing this? Is there something wrong with me? I thought . . ."

"Shh . . ." Clow brushed his fingers over Yue's lips, "Shhh . . . it's alright." He raised his hand in front of Yue's face, "I love you . . ." he closed his eyes and raised the hand in the 'Stop', he was unwilling to watch Yue's betrayed eyes slide shut as he fell unconscious. 

Clow hurriedly got off the bed; he didn't look at Yue as he waved his hand in his direction. Yue's clothes and hair ties quickly attended him; Clow knew he wouldn't be able to see this through if Yue was still undressed. He pulled on his discarded dressing gown and walked quickly over to his dresser; there was a cool basin of water ready there.  He was going to wash his face, cool down, before he faced Yue again. He delved his fingers into the water, but paused as he heard voices from behind him. He looked at the window; the snow had slowed down substantially, yet it was still a storm. "A vision? After all this time?" Clow murmured as he turned, "What more could you possibly tell me?"

He wasn't in his own room anymore; in fact he was outside, in a shrine of some sort. It held some magic power, centred mostly on the moon. He smiled slightly; Yue would find this place very comforting. 

"Leave me alone!" Clow spun at the sound of Yue's voice, who was hurting him?

"Yue! Come here, just let me . . ."

"I said leave me *alone*!" Yue didn't sound like he was in any pain; Clow moved towards the small hiding bushes, he sounded more like he was upset. 

"Look, I can be just as stubborn as you!" The unfamiliar voice sounded again, "you're upset and you're upsetting Keroberos, and Keroberos is upset so *both* of you are upsetting the kaijuu!" 

"I am not upset!"

"Then how come you stuck halfway through your transformation?" Clow finally found them; a tall dark haired boy was standing next to a floating cocoon of Yue's white fluffy wings, the boy was trying to pry the wings apart. "What was it you saw in that pond?"

"I'm not stuck and that's none of your business!" Clow frowned slightly at the tone of Yue's voice, Yue was very upset. Clow wished he would let the dark haired boy comfort him. 

"Yue! Come out here this minute! "

"Since when did I pronounce you the Card Master?! Go away!"

"Yue! Out or I'm coming in!" There was a pause as Yue tried to hide a laugh, the dark haired boy smiled as he realised that Yue was softening, "I'm deadly serious, I'm coming in, and then I'll drag you out if needs be!"

The was another pause before Yue's wings started to peel back, Yue stood, floating a few inches off the ground. He looked upset and amused at the same time, "I saw Clow . . ."

"Wasn't that good?"

Yue landed and made his wings disappear, he turned away, "It was, but then it wasn't . . . I . . . I . . ." He turned back to the dark haired boy, "I love *you*." The dark haired boy blinked, as Yue turned away again.

"I love you too," the dark haired boy wrapped his arms around Yue, "I've told you this so many times . . . I have always loved you and Yukito. Both of you mean everything to me." 

Yue's face creased as the dark haired boy confessed this, "I know, I know, we both know . . . but Clow . . ."

The dark haired boy pulled a hand up and cupped Yue's cheek, he leant closer towards Yue, "He's gone . . . but I'm here, let me. . ."

Yue didn't let him finish as he pushed up on his toes and kissed the boy. Clow watched with infinite sadness, as he realised that Yue was very practiced at kissing this boy, "So this is the one . . ." Clow murmured as the vision began to fade, Clow smiled as he watch Yue's face soften, losing all of his sadness and indulging in the love this other held for him.

Clow swallowed as he returned to his room, he gazed at Yue, who was now fully dressed, sleeping lightly on the covers. "Sleep card . . ." he murmured, "Place Yue in a slumber so deep that every word he hears from me will be imbedded in his mind, but he will always dismiss as a mere dream . . ."

As the sprightly fairy dusted Yue with her glowing blue dust, Clow climbed on to the bed again. He knelt and clasped his hands in his lap. He wasn't sure how to begin, he thought briefly of quoting some great poetry, some great literature piece that would sum up what Clow had to say, but none seemed adequate. "Yue . . . I love you, but I can't risk the evil that struck down Hei-ying to take you . . ." he brushed a soft lock from Yue's face, "I wouldn't be able to cope with losing you . . . if only I had listened to Mister Hilligans, huh? Then I would be so happy with you . . . I could just hold you in my arms for the rest of my life and then some . . . but I can't, I *won't* . . ." He paused, and took a couple of quick breathes, not caring that he was beginning to cry, "But don't worry, while I won't be able to show you how much you mean to me . . . you will be well taken care of, you will find a love so much better deserving of you . . ." Clow snorted cynically, "Because there will be someone else you will love, someone else, another . . . someone purer than this tainted soul . . ." he smiled as he brushed his finger over Yue's lips, "And he will take my place within your heart . . ." He shook his head, "I was wrong, so very wrong . . . I chose the wrong angel for the wrong reasons and now . . . I'm going to lose you . . . but I love you . . . Yue, I love you . . ."

Keroberos pushed the door slightly open, he'd just woken up, when he realised that Yue wasn't in bed. He'd panicked at first, but then realised Yue was in Clow's bedroom. He listened quietly as Clow made his tearful confession. 

"I always . . ." Clow leant over Yue and brushed one last wistful kiss over the pale lips he had longed for, for so long, ". . . Will . . ." Clow sat up and dried his eyes; he stared at Yue for a short while before raising his hand. Waving it over Yue's face, he murmured a simple spell. "Forget . . . Forget, every kiss you have given me . . . Forget, every word of love you have given me . . . Forget this night of passion, and remember simply that you came here for comfort . . . wake tomorrow and know you have received this calm . . ." Clow paused as another fragment of an old vision came back. Again the vision of the day when he will Yue and Keroberos that he was going to die . . .

Yue instantly looked up, he fought a short battle with himself, and chose to fall to his knees by Clow's chair. He picked up Clow's hand and started to press it against his face. Clow leaned towards him, the smell of fresh snow and lavender emanated from Yue; he ran his fingers into the silken hair, "Then why?" Yue sobbed finally.

Clow murmured his response, "Because I am sick of knowing everything that has happened, that is happening, that will happen." 

"But I love you!" Yue cried then flinched as if he had committed some terrible sin. He looked down in shame; Clow slid his fingers under the angel's chin and pulled it up gently. "I knew this as well . . ."

Clow's eyes closed as he realised that the next time, the first time from Yue's point of view, and the last from Clow's that Yue would ever tell Clow that he loved him would be the last day of his life. He suddenly felt a great pain in his heart, Yue's love for him would always be in his eyes, but Clow would never be able to acknowledge it . . . forever, like a drowning man could see the surface of the water, forever Clow would be able to see Yue's love but never touch it . . . he suddenly understood the tale of Midas. 

"Clow . . .?"

Clow's eyes snapped open as Keroberos' voice sounded close by, the lion was sitting on the end of the bed. He looked at him, "Never again . . ." he said, "He won't remember a word I have said, or at least he will never believe it . . . and you are not going to tell him . . ."  

Keroberos sighed, "You have a lot of problems, Clow . . ."

Clow nodded, still staring at Yue as he completed the spell, "That I have . . ." he drew a quick breath, "I've made the worst mistake of my life . . . and I will always regret it . . ." he looked at Keroberos, the guardian's eyes reflected sympathy and regret too, "But I wonder is this . . .?"

"It's the right decision . . ." Keroberos padded closer and sat beside his creator, he put a heavy paw on his arm, together they stared down at Yue, who slept on; unaware of the pain Clow was suffering.

"It's the right one . . ." 

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Clow: [falls to knees] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Yue: What's wrong?

Keroberos: [jabs Clow in ribs] Shh! He doesn't remember!

Clow: [sniffles] Yue please leave for moment . . . [Yue shrugs and steps out for a second, Clow turns on DrM] I was so close, how could you?!

DrM: 'Cause I am a wimp and can't write really good yaoi! Everyone else's is soooo much better . . . and anyway . . . it's so much angsty when you don't get any . . .

Clow: bitch . . . bitch, bitch, bitch! And for the dude at the back taking notes, Dr Megalomania is a bitch!

DrM: [chuckles] And your point is? [Turns to readers] I know, I know . . . not enough . . . but come on; I had to get the title in somewhere! And a big arigato to Mateem Bluewing's 'Season Kaleidoscope' and Beautiful Midnight's 'Winged Salvation' for the sensitive wings thing . . . If you haven't read those story, go, go now . . . yes, *now* and read it . . . and then come back later and leave me a review . . . please? Oh, and then go back and leave both a review and Demand that A. Mateem add more 'cause it finished prematurely and B. Winged Salvation get updated!! . . . what can I say? I'm really impatient . . . what have you go to say, Clow?

Clow: [grouchy] Please R&R and demand she re-write it! Or better yet, demand that she finish writing and post the next part of unrequited 'cause I've seen that and I definitely get it on there!! [Sighs] But still give the hard-nosed, wimpy bitch a review anyway . . . [Pointedly] even though she should be shot for wimping out again . . .

 DrM: [Sighs]

Clow: What now?

DrM: This is the last DrM bit for this story . . .because well, I can really explain it, but it's the run up to the last chapter and the set up to the next story . . . so I can't really put any author's notes on the end of the next four chapters . . .

Clow: [to Kero and Yue] Bet she breaks and adds a chapter dedicated purely to A/N's! [Yue and Kero nod]

DrM: Bet I don't!

Kero: Ah, no . . . She'll break before then and fix it so she can put author's notes on it anyway . . .

DrM: You're so mean! [To reader] Please R&R!! Until next time, Hon na na!!


	22. Snowflakes

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twenty-One: Snowflakes

Yue strolled down the hallway to the stairs, he check his robes one more time before descending the stairs. It was Christmas; Keroberos had announced this fact as he always did, by running down the hallway yelling at the top of his lungs, "IT'S CHRISTMAS!!" 

Yue smiled, he did enjoy the holiday, as he did his false form's birthday. He walked down the stairs, wondering where Keroberos and Clow had disappeared. Yue had woken up in Clow's bed alone, he lay there for a few moments just breathing in the warm scent of Clow that infused the bed. He wished he hadn't slept so long, and wished even more that he could have woken up before Clow. He would have just lain there and watch the powerful magician sleep. He paused and shook his head, it would not do if he continually fantasised about his creator, his feelings would simply never be returned, and Clow would just smile at him and repeat that Yue's love for him was merely that a pet would feel for his master. He sighed and walked down, he was going to the kitchen to get some to eat, but stopped in the entrance hall. 

He clasped his hands behind his back and bit his lip, "But first . . . A little detour . . ." 

He walked briskly into the downstairs study, checking that no one saw him as he rushed over to the window. It had been snowing last night and he wondered if it would be snowing today. Yue sighed as the window revealed that the snow had stopped. His shoulders drooped, "It's *not* Christmas without snow . . ." He sighed and almost turned away from the portal, when something caught his eye. He blinked; it was a single snowflake, a single white pure snowflake drifted just in front of his face. 

"It's snowing . . ." he lifted his hand and caught it just on the tip of his finger, ". . . inside?"

Another snowflake danced impossibly and tantalisingly in front of him. He watched it, somehow knowing not to touch it, as it drifted over his shoulder. 

"Hello Yue . . ." Clow smiled from the doorway, he was dressed in his full robes, his large hat rested easily on his dark hair, and a long purple scarf was tightly secured around his neck. Yue smiled and bobbed a bow quickly, "Ohayo." 

Clow smiled warmly again and moved into the middle of the room, he beckoned Yue closer as he called his staff into existence. When Yue was stood just a few inches away Clow smiled, "Merry Christmas, Yue . . ." Yue gasped, as Clow leant forward and gently brushed a kiss over his forehead. " . . . And happy birthday . . ."

Yue blushed slightly as Clow smiled at him again, "Thank you."

"You haven't seen your gift yet . . ." Clow held out his hand and caught another snowflake on the tip of his finger, "I hope you like it . . ." Yue raised a question eyebrow as Clow looked upwards.

Yue tipped his head back, he blinked and his mouth fell slowly open. Above him was the Snow spirit of the Clow cards. She smiled and did a little twirl in the air, causing a small drift of snow to fall lightly on them. Yue looked at Clow, who smiled. He tapped his staff on the ground quietly, and looked up again. Yue stared up again; the snow was gathering small clouds.

"Happy birthday . . ." Clow lifted his hand again and traced Yue's raised sharp jaw, the angel couldn't see the wistful, hungry look pass over his creator's deep eyes, "My little moonbeam . . ."

The clouds exploded and it began to snow heavily on the magician and his creation, Yue spread his wings and fluttered them slightly, "It's snowing . . . Keroberos! Come look! It's snowing!!"

"Oh no!" Keroberos growled from the doorway, "I hate snow! I'm not setting foot in there!"

Clow laughed as his cards suddenly sprang from his robes and headed straight for the growling lion, "No! Clow! Call off your bloody cards! I'm not—"

The cards pushed him vehemently into the room as Clow laughed and watched Yue spread his arms and spin in the snow. "It's snowing!" The moon angel laughed, he stopped spinning and rushed over to Clow. "Thank you!"

Clow grinned and bowed, "May I have this dance?"

Keroberos growled and snapped at the cards, "Hopeless enchanted imps! Get off me!" As Yue and Clow laughed and danced around the snow filled room, Yue thought, //This is my best birthday . . . My best since he created me . . .//

Three years later, one winter's night. 

"Clow . . ." 

Clow opened his eyes and sat up in his bed. He could tell instantly that it was a vision, as Eriol sat on the edge of his bed. "Hello Eriol . . . what have you come to tell me?"

Eriol smiled slightly, he sighed and looked at Clow, "I think you know."

Clow nodded, he looked out his window; it was snowing lightly again. "It's time for me . . ." he looked at Eriol, "Isn't it?"

"Aye . . ." Clow almost gasped as Marcibay stepped out of the shadows, "Laddie . . . it's time to leave."

"You're here?" Clow smiled as he stepped out of the bed and grasped Hilligans' hand, "Why have you never come back to see me before?"

"Because it is not the practice of the dead to haunt the living!" Clow's mother said as she, his father and his uncle joined them. She smiled, "You have done so well my son . . . but now your work is done."

Clow sat back on his bed, "My creations . . .?"

"Well taken care of." Li Hei-ying stepped forward; his almost black brown eyes were glinting in the moonlight. "The next life awaits you."

Clow's father smiled as he sat beside his son, "You have other tasks to tend to . . . but your time has done . . . today . . ." he glanced at the clock, "Today is the last day of your mortal life . . ."

"Master?!" Yue blinked in surprise, this was hardly the birthday present he was expecting this year, "What do you mean?!"

"This is a joke right?!" Yelled Keroberos, furious and shocked, "You're kidding."

Clow was sitting there as if he had just announced that tea was ready, Yue didn't understand how could he say such a thing so easily, his eyes widened as Clow smiled and repeated, "This is no joke. Today I shall leave this life."

Yue managed not to stumble as he walked over to the window, usually seeing the snow falling softly in the night made him happy, but tonight . . . he could feel Keroberos look at him as he growled at Clow, "Today? This minute? Tonight? Or perhaps a quick cup of tea, maybe a bit of crumpet then you'll just pop your clogs?!" Keroberos was so angry at Clow, it had only been last year when he had separated the last two cards to them, Yue had gotten the Dark and Keroberos the Light, and now Clow was announcing that he was going to die?! It wasn't fair, he hadn't given them an inch of warning, not a single warning, Keroberos didn't mind, but Yue deserved something, he was in love with Clow. "That's what you've always been, Clow, damned stubborn!" Keroberos glanced at Yue again; his brother still stared out the window, "What about . . .?"

The angel glared at Keroberos over his shoulder, silently warning him not to continue. Keroberos cast one angrier look at Clow before stalking out of the room, evidently beyond expressing his fury civilly. //How could he do this? To the both of us?// He growled silently as he ran up the stairs, //To Yue who almost died because of his love for him?!//

Yue looked at the doorway and seriously considered leaving, he didn't want to hear this, didn't want to hear Clow tell him he was leaving again. He bit on his lip and looked at Clow, "You're going to leave us . . . leave me?" He stepped hesitantly closer, "why? Master, why are you leaving me?" 

Clow smiled warmly, "I am so tired of this life," he explained calmly, "I *need* to go." 

Yue looked down at the floor as he tried to absorb this fact. "Why? Why would you want to . . . unless . . . Are we the—?"

"No." Clow answered simply. "You're not the reason . . . neither of you have ever brought a single moment of unhappiness to my life."

Yue didn't understand this, his conflicting emotions battled each other, he should have just been able to smile and nod and say 'yes master', accept it, live with it, but then his heart felt like it was breaking, Clow was leaving them, but he was happy, it didn't make any sense. He fell to his knees beside Clow's chair, and picked up his creator's hand, "Then why?" The angel sobbed finally.

Clow murmured his response, "Because I am sick of knowing everything that has happened, that is happening, that will happen." 

"But I love you!" Yue cried then flinched, he had committed a terrible sin. He looked down in shame; he shouldn't have said that, he waited for Clow to laugh with amusement; instead Clow slid his fingers under the angel's chin and pulled it up gently. "I knew this as well;" Yue blinked at him, wanting to ask why Clow had never said, but remained silent sensing there was more, "But I also know that one day you will fall in love with another, and he will be more than I ever could be to you . . ." 

"No-one . . ." Yue was appalled, he shook his head, he didn't want Clow to say any of this, "Never . . . nobody . . . I'll do anything, just please don't leave me . . ." Clow petted him on the head, as he did whenever Yue was upset.

"There's nothing you can do, for it has already been decided . . ." Clow smiled, a hint of sadness in his eyes, "My beloved . . ." he closed his eyes quickly and swallowed as a smile quirked at his lips.

 ". . . Yue . . ."

Every Story Must Have A Beginning . . .

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

[Silence from all]

Kero: Told ya she'd break!

DrM: Shut it you . . . Clow just popped his clogs!

Clow: I did?! Hey, If I'm dead then how come . . .?

DrM: [types quickly]

Ghost of Clow Reed: Oh . . . [growls] you bitch!

Yue: [Wails] He left me!!

Kero: Oh, don't worry . . . he'll just come back and back and back and back and back . . .

DrM: Like the Durracell bunny?

Kero: Got it in one.

Ghost of Cow Reed: Please R&R . . . [Notices Mateem Bluewing sniggering and pointing at his name, reads screen name] HEY!!

DrM: [shakes head] that's what you get is you watch CardC[r]aptors at the same time as writing. . .


	23. And Every Story Must Have A Middle . . .

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twenty-Two: And Every Story Must Have A Middle . . .

[THANK YOU!! YAY! 100 REVIEWS!! YAY!! TAHNKOO THANKOO THANKOO!!!]

****IN THE TIME BEFORE THE CARDCAPTOR****

//Perfect . . .//

A wooden walking cane sharply tapped excitedly on the hard wood floor of the bookshop. She smiled as her long search had come to an end, //Simply perfect// She shuffled towards the service desk, glancing briefly at nearby newspapers. She made a mental note to stay away from Poland; it had just been invaded and added to the 'Motherland' that was Germany. She smiled harshly, the Jewish quarter of the magic community would no doubt be a little perturbed by Herr Hitler's activities. "Perfect . . ." As long as England wasn't involved she didn't mind, she could proceed with the next step of her search. She looked up at the clerk. "I wish to purchase this book . . ."

"Of course, ma'am . . ." the clerk blinked as the old woman handed over her desired item, "Oh . . . I'm sorry ma'am, but I should warn you . . . this book can't be opened . . . Nobody has ever been able to open it."

"I know . . ." The woman's dark eyes seemed younger than her years; "I still wish to purchase it."

The book clerk nodded and completed the transaction, as soon as the old woman had shuffled out of the door, he turned to his co-worker, "Did you just see that? Someone *actually* bought that old book!"

The old woman rounded a corner, into a secluded alleyway. Checking she was alone, she straightened and dispersed the spell that was making her look so old. She glanced into a nearby puddle, her curling black hair restored and her pale face free of wrinkles again, she smiled and reached up to her neck. She pulled out her necklace, it was a rose and a dragon pendant, she smiled harshly as she held it before her, "O, key of darkness, I, Mystrasa Kyree, command thee under our contract, reveal the staff to me." She spat brutally, "Release!"

The gold and black staff grew, and it sparked as it released her Sun guardian. The tiny form of the dragon grinned viciously as it landed on her shoulder.

"You found him?" It hissed as it coiled it's whip long tail on her other shoulder.

She held up the book, "Of course!" she grinned, "Hei-ying . . ." she stroked the black book's cover, "My loving uke . . . I've finally found you . . ."

//Perfect . . .//

Kinomoto Fujitaka sighed; he'd forgotten his notes again. //Simply perfect!// He stacked his books quickly before stepping out into the school's courtyard. It simply would not do to keep this practice up; he was constantly forgetting his lecture notes. "Perfect . . ." As a fledgling teacher, it was not a good habit to maintain. He smiled as he spotted one of his students, the athletic girl was yelling up into the branches of a Sakura tree. "Get down! Please get down here now! You'll hurt yourself!"

"I'll be fine!" A soft voice called back, "I'm almost there!"

Fujitaka smiled again, as he realised it was probably Nadeshiko, the grey haired, emerald eye girl was the complete opposite of her agile cousin. She was constantly having accidents, he chuckled slightly when he mused, she would probably fall out of that tree. 

//Might as well get it over and done with . . .// 

"Eh?" Fujitaka blinked as the strange thought compelled him over to the tree, he glanced at Nadeshiko's cousin, wondering why he was standing under the tree waiting for something to happen. A loud snap from above made him look up, a scream and a few seconds later he was rubbing his head.

"Gomen!" A musical voice said, "Kinomoto-sensei! I'm so sorry did I hurt you?"

Her long grey locks, and beautiful wide eyes unexpectedly reminded some forgotten part of him of someone else, Fujitaka suddenly felt endeared to this girl, "I thought an angel had fallen on me . . ."

//Perfect . . .//

Within a day, their wings had given way, within a week they were aware of him, within a month Ruby Moon was crawling after her brother, Spinel Sun, having discovered his weakness with sweets. //Simply perfect!//

He sat back in his chair, and clasped his hands in his lap, "Perfect . . ." he peered at his feet. //Funny . . . Last time I sat in this chair my feet actually reached the floor . . .// he smiled as he heard a crash from the door. Spinel Sun came flying through the door and dived into his arms, "Master! Make her stop!"

Eriol looked over at Ruby Moon, who grinned in the door, which had the appearance of an eight-year-old girl, despite the fact he had given her no specific gender. "Ruby, it isn't nice that you . . ."

He blinked as he felt something from his other reincarnation, he smiled warmly as he realised what had happened. "Master?" Ruby stepped up to her six-year-old master, his body may have been young, but he had their mansion under a time spell. He would have been twenty by now if he didn't live within its boundaries. "What is it?"

"Good choice . . ." Eriol breathed, he smiled warmly, "Sakura . . . Welcome to the world . . ."

"Master?" Spinel sat up and peered at him, Eriol had done this before, only he had said 'Oh, so it's you, Touya? You will take my Little Moonbeam away . . .'

Eriol blinked again, "The Cardcaptor . . ." he announced, " . . . has just been born . . ."

Spinel and Ruby glanced at each other; Hiirawagizawa Eriol could be very strange at times.  They had once found him peering into a pond and chuckling, when he sat up again he had muttered, "Yet another mistake, Clow . . . I shouldn't remember everything, nor have all of the power . . ." 

. . . And Every Story Must Have A Middle . . .

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Blue Goo: Wow! What am I doing in the Author's Notes? I'm not the author!

Clow: Well, DrM's a little too . . . *tied* up shall we say . . .? [Laughs evilly at Yue and Kero] 

[Door slams open]

DrM: Clow Reed! You are dead! And Kero and Yue! [Snaps fingers] You're not even *in* this chapter!

Kyree: Evil! Evil! Eeeevil! [Smells self] Smell that? That's the stench of evilality!

DrM: Could just be me . . .

Blue Goo: That's my line! [Sighs] Nyahhh it's no good! It's . . . ending . . . Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-

[DrM slaps for head]

Blue Goo: -ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-

DrM: So Fuji . . . how are you?

Bluegoo: oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-

Fujitaka: . . . I'm . . . okay . . . [looks at Blue Goo] . . . Is she . . .?

DrM: Certified . . . Oh, yeah . . . [Holds up insane certificate proudly] Same place as me! [Grins]

Bluegoo: [Gives DrM the thumb's up] -ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Ruby: [Quietly backs away] Master . . .?

Spinel: I think it might be a good idea to tell the readers to R&R, then back away . . . back away slowly . . . sloooooowllllyyyy. . .

Eriol: [Pouting] That Kyree bitch has got my aftershave!


	24. But Must Every Story . . .

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! 

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twenty-Three: But Must Every Story . . .

****IN THE TIME OF THE CARDCAPTOR****

The capture had gone well, it was his first as an adviser but he was confident that what he had learned from his own learnings would suffice for the new Cardcaptor. He couldn't sleep, so he fluttered up to the windowsill. It was no way as comfortable as the window seat in Clow's study, //That *was* in Clow's study// he revised. He sighed, he wasn't tired at all, //How can you sleep after spending the last thirty years dead to the world?//

He gazed at his false form's reflection in the glass, he was glad Clow had chosen this form, the little girl was panicky and would no doubt find his true form slightly scary. //It's still cooler than this one!// he thought obstinately. He sighed and looked at the little girl who Clow had predicted would be the Mistress of his Cards, he cocked his head, he had been expecting the Cardcaptor to be . . . more brave, bold, courageous, filled with a huge desire to tame the Cards but instead . . . //So you are the Cardcaptor . . .// Keroberos stood on the small windowsill and stared down at the sleeping girl, //Cardcaptor Sakura . . . sounds perfect!// he smiled, and looked out into the night, the Moon was just a sliver of light in the bejewelled night's sky. He felt a pang of sadness, "Yue . . ." 

The Clow book hovered nearby, as the Windy and the Fly joined him on the ledge.  They faced the window as if to gaze at the clear night, Keroberos threw a glance at back of the book; Yue's symbol was missing. It had been missing for nearly ten years, Clow had cast a spell so when the Cardcaptor had been born Yue's false form would seek her out. Keroberos struggled to remember what the false form's name was, "Rabbit . . . or snow or something like that," He muttered, he quirked an eyebrow at the sound of his voice, the Osaka accent he acquired made him sound slightly different but he enjoyed it. 

He gazed at the Cardcaptor again, "I will not fail Clow . . . and I will never fail you, Sakura . . . never."

Sakura was much braver than she showed, Keroberos was very proud of her as she conquered every Card that threatened her. He started to think about the final judgement and how Yue would manifest himself. At first he had thought that Sakura's new teacher . . . he frowned as he tried to remember her name, "Something Kaho . . ." He muttered. Keroberos (or as Sakura and Tomoyo had taken to calling him, Kero-chan) looked over at Sakura, her hand had slipped off the bed and was holding Tomoyo's as the two little girls slept. 

Tomoyo was responsible for the shortening of his name; he didn't like it at first. It made him sound like some sort of frog, however it was infinitely better than the insult that the Gaki had taken to calling him. Kero glared out of the window, he might actually like that Li kid if he didn't insist on using the one, most painful insult that reminded him of the thing that would have advised Sakura. He looked at her again, she reminded him of . . . he snorted slightly, she reminded him of his little brother, Yue, so full of life and giggles. It was nice to be around such a happy person again, Sakura wasn't the only happy person that was in the house tonight, he thought as he looked at the wall that was between Sakura's and Touya's rooms. It was an all-round sleep over thing, as Touya had brought one of his friends around to sleep as well. 

Tsukishiro Yukito, the snow rabbit, was sleeping over again on one of their study nights. Kero frowned, the name sounded so familiar, he knew that Yue's other form was called Yukito but he couldn't remember the last name Clow had given the small boy. Keroberos shook his head, Tsukishiro didn't look that much like Yukito, his hair was straighter, shorter and a darker grey. Also, Yue's false form had perfect vision, Tsukishiro couldn't see past the end of his nose without his wide glasses. Keroberos sighed, besides he couldn't feel any magic from Tsukishiro. "He couldn't be Yue . . ." He muttered as he stared at the wall harder, "Datte . . ."

A few months later, Keroberos finally gave into his curiosity. Touya's best friend reminded him of something . . . he fluttered quietly into the bedroom where the two were sleeping. Keroberos smiled, so the two *were* lovers, Touya had been very careful to keep this fact a secret. He fluttered over the bed and peered at Tsukishiro. //White Castle?// there was something so familiar about him, his gentle face, his peaceful smile. . .

"Could you be . . .?" He began but something else brushed against his senses, he flew straight back to Sakura's room, he sensed a Clow Card!

The Final Judgement was over. 

Keroberos sighed a breath of relief, Sakura had won and Yue was just performing the closing spell. He glanced at Kaho, and wondered when Clow had made the strange bell she had used. Why didn't Clow tell them that he thought Sakura might fail first time? He chuckled slightly as he realised that Clow might have actually taken in some of Keroberos' concerns instead of just believing that Sakura would be instantly powerful enough to defeat Yue. He looked up as Sakura reappeared some distance off. He let Tomoyo and the Li boy take care of her; he had someone else to see. He bounded towards the magic aura he had missed for so long, once he spotted him, his large wings spread and carried him to his missing brother.

Yue was sitting on a nearby roof, watching Sakura. //She looks nothing like Clow// he reflected, //Touya does though . . .// he frowned as the thought crossed his mind again, //Just because Yukito is his lover it doesn't mean that I must be as well//

"All is well." A deep voice rumbled beside him, "And as Clow predicted, Sakura is the new Card Mistress."

"Hmmm. . ." Yue hummed before looking at Keroberos, he raised a teasing eyebrow while keeping a perfectly straight face, "And you've put on some weight . . ."

"I did say that if you didn't cook for me, I'd just ask her to provide me with an unending supply of pudding!" Keroberos snorted, "And besides, you've become very serious . . . whatever happened to . . ." He pranced up and down slightly, "It's snowing! It's snowing! Keroberos! Let's go play in the snow!"

Yue frowned; "I've never done that!" 

"Yes, you have!" Keroberos rubbed his head affectionately under his younger brother's chin, "And what's this about you and Touya?"

"There is nothing between the Mistress' brother and me . . . it is merely Yukito's infatuation."

Keroberos chuckled, "I almost didn't recognise you . . . since when did Yukito need glasses?"

"He doesn't, he just thinks he does . . . and you didn't recognise me . . . you thought I was that Moon priestess." He glanced at Keroberos when his elder brother didn't answer, "Nani?"

Keroberos looked at him warmly, "I missed you so much little one . . ."

"I'm not little . . ." Yue smiled, "And I missed you too Oniichan . . . although . . . I don't remember you ever talking like that . . . is that Osaka?"

Keroberos grinned and looked at Sakura, "She has done well, she will make an excellent Mistress."

"It looks just like the one in England!"

Ruby looked around the new house; she dropped her bags on the hard wood floor, and stepped forward. Her child Master was just behind her, she peered down at him as he followed her in, he now looked like a ten year-old, where as she had fully grown. She had the appearance of an 18-year old girl, or so she had decided.

"I know . . ." Eriol carried in his bags, "It's perfect!"

Ruby frowned, "We moved all the way to Japan to live in a house that looks exactly like our old one?"

"It's not exactly the same!" Spinel fluttered in, his small plushie form almost unbearably cute with it's tiny clear butterfly wings and large head, "It's missing the upper three floors . . ."

Eriol smiled again, "It's perfect . . . and the better thing is they won't really recognise it!"

Ruby blinked, "They? You mean the other two?"

Eriol nodded, "The new Card Mistress will have a few days' reprieve to rest from the battle with my Moonbeam, and then we will start playing with her."

"We have a new transfer student . . . he comes from England, everyone please give a warm welcome to Hiirawagizawa Eriol . . ." The teacher turned to the tall blue haired boy, "Please introduce yourself to the class."

"Certainly," Eriol smiled as he turned to face the class of fourth formers. He quickly searched their faces, looking for his cute little descendant, the Cardcaptor and the Cardcaptor's best friend. He smiled as soon as he spotted the unmistakeable emerald eyes of the Cardcaptor. "Hello . . . I'm Hiirawagizawa Eriol; it's a pleasure to meet all of you!"

He quickly bowed as the class echoed his greeting, the teacher quickly scanned the room, "Umm . . . there is a place beside Li Syaoran, please sit there."

"Hai!" Eriol beamed, //Perfect!// he was going to sit behind the Cardcaptor's best friend and right next to his cute little descendant. He couldn't help but pause as he came to the Cardcaptor; he smiled as he looked at her. He had waited so long to meet her; it was more of his past life speaking as he beamed at her, "Hello Sakura!"

She blinked at him, and the little descendent glowered at him; he smiled at the descendant and could sense the boy had growing feelings for her. He memorised this fact, knowing that his descendant's love for the Cardcaptor would help her someday, he would encourage it, he decided. He glanced at the best friend; she smiled at him in a way that made him blink. She had a very pretty smile, kind and full. He smiled to himself as he sat. These three would be quite interesting to get to know, Sakura, Syaoran and . . . he glanced up at the long purple hair of the girl in front of him, the scent of lavender drifted from it . . . and Tomoyo . . .

"We have a new transfer student . . . she comes from England . . ." Touya glanced at Yukito; the snow rabbit had always struck him as British. He wondered if maybe in some past life, Yuki had once lived there. Touya smiled as his double vision allowed him to briefly see the being that lived inside of Yuki. This angel-like being blinked and turned his head to look at Touya, a few seconds later Yuki did the same thing. "Nani?" He whispered.

"Nothing . . ." Touya smiled, the being blinked again then fell back asleep, sometimes, just sometimes the being would stay awake much longer and continue to stare at him. When he had first met Yuki, he had thought this being was some sort of soul eater, but quickly realised the being was very benevolent. In fact it seemed like Yuki was hiding him, even though Yuki wasn't aware that his body was part of someone else's. He glanced up at the new student; she was staring at Yuki as if she had just found him. She was like Yuki, Touya realised, and she was hiding someone else as well. He blinked, as her attention fell on him, her lip curled slightly into a smile, she had found something else of interest.

"Please introduce yourself to the class."

"Hello! I'm Akizuki Nakuru! It's such a pleasure to meet all of you!" She glanced at Yuki again and smiled. Touya frowned, she'd better not try and seduce Yuki . . . because for one thing Yuki wasn't that way inclined, second he was taken and third, he was Touya's koi, and no-one else's.

Yue looked up at the damage the giant teddy bear had caused to Yukito's home, //How am I going to convince Yukito that *this* isn't anything to worry about?//

"That strange presence is back again!" Keroberos growled. Yue understood why Keroberos was so angry, whatever it was, the presence seemed to be mimicking Clow's aura.

Unaware he was being watched, Yue looked around. Eriol and his guardians watched them from a nearby building, "That's them?" Ruby smiled, "They don't look so fearsome."

"Not every thing that is dangerous looks that way . . ." Spinel muttered, "That seemed a little subtle for your tastes, Master.

"I thought I'd start small and work up from there . . ." Eriol smiled, he stared at Yue. He knew he shouldn't, after all he had been lecturing Ruby and Spinel to ensure that they didn't reveal their presence to his former life's guardians but he couldn't resist it. He hadn't been so close to Yue in such a long time. He closed his eyes and thought the idea very quietly to Yue.

//Little One . . . I miss you . . .//

Yue's head snapped upward, //Papa?!// 

"What is it?"" Keroberos asked. Yue glanced at him and shook his head.

"It's. . ." Yue paused, he had never called Clow 'Papa' before, and this presence seemed too much like Clow, perhaps it was just his imagination. ". . .nothing. . ."

As Keroberos went to check on Sakura and her purple haired friend, Yue looked up at the Moon, the strange thought had provoke a respond, and while he didn't dare say it aloud, he did think it back just as quietly.

Eriol smiled as Yue's response came to him, //Clow . . . I miss you too . . .// Spinel and Ruby followed Eriol obediently as he turned and they returned to their home once more.

It was raining outside heavily, and normally he would have been aware of the rain spirits dancing on their roof, but since the transfer . . .

Touya gasped as he awoke. He no longer had his powers but he could feel when someone was breathing just a few centimetres away from his face. 

"Why does everyone do that when I appear?" Yue muttered as he fluttered away from Touya, he landed softly on the floor at the end of the bed. Touya sat up, "Maybe because you do it so unexpectedly?"

Yue's only response was to make his wings disappear; he folded his arms and gazed at Touya. Touya swung his feet to the floor, "Why are you here? Is Sakura all right?" 

"The Mistress is fine . . . in fact she has not needed to call me . . ." Yue glanced at the door; "I do not believe she is aware I am here."

"Why are you here then?" Touya shrugged into a dressing gown. Yue put a hand on his hip and gazed at Touya, he blinked and turned away, "I . . . do not know . . ."

"Is everything all right with Yuki?"

Yue stared out the window at the full Moon, magic suffusing his body. He closed his eyes and took it all in, "I'm fine, To-ya . . ." 

Touya blinked, for a moment there he couldn't tell which of them was speaking, he cautiously approached Yue. Yukito had just found out that he was also Yue, and he had asked Touya to speak to Yue when he had the chance. "Are you sure?"

Yue nodded, he even chuckled slightly, "Are you developing a Yukito-complex?" He turned and smiled at Touya, teasing in the exact tone of voice Yukito did. Touya smiled, so the true self wasn't as different from the false self at all. 

"Not at all . . . it's just Yukito asked me to—"

"Check up on me the first chance you got . . . I know; I was there too."

"You are aware when we're—"

"Yue held up a hand, yes I am . . ." He smiled, "I don't mind and I hope you don't either. Yukito enjoys it a lot, I-- he would be saddened if you became uncomfortable with me . . ." He straightened his robes before sitting on the edge of the bed, a moment of silence past before Touya sat beside him.

"Why are you here?"

"I want to know why I am . . . I mean why Yukito is so attracted to you . . . he's supposed to be attracted to Sakura."

"Pardon me?" 

"We're supposed to be attracted to Sakura because of her power, like Keroberos is, only more so . . ." Yue looked at him, "Why are you . . . why did this . . ." Yue raised his hand and stroked Touya's cheek, he seemed mesmerised by the dark haired boy, "How did you do this to me?"

Touya laced his fingers with Yue's; "I don't know . . . you tell me."

Yue pulled his fingers away and stood, he glided over to the window silently, "I said I would never fall in love with anyone ever again . . . why have you done this to me again?"

Touya stood, "Who did before?"

Yue's expression softened as he gazed out on the rain, "My creator."

"You were in love with Clow."

"I *am*. I am in love with Clow."

"But he's dead." Touya moved behind Yue, and placed a light hand on the middle of Yue's back. "And there's no real chance of him ever coming back is there?"

Yue shivered as Touya started to rub his back in slow circles. "No. . . there isn't. . ." he turned unwillingly, "But I don't want to forget him. . ."

Far above them on the roof, Eriol was listening with a degree of sadness. Yue wasn't playing the right game. He closed his eyes; Yue was safe now from Sakura's lack of power. He smiled as he sent the fragmented memory to Yue.

//But don't worry, while I won't be able to show you how much you mean to me . . . you will be well taken care of, you will find a love so much better deserving of you . . . because there will be someone else you will love, someone else, another . . . someone purer than this tainted soul . . . and he will take my place within your heart . . .// Eriol smiled, as he added one more piece to the memory, //Please allow him . . . it would hurt me so much to know that you are not happy . . . let him. . .// Eriol sighed, part of him never wanted to let go, be selfish and take his angel back to be his once more, and the consequences be damned, //Let him heal you . . .//

Yue stared at Touya, //Please// at first he resisted as Touya put his arms around him, //Please allow// Touya smiled, and laced his fingers in Yue's thick hair. Yue's eyes slid shut as Touya started to kiss him lightly, //Please allow him//. Maybe it was so wrong of him, maybe Clow would understand, //it would hurt me so much// maybe Touya would help, help him get over the pain in his heart that Clow had caused when he left, //hurt me so much to know// maybe Touya would love him, maybe //so much to know// Touya could love the both of him, //to know that// maybe even one day . . . he and Yukito could be one again . . . //know that you// he let himself be pulled towards the bed, maybe just for tonight, Yue and Yukito could be one again. . . //it would hurt me so much to know that you// one again. . . just for one night. . . //know that you are not happy. . .// . . .one with Touya. . . just one night. . . //let him. . .// one night together, and the pain would be. . . //heal you. . .//

"I love you . . ." Yue raised his hand, as Touya laid him back gently, he traced the usually serious brows, and stared wonderingly into the deep sapphire eyes, ". . .Touya."   

The light was almost blinding as Eriol's powerful spell was revoked, he smiled proudly at Sakura. "Well done!" He clapped, "Very well done!!"

She had done it; she had transformed the last few Sakura Cards, and had managed to beat him. He glanced at his own guardians, Ruby and Spinel as they looked at him confused. "I thought you wanted to beat her!"2 Ruby cried out.

"No. . . I wanted to help her . . ." Eriol leapt off the shrine's gate and landed softly. Ruby and Spinel followed, they all waited patiently as Yue and Keroberos returned from the staff. Sakura regarded him warily. "Why did you do this?"

"Because I knew you had to change the Cards . . . and I wanted to help you . . ." he looked at Keroberos and Yue, "You've both grown a lot . . . "

Yue and Keroberos exchange a look then glared at him, "You are Clow Reed? You can't be!" Keroberos growled, "We saw you die!" 

"I know you did . . ." Eriol smiled, "I also know that for your last birthdays before that, I gave you the Light and Dark Cards . . . the first Card I gave you Keroberos was the Flower Card and for Yue the Glow . . ."

"You can't be him!" Yue spat, "He died!"

"I am not Clow, I am Eriol . . . but I am Clow's half reincarnation."

"Half reincarnation?" Syaoran slide his sword into its cover. 

"Yes, my cute little descendant . . ." Eriol smiled at him, he was very much like Clow's uncle. He looked at Ruby and Spinel; "These are my Sun and Moon guardians." He turned to Ruby and Spinel, "Ruby Moon and Spinel Sun . . . this is my past life's Sun and Moon guardians, from Clow's mother's side, the Li clan head Li Syaoran, my cute little descendant, Tomoyo is the Card Mistress' best friend, and chief provider of her wonderful costumes, and this is the Card Mistress . . . " Eriol turned stepped forward, he grasped her hand and gazed fondly at her, "Her name is Sakura . . . she's my daughter . . . "

Sakura blinked, "Hoe?! "

Eriol smiled, "Well, not my blood daughter, but most certainly my soul's . . . your father is the other reincarnation . . . "

Sakura blinked again, "Clow Reed . . . but why? "

"I had to make sure you changed the Cards . . . and, if you'll permit me to be a bit selfish . . . I wanted to meet you. " He smiled, "And I wanted to see how Yue and Keroberos had done . . . " He looked at them, "You have both grown so much . . . " he shook his head, "I wish I could have come sooner, to see you in your final judgement . . . " 

Yue glanced from Eriol to Ruby Moon, who walked up to him, "I guess this makes us siblings then . . . " She stuck out her hand, "My name's Ruby . . . this is my twin brother, Suppi."

"*Spinel*! My name is Spinel!" The large blue panther snapped, as Keroberos looked at him.

"You said your name was Suppi when we met," Keroberos chuckled, so now he had even younger siblings.

"Well, I lied. " Spinel glared at him, "My name is Spinel." 

Eriol chuckled, and pulled out his pocket watch, "Oh my!" He gasped, "We're late!"

"Late for what?" Cried Sakura as he grabbed her wrist and dragged her over to a pond.

"I didn't think it would take so long for you to figure it out!" He called out, "Come along all of you!"

"That sounds like Clow all right!" Grumbled Keroberos as the group gathered around the pond. Sakura gasped as she realised what was wrong with the water's surface. It wasn't reflecting the late evening's sky; the sky in the pond was a bright summer blue. "What the hell is this?" Syaoran called from the back. 

Eriol smiled, "It's something that needs to be done!" He touched the water lightly causing a slight ripple. The group gasped collectively as Clow Reed leaned over the water. The magician looked much younger than when Sakura had met him. 

Eriol turned to Sakura, "This is Clow . . . he doesn't know about you yet . . . "

"What do you mean?"

"Time is relative, the times we have met him before haven't happened to him yet . . . this is a long time before he figured out you and the judgement."

Ruby pushed forward and stared in amazement, "He does look a little like you . . . especially here in the eye depar—"

"No!" Yue quickly grabbed her arm, "You might make him disappear!"

Clow's expression was one of pure puzzlement, he looked like he didn't recognise anyone. He cocked his head at Yue, and a funny sort of smile crossed his face. He suddenly disappeared from the water.

"Where'd he go?!" Yue cried in disappointment. 

"I know . . ." Eriol got up and crossed to the other side of the water, he raised his hand and beckoned at the water, "Come back here."

He walked back to the group who were leaning closer to the water; he smiled as Clow leaned back into view. The magician smiled and waved at them. Yue sighed and leaned back slightly, Sakura giggled, "Look Tomoyo! This is Clow Reed! Can you see him through your camera?"

"Yes! This is incredible!" Tomoyo breathed as she focused her camera on the water. Eriol watched as Clow's attention wavered towards the digital camera, he smiled, //I probably don't know what one of those are// he leaned towards Tomoyo, making sure Clow could see his face clearly, he said slowly, "He doesn't know what it is, please . . . this is important, we can't let him be distracted by the camera." 

The group including his own guardians looked at him as if he'd just gone insane, Clow however looked at him questioningly and mouthed something at Eriol. 

"Why are you speaking so slowly?" Syaoran asked.

Eriol smiled briefly at Clow before answering Syaoran, "Because he can't hear us . . . it's just so he can lip-read what we're saying."

"Oh . . ." Syaoran frowned.

"What's he laughing at?" Ruby pulled the attention back to Clow, who was now laughing at the water.

Eriol smiled, "Go on . . ." he said clearly, "Tell them . . ."

Clow smiled and pointed at Syaoran, "He's my cute little descendant!"

Syaoran's eyes widened as Eriol laughed at the name, Eriol turned and shrugged, "I can't help it . . . you really are very cute . . ." he turned serious slightly, "Now it's very important you all leave . . . except for you, Sakura and Keroberos . . ."

Yue didn't look like he wanted to leave, "Please Yue . . . you can see him again soon . . . "

Yue nodded and withdrew from Clow's sight. Eriol smiled and motioned Keroberos to sit by him, Sakura sat on the other side, "What are you doing? "

Eriol smiled, and turned to her, he spoke with his hand covering his mouth from Clow. "He hasn't created Keroberos yet . . . so I'm going to give him a little clue . . . "

Keroberos snapped his head towards the reincarnation in shock, "What do you mean? "

"Lean closer to the water please . . . and say hello . . . "

Keroberos shrugged and did as he was told; he smiled widely to make Clow feel comfortable, "Konbanwa! "

Clow glanced at Eriol, then back at Keroberos. He mouthed something Keroberos didn't catch. He looked at Eriol for a translation, "What did he say? "

He said, "Who are you? "

"NANI?! " Keroberos' head snapped towards the reflection, "It's me! " He frowned, "MEEEEEEE!!! "

Clow didn't seem to understand as he looked from Eriol to Sakura, Sakura put her hand on Keroberos' shoulder, "He really doesn't know who you are . . . " She looked into the water, "Keroberos . . . Keehh—row—bear—ros! " She clarified. "Keroberos! " 

Clow mouthed the word back, and Keroberos nodded enthusiastically, "Keroberos! " He motioned at himself to make sure Clow was getting it right, "Keroberos! I'm the guardian beast of the—" he glared at Eriol as the blue haired boy clamped his hand over his mouth, he shook his head. 

Clow glared at Eriol as well as he demanded something that neither Sakura or Keroberos understood, Eriol smiled regrettably, and leaned towards Keroberos, "Tell him he will have to figure it out for himself . . . "

Once he released his muzzle, Keroberos leaned towards the water; "You will have to figure it out for yourself. "

Clow frowned again, and then mouthed something else, Eriol leaned towards Keroberos, "He wants to know when he will create you, say very clearly 'Whenever you decide it.' "

Keroberos sucked in a breathe, this moment would result in his own creation, he looked over his shoulder, "What about him? " Yue stood close by, unaware of the importance of the moment. Keroberos looked at Eriol who refused to say anymore, he just pointed at Clow, Keroberos looked at Clow's reincarnation, and then at Yue, then at Sakura, finally he looked down at Clow. Smiling as warmly as he could, Keroberos said as clearly as he could, "Whenever you decide it . . . "

Eriol smiled and nodded, he looked over at the rest of the group, "You can have one more look, if you like . . . "

Yue was the first there, he stared down at Clow, he hadn't seen him in so long. Clow stared back; he looked like he had never seen Yue before. Eriol raised his hand over the water, and Clow pulled his attention away from Yue to look at him, he mouthed something at Eriol, but Eriol paid no attention as he struck the water. The vision was gone.

"What was that? " Sakura turned to Eriol, who was smiling at his watch.

"That was Keroberos . . . in about three hours, we shall do Yue . . . "

"What are you talking about? " Keroberos turned to him.

"I am twenty-nine in that vision, in the three hours for us, for me in that time a few months will have past, and I will start to think about creating Yue. In fact, Keroberos do you remember that night when I couldn't stop saying 'Yue'? "

"Yeah I do . . . " Keroberos glanced at Yue, "Does this mean we will see him through the pond again? " He frowned, "No wait . . . Clow destroyed that pond when . . . "

"I know. " Eriol cut him off suddenly, "That is why we are going to call him into his study . . . "

Three hours past as the group got to know each other a little better, Ruby and Spinel were a little hesitant to Yue but Keroberos enjoyed the prospect of being an older brother to all of them. Eriol watched them fondly, and smiled as he felt Sakura approach him, "Are you really Clow Reed reborn? "

"Yes . . . I am . . . " he held up his hand, and clasped hers gently; "I am so pleased that you managed to get over all of my tasks. " He sighed, "It's time . . . Yue . . . "

The group went to the pool again, and stared down. The reflection was rippling slightly, deep violet ripples began to appear, Eriol smiled, his magic is creating the vision this time. "He has grown very strong now . . . Yue . . . please call him. "

Yue frowned slightly and knelt by the water edge, "Clow . . .? . . . Clow Reed? " The water still rippled, "Where are you? " He glanced at Eriol, who nodded, ". . . Clow Reed? "

Clow's voice echoed slightly, but was echoing in the wrong direction, instead of the last sound of the words being repeated, the first sound was. It almost sounded like he was talking backwards. "Who's there . . .? "

Eriol smiled, "Clow . . . come in. . . We're waiting for you . . . "

"Eriol?! " Clow's voice sounded faint, "Eriol? Is that . . .? "

"Yes . . . " Eriol smiled at the water as it turned black, it's rippled glowing even more, "Please . . . come in. . . "

There was a pause, and Eriol looked at Yue, Yue understood and spoke again, "Clow . . .? Are you here now? "

"Yes . . . " Eriol suddenly motioned everyone to get back, "Who's there? " The water rippled strongly and cleared, Clow was staring back now, and he looked like he was indoors.

Eriol smiled, "Konbanwa . . . how are you? "

"I am . . . fine . . . I wasn't expecting to see you so soon . . . "

"Time is relative . . . " Eriol explained swiftly, "The times we have met have not been in the same order as they have occurred to you . . . "

"Why can I talk to you now? " Clow smiled.

"You have become much more powerful since we last talked . . . you think so as well. " 

"How do you know . . .? "

Eriol smiled simply, "I just do . . . " 

As Sakura moved closer Eriol bent down quickly and had a very quiet conversation with Clow. She wondered what they were talking about; she glanced at Yue and hoped that all went well. She didn't want to lose him. She knelt by the water, "Hello Clow-sama . . . "

"Hello again. " Clow smiled warmly, he looked around the gathered group's faces, ". . . to all of you."

Ruby couldn't contain herself anymore, she leant closer to the water, "Are you really Clow Reed? "

"Mmm-Hmmm, " Clow nodded.

"Really? "

Eriol laughed slightly, as Spinel turned to her, "Of course, really."

Keroberos leaned over the water, "Hello Clow! How am I? "

Clow chuckled, "You're brilliant! " 

"I'm so handsome in my true form, aren't I? " Keroberos grinned.

Clow sniggered, "Yes, you are. "

Keroberos smiled fondly at him before turning to Eriol, seriousness now tainting his expression. "Now? "

Eriol smiled and started to nod, "Yes, Keroberos . . . now. " 

The group shuffled back as Yue stepped forward, he leant over the water. He glanced first at Keroberos, who nudged him, then at Eriol who smiled confidently. He took a deep breath and leaned closer to the water. "Hello Yue. " Clow murmured.

Yue gasped, "How did you . . .? "

"I guessed. " Clow answered simply, he looked utterly calm and knowing. It was time. 

Yue looked up at Keroberos, who put a paw on his shoulder and smiled. Yue looked back at Clow who, for reasons unknown to him, gasped. Clow composed himself instantly and asked, "When will you come into my life . . .? "

Yue felt unable to answer, knowing that his response would result in his creation. He lifted a trembling hand to the water and traced Clow's face just above the surface. His lips moving but making no sound, he was nearly overwhelmed. Clow was there, just there unaware of the future, unaware of his love for him. Keroberos patted Yue on the shoulder, "You don't have to say anything . . . you don't have to spend the rest of eternity with me or—"

"Keroberos! " Eriol lifted a finger to his lips to stop Keroberos from saying 'Sakura'; it wasn't the time to inform Clow of her name just yet, "Shh! " He looked at Yue, "It's time . . . "

Yue nodded, he seemed to be a little breathless now, "Whenever . . . " he murmured then paused, his eyes betrayed a sadness, "Whenever you decide it . . . "

Clow nodded, "I know . . . "  

"Clow . . . I . . . " Yue begun but was stopped by Eriol, "Please . . . I . . . " Eriol shook his head silently, and raised his hand to strike the water. "Demo . . . no, please let me--!"

Just as Eriol's hand struck the water, Clow raised his hand. Instead of disappearing the image remained, the water on their side rippled. Eriol looked at him with annoyance, he had certainly been very stubborn in his other life. Clow held his hand over the water as he raised himself to sit on his heels; he leant over the water to stare at Yue. He pressed his finger against his lips much like Eriol had done. "I will see you soon, Yue . . . you can tell me then . . . "

Yue swallowed, and nodded. "Sayonara. " He murmured, knowing that this would be the last time he'd ever see Clow.

"Iie. . . " Clow murmured, "Ja ne . . . because I will see you later. " Clow raise his hand off the image and nodded at Eriol. Eriol smiled appreciating, and raised his water to strike the vision into a close, he glanced at Yue. The Moon angel held his creator's eyes as long as he could before looking away. Yue didn't want to see Clow disappear from his life again. 

Shortly afterwards, Yue stormed away, and Touya had woken from the sleep that Eriol's powerful spell had cast over Tomoeda. 

"Yue, wait! " Touya called after him, he ran after his sister's Moon guardian, "Yue, please! "

"Go away! " Yue shouted as he walked into some bushes, there was a blue glow and Touya expected to see Yukito stumble out again, when there was no sign of the snow bunny, Touya went in to investigate. Yue's cocoon of feathers was floating over his ice blue magic circle. "Yue? "

"Leave me alone! "

"Yue! Come here, just let me . . . "

"I said leave me alone! " He sounded like he was upset. 

"Look, I can be just as stubborn as you! " Touya stood next to the cocoon, "You're upset and you're upsetting Keroberos, and Keroberos is upset so *both* of you are upsetting the kaijuu!"

"I'm not upset! "

"Then how come you stuck halfway through your transformation? " Touya tried to pry the wings apart. "What was it you saw in that pond? "

"I'm not stuck and that's none of your business! " Yue yelled through he feathers.

"Yue! Come out here this minute! " Touya snapped, he hadn't met much of Yue since he had given him his powers, Yukito wasn't best pleased when he found out about Yue but had slowly come to realise that the angel might be lonely. He had asked Touya to take care of his other form. Slowly, the two had become lovers, and with Yukito's consent, but that didn't stop Yue from hiding away a lot of the time. 

"Since when did I pronounce you the Card Master?! " Yue growled, "Go away! "

"Yue! Out or I'm coming in! " There was a pause as Yue tried to hide a laugh, Touya smiled as he realised that Yue was softening, "I'm deadly serious, I'm coming in, and then I'll drag you out if needs be! "

There was another pause before Yue's wings started to peel back, Yue stood, floating a few inches off the ground. He looked upset and amused at the same time, "I saw Clow. . . "

"Wasn't that good? "

Yue landed and made his wings disappear, he turned away, "It was, but then it wasn't. . . I . . . I . . . " he turned back to the dark haired boy, "I love you. " Touya blinked, as Yue turned away again.

"I love you too, " Touya wrapped his arms around Yue, "I've told you this so many times . . . I have always loved you and Yukito. Both of you mean everything to me. " 

Yue's face creased as Touya confessed this, "I know, I know, we both know . . . but Clow . . . "

The dark haired boy pulled a hand up and cupped Yue's cheek, he leant closer towards Yue, "He's gone . . . but I'm here, let me . . . "

Yue didn't let him finish as he pushed up on his toes and kissed Touya, he knew Touya was right, and somewhere in his mind he could hear Clow saying that this was all right, that by loving Touya made Clow happy. Touya smiled as he felt Yue deepen the kiss; perhaps this meant the angel was letting go of his past, and coming to accept Touya and his love . . .

. . . But Must Every Story . . .

-------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

Kero: We're Back!!

Yue: Yay us!

Sakura: ooooh . . . brand new A/N's to inhabit!

Syaoran: [folds arms] I don't trust that Eriol Bloke!

Eriol: What's there to not to tr. . . let me put that another way, what's there to trust?

Tomoyo: Hello Eriol! 

Eriol: Hanyannnnn!

Ruby: Uh, master?

Spinel: hoo-boy. . . so Bluest Of The Goo-est, how are you?

Blue gOo: Hey look! I got capitals! And. . . DrM. . . sweetie. . . darling. . . PUNDTUATE YOUR DARN WORK *A*S* YOU'RE WRITING!!

DrM: Okay. . . so we just spent the last hour punctuating this darn thing . . . [Shrugs] that's nothing! Anyway . . . anyone we didn't get in here?

Clow: ME!!

Meilin: AND ME!!

DrM: Clow baby you had all. . . *twenty* chapters of these damnable A/N's to say your piece! [Points at Meilin] and you have your *own* fic! [Clicks fingers and both disappear, DrM starts to cry] Okay . . . well, here it is . . . the real last A/N's for this fic, yep, that it there's no more after this except for one last chapter . . . [Sniff] so I'd like to say thank you to every one who has read and reviewed this fic, thank you even more for the 100+ reviews, and to assure you that Hei-ying, whether you love him . . .

Mystrasa: Awww! Hei-ying!

DrM: [raises eyebrow] . . . indeed . . . or loathe him . . .

Kero: THAT BASTARD!!

DrM: [raises other eyebrow] . . . indeed . . . or indeed have absolutely no memory of him . . .

Yue: huh?

DrM: [lack of eyebrows so calls The Rock and gets him to do The People's Eyebrow for her] . . . yeah, that too . . . whatever you feel about him, he will be back . . . in the sequel. . . 

In This Tainted Soul . . . There Lies Hope.

DrM: So until then. . . please R&R, please read the next chapter and R&R, and . . . [takes sweeping bow] Arigato my friends and Goodnight. . . Ja Ne. . . 


	25. . . . Have An End?

Well, Hello and welcome to my Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the official characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be! I *DO*, however, own Marcibay Hilligans and Hei-ying Reed!! I also own Mystrasa Kyree, and the Dragon isn't mine, it's on loan from my good friend, the Blue Goo! And what the heck . . . I own the mansion as well! [Laughs] Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! And I don't pretend to be able to write any sort of accents so please don't hate me!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

In This Tainted Soul . . .

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twenty-Four: . . . Have An End?

_[P.S. I do own the Phrase 'Every Story . . .', it's from my little mind, okay? Thank you for reading this, you can't believe how grateful I am for every single review, I thank you very much, and hope this is a suitable NON-ending to this story for you, Also Please don't forget to R&R!!] _

**** IN THE TIME AFTER THE CARDCAPTOR****

Fujitaka looked at his watch.

He shouldn't be doing this; he had a son a year *younger* than the student he was meeting. Sakura was just a few years younger than the new student, the gap between them could easily make them brother and sister. He closed his eyes, he *really* shouldn't be here.

Oh, but the student was very, very handsome. The instant the transfer student had entered the room; his unusual jade eyes had drawn Fujitaka. He knew the transfer student, who had arrived recently from England, had felt *something* too. He had offered to do every little chore, even went out of his way to bring Fujitaka coffee and snacks. Fujitaka smiled, the boy was very, very good at his studies as well, and it was always a pleasure to teach him. But that was what was getting to Fujitaka, he was dating one of his students again, not only that but he was dating one of his *male* students. He shook his head, and, despite knowing it was cruel, turned to leave. 

"Kinomoto-sensei . . .?" Fujitaka opened his eyes; the transfer student was standing just behind him. "I apologise for being late . . ." 

"It's all right."

"Were you about to leave?" The boy held up a small picnic basket, "I thought you might like something to eat . . . it's rather late."

It was ten o'clock in the night, his children had been told he was going to stay late at the university. Fujitaka sighed slightly, he had lied to them, he was actually was in the Tsukimine Shrine, meeting one of his male students. "Yes, it is . . . I am a bit hungry . . ." He smiled, "Shall we find somewhere to eat, Tsukishiro-kun?"

The jade-eyed student smiled again, "Of course."

Tsukishiro, Fujitaka noticed looked very much like Touya's best friend and lover, Yukito. Fujitaka was still coming to terms with the fact that Yukito had another personality, Yue. But as long as they were happy together, Fujitaka didn't mind the contented threesome. Although, sometimes Fujitaka would feel a slight bit of regret whenever he caught Yue. The angel wasn't very comfortable around him, and he wondered what his apparent past life had done to him. 

"You seem very deep in thought, Kinomoto-sensei . . ." Tsukishiro remarked gently.

Fujitaka smiled at him, the boy was always so formal. Grabbing Tsukishiro's hand, Fujitaka paused. "Please call me Fujitaka . . .?"

The jade eyed boy blushed under his deep brown hair, Fujitaka blinked, it was even in the same style as Yukito's, he frowned slightly, there was something odd about this . . .

"Only . . ." Tsukishiro started, then looked up suddenly, he glanced at a nearby pond. "Come with me?" Fujitaka allowed himself to be pulled over to the water's edge, as they knelt, Tsukishiro clasped Fujitaka's hands and smiled, "Only if you call me Yukito."

"Eh-?" Fujitaka looked at him, "Tsukishiro Yukito? . . . But your name on the register . . ."

"Hai!" Tsukishiro blushed slightly, "It's my middle name, I don't allow many to use my first name, 'Yukito'" He chuckled at some old memory, "It was a gift to me . . ."

Fujitaka was shocked, and tried hard not to show Tsukishiro this, "My son has a . . . friend called the exact same thing . . ."

The smile on Yukito's face grew slightly, "Does he really? Good . . ." He leaned over the water, and whispered to his reflection. "That makes my job so much easier." 

Fujitaka leant over the water, and gasped. The reflection wasn't his own; it wasn't even a night in the reflection, with a bright blue sky above him, a strange man looked back at Fujitaka. He laughed as Fujitaka sat up suddenly. 

"What is that?"

Yukito looked at him, "His name was Clow Reed . . . I loved him so very much . . ."

"You loved him?" Fujitaka glanced at the water, "Who are you?"

"Look into the water . . . and you will find out . . ."

Fujitaka leaned towards the water, there was something moving under the surface. "What is that?" When Yukito didn't answer, he looked up. The wide-eyed, brown haired boy had been replaced by a Dragon-winged humanoid, with jet-black hair. 

Fujitaka gasped as some of his previous life's memory pushed it's way forward with alarm and panic. "Hei-ying!"

"Hello Clow . . ." Hei-ying's single jade eye was bright with happiness as he started to reach forward, to press his cold, pale hand against Fujitaka's cheek. "I love you . . ."

Fujitaka didn't have enough time to draw a second breath as something scaly wrapped around his neck, and dragged him into the pond. Hei-ying stood and stepped over the water, he watched as the sun guardian of his new Mistress held Fujitaka down. Fujitaka's eyes were wide as he struggled hard to get loose, bubbles of air and streams of blood starting to leak out of his mouth as the Dragon tightened his grip on his chest. Hei-ying closed his deep jade eye as he saw Fujitaka finally give up. The Dragon raised itself out of the water, "Such a feeble man . . ." It growled, "Humans are disgustingly pitiful . . ."

Hei-ying nodded as he walked back to the water bank, the Dragon held Fujitaka under the water until it had fully left the water and stood beside Hei-ying. Fujitaka's lifeless body floated on the surface of the pond, "Mistress . . .?" The Dragon called out, "He's dead."

The Mistress reappeared, nearby and stepped towards her new moon guardian, "Well done . . . Now, there is only one more to go . . . and then my foolish past life's decision will be revoked . . ." She stood near the pond, expecting something to happen. The Dragon and Hei-ying exchanged a look, before she turned, "Nothing is happening! Why hasn't this reincarnation's power come to me?" She spat at the floating body; "Of course! Clow Reed must have made sure that his powers travelled to the nearest relative! How *kind* of him!"

"He mentioned he had a son . . . Perhaps his power has gone to him . . ." Hei-ying suggested softly; he couldn't take his eyes off the body of Fujitaka. He suddenly felt an emotion he had never felt before, he didn't like the fact he had just led Fujitaka to his death. He didn't like the idea that he had just taken the life of one of Clow's reincarnations. Fujitaka had been a kind man, Hei-ying had felt this, and was completely honest with his attempts to help Fujitaka. The way Fujitaka looked at Hei-ying when he completed a difficult task was the same way Clow used to look at him. Hei-ying felt the emotion roll slightly in his heart, as he reached into the water and fished out the dead man's wallet.

"We must seek out the other and this one's son." His new Mistress walked over to him, "What are you doing?"

Hei-ying turned the soaked wallet in his hands, "I don't think I killed the right one . . ."

"This is Clow Reed's reincarnation!" His Mistress tapped her staff on the ground harshly.

"No . . . I mean . . ." Hei-ying looked at the body, a cold feeling rolling in his heart, "He had all the little things that Clow had when he was in love with me . . ."

His Mistress' pale hand crept and wound into his hair, she yanked him up quickly, "And I am all of the Clow Reed that fucked you!" His Mistress observed in a quietly dry tone, "Which would you prefer? The one who fell in love with Yue?" She hissed into his ear, singing her mocking little tune, "And then it will be, forever and always, Yue, Yue, *Yue*!!"

"No! It isn't fair!" Hei-ying eye's widened as he pushed her arm away, "I was your most---"

His Mistress let go of him and pulled him into a harsh kiss, Hei-ying wrapped his arms around her instantly. She was the one that slept with him; Fujitaka was wavering because of guilt. She smiled predatorily as she pushed Hei-ying away, "You are my most perfect creation . . ." She purred as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, "You weren't the mistake . . . that Little Sunbeam and the Little Moonbeam were . . ."

"Indeed, Mistress Kyree . . ." Hei-ying nodded, and glanced at his new brother, the sun guardian. The Dragon returned to his false form, a small Dragon with a razor blade sharp tail. The Dragon wrapped itself around his Mistress' staff, and became one with it. She tapped the staff on the ground, before turning away from him, "Hei-ying, my most precious uke . . . Find Yue and Keroberos . . ." Mystrasa Kyree smiled over her shoulder, "Where you find them . . . you will find Clow Reed's magic . . ."

Hei-ying nodded, and began his flight.

****IN THE NOW****

The flight had been long, and arduous upon his torn wing. He folded the weaker scaled appendage under the other in his habitual way. Since Keroberos had broken it, the wing had always been the weaker. His new Mistress had replaced Clow's white-feathered wings with black Dragon wings. His feet now firmly planted upon the roof, he gazed out upon the deserted street.

"Now," He murmured to no one in particular, "Where are you . . .?"

He could see through a few un-curtained windows, saw a little blonde boy playing with his toys. Probably squealing with delight, the child peered up at a much-loved parent. The sight made his lip curl with disgust. The winged being focused once more on his task; the sight of the adoring child was unsettling his cold heart. It brought once happy feelings forward, ones he had thought he had destroyed long ago. They threatened his purpose. The child looked so happy. He looked like Yue when Clow used to play with him. His eye narrowed, //NO!!// The part of him that hate had taken as it's stronghold screamed, //I want justice, I want revenge . . .//

"My dear, sweet, little brothers . . ." He giggled inanely, "Where are you? . . . come out, come out wherever you are . . ." His voice took a chilling note as he began to sing a centuries old song, that he used to sing for them, he twisted the lullaby coldly, "Little Sunbeam, Little Moonbeam . . . Where are you? . . . Little Sunbeam, Little Moonbeam . . . I've finally found you . . . " His dark jade eye settled on a single house on the corner of the road, his lips curling again this time in cold amusement. "Revenge . . . colder than the Freeze card could ever serve." He began to chuckle, his mirth twisted by the insanity he had had since childhood, and the murderous desire that had turned his black heart to ice.

His dark, scaled wings spread, and he stepped to the edge of the rooftop. The moonlight glinted off the ancient but sharp pair of scissors he had tied to his ankle. 

 For a brief moment, he pressed a pale hand against the right side of his face. He brushed the longer side of his black, shiny fringe away, and pressed his hand against the hollow that was where his right eye had once resided. The eye Keroberos had claimed, during their last fight. The cold fingers trailed over to the fleshy ruins of his right ear. The ear Yue had managed to cut off, when he escaped briefly and used his icicles on Hei-ying.

"An eye for an eye, Keroberos . . ." He grinned darkly, as he pulled the fringe back over the ancient scars, hiding them once more from the world. " . . . And an ear for an ear, Yue . . ." The dark eye once again settled on the small house at the corner of the road. 

"I've come to finish . . ." Hei-ying hissed, " . . . what I should have begun all those years ago . . ."

Every Story Must Have A Beginning . . . And Every Story Must Have A Middle . . . But Must Every Story . . .

_. . . Have An End?_

.    .    . *    T   o    *    B   e    *    C   o   n   t   i   n   u   e   d    * .     .     .


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